A/N: Well, it's coming to the big showdown when King Ashura comes around. I'm chomping at the bit to get at it. Thanks for reading everyone.

Part Thirty-Nine:

"You're home," Tanya said as Zellen walked into the parlor with slumped shoulders and a stiff neck.

"You weren't kidding when you called that the test from hell," he grumbled. He watched her and Drysi set aside their playing cards. They both gave him expectant looks. "The last part of the written, I know I screwed up. It sucked so bad because it was all about hexes, and I did what I could. Maybe I should have done some more tracing with Fai, but he would always goof around too much and give me the wrong spells half the time, the big schmuck. Oh well..."

"The practical?"

Zellen lofted a small crate. "It was a success."

"I knew it would be," Drysi said. He set the crate down on the card table.

His aunt peered in and said, "There are fifteen vials in here. Didn't they have you make thirty batches?"

"I gave the other fifteen to my test subject. He was a really nice guy that really deserved them for putting up with my first blunder," Zellen explained.

"Well, good. I'm sure you did fine, Zel. We'll just wait on the letter. Oh, by the way, did you decide what kind of job you want to apply for? There's a need for an apothecary here. It's getting hard for me to be mayor and write prescriptions. People would be happy if you hung out your shingle."

"I had something else in mind. I'm going to apply to ride circuit."

Tanya inhaled sharply, her eyes wide. Drysi even looked a little concerned. "I know it's really good money, but, Zellen, that's really unpleasant work. You'll always be on the ley lines and be looking at some of the most dire cases. You won't have a hot meal or a soft place to sleep. It's cold, cold, cold work. Plus, as a part of your contract, at any time you can be pressed into the army. That's why I left. That whole revolt on Valeria was... well, revolting. I was pressed into the army because they lacked healers and I had to serve there. Remember when you were five and I had to be apart from you because I was on Valeria? You cried so much. That's why I switched to being an apothecary for one town. I wanted to give you a stable life."

"I know, but I really want to make a difference. I want some connection to my parents. I think you'll understand that. I feel really good about my choice."

Tanya sighed and nodded. "Well, I'll support your choice. But you should really ask Drysi, since you'll be gone from her a fair bit."

Zellen looked over at her, hoping she'd be understanding. She gave him a smile. "If that's what you want to do, then I support it, too."

"If you're going to ride circuit then I don't see a reason for you and Drysi to find a separate home. She can keep me company while you're gone," Tanya said with a bright smile.

"Thanks so much, Auntie."

"Dinner?" she asked him.

"No, bed please. My eyes can't stay open too much longer."

"I'll tuck him in," Drysi said. He scooped up his crate, staff, and papers and then they went off to his bedroom early. Zellen peeled off his outer clothing and crawled under the covers.

"So it's okay? Me riding circuit?" he mumbled into his pillow.

"Yes. I'll miss you when you're gone, but it'll be fine. Your aunt is wonderful company."

He glanced over at her. She picked up a vial out of the crate. He felt a little awkward and surprised. After all, he was the one who had approached her all four times for sex. He'd hate to discourage her if she was now comfortable in approaching him. Exhaustion won out, and he said dismally, "Um.. I'm really kind of tired."

"I know. That's why I was going to rub your shoulders and hold you until you fell asleep," she explained. Now it was obvious she had innocent, sweet intentions. He felt really touched, because there was more tenderness and caring in that offer than what he originally thought she was offering.

Zellen gave her a bright smile, blushing at his initial assumption. He accepted her gift with, "I'd so appreciate you doing that."


"So, do you think your father will still be mad?"

Kurogane sighed. Fai was the one to finally breach the subject. They had been riding horses back inland most of the day. Fei-Wang was draped over a horse borrowed from a villager, still sound asleep and tied up. Most of the day had been quiet. They heard word from a traveler that Lord Suwa was camped out on the edge of a village named Nara. The group had successfully killed off the remaining, ten demons.

"It's not like him to get angry, nor to hold onto it for very long. I don't know what's going on with him, other than disappointment."

Fai didn't miss the tightness in Kurogane's voice at that last word. The ninja had never been one for hiding his feelings or lying, but not one for relying on others much, either. It was as if he was under a great deal of stress and was unwilling to share his burden. He was very stubborn like that.

"I'm sure your father isn't disappointed. He probably wishes I was gone, and your invitation just came as a shock. He was probably counting on things going the way he pictured after my father comes to fetch me."

"But I have a different picture for my life. I want you in it. I want you, here, with me. Even if you go back, my desire for you wouldn't change."

Fai felt bleakness eat at the edge of his thoughts. "If I choose to stay, your parents will have to accept me in your life. You know that, don't you? If I stay and they don't accept me, it'll stress our relationship to the point where it will fall apart. I had too much stress when I was a little child. I don't want that, now that I'm older.

"I would sooner leave you than cause you the pain of strife with your parents. I know how much you love them, and, just like you won't come between Yuui, Ashura, and me, I won't come between you and Lord and Lady Suwa. I love you too much to destroy something you treasure so much: your relationship with your parents."

"I treasure my relationship with you, too." Kurogane and Fai halted their horses and Fai gave Kurogane a baffled look. "My parents have always instilled in me a sense of fidelity to the people I love." Kurogane put his palm on Fai's jaw and rubbed his calloused thumb over Fai's cheek in slow circles, just gazing in Fai's eyes for several, long moments.

Kurogane rarely gave tender gestures like this, being more straightforward. It knocked the air out of Fai and made him want to melt against Kurogane. The ninja said, "That means I owe you fidelity, too. I swore to you, until the very last moment, mage, and I mean it. I'll fight to the last minute. I'm aware that last minute maybe weeks from now or it could be years from now, so I'm willing to talk it over with my father."

Fai clasped Kurogane's hand and kissed his palm in a slow, gentle, sensual way. "I adore you with my whole heart. I only want to do what's best for you."

"What's best for me, is you," Kurogane said, before pressing a deep, passionate kiss. Fai wrapped his arms around Kurogane's shoulders and let him have control of the kiss. Kurogane finally let Fai go when they where both almost out of air. He laid his forehead on Fai's. "Please stay with me."

Fai felt his stomach churn. He was being asked to step into a hostile situation and into another life and culture that he wasn't sure welcomed him entirely. Still, there was Kurogane, and he'd grown to need Kurogane. Plus, there was Yuui that needed looking after that tugged at Fai in the other direction. He was terrified of his next choice in life, but he needed to make it.

"I'll stay with you, here in Suwa. I don't know how that'll shape up, with Yuui and all, because he really needs me... but I've grown to love everything here. Have me, Kurogane, I'm yours for the rest of your life."

After several more steamy kisses, Kurogane parted from Fai. "Is that your final answer, my mage..., no, I mean... Fai. I mean to call you 'Fai' for the rest of my life rather than 'mage.' I hope you know what that means in my culture."

Fai had picked up that it meant a deep, abiding relationship when first names were most commonly used in addressed. Usually, only married couple used that intimate address all the time. "Yes, I figured it out."

"Good. Because I'm going to fight for you."

Fai smiled and rested his head against Kurogane's shoulder. "I know you don't say it in your culture, but I love you."

"And I love you, too, Fai. With everything I have, my body, soul, and worldly goods, I give them all to you," Kurogane responded without a pause.

Fai felt tears comes to his eyes, but they were happy tears. Kurogane was pledging himself to him. He was determined to do the same. "I give you my body, soul, and worldly goods, too."

Their horses whinnied so they parted their embrace. Kurogane was wearing as close to a goofy grin as Fai had ever seen. He didn't make a wisecrack, prizing the rare expression too much. They rode on in silence, finally getting to Nara.

It was actually Ran that greeted them on the outskirts. "Well, cousin, I see you got Fei-Wang."

"Fai did it, not me. I was busy with a dragon he brought over."

"Dragon? So your vi... your mage took him down?"

"Yes. He's a skilled mage. I thought you knew that by now, tasting a hex personally," Kurogane said. Fai didn't miss the pride in his lover's voice, so Fai gave Ran a bright smile. Not that he wouldn't mind another go at beating up the nasty redhead, but he'd be nice for now.

Ran snorted and gave Kurogane a hot glare. "Your father wants to speak to you..." Then he looked over at Fai and said with emphasis, "...alone."

Kurogane dismounted his horse, as did Fai. He gave Ran a matching glare and said, "I'm not a single person any more. My father will see me with Fai."

Ran looked shocked for a moment and then nodded. He took the horses' reins and said, "We'll take care of Fei-Wang."

"Good. He's yours to deal with," Kurogane said before leading Fai to the inner encampment.

"Are you nervous?" Fai asked.

Kurogane shook his head. "What's meant to happen, will happen. I'm not going to bend so another outcome will happen and part us. You're my bit of dumb luck I stumbled over because of your arrogance. We won't be parted easily."

Fai couldn't help smiling over that, in spite of the whole circumstance of their meeting. He'd never want to put Yuui's life in jeopardy again, but meeting Kurogane had been a highlight of his life. They entered Lord Suwa's tent and knelt in front of him. His expression was harsh, so Fai expected this would not be pleasant.

"I'll put it plainly since the both of you are here. I want the mage gone by the end of this month when his father arrives. End of story. Enough is enough. I've indulged you a lot with this, Kurogane, because when you were a child I was very strict."

"Even if Fai is taken from me, my feelings for him will remain. You could try to have me woo half of Nihongo, but I won't find anyone like Fai. I told you before, it wasn't that Fai is male or female, but that Fai is Fai. And that's why I want him. It's hard for you to hear. I know that and regret any pain this is causing you, but that's how it is. I consider him my mate."

"He can't be your mate because he can't produce an heir for Suwa! Mates produce heirs!"

"Is that what you're upset about? That Fai and I can't have natural children?" Kurogane asked.

His father looked as if he were about to explode like a firework. "No! It's because your life will be more difficult if you persist in this! You have to command respect! This tryst of yours will undermine any authority you will be expected to command. My men have turned a blind eye, because they think of it as a battlefield tryst, like I do. However, you must command respect from the people we protect, the farmers, who are very traditional. They won't tolerate someone like Fai. And my men won't tolerate it if this were to wear on for years."

"Many people, warriors and farmers, like Fai a great deal and are beholden to him for his wards. Fai is very winsome, I'm sure they'll overlook my relationship with him after a while."

"Then what about your status in Edo? Have you thought about that? Not everyone is like Princess Tomoyo. There are several influential people that could harm how you operate Suwa when they get offended by you bedding a male."

"And I plan on be open, yet, circumspect about Fai. I won't flaunt it, but neither will I hide it. You taught me to have true strength and to protect the people I love."

"You aren't protecting me and your mother. This will affect us from here on out if you choose this path. I mean, think about your frail mother. Also, think of this: whoever your mate is must be prepared to take up her duties as miko. The mage is not a miko. He has no deep knowledge of our culture and religious traditions."

"But I'm willing to learn your ways, Lord Suwa," Fai said, lowering his eyes in deference towards the man.

"Fai is extremely bright, Father, and he's eager to learn our traditions."

"But you can't tell me he practices our religion," Lord Suwa pointed out.

"No, sir. I do have another religion I was raised in, and I do honor and practice it. But because I honor Kurogane, I respect the religion of Nihongo."

"We worship the ancestors that came before us. As an adopted person, could you worship your blood relatives that came before you?"

"I'd sooner lick broken glass. I'd spit on their graves if I ever went to Valeria again. I'll detest them until the day I die," Fai said darkly, bitterly, and quickly. Even Kurogane flinched at his nastiness. Yes, he despised them that much for what they had done to Yuui more than himself. "But that doesn't mean I can't respect your traditions."

Lord Suwa looked horrified at what Fai had just said. Kurogane said swiftly, "Fai's grandfather was a sick person that abused him and his brother a great deal. His brother was abused in the most vile, heinous, and unspoken way. He's not worth honoring."

Fai figured people in Nihongo didn't talk about child abuse much directly, but had their own subtle code for knowing what was going on. Lord Suwa's expression darkened and there was a slight nod of his head; Lord Suwa must have understood the sexual abuse that had happened to Yuui by how Kurogane phrased everything.

"I see," Lord Suwa said mollified, yet with some sorrow. Lord Suwa looked at Fai. "You know you'll ruin my son if you stay?"

Fai squared his shoulders and looked him eye-to-eye. "I love your son. He invited me to stay and I want to. I know this isn't your ideal, but I hope you can accept me one day. I've grown to care so much about you and Lady Suwa and Nihongo. Kurogane is fully aware of all of your concerns, and yet, he still wants me. I'll do everything I can to mitigate any discomfort, and I swear to be discrete, even though I'm not exactly the most discrete person."

Lord Suwa took a deep breath and his shoulders slumped. "I worry about the end of Suwa. Many will attack us if they know Kurogane is in a relationship with a male. It means that our lineage will end, and that will open us for attacks from many different provinces. You see that it'll cause warfare?"

Fai wilted and felt on the verge of tears; it was something he hadn't thought of. Lord Suwa put a hand on Fai's shoulder, and it was sympathetic. "Please, if you care about Kurogane, stop making his life harder than it needs to be. Love him by leaving, so he can make a family and have respect."

"Lord Suwa, if I was a woman, would you be saying the same things to me?" Fai asked.

He looked taken aback. "Well... no... I probably wouldn't."

"So if I could bear children, then all of this would be over looked."

"Not necessarily," Lord Suwa snapped. "These aren't trivial concerns. You are still foreign."

"I can't help these things," Fai said. He gave Lord Suwa a nervous, warm smile. "I wish I could change things, but even with all my magic, I can't. But what I can do is make your son happy. I ask you to give me the chance to do that. All your concerns, I promise, I'll make them minimal, and I promise I'll do my utmost to respect your traditions and culture. This is what I can do."

"You still can't give him children."

"I want to adopt with him, one day, and pass down our knowledge to children."

Lord Suwa turned to Kurogane. "So you're really picking this and all the hardships that comes with it? With the potential warfare against Suwa you'll constantly face?"

Kurogane took Fai's hand and nodded. "I'll deal with anything that comes so I can possess Fai."

Lord Suwa's expression grew dismal and his head lowered. "I see your obstinate heart has fixated on this... foreign vixen. I was mistaken to let it go on. Leave me now while I decide whether to keep you or disinherit you."

Fai felt a horrible shock run through him. He looked over at Kurogane, who had squared shoulders and a set jaw. "I'll accept your decision, Father."

"Please. I'll leave! I know how much Kurogane loves Suwa. Don't let me prevent him from contributing to its protection. He loves it so much, and I won't interfere with his love for his land. Please, please... I'll leave, but don't disinherit Kurogane!"

Kurogane gripped Fai's shoulders and shook his head, utter calm was on his face. "What will happen, will happen."

"Leave my sight now," Lord Suwa said, head still low. Kurogane tugged Fai out of the tent and over to a place behind a building so they could have privacy.

"But, Kuro...!"

"No. If my father decides to disinherit me, he does. I'll still love Suwa, and I'll do what I can to protect her."

"You know..." Fai stomach roiled, but he said, "...you could always live with me in Celes."

Kurogane seemed surprised and then shook his head. "I'll live and die in Suwa. It's a part of me. To live in Celes, I just couldn't do it."

Fai nodded, heartbroken that Kurogane's father was so obstinate. Fai lied, "I understand. I knew that before I asked, but I felt I should offer."

Kurogane grabbed Fai around the waist and brought him close. "If I'm disinherited, I'll find another place for us to live next to Suwa. It won't be easy, but I'll find a place for us, and I will take care of you for the rest of my life."

Fai leaned into Kurogane's arms. "Please don't destroy yourself for me. I'm not worth it."

"You are a treasure I found by a dumb accident. You're mine now, and I must take responsibility for taking care of you. So, shut your mouth already, dumb mage."

Fai, for once, did as Kurogane bid and settled into his arms.


"I can't look!" Zellen said, handing the sealed letters to his aunt and carefully clutched Drysi around her waist. Tanya gave him a mocking, cross expression. She opened up the first one and gave her nephew a wide smile.

"You are now Zellen D Vagin! You did suck on the hex portion. I really don't understand how you're so bad at hexes because of how malicious of a prankster you are. Your other scores brought you up. Wonderful! I'm so proud," she said and hugged him.

"I am, too," Drysi said with a wide smile.

He hugged his aunt back and and asked, "The other letter?"

She opened it and read. She looked over to him with a disgruntled, but restrained, attitude. "You've been accepted as a circuit rider. You start next week with Sergei D Orlov as your trainer."

Zellen had to bite his tongue hard when he heard that news; that's why his aunt was looking so sour and ready to spit nails. When he was young, Tanya and Sergei were lovers. They broke up, but he wasn't clear why. He was very young when it happened.

Sergei would have had to volunteer his time for this, therefor, there was something strange behind that. His aunt and the man had also been partners as circuit riders, but Zellen had a feeling it was his addition to the equation that helped break them up when he was young, and she came back from her impressment on Valeria. He hoped not, but he was afraid that's what had happened. Though the man did act like a father figure to him for a while, he had drifted out of Zellen's life.

"Well, if Sergei will have me, I guess I have to," Zellen said, in a disproving tone, hoping his aunt would think he was disgruntled in spite of really wanting to see Sergei again.

She saw through that and shook her head. "Well, you're to meet him at Luval next week in the morning." She handed him the letters and stalked off.

To be continued.