Part Forty-One:

Kurogane found his father meditating in the family dojo. He sat in front of Lord Suwa just as the man opened his crimson eyes.

"I hadn't sent for you."

"But we need to talk."

"Have you reconsidered things?"

"No. I just can't ignore my heart. If I start ignoring my heart, I'll lose the strength I've found, lately. It seems as if all you can see are the bad things Fai could bring to my life. Can you see any of the good he does for me?"

Lord Suwa looked taken aback and then baffled. For a moment, Kurogane thought his father was going to chide him, but instead he grew thoughtful. He took a deep breath and his brow furrowed. "He's had a mellowing effect on you. Your temper is not nearly so quick. He's also taught you to rely on someone else outside of your own strength. You've always stubbornly sought to prove how no one is compared to you as far as fighting ability, but now you seem so confident in your abilities you no longer brag. And..."

Lord Suwa took a long steading breath. "...you've found the value in gentleness and kindness. No matter how much I want to deny it, you've found a deep, abiding love. I've known this for a while, but I thought your filial piety would overcome that. Then I thought about your mother a few moments ago while meditating."

"What about Mother?"

"I thought about what she means to me and what she's done for me in my life, outside of bearing you. You know, she almost died giving you life. I had never felt such a darkness in my life, the idea of losing her. The pain in my chest..." Lord Suwa choked up as he allowed himself to the relive the dreadful memory. "...the fire there threatened to consume me. When the both of you lived I felt such a soaring joy. We were both sorrowed to learn she couldn't bear any more children, so we poured all of out hopes and dreams into you, You-ou."

Kurogane was shocked at hearing his father speak his true, hidden name, the one he never ever shared, even with Fai. Lord Suwa gave Kurogane a shallow smile and continued. "That hasn't been entirely fair to you, at times. It's been a burden I put on your young shoulders, but one you accepted gladly. I've seen how serious and dedicated you are to Suwa. Your hard work and devotion have pleasantly astounded me and, I'm positive, made your ancestors proud."

"I'm honored and humbled to be from the lineage of Suwa. It's my greatest pride to serve the people here, and it's not something I ever want to turn my back on. It would be a great disgrace to me if you were to cast me out. I'd not know what to do except find shelter in a neighboring place and do what I could to help Suwa for the rest of my life. It's all you've raised me to do. I would know no other way of life. I have no other desire except to protect Suwa, with the exception for my mage. I want those desires to run together."

"I know. It was the way I was raised, to serve Suwa, as well as those that came before us. I know your heart is truly dedicated to Suwa. Even if I disinherited you, you would never truly leave. And that's why I've come to the conclusion your heart has grown to love Fai with the same kind of devotion. You won't give him up. Even if the ice king takes him back to Celes forever, you'd never accept another mate your mother would choose, would you?"

Kurogane shook his head, his shoulders slumped slightly. "No. I'd never betray my heart and what it wants."

"Then you'd never marry a woman and have children with her."

"You're right. I'd feel as if I was betraying what I have with Fai, as if I was soiling my heart. I want to have natural children, but it has to be on my terms, and with Fai's agreement. I can't tell you how that will work."

"Ahh... that obstinate heart of yours, Kurogane. I think you get it from your mother. She clings onto things with passion and tenacity. She talked to me before I came here and told me she sensed how much pain I was causing you. She could see your aura was ailing. She said this tension between us was harming your spirit in ways I hadn't thought about. That's why I came here to meditate on what to do with you."

"I can't give up Fai. He means everything to me. I also can't give up Suwa because it's the only thing I know. I'm so torn, but I'm not confused. I need Fai, and if I have to love him and serve Suwa at a distance, it's a bitter fate I'll accept."

"None of your cousins would have this much passion or love for Suwa. If they were cast out, they wouldn't stay by the border to do whatever they could to help for the rest of their lives. I want to hand over the rule of Suwa to you. I've always dreamed of the day I could hand over the protection of Suwa with confidence and grace to you. So..." Lord Suwa took a deep breath and fixed Kurogane with a hard look. "...if I allow you to have your mage, you acknowledge all the trouble you're bringing on us?"

Kurogane's stomach sank. "I'm very aware. I'll meet all those challenges the way you taught me, with true strength and perseverance. I've taken a vow with Fai, not until the last minute it would be impossible for us to be together would we ever part ways. Impossible is not the same as difficult. Father, I just ask, will you stand by my side since I've chosen Fai as my mate? Will you please support me?

"I know I'm asking something contrary to what you believe, but Fai is a piece of me, now. Like I've always maintained, he doesn't have the best character, with his lying and all, but his heart is soft and kind. It was abused early, so he doesn't let many see who he really is. It's hard to fight through and see his true self, but I know he's worthy of my love, because I put in that effort and know his heart."

Lord Suwa let out a large sigh and looked as if he were weighing things out. "I don't hate the mage of Celes in the least. He always brings a smile to my face. And I do like the effect he has on you. You know I do really like your mage a great deal?"

"Yes."

"Well, if you're willing to face down these problems, how can I not do the same? I've always taught you to face each challenge with squared shoulders and bravery. How can I not lead by example?"

Kurogane lowered his head in deference. "Thank you, Father. I promise to bring nothing but honor to Suwa."

"I know you will, You-ou. Now, go send me your mage. I want to talk with him for a few moments. Alone."

Kurogane left with a deep, respectful bow.


Minutes later, Fai showed up. He was very nervous, in spite of Kurogane's encouragement. He came into the dojo and performed the bow that he wasn't used to, in perfect respect to Lord Suwa.

Lord Suwa's gaze was intense. "Kurogane's heart is passionately and intensely fixated on you."

"I'm really afraid for his undoing. I never wanted things to grow into this. I thought it was only temporary, our situation, but I want to stay. I don't know that you appreciate what that would entail for me."

"You mean leaving your twin and the ice king?"

"I don't know if you understand how my twin is. He was born with empathy, so that means his emotions are effected by anyone around him. I've always played the buffer between him and people. I mean, he managed to make one friend... yeash... that stupid, idiot Zellen. Boy, I hate his guts." Fai gave a chuckle, remembering hexing the jerk's skis when Yuui started paying too much attention to that guy. "I'm sure that jerk still enjoys skiing. Ha..ha..ha..."

He got serious and shook his head. Fai then said, "And because I love and trust King Ashura, I accepted this punishment. It's hard, because, as Kurogane mentioned, Yuui was very abused. He doesn't remember it, and there are a lot of things he needs sheltering from."

"Yet you want to stay here rather than convalesce your brother?" Lord Suwa asked.

"King Ashura was right to part us. If he didn't at the time, I don't think either of us would ever learn to function without each other as adults. I just pray Yuui learned the same as me. I do worry about it."

"I'm sorry for your brother's suffering."

"Thank you. It was very horrible for him, and he, thankfully, doesn't remember a thing. I wish the rest of his life would be wonderful to make up for it. I just thank the spring goddess he doesn't remember that horror. But listen, being with Kurogane has grown on me a great deal. I learned to embrace who I am. I'm a combat mage, whether or not I like it. He's done so much to change me for the better. I don't lie as much, and I look at reality with more balance."

"I know, and are you willing to face our society's attitude towards your relationship? Like I said, you both will face many hardships, as will Lady Suwa and I."

"I'm more than willing to meet any challenges to be by Kurogane's side. Lord Suwa, are you willing to stand by me? I know it's not what you want, but I adore your son with my whole heart. There is nothing I wouldn't do for him."

Lord Suwa was agonized but he met those wide, blue eyes. He sighed and shook his head slowly. "It seems I can't stop this, and his mother desires peace. I'll allow it... reluctantly. You'll have to create a lot of good will among the people of Suwa. I don't think you can among the farmers, but you can try. As far as Edo, I have a feeling you're beguiling and cunning enough to protect my son's interests."

"Don't worry about the farmers! They'll love me! You wait and see. I have a special spell for killing weeds."

Lord Suwa found himself laughing in spite of himself. "I really like you, Mage. Damn, I hate to admit it, but you are good for my son."

Lord Suwa suppressed a chuckle and shook his head. There was a part of him that so wanted to hate Fai, but he couldn't. The mage's personality was infections and enchanting.

"So, Lord Kuro-papa-sama, do you forgive me for loving your son?"

Lord Suwa let out a large breath and actually gave a smile. "Both you and my son are brave to stand up and meet any challenges that come your way. I respect that, a great deal, and I will let you pursue a loving relationship with my son."

"Great!" Fai exclaimed and threw his arms around Lord Suwa's neck. Lord Suwa was shocked at the forwardness and almost knocked to the floor by the grateful mage. "Thank you, Lord Kuro-papa-sama!"

"My son wasn't kidding about you," Lord Suwa said, getting Fai to sit on his own. He started patting Fai's soft hair to calm the mage. "You are an affectionate little thing, aren't you?"

"Sorry, I'm just so happy you'll have me."

Lord Suwa sighed and said, "We'll have to plan a lot of things, if my son is to have you as a permanent bed mate, but I'll do what I can to make you two possible."

"I'll do what you order me to do," Fai pledged, leaning more into Lord Suwa's comforting hand on his head.


"Welcome home," Tanya said, as Zellen walked in the front door.

He paused and blurted out awkwardly, knowing she was going to be pissed off at him, "I brought home a house guest. I hope you don't mind."

He then lead in Sergei before his aunt could bluster at him. She clenched her jaw shut and nodded. She said in a frosty tone, "Hello, Sergei."

"It's been a long time, Tanya. Zellen says you're keeping busy."

"You could say that," she replied dryly.

"Zellen?" Drysi asked, coming into the living room. "You're home early," she said, delighted. She looked over at Sergei, started, and backed away from him a little, hiding behind Zellen and getting very bashful.

"It's okay. This is Sergei D Orlov, my trainer," he said, giving her an encouraging smile.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," she said softly.

"Well," Sergei said, clasping his hands in midair. "Zellen seems to think I need to take you to the Purple Hen for dinner and drinks so we can catch up on old times."

"What? But Zellen just got home and it's high winter!" she protested, crossing her arms in a snit.

"All the better reason to have some grog and reminisce," Sergei said. "Besides, I think the young folks want some alone time."

"But..."

"Please, Auntie, go catch up with Sergei. I promise we'll catch up tomorrow morning." Zellen quickly got her sable coat out of the closet and wrapped it around her shoulders. "Now don't be out past curfew and remember, all four feet on the floor at all times!"

Sergei chuckled as Tanya's face turned purple. "Zellen... how dare...!" she sputtered in outrage. Sergei put his arm around her shoulders and tugged her towards the foyer.

When they left, Zellen turned to Drysi. "So, would you like to break the feet rule?"

"You're incorrigible," she said. He tugged her to his bedroom, feeling on cloud nine.

"And needy. Don't forget needy. It was very cold and lonely."


Kurogane woke to the sound of Fai getting up and walking over to the window. He opened it and leaned on the sill, looking utterly depressed. Kurogane rose and joined Fai at the window.

"Don't lose hope. I plan on persuading the ice king."

"Hun? I know you are," Fai said, pushing on a fake smile.

"Then why so glum?"

Fai's lip quivered. "It's our birthday, and I don't have Yuui. And I still haven't felt him cast in the longest time. I feel Ashura, but not him. I'm very scared."

Kurogane put his arm around Fai's shoulders. "I'm sure your father would have sent word if something was really wrong with your twin. Don't worry about him."

"I'm trying not to, but it's impossible. It's just that our birthday really reminded me."

"You're birthday? Hold on," Kurogane said. He went over to a chest in the corner of his room. He removed a large box and set it beside Fai. "I was going to give you this when your father came. I wanted to give you something special to remember Nihongo if things don't go our way, so I had it made in Edo. But I also wanted to put something of Celes into it, too; that's why the design and colors."

Fai tore open into the box, now looking a bit more chipper. "Oh... this is gorgeous!"

Fai held up the furisode. It was dark blue at the hem and then faded to white around the shoulders. It had a gold and green phoenix on the back as it sank into emerald flames.

"You like it?"

"I love it, Kuro-gernerous!" Fai flung himself into Kurogane's arms, almost taking the ninja to the floor.

"Knock it off, pampered snot!"

"Yes, but who's spoiling me now? Not hoards of Celians, just you, Kurgs," Fai said in false coyness.

"Well, try it on already," Kurogane said, crossing his arms. Fai pulled the shutters and closed the window. He quickly peeled out of his night clothes and flung on the furisode. He turned his back to Kurogane to show off the decorative side. Kurogane smiled, pleased with how it looked on Fai. "It looks nice."

"Nice? How about fetching or handsome or sexy?"

"Yeah, yeah, all of those," Kurogane said, long since used to Fai's greed for compliments.

"Let me put it on properly, and I'll join you for breakfast. I'm starving."

Kurogane left and joined his parents for tea. "So where is your mage?" Lord Suwa asked.

"Putting on the gift I had made for him," Kurogane said. His father picked up tea and took a sip.

"Well, how do I look?"

Kurogane didn't look over his shoulder at Fai in the doorway because he was busy flinching when his father sputtered out tea in his direction.

Lady Suwa giggled and nodded. "What a beautiful furisode, mage."

Kurogane was cleaning off tea from his yukata when he turned his head. He sighed as Fai twirled on his toes, showing off, and then pranced over to the tea table.

"Stop acting so girlish, you fop," Kurogane grumbled.

Lord Suwa snorted and gave out a half chuckle. "You give your mage a furisode and then tell him to stop acting girlish? That's rich."

"Nice pointing out Kuro-pu's hypocrisy, Lord Kuro-papa-sama," Fai gloated and joined the Suwa family at the table.

"Why must you always turn my parents against me?" Kurogane raged.

"Crabby, crabby, crabby," Fai said all sing-songy.

"So what's the special occasion for the gift, Son?" Lady Suwa asked, restraining her laugher.

"It's Fai's birthday, and he was missing his twin," Kurogane explained. "I was planning it as a parting gift, but I gave it to him early to cheer him up."

"Happy birthday, mage," Lady Suwa said with good cheer and a bright smile. "We'll have a special dinner made."

"Actually, I'd love to cook for you tonight. That would perk me up some. My last six birthdays I've cooked for my family, and since I can't cook for them, I'd be honored if you let me cook for you. My first efforts weren't so grand, but they choked those meals down with good humor. I got a lot better since then so I wouldn't be torturing them."

"If you don't like torturing your loved ones then you shouldn't run your mouth so much," Kurogane snapped.

Fai gave him a mocking pout. "Just for that, no cake for you."

"Cake? What's that?"

Fai gave him a devious smirk. "You'll see."

To be continued