Rifiuto: Non Miriena

He's fallen in love with you, and he's afraid you don't feel the same way. He's backing away before he gets hurt. What he doesn't realize, is that he's hurting you in the process. Give him space, let him get his head together. Don't pressure him. That will just push him away further and faster. Keep doing what you've been doing all along, keep the familiar routine, and give him time to figure it out. He'll make the right decision. If he doesn't, then you learn to live without him.

Ziva looked over her shoulder; Tim slept peacefully beside her. She sighed softly. Gibbs would be disappointed in her. For the last six weeks, they'd been keeping up appearances at work, going to the doctor's appointments, the dinners, the shower- which was last week- and birthing classes, but at night, they would fall into bed together. She was trying to give Tim space, trying to let him get his head together, but it was difficult. She didn't want to live without him, she knew that now. She didn't want their baby to live without her father, and she was terrified that Tim would flee, leaving her and their daughter alone, breaking her heart in the process.

A moment passed, before she sat up, placing her hands on her lower back. She took a deep breath, reaching down to caress her round belly.

Thirty-two weeks.

She was just starting her eighth month. "One more month to go, Bug." She whispered, glancing back at Tim. "I only hope Daddy decides to stay." With some difficulty, she got up, going to the bathroom. She'd just started to waddle, a fact that annoyed her to no end. Add in that Gibbs had put her on desk duty until the birth, and she was downright pissed. But there was nothing she could do about it, at least, not until the baby was born.

They had a list of names they were working on narrowing down, and their birthing classes- which they'd started at twenty-eight weeks- were going smoothly, but still, she had this niggling sensation in the back of her mind that Tim would follow through and leave as soon as he heard the baby's first cry.


Tim looked up as Ziva waddled into the kitchen. Though Tony picked on her, Tim had to admit that he found it adorable. She was carrying his baby, after all. "How're you feeling?" He asked, setting a glass of orange juice in front of her. She sighed.

"Like a bleached whale." He furrowed a brow, before realizing.

"Beached whale." She nodded, huffing.

"Yes, that too."

"We have birthing class this morning, remember? Gibbs already knows, so no need to go into work until after class." Ziva sighed.

"And while you get to go out in the field, I will be stuck at my desk, doing paperwork." Tim rolled his eyes, saying,

"It's only for a few more weeks. And then she'll be here and you'll have a beautiful baby girl to raise." Ziva's eyes misted with tears. She hadn't missed the singular pronoun, and it hurt. A moment passed, before she nodded.

"Yes, you are right, Tim. Only a few more weeks."


"Hello Daisy." The blonde receptionist that worked part-time at the birth center- at a majority of hospitals and birth centers and free clinics, come to think of it- looked up, eyes lighting when she saw Ziva.

"You're here for class, Ziva?" The Israeli nodded, laying a hand on her back. "Go on in."


"And take a deep breath, hold it for a few seconds, and then slowly exhale. Good." The birthing instructor looked around the room; women in various stages of pregnancy sat around in a circle, with their partners by their sides. A moment passed, before she asked, "Are there any questions, anything you might be curious about?" Silence filled the room, before Ziva raised her hand. "Yes, Ziva."

The Israeli glanced around, licking her lips nervously before asking, "How... how long does labor last? Usually?" A couple of the other women chuckled, and the woman gave Ziva a warm smile.

"It depends. Sometimes, labor can last a few hours, or a few days."

"Is this your first?" The woman on Ziva's left asked. She glanced at the redhead, and nodded. "Boy or girl?" Ziva glanced back at Tim, who squeezed her hand.

"Girl." The woman nodded, giving her a smile.

"Don't worry, the first is always the most horrifying, mainly because they make it seem like labor is this horrifying 'Creature from the Black Lagoon' experience, but it's really not. It's... amazing and beautiful, and... every moment is worth it once you realize your baby is coming into the world."

"Black Lagoon?" Ziva asked, glancing back at Tim. He waved it away, with a muttered, "Movie reference." She nodded, turning back to the class.

"It gets easier as you have children, the first is always the hardest." A petite blonde added.

"And birth is... quite a bonding experience for both you and your husband-" A young-looking brunette put in.

"Oh no, we are not married." Ziva cut in. "We are partners. Friends. Having a baby." The other couples shared glances, unsure of what to say. Ziva sank back in Tim's embrace, embarrassment coloring her cheeks. The instructor, realizing how uncomfortable the silence had gotten, spoke up.

"Now, have you all thought about your birthing plans? Whether you are going to have a hospital birth or use a midwife?" Ziva slowly raised her hand again.

"We are going to use a midwife." She said, biting her lip. "Is it... okay to use a midwife for the first birth?" The instructor gave her a warm smile.

"It is always okay to use a midwife, Ziva. Sometimes, you find out that a natural birth using a midwife is safer than a hospital birth."