Despite the fact that I have exams tomorrow and it is already long past midnight (I am SO in trouble tomorrow), I still uploaded this chapter. I sincerely want to apologize for the last chapter. I didn't know that chapter was so confusing! I am so sorry, so this chapter serves as an apology. Hopefully you all will like it. Oh, and to rocktheroxie and iluvedward4ever, you better like this chapter. Hahaha...
Chapter 16: Suffocating
I do not love you except because I love you;
I go from loving to not loving you,
From waiting to not waiting for you
My heart moves from cold to fire.
I love you only because it's you the one I love;
I hate you deeply, and hating you
Bend to you, and the measure of my changing love for you
Is that I do not see you but love you blindly.
Maybe January light will consume
My heart with its cruel
Ray, stealing my key to true calm.
In this part of the story I am the one who
Dies, the only one, and I will die of love because I love you,
Because I love you, Love, in fire and blood.
--Pablo Neruda, Sonnet LXVI: I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You
"Adele?"
I opened my eyes. I was lying in my own bed with the curtains pulled over the windows, keeping the sunlight out of my room and making it dark. I turned slightly to look at the person sitting on a chair by the bed.
I smiled; an up curl of the lips.
"Hey there,"
My voice came out in a sexy purr. Even in the dimly lit room, I can see Dominic's eyes wide with surprise. I reached a hand out to him,"Come here,"
Dominic stood up from his seat and leaned down, "How are you feeling?" His face creased with worry, making him looked human when I know that he is not. I shrugged my shoulders, "Oh, I feel very fine, Dominic." I drawled at his name and there was a momentary spark of desire in his eyes. Truth is, I felt a little light-headed, as if my mind was clouded and I couldn't think properly. But I didn't tell him that; I have my mind set on something else.
Dominic touched my forehead with the back of his palm, his hands cold against my skin, "Are you sure you are fine?"
I smiled seductively at him, "And why would I be not fine when I have a very delicious-looking man nursing me?"
Dominic shook his head but I caught a glimpse of his smile, "You are definitely not fine." When Dominic leaned away, something pulled at my heartstrings; some sort of disappointed feelings and like a child, I pouted. However, something snapped inside of me when he said, "I think I will go call the others."
Grab him!
My hand shoot out and caught him by his wrist. Dominic turned back to look at me with a raised eyebrow. "Don't go…" I pleaded at him, my eyes never leaving his. Dominic suddenly tensed up, his eyes turned to slits and something inhuman stared out behind his crystal blue eyes. He cleared his throat, "I think I better be going--"
I didn't let him finish what he wanted to say. With both of my hands, I pulled Dominic by the collar of his black sleeveless hoody roughly towards me and crashed his lips to mine. I could feel Dominic stiffen against me but I didn't break away, instead I kissed him even harder, urging him to kiss me back because I know he wants to. But when he still didn't respond to my kiss, I felt disappointed and broke the kiss. I backed away a little and saw Dominic's expression that made me want to shed tears; his eyes were hard and his lips set in a tight line, as if he was controlling his anger. He looked as if he hated me. Oh my god, what have I done? I asked myself, suddenly feeling very confused, why had I kissed him in the first place? Now he hates me…I just made him hate me again.
"I…I am so sorry, what was I thinking! Ha, I bet you are surprised! This is too hilarious," I was no longer looking at Dominic anymore as soon as I felt the tears threatening to spill. I looked down at my hands, feeling so stupid and hurt. Did he hated me so much that he had to look like that when I kissed him? "I am so stupid…"
My words were cut off when a pair of hands grabbed at my arms and I find myself being kissed passionately by Dominic. His kiss was so fiery, so passionate as if he had been holding it all in…had he? My mind went blank, surprised that he had actually wanted to kiss me and my heart fluttered. I kissed him back and when I did, Dominic's kisses became hungrier, like he was trying to swallow me whole. My mind was spinning and I could feel this electrifying shock running through my veins. I pressed my body hard against his, willing for our body to mold together. I heard a low grumble at the back of Dominic's throat but chuckled into his lips as I kissed him harder. I pressed hard against him until the both of us fall onto the bed; our lips not leaving each other's. When we actually break the kiss; Dominic was the one that pulled away, obviously not delighting to me at all; said in an uneven voice that made him sounded like he just ran a mile, "Adele, please stop; I don't think we should be doing this."
Don't listen to him; you know he wants it.
I made an attempt to snort but failed miserably so I just rolled my eyes at him. I sat up, with his body underneath me and licked my lips. I didn't had the chance to give Dominic a good look over earlier because I was lying down but now that I did; wow. Dominic is very hot. Young boyish good looks with tousled bright blond hair and clear icy blue eyes. So maybe now he might look too young for me but who cares; I licked my lips again, suddenly feeling the very need to continue kissing those very yummy lips of his. He is so mine…
Yes, give him to me.
In a swift movement, I unzipped Dominic's sleeveless hoody, leaving his very fine abs bared for me to see. His face might look like a child's but his body--oh, yum. "Adele--" Dominic opened his mouth to say something but I silenced him with a kiss, my hand trailing up his chest and felt his breath hitched up.
I broke the kiss with a smug smile on my lips and started little butterfly kisses down his throat and chest. Even though Dominic didn't have the need to breathe, his breath was coming out rather unsteadily. That excited me even more. I continued until I reached the end of his bared flesh and the start of his inky blue skinny jeans. I grunted a little when that piece of clothing disturbed my worship to his body and with two hands, I undid the button so I could continue on. Suddenly Dominic's hands were on mine. "Adele," his voice came out in ragged breaths, his bangs a little sweaty and falling in on his eyes that screamed desire, "stop it."
You know you don't want to.
"No," I said and kissed him.
Dominic tried to break the kiss but found it impossible when he was the one lying down on the bed. Between kisses, he grunted, "They can hear us!"
"Screw them," I said, deepening the kiss and pressing my body harder against him until I could feel him hard against me. Kissing Dominic was rather exciting; his kisses was passionate and hungry, but in the same time his touch was careful as if he was worried that he would break me. Not to mention he sends this tingling electric sensation that my body could not resist but obey.
Give me death, yes, give it to me.
I suddenly felt lightheaded; something in my head was screaming at me to stop whatever I was doing, but I ignored it. Dominic wanted this anyway, he is asking me to give it to him. How can I not? I was still on top of Dominic with his hands caressing my back, mimicking the way my hands are moving teasingly on his chest. I removed one hand and it reached behind the pillow to pull out the seemingly familiar-looking long machete. I kept my eyes on Dominic while he kept his shut, his lips still trailing kisses down my throat…
My bedroom door suddenly flew open with a loud bang. Standing there looking very deadly was the man I have longed to meet--Julian. I was shocked at first to find him standing by my bedroom door. Julian looked very angry; his emerald green eyes were glowering and he growled, a sound no human was supposed to be able to produce. My mind was spinning and somehow I couldn't think properly. That probably explains why I don't feel scared or guilty, but my rational mind was telling me that I am as guilty as a kid getting caught with his hands in the cookie jar.
"What's wrong? Is Adele awake already?" Someone's voice rang from the corridor and several footsteps could be heard. When Julian didn't answer them, a few question was raised again before heads started to pop out at the doorway. A few shocked gasp and a silent whistle later, Dominic who was beneath me hissed at Julian, obviously didn't appreciate the disturbance.
Do it; do it now!
I raised the machete in a swift movement, ready to strike it down into the heart of the unexpected Dominic. I could already imagining the thankful face of Dominic when I end his suffering life. I was smiling when I brought down the machete in my hands. There was surprise in his eyes but I didn't understand it. Dominic will love you more, someone kept whispering that in my mind again and again, Dominic will love you more.
Someone shouted and in a blink of an eye, I was grabbed painfully by my arms and peeled away from Dominic. I kicked my legs and screamed at the people who grabbed me. Dominic was cursing some unintelligent words loudly as he pulled the machete out of his body, blood pouring out of the gash wound furiously and creating a pool of black stain on the covers.
"Nooooo!" I screamed when I saw the wound on Dominic's chest started to heal. I failed his request; Dominic is going to hate me! I screamed and struggled in my captors grasp, trying to free myself from their iron grip but failed; they are too strong.
"What the bloody hell was that?" someone shouted beside me. Dominic was getting up from the bed and stared with full anger at me, his eyes a fury red. I felt shivers run down my spine; why is he so angry? Is it because I failed to give him peace?
"Which part are you talking about? The part where they were having sex or the part where she stabbed him?" I recognized Julian's voice amid my screaming and struggling.
Dominic hissed at Julian, his fangs bared. "We haven't done anything yet,"
"Oh? Was that nothing? I was sure you guys were very busy smoldering each other with your lips!" Julian's voice was getting louder and louder with each word. He looked damn frightening right now.
Dominic was about to say something back at Julian but Grace cut him off, "Will the two of you just shut the fuck up? Something is obviously wrong with Adele! She is screaming like we just killed her favorite teddy bear and she just stabbed Dominic with the same goddamn machete from the fight with Victor so will the two of you act like the adults you all are supposed to be and suck up!"
Everyone went silent except for me who was still busy trying to free myself from the two captors. My body felt sore and was aching all over but I kept kicking and screaming. I have to free myself from them so I could finish what I was asked for; to end Dominic's life for him.
Dominic turned his eyes on me, his crystal blue eyes filled with so much of hatred it made my stomach churn. "Did you hate me so much that you would seduce me just to kill me?" He sounded so angry…so hurt. My heart squeezed when I saw the look on his face, he looked as if I had betrayed him. I wanted to say that I was just doing what he asked of me but Dominic turned away and stalked out of the room, not even turning around once to look me.
Grace stood in front of me and the two captors, who turned out to be the twins, tighten their grip on to my arms to prevent me from kicking the werewolf. I couldn't free myself from these idiotic pair of twins so I will just have to vent my anger on her. When Grace leaned in to take a sniff at me, I let out an inhuman growl. She looked startled but continued to lean in further to smell me, which puzzled me at why did she even need to do so; doesn't she already know who I am? Grace sudden draw back with a low growl attracted everyone's attention in the room.
"What is it?" Fragrance asked, she looked somewhat afraid of me. Nathaniel lingered behind her, his eyes not meeting mine. Grace wrinkled her nose like she was trying to get rid of some bad smell, "She smelled like a vampire," when she saw how Christopher went stiff beside her she looked apologetic, "Baby, you know I didn't mean it that way!" Christopher wasn't one to put on an attitude but he had his arms folded across his chest, looking the slightest offended and not forgiving. Grace threw her hands to the air in frustration. It looks like a couple argument is brewing; hmm.
"So what you wanted to say is that she has the scent of a vampire when she is not a vampire, am I right?" Sebastian quickly jumped into the conversation. Grace turned to look at him, "Yes, that was exactly what I meant." And she threw Christopher a cold glare.
"She drank a lot of vampire blood…could it be the cause of it?" Nathaniel voiced up from the back; he has been awfully quiet the whole time. Grace shook her head, her hair following the motion, "To actually hurt Dominic like that? And what about that machete? How on earth did it get here?"
"Let me smell her," Christopher said as he took a step forward and received a threatening growl from Julian. I had completely forgotten about him until he made that inhuman sound from the back of his throat. "Relax, I am just doing it to see if I recognize the smell. And if you have failed to notice, I already have a wife," Christopher made a hand gesture towards Grace. Grace looked happy when Christopher said that; I got a feeling that the previous brewing argument would be forgotten.
Christopher leaned into me, closed his eyes and took a long breath in. His instant draw back and horrified look somehow confirm the other sibling's thoughts. "It really is him, isn't it?" Sebastian asked, his voiced laced with anger.
Christopher sighed before taking a few steps back, "I am afraid it really is his doing…"
I was suddenly feeling so entirely mentally and physically drained out that I was no longer struggling against their grasp but leaning against them for support. I didn't say anything nor did I even bother to try to understand what are they talking about. I was just too tired to even think. My eyelids were dropping when I saw Julian walking towards me and growled at the twins to hands off. They let go of me almost immediately and Julian carried me bridal style out of the room.
I blacked out before I got the chance to ask him where is he bringing me.
Victor bit down on my throat. And he bit hard. I screamed like I have never screamed before; I could feel the flesh tearing and the blood gushing from the wound. I could hear my scream going into gurgling noise as blood started to come out from my mouth. I could hear Victor drinking in mouthfuls of my blood like I was the river he is quenching his thirst in. I could just stare at the ceiling as I felt my body growing cold and Victor still feeding on me.
The last thing I saw was Victor's bloody victorious smile. And then it turned to a scowl. "You incompetent little bitch!" Victor hissed angrily at me and I was surprised to find myself standing unhurt at the same empty hall where I was kidnapped. "You failed my plan!"
Realization dawned on me. I felt anger building up in the pit of my stomach. Even though I have to admit that Victor still scares the living daylights out of me, I was way pass pissed at him for what he made me did to care about my fear. "So it was you who was thwarting with my mind!" I hissed at him through gritted teeth.
Victor sneered at me, "You useless bitch," Suddenly he was right in front of me, "I will make you pay for this!" And then he lashed out at me, tearing my throat once again and the pain resurface.
I woke up screaming. Screaming and clawing at the person who was trying to hold me down. Panic rise in me when the person tighten his grip on the both of my arms, and I screamed even more. "Adele! Calm down! It's me!" When I did not stop screaming and clawing for my arms to be released, the person hugged me. I was in an even more shock when the person hugged me and made an effort to push that person back, but the person didn't even bulge an inch.
Eventually I grew tired of struggling so I just lay limp in that person's embrace. I had previously refused to open my eyes in fear it will be Victor that I will be facing but after steadying my heart rate, I dared myself to open my eyes and came face to face with Julian. Obviously my efforts of steadying my heart beat was gone to waste because as soon as I saw him, my heart rate hitched up; again.
Julian the werewolf, was still as handsome as ever. Or maybe even hotter now that he looked more matured, his features sharper and his black hair long until his shoulders. His emerald green eyes are still the amazing color and he still smells of a mixture between mint and pine.
"Hi," I said shyly, suddenly very aware of our bodies distance. Julian smiled back at me, "Hey," I tried to wriggle out of his hug but of course he didn't let me and I gave up trying. I couldn't lean into him anymore since I was starting to feel very conscious of it so I just sat at a very uncomfortable pose.
"Do I make you feel that uncomfortable?"
I looked up at him startled, only to remember that werewolves can read auras. Damn them and their smelling ability. Julian sounded hurt, annoyed and angry at the same time. Well, looks like someone is feeling more emotion than I am. "No--"
That is when Julian kissed me. Immediately out of reflex, I pulled back.
"Does it disgust you that much that a werewolf is touching you? Back then you let me make love to you and now, I can't even kiss you? Well, I can imagine that after sleeping with a blood-sucker--" Julian's words reminded me of the night before and a scarlet red shade made it's way up my face. But it wasn't only embarrassment that I was feeling at that moment, I was getting pissed too. What I did previously wasn't on my own; Victor was fueling me! And I haven't even slept with Dominic yet! His words made me feel like I am a whore and is cheating on him and that insulted me. Wait, was I even dating him in the first place? I don't think so.
"Excuse me--" I scooted myself away from him, this time he didn't stop me, and I glared at him, "what was that supposed to mean?"
Julian looked like he was about to say something but he threw his hands in the air instead with a frustrated groan, "Look, Adele--" I didn't even wait for him to finish what he wanted to say, I didn't even want to listen anymore. "Hey!" I was upset and if he is smart enough, he would shut up and let me leave. But obviously no; and I thought wolves are supposed to be smart and sensitive.
Julian grabbed me by my wrist and spun me around; only to receive a very angry hiss from me. "Don't touch me, Julian." I hissed angrily in his face. Usually Julian is taller than I am and it makes face to face argument hard but since he was still on the bed, things are so much easier. I had the enjoyment of watching Julian's expression turned from shock to hurt and then anger.
Then he did something I didn't expect him to do; he pulled me down so I would be on my knees and he grabbed my chin none too kindly so I would face him. I winced in pain and he soften his grip but didn't let go. "I am the Alpha here, Adele; you listen to me and not the other way around, you understand?" Now he was being just plain annoying.
I sneered at him, "You don't know me well enough then, Julian. It is either we compromise or it is nothing; and that obviously doesn't work with you, does it?" I ripped my chin free from him and stood up but he caught my wrist captive again. I whirled on him and was about to snap at him but he cut me short by asking, "What is wrong with you?"
I raised an eyebrow at him, now what is that supposed to mean?
"Why did you start sleeping with a--a blood-sucker!"
Ok, now that is overboard. I glowered at him, my teeth grinding in uncontrollable anger, "Excuse me if I am mistaken, but the last time I mentally checked my memory, our relationship status is zero! I can sleep with anyone or fuck a vampire for that matter and you shouldn't give a damn about it because you and I are not anything!"
I screamed at him and regretted it immediately when I saw the anger on his face. It was downright scary. "Oh really?" he said through gritted teeth as he took a step closer towards me and grabbed a lock of my hair. Before I could protest, he crushed his lips against mine and forced his tongue in. I tried to push him away but that made him grab onto me even tighter. I tighten my hand into a fist and hit him by his shoulders as hard as possible, hoping that he would release me. But the more I struggled, the harder he kisses me. I can already feel the tears brimming. The kiss was nothing like the ones we used to had back then; it was rough, painful and suffocating. However, that burning sensation I felt that night in Julian's arms sixteen years ago started again and I melted under his kiss unconsciously.
But as soon as the sensation starts, Julian pulled away abruptly; leaving me a little confused and scattering for breaths. I couldn't stand any longer as my knees had turned to jelly-o and without support, I slip to the ground. "So you and I are not anything, huh?" Julian's voice was bitter and giving me the one last cold glance, stormed out of the room. A tear escaped down my cheek but I didn't bother wiping it off, there is no one else in the room anymore except for me. I sat on the floor feeling very pathetic, angry, scared…and hurt.
Julian was terrifyingly intimidating today. "I am the Alpha here, Adele; you listen to me and not the other way around, you understand?" He was never like this before; did becoming the Alpha changed him? I could feel shivers running down my spine as soon as I thought of Julian's cold heartless look. It was a look I know too well of and never expected him to have one. He became this scary and his touch was so rough. I touched my lips and my heart ache; even his kiss was this rough…
I can feel another tear threatening to fall so I raised my head to look at the ceilings instead. I caused him to act this way. If I hadn't said such hurtful words, Julian wouldn't have acted that way.
"Did you hate me so much that you would seduce me just to kill me?"
My face heated up almost immediately at the recollection of that memory. What in the devil's pants was wrong with me that I was so daring enough to 'attack' Dominic this shamefully. Oh wait; it was Victor's fault. But I still can't believe that I actually kissed him. Thousands of butterflies danced in the pit of my stomach when I replayed back the scene in my head. It was downright embarrassing that I don't think I can face Dominic anymore without blushing. I hid my face in my palms, but Dominic's expression before he left the room made my heart feels like it was cruelly squeezed. He looked so angry and hurt…
I sighed to the ceilings.
I don't know what scares me more now; the possibility that Victor is still alive or the Julian that have became so frightening…
…or the fact that I actually enjoyed kissing Dominic.
So, how is it? Satisfied? This is my first time writing scenes like this so...*blush*...hopefully it doesn't sound weird. Now go and REVIEW! *laughs* I am siting here wondering whether I can get at least 20 reviews for this chapter? *smiles innocently* Remember to tell me what you think! Hope to see you on the next chapter!
