OMG this story got nominated for a Rizzle award...WHAAAAAT! Whomever nominated this story...HELL YEAH! I seriously cried like a bitch baby when I found out! Anyway...I don't anticipate winning...there are sooo many awesome stories nominated...most of them I follow myself. But it's awesome to think that someone out there likes my work enough to think I'm worthy of standing with the greats. Anyway...this is another stupid long chapter. It flip flops between Jane's POV and Maura's POV in the middle so pay attention. Also it gets really sweet at the end...but don't get to comfortable. I'll be introducing the antagonist soon...I can't wait. I hope you guys enjoy the chapter...let me know what you think...your ideas are what fuel the story. And with all that being said...here we go!

Jane

"I kill little rat dog...DIABLO!" Consuela screeched running around the apartment after Franklin Thomas with a kitchen knife in her hand.

I ran after her trying not to laugh.

Franklin Thomas was scurrying around the apartment yipping and barking in that high-pitched little puppy voice of his playing his favorite game of "Piss of Miss Connie,"

I'd just come back from visiting with Angela again to find piles of freshly washed laundry scattered all over the entire apartment. I knew little Franklin Thomas was to blame for the chaos. I'd stepped out the elevator to Miss Connie's screeches and wails of fury. Franklin Thomas ran right past me with his tongue hanging out of his mouth, and if I didn't know better I would think he was smiling. There was a pair of pink underwear wrapped around this back leg as he ran past and I'd burst out laughing. Little Franklin Thomas and I were of a same mind. Our new favorite way to amuse ourselves was frustrating Consuela as much as humanly possible.

Ever since I'd opened the box to find Franklin Thomas inside I'd been happier than I ever have in my life. My puppy was my buddy, and I loved his curly brown fur and his playful temperament. He followed me around everywhere in the apartment, except when he was busy infuriating Consuela. He seemed to love crouching down and getting a running jump at the drapes and biting them, he'd swing back and forth off the drapes by his teeth growling and tearing at them trying to pull them down. Ever since the first time he'd done that and ripped the entire set of drapes from the wall it was his favorite thing ever. Consuela had melted into a screaming screeching mess and I had laughed so hard my stomach hurt and tears poured out of my eyes. I laughed even harder when Consuela collapsed into a heap on the floor covered in drapes when she tried to put them back up. Franklin Thomas had run out from under the coffee table and attacked the drapes again wrapped up around Consuela's body. Franklin Thomas yipped and barked as Consuela screeched and cursed trying to untangle herself from the pile on the floor. You should have seen it...it was freaking hysterical.

Consuela had taken to calling Franklin Thomas 'Diablo' and I couldn't disagree with her reasoning. He was a little devil dog, but I loved him so much. Besides it wasn't me he terrorized, it was always Consuela or the other hotel employees that dared enter the apartment. Franklin Thomas had taken to believing that the apartment was his territory and everyone else besides me was there for his amusement and mine. He'd pee'd...actually pee'd on a bell boys shoes yesterday and this morning he jumped on a different bell boy and knocked his serving tray of breakfast out of his hands to clatter and scatter all over the floor in a cacophony of noise and chaos. The bell boy almost cried as he crawled around on his hands and knees trying to gather up the remnants of my breakfast. Franklin Thomas was overjoyed at all the goodies scattered around for his delight. He ran around the bell boy in circles growling at him and gobbling down bits of bacon and toast and snapped at the poor boys fingers every time he tried to grab something that Franklin Thomas had decided was his own. After I managed to stop laughing I'd helped the bell boy clean up the mess, Consuela was busy screeching and hurling curses about "Diablo" behind us and I sort of felt guilty. Poor Michelle, the hotel manager, had come up to deliver Maura's mail herself and she had been run out of the apartment screaming when Franklin Thomas jumped up and grabbed the mail from her hands and started tearing it to pieces right in front of her. That dog never failed to make me laugh.

I was a little worried about what Maura would think of Franklin Thomas when she finally met him face to face. When Maura left Monday her apartment had been quiet and empty. Now it was nothing of the sort. Between Franklin Thomas' chaos, Consuela's constant screaming and antagonizing, and Albert's over the top redecorating, this apartment was nothing like it was Monday morning when Maura left. I know Maura got me Franklin Thomas so I wouldn't be so lonely without her, but still...I hoped she didn't live to regret it. Even though she and I talked constantly, I still had a feeling Maura had no idea what she was coming home to.

"DIABLO!" Consuela screeched as she chased down Franklin Thomas.

"Stop...STOP! I yelled between laughs.

Franklin Thomas was impossibly fast and Consuela never caught him, but it didn't stop her from trying and it didn't stop Franklin Thomas from antagonizing her. He was running around the living room in circles with a pair of Maura's underwear wrapped around his leg barking and yipping in his excitement. Consuela's short chubby body waddled by huffing and cursing and stabbing at the air with the knife. Her cheeks were red and her hair was falling out if it's normally neat bun and was clinging to her sweaty face. Consuela looked beside herself with fury and frustration.

"You bad motha," Consuela said turning around and glaring at me angrily pointing the knife at me thrusting it forward with every word she spoke.

Her eyes were on fire and I noticed a very large red stain on her usually spotless maids uniform. I wondered how that happened, I had a feeling it had something to do with Franklin Thomas.

I'd been gone all day. I was busy with Angela. I'd gotten to hold her for the first time yesterday and I'd spent the entire day today with my baby cradled in my arms. I'd even gotten to talk to Maura on video chat while I sat with Angela earlier this afternoon. Maura had a bell boy deliver me a lap top this morning for the sole purpose of me being able to video chat with her so she could see Angela and I together. I called Maura as soon as I opened the box, saw what was inside and read the letter.

"But Maura you'll be home tonight, you didn't have to send me this thing it's too much." I whined at her on the phone.

Maura only chuckled but didn't back down.

"Jane I might be really late, I still have so much to do here before I go on leave...I might not even make it home tonight and I just want to see you and your baby," she insisted

My heart broke when she said she might not even make it home tonight. I'd been looking forward to seeing her all week. I think subconsciously I was counting down the very seconds until I'd get to see Maura's beautiful face again. I even had dreams of her stepping off the elevator into the apartment and me flying into her arms, picking her up, spinning her around, and telling her how much I missed her. One time I even dreamed that I kissed her. That was a weird dream.

I'd awoken with a start sitting up straight and covered with a cold sweat. Franklin Thomas woke up too and started licking me all about the face and mouth area like he enjoyed doing so much. That was the weirdest dream I'd ever had...but it wasn't a nightmare...far from it actually. I'd never, ever had a dream like that about another woman...I hadn't had a dream like that period in freaking years. I felt all sweaty and my insides were on fire and my skin was tingling. I had to get up and drink a glass of cold water to calm myself down. My underwear was wet and my nerves were frazzled.

I didn't want to admit what else had been going on between Maura and me in that dream...I just flipped on the TV and petted Franklin Thomas curled up in my lap. The other part of that dream was just...it was making me feel rather faint. Maura actually called me shortly after I woke from that dream. I'd squeaked and stuttered through the entire conversation trying not to admit to myself what the sound of Maura's voice was doing to me. Maura inquired many times about what was bothering me. I lied and told her I had a nightmare. I certainly couldn't tell her the truth. Even still, I missed Maura three times as much as I thought I would and hearing that she might not be coming home at all made my heart wrench.

"Maura...you said you'd be home tonight!" I found myself pouting into the phone.

I thought I heard Maura sigh. She did sound extremely tired, she always sounded tired when I talk to her. But Maura always tried to be so stoic and brave and would talk to me anyway until I started yawning and my eyes started drooping. Then she'd scold me for not getting enough sleep when it was really her that needed to slow down and take a break.

"Honey I'm just really busy. I can't leave my lab and my staff in disarray. Also I don't want to fly with a tired pilot. If I leave the office to late I'll just let him sleep through the night and I'll leave first thing in the morning I promise. Until then...I'd like to see you with Angela. It will make the rest of the day so much easier." Maura said kindly.

I sighed again but conceded. I missed her, and I wanted her with me...but I'd do as she asked and set up the video chat thingy on the lap top so she could watch Angela and I. It was the very least I could do after all.

Several hours ago at the hospital

I had tears in my eyes as I cradled little Angela in my arms. Her body was warm and her breathing was steady but her eyes were closed and she was still hooked up to several machines and had little probes stuck all over her chest. I hated the feeding tube Angela had, but at least she was eating well...even if it was through a damn tube. Angela looked so frail and vulnerable, despite that fact that Addison assured me she was doing very well and was growing more and more strong by the day. I tried to believe her, but as a mother...it was just hard seeing my baby like that.

There was at least a bit more color in her cheeks than yesterday. Yesterday had been awful actually when I got to hold Angela for the first time. I'd dissolved into tears when Addison first placed Angela in my arms and she'd had to spend twenty minutes comforting me. She tried to convince me that at least she wasn't in the incubation chamber anymore and out of the infant ICU. But still...still I cried and cried holding my injured frail baby in my arms. Angela was still being sedated mildly to keep her from pulling at everything attached to her body and she wasn't very responsive to my voice. Tears streamed down my face all day yesterday as I held her and rocked and sang to little Angela.

I didn't tell Maura how hard it had been when we talked yesterday evening. I didn't want her to know about all my pain. Maura seemed oddly sensitive to my distress and I hated adding extra stress on her when I knew she was under so much pressure of her own at work and was doing everything under the sun already to care for me. But I had a sneaking feeling Addison had told her about my tears anyway. I kind of thought that was the reason of the sudden delivery of the lap top this morning.

I wanted to be angry with Maura for buying something else for me but...it was nearly impossible to protest with her about those sorts of things. Maura would always blow it off and assure me with a smile that she was happy to do it and that she cared for me. If I protested to hard sometimes Maura would even get a little angry. Not as angry as she did with Tyler or that poor social worker, but I saw a glimmer of that shadow behind her eye sometimes. I didn't want to make her mad that's for damn sure...that's for DAMN sure! Besides, Maura really was sweet...somewhere deep down I knew she was telling me the truth when she said she cared for me. I just wish I didn't feel like Maura's only way of showing love was throwing money around.

"Can you see her Maura?" I asked looking up from my baby at the lap top.

I could see Maura's beautiful face as clear as day on the screen. She was in her office and was wearing a pair of scrubs. She'd just finished an autopsy and looked very tired but still a smile covered her face. I thought I even saw tears in her eyes that she was trying to blink away.

"She's...she's so beautiful Jane...she looks just like you," Maura said in an unsteady voice.

Was she really crying? I smiled hard looking back at my baby in my arms. Angela really was beautiful...even hooked up to every machine in the hospital.

"Addison says she'll have the feeding tube for at least another week, her esophagus is healing slowly but...but her body is getting stronger. That's what Addison said at least," I sighed looking at my sleeping baby.

I prayed everything Addison said was true...I couldn't wait to take my baby home to the ridiculous nursery Albert was designing for her.

"She'll need to have the feeding tube until she can swallow properly and without it causing her pain. It's dangerous trying to gauge those kinds of things with infants. Angela can't tell us if she's hurting except through crying. If they take the feeding tube out too soon and her esophagus hasn't healed enough she could end up choking on her food...even on just formula. I don't want Angela to have anymore damage to her esophagus...it could even affect her vocal cords if she suffers more trauma. I'd rather that Addison left the feeding tube in until the day before Angela is released from the hospital so there is less of a chance of us having to put it back in. Addison doesn't seem to think it's necessary...but I'll speak with her about it when I get back. I don't want to take any chances," Maura said smiling at me.

I looked up at her. Something about Maura in those scrubbs...hmmmm! Her hair was pulled back in a tight pony tail and she was sitting back in her office chair casually. I'd seen Maura in all manner of gorgeous designer attire, she was always beautiful...but something about those scrubs made it hard for me to look away from her. She looked so...so freaking sexy. I thought about me walking in on Maura naked before she left for Boston. I blushed hard and turned away from her image on the screen. I couldn't think about all that with my baby in my arms.

Maura must have noticed me blush though.

"What's so funny?" she inquired.

I blushed harder knowing I had been caught. I hoped I hadn't been staring at her cleavage area, I don't know why I seemed to think about her breast so much. What the hell was happening to me?

"Nothing?" I squeaked.

I tried to cover with a cough again.

"You seem amused by something," Maura pushed.

"I was just thinking about how happy I am you're coming home today," I said truthfully.

That wasn't a lie at all. I was happy about seeing Maura. I was more happy that I might just get to sleep next to her again. I loved sleeping with Franklin Thomas and his puppy kisses on my face all night long. But I still dreamed of what it might be like to fall asleep with Maura's kisses instead. I shook my head trying not to think to hard about all that.

"I'm still not sure if I'll make it Jane," Maura said sadly.

I looked up at her frowning. I didn't want to hear that...I didn't even want to consider that. Maura's eyes were heavy with weariness and her smile was a bit forced but I still decided to play dirty. I turned my body so that Angela's face could be seen clearly by the tiny little computer camera.

"Angela...look baby. It's Maura..." I cooed softly into my child's ear but still loud enough that Maura could hear what I was saying, "...it's your daddy!" I said kissing Angela's forehead lightly several times.

"Daddy's coming home today and she can't wait to see you," I said running my fingers through Angela's soft dark curls.

I looked back at the computer screen, Maura had the weirdest smile on her face I'd ever seen. I knew I wasn't misinterpreting the unfallen tears shining in her eyes though. I could see those as plain as day. I'd never...ever seen Maura look so happy before. She looked between me and Angela with hazy shining eyes full of love and insurmountable joy.

"Daddy?" was all Maura said in a shaky trembling voice.

I smiled at Maura and at my daughter, I felt tears welling up in my own eyes...yet again!

"You are daddy Maura. You're the only and the best daddy Angela's ever known. You saved her life...and you saved me! You've given her everything...the best of everything a baby could need. She has her own room, and her own awesome toys, and Albert even made the spare den into a play room for her." I said rolling my eyes at the fiasco of fluttering gayness and snapping fingers that whole thing had been.

"She's even got health insurance and her mommy has a job now. A real job that Angela can be proud of instead of her mother spreading her legs for strange men just so she can eat. If you aren't the best daddy in the world I don't know who is. You foot the bill and I give all the love," I said kissing my daughters face a half-dozen times again.

When I looked up tears were streaming down Maura's face unchecked and unchallenged.

"I can...I can give her love too Jane." Maura said trying to smile behind her tears.

Her voice was so shaky and her face was so honest and beautiful my heart melted completely. I smiled between my own tears. I found myself wishing desperately that I wasn't looking at Maura on a computer. I wished she was here. I wished she was standing over me...me and Angela. I wished I could look over my shoulder and see Maura's beautiful face smiling down at me and my daughter and feel the powerful air of love and protection that I thought I was seeing in her face now. I wished I could hear her whisper soft words in my ear and soft words to my daughter. I wished I could feel her fingers run through my hair as I cradled Angela in my arms. I wished she would deal with the doctors and the lawyers and I was left free to be only with my baby.

Maura was a natural with the details and the facts other professionals like her often peppered conversation with. I hadn't the knowledge to fully understand everything that was said to me by people far above my station. I did my best to retain as much information as I could, and with the help of Maura and Google I managed to make it through the day but still...I wished Maura was here.

I just wanted Maura next to me...I wanted her next to me forever. If the last thing I felt and saw in my life was Maura's smile and Angela in my arms...my life would be complete and I could die in peace. I felt my heart break and swell looking between Maura's tear streaked face and Angela's sleeping body in my arms. They were my little family...my precious little family and I loved them so much...both of them. They were all I had. They were everything to me...both of them.

In a matter of a week Maura had inserted herself into my life, into my mind, and into my heart like no one had in over five years. I wanted to tell her how much she meant to me. I wanted to express my gratitude but my feelings were beyond words. Words could never express how my heart truly felt. I could not have survived the chaos of Angela's accident without her. I knew that, I knew I owed Maura everything. But how could I show her...how could I tell her how grateful I was and the feelings I was starting to have for her? Feelings that weren't just...just friendship!

I started to speak to Maura again but I was cut off by her soft soprano voice singing a song. The song wasn't in a language I understood...it sounded like French. But Maura's voice was beautiful and strong even though it was soft and melodious. The melody was simple and the notes were easy, but there was a beauty in the song and in Maura's voice that washed over me and made me feel calm.

I sighed looking down at my daughter's beautiful face as Maura sang. Her voice brought me to tears, it was so tender and gentle and warm. I ran my fingers through Angela's hair as Maura sang. Tears streamed down my face as I watched my baby. I knew the song was for her. I knew Maura in some strange way was sending all her love to my daughter in that song. I could feel the love...way down in side of me...I could feel every ounce of love Maura had in her spirit washing over me. Even though I didn't understand the language, even though I didn't know what the words meant...I could just...I could just feel it.

I kissed my daughters forehead as tears streamed down my cheeks and landed in soft little puddles on Angela's face and chest. When I broke from the kiss Angela's eyes were open...just a little bit. She was looking right at me for the first time in almost a week. My voice caught in my throat and my heart skipped two beats. My baby was awake and she was looking at me. Maura's voice washed over us both as the tears streamed faster and faster down my cheeks. I could feel Maura with me, I could feel her standing right next to me singing right to me and my baby. I could feel Maura's presence everywhere in the room, I could feel her arm on my shoulder protecting me, guiding me, loving me. Angela's tiny hand reached up and touched my cheek softly, just for a moment. Our eyes locked to each other.

There was no pain in Angela's eyes, there was no agony in her face, she showed no signs of blame or hurt over what had happened to her. She looked up at me like she loved me...like I was mommy and she was my baby and she trusted and loved me no matter what. I cried softly looking down at my baby. She looked so calm. We stared right into each others eyes for endless moments until Maura's pretty voice subsided in the background and I heard her sigh softly.

"I love you baby girl," I whispered to my daughter through my tears, "I love you and daddy loves you too." I said.

I thought I saw Angela smile briefly around the tubes in her mouth before her eyes closed again and she drifted back into a pleasant sleep.

I looked up at Maura. There were tears running down her own cheeks.

"Did you see Maura...did you see her look at me? Did you see her smile?" I cried excited and elated and overcome with joyful tears.

Maura's smile was breathtaking.

"I did...I saw everything," she said softly.

We looked at each other for long moments. I didn't know if it was seconds or minutes or hours. It felt like time had fallen away, it felt like there was nothing and no one else in the world but me, my baby, and Maura. I felt my heart pour out to Muara...I felt my walls crumble...I felt my spirit open up and fly into the heavens. I felt years and years of regret and pain and agony wash away and spotless unfiltered love and admiration for the woman on the screen replaced all of my misery. There was a glow around Maura...a halo of the purest light. I wanted to reach through the screen and touch her, I wanted to feel her hold me in her arms, I wanted so many things in that moment. But somehow...I was still more content that I'd ever been in my life. I couldn't believe what was happening to me. I couldn't believe how light and happy I felt. I couldn't believe so many things.

"That was...that was beautiful Maura," I said in a choked trembling voice.

Maura smiled warmly, she seemed elated that I complimented her song.

"My nanny used to sing that song to me before bed or when I was ill. It always made me feel better and feel...and feel less lonely that my own parents were...were never there." Maura said sadly.

Maura's eyes lowered and I saw her sigh heavily. My heart broke. What loneliness was she feeling? What pain was she remembering? What torment had she gone through as a child? I found myself becoming suspiciously infuriated that someone had made Maura feel unwanted or unloved ever in her life. My own childhood hadn't been perfect...but I'd never ever questioned whether or not I was loved. I had a fierce, loud, boisterous family to fight with and scream at and talk to whenever I needed them. I grew up knowing there was always someone there. Even when the world around me was cruel and unforgiving...I always had my family. I think that's why I fell apart the way I did when I lost them...it was because I knew I had lost everything that held me together. I knew how precious family was...I knew I had nothing and was no one without them. But...I don't think Maura had ever known what family really was. I don't think she'd ever had loud family dinners or family game night or arguments over what movie everyone wanted to watch. Maura didn't have siblings to spar with or back her up when she got in trouble. Maura had never experienced so many things. As accomplished and powerful as Maura was...I was terrified that she was empty inside. I was empty too...but at least I knew what I was missing. Maura had no idea and it upset me.

I didn't want Maura to see that it was upsetting me to watch her become so sad though. If Maura was lonely...I would give her company. I would drive away the shadows in her mind as she drove away mine. If no one else would show Maura the love she deserved...I'd carry that cross myself and consider it an honor. I had nothing else to offer her, I had no money to give, and my words would never be enough. But I could still be there for her, I could do my best to see that she never felt lonely again.

"Please come home tonight Maura..." I said softly "I really miss you,"

It looked like Maura's heart broke in that instant. She looked up at me and smiled between glistening eyes filled with fresh tears. I could see her swallow down a lump in her throat and her face flush a little bit. She looked so pretty to me in that moment.

"I'll be there Jane...it might be late...but I'll be there." she smiled at me.

I smiled back. I was so excited...I just couldn't wait!

Maura and I talked for another hour or so about everything under the sun as I held Angela's sleeping form. I wasn't so upset anymore that Angela never opened her eyes again. I knew she was fine...I knew she'd be ok. I knew the best doctor and the best daddy would do everything in their power to make sure my baby came home healthy and happy. I was sad when Maura was called away. I didn't want to let her go but she promised over and over again she'd be home tonight. I relented finally and said goodbye before she signed off the internet feed and the screen went blank. I couldn't wait to see her. I left the hospital with a light heart and a head full of ideas of what I wanted to make Maura for dinner. I'd whistled the entire limo ride home and all the way to the apartment until the doors opened to chaos and Franklin Thomas ran by with Maura's underwear wrapped around his leg.

Present time:

"You bad dog motha," Consuela repeated jabbing the knife at me.

"Whoooaaa, relax there angry pants...put the damn knife down Consuela you don't wanna do nothing crazy," I said holding up my arms and feigning fear sarcastically.

Franklin Thomas ran around the couch a few more times yipping and barking excitedly. At one point he rolled over on his back and tried to wrestle the underwear off his foot with his teeth. He was growling and tearing at it like a maniac but it only wrapped around his entire head instead and he stood up shaking his little body violently trying to disentangle himself from Maura's sexy bright pink undergarments. I laughed all over again.

"SEE!" Consuela screeched "El DIABLO!" she hissed approaching Franklin Thomas' form with the knife held high over her head.

I moved swiftly and snatched the knife from her hands. Consuela spun on me, grabbed a couch pillow and started beating me with me ferociously.

"You and devil dog be death of me. Dog always peeing and pooping...you with smart mouth and sloppy ways...you make me lose mind before I sixty! All my family live long life...you and DIABLO kill me while I still young!" Consuela screeched beating me with the pillow incessantly.

I laughed running back to the kitchen and tossing the knife in the sink. I ran around the other side of the huge kitchen island and spun on Consuela.

"You ain't been young in thirty years Consuela...and Franklin Thomas wouldn't pee on everything if you didn't suck so bad." I teased sticking my tongue out at her and taking off again dodging the pillow Consuela let fly at my head.

"You cause much havoc...house peaceful and quiet before you come here...now everything chaos! You and devil dog spawn of Satan! And you need eat more...you look like stick!" Consuela said for like the hundredth time.

I rounded on her again.

"Why don't you give me some of your extra flubber chubbs if you're so worried about me being skinny," I teased Consuela.

She turned bright red and found another pillow to launch at my head.

"You evil!" she screeched.

I ran around a corner and the pillow missed me. I heard Franklin Thomas' growls and then I heard Consuela's screeches. I poked my head back around the corner and almost died laughing. Franklin Thomas was dangling from the hem of Consuela's uniform by his teeth and growling every time she spun in a circle shreeking and screaming to try to get him off.

"Diablo...DIABLO!" Consuela raved.

She waddled awkwardly toward the kitchen weighed down by Franklin Thomas' weight.

I could barely stop laughing enough to get to the kitchen but when I did I found Consuela screaming and spinning in circles jabbing at Franklin Thomas with a broom trying to get him to let go of her uniform. Franklin Thomas only growled harder and tore at the dress violently. Finally with a ripping sound a great section of Consuela's uniform tore off and my puppy landed on the floor and hopped away with his prize.

I laughed all the harder. Consuela was fuming.

"You and devil dog make do for selves. I leaving for day." Consuela said pushing past me and stalking out of the apartment.

Franklin Thomas reappeared running up to me with his prize. I picked him up and cuddled him against me. I loved that damn dog. I played with Franklin Thomas until late afternoon and I knew I needed to start making dinner. I wanted to cook for Maura. She promised to come home tonight and I wanted to have something special waiting for her when she got home. I didn't have the money to buy her things like Maura did for me...but...Ma always said you could show all the love you had in a good hot meal.

I smiled thinking of Ma and meals at the Rizzolli family dinner table. Every meal was a production and every meal was an adventure. That was always were I felt safest, that was always where I felt joy. I hadn't had a family dinner in five long years...I hadn't thought I'd ever have one again. But now...now I wanted one more than anything.

I wanted to cook for Maura...I wanted her to eat my meal and taste all the love and gratitude I had for her. I wanted to cater to her and listen to her tell me all about her week without me. I wanted to pour her wine and serve her myself and smile at every bite she took. I wanted to run her a bath and rub her shoulders and tell her how special she was to me...how much I appreciated her...how much I adored her. I wanted to crawl in bed next to her and wrap my arms around her and listen to the steady heartbeat in her chest and feel the vibrations of her body as she spoke. I wanted to thank her for all the things she'd done for me, I wanted her to believe me when I said thank you. I wanted to fall asleep next to her and dream of her all night and know that she dreamed of me also. I wanted so many things...but I'd start with making her dinner. I was so excited. Everything was going to be perfect.

Maura

I left my office as soon as I could. I went straight home and grabbed my luggage and the crate that held my tortious Bass. Actually, my driver grabbed my luggage and Bass' crate. I'd left a change of address request with the post office earlier to have all my mail delivered to New York for the time being, and I had my utilities cut off until I returned. I set my alarm and locked the door never looking back as I returned to the limo. My home in Boston was cold and lonely. The only light that shown in the place was when I was talking to Jane. I couldn't wait to see what my apartment in New York had become in my absence. I didn't know exactly what I would be walking into but...I knew it was far from the cold empty place as when I left.

It was well after seven pm before I got to the hanger and after seven-thirty before we finally took off. These last four days had been...they had been trying at best. I was absolutely swamped at work. Every other step I took someone was calling my name and asking for something or wondering why I was leaving for so long. I gave them the professional information they wanted and avoided their probing personal questions. I wasn't overly friendly with anyone at work normally and I saw no need to change that now. I found most of their questions about my personal life annoying at best. I had no time to even pretend to indulge my coworkers. I had time only for my work and for Jane.

I did have to bend at some point to inquire about an open vehicular homicide case that was never solved. I didn't tell Jane about my looking into her family's case. I didn't want to get her hopes up. I wasn't the chief medical examiner for the BPD when her family was killed in that horrible accident. My predecessor was...well they were far from thorough. I had to sweet talk Korsack into telling me where the file was located. I'd dug through a million file boxes in a dusty dingy basement storage area looking for Jane's family's file. I spent half the night reading through the file Tuesday and half of yesterday morning trying to figure out where the car was that hit Jane's family. I found out it was in some police lot far outside the city. I'd driven straight there after work and went back through the car with a fine toothed comb.

It had been five years since the accident but I had to try. I managed to lift several sets of finger prints and even took some blood samples I found on the steering wheel and a few hair samples from the seat. Advances in forensic sciences and the introduction of a nation wide DNA data base since Jane's family's death may have been exactly what was necessary to catch whatever horrible person had gotten away with the murder of three innocent people. I sent all the samples off to the lab and prayed they were enough to yield some new information. But I wouldn't tell Jane...not yet...not until I knew for sure if we could catch the person. I wanted Jane to find closure, but...I didn't want to get her hopes up only to break her heart all over again. I cared for Jane too much to do that.

I thought of Jane often and always. Usually while I worked I thought of nothing other than work. But now...now I always had Jane and Angela in the back of my mind. Jane even plagued my dreams at night and was the first person I thought of in the morning. I couldn't believe how much I missed her. I couldn't believe how much I looked forward to going home and seeing her face in person again. I couldn't believe how much I loved staying up late just looking at her on my computer screen even though I was so tired I could barely form coherent words. I loved hearing her chat away about this thing or the other thing and especially about Angela.

Jane's face always lit up when she spoke of her daughter. Each passing day Jane seemed to be growing more and more comfortable with her surroundings and with me. She opened up to me more and more telling me about her family and various memories she had of them. Jane didn't seem so hurt or angry anymore when she spoke of her mother and her brothers. She spoke mostly with a fondness and a smile on her face. Every now and then though her smile would falter and her eyes would water when speaking of them...but I always moved quickly to comfort her or change the subject of conversation completely. I didn't like to see Jane cry. My entire existence had become devoted to making sure I'd never have to see that again. Jane's tears always broke my heart.

I especially loved seeing how happy Jane was with her new puppy Franklin Thomas. Jane cried like a baby when she opened the box and saw him for the first time. I'd cried right along with her. The whole flight Monday morning I'd been plagued with guilt and sadness that I had to leave Jane behind and alone in our huge apartment that was so unfamiliar to her and knowing she had nightmares if she slept alone. The first call I made when I landed in Boston was to Addison to check up on Angela, then to Consuela to make sure she took care of Jane, then to the Humane Society to adopt a puppy for Jane.

I couldn't get the conversation she and I had Sunday night while we watched that awful Sarah McLachlan dead puppy commercial for the Humane Society out of my head. I also couldn't get the sad look on Jane's face when she told me about how her mother would never let her have a puppy as a child out of my thoughts. I'd picked Franklin Thomas myself off the Humane Society's website and had him washed and groomed and delivered to Jane. I picked Franklin Thomas because he looked so happy, and had curly hair like Jane. He just looked like the perfect fuzzy creature to cuddle up next to Jane while she cuddled up next to me. I loved watching him run around in the background while I talked to Jane at night. Ever since she got him Jane had been far more bouncy and cheerful than she was before. I was more than grateful for that. Consuela, however, was far less than thrilled. I'd received an angry phone call from her Tuesday afternoon.

Tuesday afternoon

"Hello?" I answered my office phone pleasantly. I'd just spoken to Jane and I was in a very good mood despite how tired I was.

"Doctor...you must take back evil Diablo dog. He menace...he mess everything up. He pee of floor and eat sock and chew carpet and swing off drapes! HE EVIL!" Consuela practically screeched at me.

The woman was always ill-tempered at best...but she sounded beside herself with frustration over Franklin Thomas. I tried not to giggle...but it was a bit humorous.

"Consuela...Franklin Thomas is a gift for Jane. She loves him and he stays!" I said kindly but still with an air of finality.

I knew before I adopted a puppy that it wouldn't be easy. I'd never acquired a dog for myself because they required so much work and attention. I prefered Bass. He was quiet and he didn't chew up my things and he didn't cause a ruckus. But Jane was not me...and she had the wild spirit that could care for a dog far better than I. I knew there would be bumps in the road with Franklin Thomas, but I would work through them and so would Consuela. She didn't have a choice anyway...my word was final.

"But he EEEEVIL! DIABLO! I kill him!" Consuela screeched. She sounded out of breath and panicked.

I smiled.

"Consuela don't touch the dog. I'll hire an expert to train Franklin Thomas when I get back but until then you better not touch a hair on his curly little head." I said sternly.

Consuela sighed.

"Why you love Miss Jane so much? She have smart mouth and bad attitude. She throw pillow at me dis morning when I try to wake her up. She evil like dog!" Consuela wailed.

I grinned.

"Were you doing something to antagonize Jane Consuela?" I chided my housemaid.

I knew Consuela...I knew how she was.

"Neva...neva me!" she feigned innocence.

I rolled my eyes.

"Consuela I'll be home Thursday...don't touch the dog and be nice to Jane," I said and hung up.

I giggled the rest of the day thinking of how much it was killing Consuela to concede to my wishes.

Present Time on the plane ride back to Boston:

I thought the entire plane ride home of Jane and Angela. It made me so happy to see them together. I knew instantly that Jane was a wonderful mother. I could tell by the way she cradled Angela in her arms. I could tell by the way she kissed her head so tenderly. I could tell by the way Jane whispered softly while she held her baby. I could tell by the smile that never left her face the entire time her child was in her arms. I couldn't get the image from my head. I couldn't stop thinking of the way Jane called me Angela's daddy, and with a sincere smile on her face at that. I couldn't stop thinking of the way Jane cried when I sang to Angela. It was an old French lullaby my nanny used to sing to me when I was a child. I remembered it word for word and sang it for Angela.

I really wanted to be there with Jane...I really wanted to hold Jane as she held Angela. I really wanted to speak to Addison in person and let Jane alone to spend time with her daughter. Addison called me last night and told me how much Jane cried when she first held her daughter. Jane never told me any of that when we spoke later. I knew she was trying to be brave for me...I knew she didn't want me to think she was weak or ungrateful. I knew she just wanted to talk about happy things for my sake. But I saw the pain behind her eyes, I saw the tears that were left unfallen. I saw the shadow in her spirit. Jane couldn't hide that from me. I'd seen Jane in the depths of her dispair...I knew what it looked like...I couldn't be fooled. That's why I had the laptop sent to her this morning...I'm so glad I did. The memory I made of Jane and Angela was priceless.

I couldn't wait to see Jane again. It was only a forty-five minute flight to New York from Boston. I hadn't called Jane to tell her I was on my way...I wanted to surprise her. I wanted to sweep her into a hug and wrap my fingers in her dark curls. I wanted to tell her how much I missed her. I wanted to pet Franklin Thomas, and introduce Bass to them, and have dinner with Jane, and listen to her gab away about everything that had happened in my absence.

I wanted to see what Albert had made of Angela's nursery...not doubt it was over the top and ridiculous. I wanted Jane to crawl into bed next to me and cuddle me as she had done before. I wanted to fall asleep to the sound of her steady peaceful breathing and dream only of her as I had done since I met her. I wanted to wake next to her and eat breakfast with her and spend every moment I could in her company. I wanted so many things. So many things.

I was beyond weary when I finally arrived at the hotel. Jane had left me eight text messages on my phone telling me how much she missed me and how happy she was that I was coming home tonight. My heart melted more and more as I read through each message on the elevator on the way up to the apartment I now shared so openly with Jane. I'd never been so happy to be going home. I'd never been so full of hope and excitement to walk into the apartment I once thought was cold and dark and lonely. I couldn't wait see it filled with all the light and chaos Jane brought into my life. I smiled all the way up...until I started smelling smoke. The smell got stronger and stronger until the elevator doors opened and my eyes were bombarded with black smoke and the smell of fire.

I was shocked. What the hell was going on? I stepped out of the elevator and looked around. The smoke alarm was blaring like crazy, there was laundry scattered everywhere. Franklin Thomas was barking madly somewhere. Smoke was billowing from the kitchen. I ran into the kitchen in a wide-eyed panic. My jaw dropped when I walked in there. There was flour everywhere, the stove was covered in red sauce...the refridgerator and countertops and floor were covered in red splash streaks. There was a bowl of salad spilled all over the floor, the oven was open and smoking like crazy. A foamy white substance was covering the inside. A fire extinguisher was laying about haphazardly on the floor and I could barely hear myself think above the sound of the smoke alarm. Worst of all Jane was sitting on the floor crying hysterically and covered in what looked like everything that was in the fridge. Even her hair had streaks of flour in it and bits of lettuce and loads of red sauce. She looked like she'd been attacked by the entire kitchen and she fought back tooth and nail.

"JANE!" I screeched

Jane uncovered her eyes and looked shocked when she saw me standing there. She started crying twice as hard as she made her way onto her unsteady feet.

"MAURA...I'm so sorry!" Jane wailed.

"I'm so sorry...I just wanted to make you dinner," She cried and cried.

She was a freaking mess. Franklin Thomas was licking sauce off her legs in between barking over the blaring alarm. I was shocked still. What the hell was going on? I started moving toward Jane. Jane backed away from me step by step. Her eyes were wild and terrified.

"I wanted to surprise you...I wanted to...to make you dinner like my Ma used to and..."

I stepped forward...Jane stepped back.

"Everything just went all wrong..." she wailed.

I stepped forward she stepped back. Jane grew more and more hysterical the closer I got.

"I should have paid attention better when my Ma tried to teach me to cook...I should have known to cover the sauce...I should have known not to use so much flour...I should have known not to set the oven so high..." Jane wailed backing away from me more and more.

Her eyes were wide and her speech was rushed and panicked

I moved closer and closer to her until she was pinned against the far wall. Jane looked ridiculous covered in food as she was. She was crying and blubbering and trying to pull bits of food from her hair. She was wearing the same dress and heels she wore when I first met her in my hotel bar. Even as messy as she was...even with my kitchen and my house in total disarray she looked so beautiful. Jane had even done her make up I could tell under all the sauce spattered over her face.

Jane just cried and cried backed against the wall. I couldn't understand what she was saying anymore. She looked so defeated and so sad standing there all covered in goo with the alarms blaring and the dog barking like crazy.

Jane flinched when I reached up and wiped a bit of sauce away from her lips.

"I just wanted to make you happy," She wailed looking at me with her giant brown orbs pleading for understanding and full of terror and grief.

My heart melted watching tears stream down Jane's beautiful face. Jane tried to speak further no doubt to plead her case more but I needed to hear none of it. I cradled her face gently in my hands leaned in and kissed her softly on her precious tender lips.

Jane seemed shocked at first. Her entire body tensed up in my arms, she grabbed my wrist tightly almost as if to pull them away...but I didn't stop. I kissed her sweetly, gently, kindly. Slowly I felt Jane's body relax and her mouth opened for me. I let my tongue wander between her soft lips and felt Jane's own tongue meet mine in a beautiful dance of heat and passion. Jane wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me closer. I wrapped my arms around her slender waist and pulled her body into mine. We stood there kissing for long seconds lost in an oblivion neither of us had ever known. I could have stood there for hours kissing her despite the horrible alarm, despite the barking dog running around our feet, despite the toxic smoke filling the room, despite the fact that Jane was wearing more food than was in the refrigerator. I could have kissed her forever, I was lost in the beauty of the moment. Jane's body trembled in my arms and a soft sigh escaped her mouth into my own. I smiled against her lips. My body was on fire...every part of me was burning inside and out. I cradled Jane's beautiful face in my hand as I kissed her with all the passion that had been building in my heart and mind for only her. I loved the way Jane kissed me back. I loved the feeling of her hand wrapped tightly in my hair and the way she pulled just a little bit. I loved the way her breath had become ragged and uneven...just like my own. I loved everything about her...but our reverie was broken when the elevator dinged and the sound of many heavy boots burst into the apartment.

"New York Fire Department...is anybody hurt in here?" A voice called.

Suddenly the kitchen was filled with a dozen fine men of the fire department all dressed up in their gear. Jane looked terrified and embarrassed. Her face was a flushed furious red and her eyes looked panicked again. We must have looked like the silliest sight in the world. My own dress was covered in food now after my kiss with Jane and the alarms were still blaring and Franklin Thomas was dangling off of one of the Fire Men's coat. The poor Fire Man was spinning around in circles and exclaiming loudly his arms flailing and the others around him laughing hysterically.

This was the most ridiculous thing that had ever happened in this apartment...ever! So much for my quiet little private retreat. I smiled.

"Franklin Thomas...STOP THAT!" Jane wailed at her little puppy who was tearing violently at the Fire Man's coat and growling like a maniac.

Jane looked beyond flustered and humiliated. She ran through the crowd of firemen and swooped Franklin Thomas into her arms and ran away. I thought I heard the bedroom door slam behind her. I sighed heavily.

The Firemen all turned and stared at me in wide-eyed confusion and amusement. They all wore curious grins and had twinkling eyes. What on earth must they be thinking?

I laughed nervously.

"Everything is fine gentlemen...Jane was just making me dinner," I forced a pleasant smile.

"She's uhhhh...she's no chef!" The oldest fireman said looking at the mess all over the kitchen.

Everyone chuckled including me.

"She's uhhhh...she's hot though. She aint gotta know how to cook, not with those legs and that face." Another of the firemen cracked.

Everyone laughed again except me...I didn't laugh that time. I rolled my eyes and glared at the one who spoke of Jane so...so inappropriately. I wasn't furious with him...he was right after all. I had the same feelings as he about Jane but still...I was the one locked in a kiss with Jane moments before and now Jane was hiding somewhere probably crying and full of humiliation.

It took five minutes for the alarms to clear and silence and another ten minutes to get the firefighters to leave the apartment...which they did with many jokes and rounds of raucous laughter. I smiled after they left and looked around my apartment. It was an absolute disaster. Laundry was everywhere, my kitchen looked like a bomb went off in there, a piece of Consuela's uniform was in the middle of the hallway and the whole apartment smelled like burning smoke. I found myself giggling uncontrollably as I looked around.

"Chaos and Light," I said to myself as I thought of Jane hiding away in the bedroom.

I knocked on the bedroom door lightly.

"Jane," I said softly.

I heard her sniffling behind the door. She must have been leaning against it.

"I'm such an idiot," She wailed.

I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Jane sweetheart open the door." I pleaded as patiently as I could.

"NO! I don't want you to see me like this. I ruined your house and embarrassed you in front of the firemen. I just wanted to make you dinner and surprise you and make you happy. I can't even do that right. I messed everything up! I always mess everything up!" Jane wailed and cried.

"Oh Good Grief!" I sighed heavily.

"Sweetheart...it's ok...I have a whole staff of people who do nothing but clean up other people's messes. And you didn't embarrass me...everyone thought it was kinda funny actually. And it's sweet of you to think of making dinner for me. I'm honored that you tried so hard." I said choking back a laugh.

The condition of my kitchen said Jane indeed had tried very hard...even if it didn't actually work out for the better.

"Will you please open the door Jane...don't make me talk to you like this. I want to see your pretty face." I said softly.

"NO! I'm hideous like this. I'm all covered in food." Jane sobbed.

I rolled my eyes.

"It didn't stop me from kissing you! Besides, your sauce tasted delicious...even if it never made it on to a plate." I chuckled looking down at my own ruined dress.

I smiled.

"Really?" Jane asked sweetly.

My smile widened.

"Yes Jane...I loved it...now will you please open the door and talk to me?" I pleaded.

Jane opened the door and stood there covered in food with a guilty smile on her face. Her face was still flushed with embarrassment but she looked very happy to see me. My heart melted.

"I missed you Jane Rizzolli," I smiled at her.

Jane swept me into a crushing hug.

"Daddy's home," Jane laughed sweetly into my ear.

I'd never been so happy in all my life.