Sometimes when it snows, it makes everything so empty. That it's only white frozen water that would melt into the dirty ground, but if you think further, that melted snow would also help the vegetation; that melted snow would help life flourished. You're a snow flake, frozen among thousands, but when you sink beneath the soil then maybe one day you'll be a beautiful flower. I remember a dealer that my aunt worked for told me that. He was a nice guy, not greedy, but he was just, lost. It was weird, because I was only ten; I thought I would forget something like that.


She sat on the wet Earth. Her small frail body could no longer take the pain. The abuse. The shame. She could no longer stand looking into the mirror. She could no longer feel the happiness that use to make her fingers tingle. The heavy pit in her lower abdomen felt it was about to suck her in whole. The rain lightly fell numbly onto to her scarred arms. Her clothes already muddy and the sky was grey. One day she hoped to see the sky purple. Like amethyst and silver linings. She curled up where a puddle formed around her. In a distance she could hear them calling her. Yelling her name. Who is 'they'? Maybe its just one person. Or maybe two. She is sure its just her imagination. No one is calling out for her. No one is looking for her. She is alone in her own distinguishing world.

I wish I could start eating again. My stomach yearns for food. I cannot give it what it wants though. That is not the worst of it though. I've been having a lot of trouble sleeping. Insomnia I suspect. Maybe I'm just slowly losing my mind. It's been about three nights with hardly any sleep. Maybe six hours all together. Its scary because I'm afraid that if I tell, Sakura, or Yao, they'll tell Alfred. He would be so disappointed. I don't want to ruin his happiness because of me. I'm afraid he might tell the Dean, and he'll have me sent back to my aunt. I would rather die than see her god-awful face again. That's too harsh. But I really do mean it. But still I would rather die even with all this pain. I would like to die someday with all these ghosts drawn on my back... Sincerely Madeline Williams

She signed her name with swirls and a happy face.


The rain started to fall heavy. The cold droplets slapped against the child's face. It covered the tears but I couldn't cover her puffy sad eyes. Faint footsteps came closer. Her purple puffy eyes lingered on a reflection of herself. Tired, sad, but this reflection has blue eyes. "Hi Aflie" Her voiced croaked.

She awoke hyperventilating with stinging forearms. Trying to get up, she was too weak, but she kept trying. Her whole body was screaming at her to eat, to stop the purging, to get help. In her head she wanted to just end it all. The zig-zags that lined her arms were not enough. The purging was not enough. Getting help would never make her feel any better.

Slowly she made her way to the bathroom. Drinking a glass of hot water the empty pit in her stomach relaxed, then her went to take a hot shower. That's probably what she needed. She was unable to remove her red pajamas so instead she entered with clothing. She sunk to the bottom of the tub while the shower head shot hot water at her. Her eyes felt heavier than earlier.

She went to sleep with a smile. It was the first time in a long time she had a dreamless sleep.

-oOo-

It was until dawn when Madeline awoke still in the running shower. The water was now freezing cold. Her body felt completely frozen. Struggling to sit up she torn down the shower curtains. "Oops." Her voice cracked.

A light knock at the door startled the saddened Canadian. "Madeline-san are you okay?"

It was Sakura. Quickly turning off the water she wiped her cold hair away from her face. "Y-yeah j-just a lit-tle accident." Madeline spoke up. Her voice sounded meek.

"Okay, well I'm going to get breakfast then go to class, I'll see you in the hall." She waited until the door closed.

Hearing the faint click of the door locking, Madeline sat herself at the edge of tub. Her pajamas soaking wet, and her body completely frozen.

She could hear her stomach growl.

-oOo-

"Heyyy Maddie! GUESS WHHHAAAT?" An eager voice burst through the halls as the weary Canadian barely made it down the stairs. She looked back. Her brother was smiling wide. Full of happiness. Happier than she's ever seen. He skidded to a stop. "We got paid! Yeah! Now I can buy more Mickey Ds!"

"Paid?" Madeline tilted her head. She knew that they both get paid at the end of every month but her aunt always took the money for 'personal' reasons. Butterflies fluttered in her chest. "R-really?"

"Yes really! The lady from the big S place gave us erm ATM cards. Ha! The dean was 'Spend it wisely boy' and I said 'Dude, first I'm getting a pair of new gloves'" She rolled her eyes as she placed a false but convincing smile. Alfred eagerly gave Madeline an envelope. The bell rang. "Oh craaaaauuuckrrrrs, I'll be late for class! I'm gonna sit next to the cute British girl today!" Alfred nearly cursed, again.

"Bye Alfie." She waved. Glancing down at the envelope she sat on the steps. The gold colored rectangle paper felt heavy. She carefully tore open the paper. It revealed a several papers all stapled perfectly and a ATM card cautiously attached to another paper. "Hm?"

She carefully put all the contents back into the envelope and stuck it safely in her bag.

-oOo-

"Heyyy, you're the girl who totally saved my Toris' life!" A girl with short blonde hair scooted her desk closer to Madeline. The confused Canadian examined the girl. She had blue eyes, and a sly grin on her face. Madeline looked at her uniform, it was the same. 'wait, either she's really flat chested or…'

"Oh, hello again Madeline. I see you've met Felix" It was Toris. 'oh yeah, we have the same geometry class'

"Hello Toris" Madeline's amethyst eyes glanced at his bruises from the day before. Noticing her actions he quickly covered the bruises.

"They look more like something Felix would give me than being choked by um that other guy." His face turned pink after what he said. Felix was smirking at the now embarrassed Lithuanian.

Madeline plastered her best smile. 'Oh dear, was that suppose to be a joke? But is 'Felix' a girl? I'm confused now.' "Ahaha, well hello Felix. I'm Madeline Williams."

"Oh, Madeline. That's like a pretty name!" He or she beamed with happiness. "I totally wanna hang out with my Toris' savior after school! Hows that sound? Okay, well i'll see you like after class."

Felix skipped out of the class room before the blank girl could answer. Madeline was confused by Felix's gender. 'He, she, or whatever sex, but I guess I can make more friends' She slightly smiled. Looking back up at Toris he looked like he was about to slap himself.

"Toris? A-are you okay?" The purple eyed Canadian poked the embarrassed boy on the elbow. She giggled when he refused to answer and covered his face groaning. "Your friend seems very fun."

"Y-you think so?" The Lithuania smiled. Unexpectedly he frowned then hid behind a text book shaking. Madeline was slightly confused by the sudden change.

Looking around the classroom she spotted a certain person glaring at Toris and a creepy aura brought the room to freezing.