Four hours.
Four hours and twenty-seven minutes to be precise.
That was how long it had been since Carlisle left in a hurry. With the clocks now slowly ticking past four a.m., the Cullens would normally be found spending time together either in the living room or out hunting. Instead, this morning found three of them gone, three more in the living room sitting in silence, and the seventh in his room wallowing in guilt and confusion.
The seventh was, of course, Edward. Having trapped himself inside his bedroom moments after Carlisle had left for the hospital, Edward sat himself in the very middle of his room, closed his eyes, and had not moved since. No one had been allowed inside; Esme and Alice had both tried to speak with him but soon gave up when he ignored their words of comfort. This was something he had to work out on his own.
Edward wanted to believe Carlisle more than anything, but there was no suppressing the nagging doubt about Harry. What was he? Why was he here? And how did he know about vampires? These questions reverberated non-stop around Edward's head, never answering themselves, only bringing up more questions. Would he tell? Was he sent here to find them? Was he … dangerous?
'Yes,' Edward mused. He had no doubt that being on Harry's bad side was a very dangerous place to stand. He could see why Carlisle thought it important to get into the boy's good books.
'But –' Edward opened his eyes and frowned. Carlisle wasn't friendly to Harry because he knew the boy could turn against him. He did it because that's what he does: sees the good in people. Even in the lowest of lowlifes he could see the potential for them to be something great had they only chosen the right path. Was it really so hard to believe that Carlisle could see the good in Harry because the boy was just a good person?
Edward let out a lengthy sigh. That was just one of the many traits Edward did not share with his father. His trust was something that people had to earn. He would always assume the worst of someone and wait to be proven otherwise. That was just how he went through life. Partly, he supposed, that was due to being a mind-reader. It was a much quicker process to find out if someone was worth trusting when you had access to their thoughts. Which was precisely why Edward found it so difficult to trust Harry.
Never having encountered anyone else in the past whose mind he could not read, Edward was stumped as to what to do. He had always relied on his ability to learn about people. He could find out almost everything worth knowing about a person after listening to their thoughts for a few hours, and now faced with someone where that was not possible he didn't have the faintest idea what to do.
'Be like Carlisle,' his thoughts answered him. Be like Carlisle. Was it that simple? Could he really just change the way he had interacted with people for the last almost 90 years and learn about Harry… like a person?
'You owe him.' Owe who? He supposed he owed Harry the chance to prove himself and show that he could be trusted. It was the sort of thing Carlisle would do: give someone a chance.
Carlisle.
He definitely owed his father. He owed him the return of his unwavering trust. Carlisle was right; he had never made a decision that wasn't in the best interest of those he loved, and Edward knew that he wouldn't start now. He knew it would be difficult, dropping his guard, but he would try, and that was all he owed Harry and Carlisle: to try.
Filled with a new purpose, Edward stood up and went to join the rest of his family in the wait.
It was only another fifteen minutes before Edward heard the engine of the Mercedes make the turn off the highway into the drive up to their home. Soon enough Carlisle's thoughts came into range and they immediately had Edward frowning.
'Myokardinfarkt: durch plötzliche Mangelversorgung bedingter Untergang des Herzmuskelgewebes.'
Carlisle was translating his medical dictionary into German. He was hiding something.
Soon enough the engine quieted, a car door opened and closed, and Carlisle was at the front door letting himself inside. The others went out to meet him, but Esme was the fastest, getting their first and giving her husband a welcoming kiss. Edward could see the stress in Carlisle's body: grasping Esme's arms slightly tighter than usual, deepening the kiss for a second longer than average. He pulled away and smiled at his wife and family, but the joy never reached his dark eyes.
"I should hunt. I only have a few hours before I need to be back," Carlisle muttered and turned back around to head out the door. He was going to leave without saying anything.
"Wait!" Edward spluttered. "Carlisle, what –"
"I'll speak with you all when I return." And without even looking at Edward, he opened the door and vanished from sight. Edward was just about to run out and follow him when a small but firm hand grabbed his shoulder and held him back.
"Don't, Edward," Alice whispered. "He wants to be alone." Jasper nodded and opened his mouth to speak.
"His emotions didn't make much sense. Disappointment, loss, amazement. He just needs time to gather his thoughts together."
"How long?"
"One hour." Alice reached up to give her brother a kiss on the cheek and left the room with Jasper by her side.
Esme hadn't taken her gaze away from the front door which still stood open letting in a cool breeze.
'What was he thinking, Edward.'
Edward shook his head. "He was blocking his thoughts. I don't know what happened."
Sighing in worry, Esme closed the front door and made her way back into the living room while Edward stayed where he was in the entryway. One hour. Then Carlisle promised he would answer their questions.
Having no other option but to wait, Edward made his way back to his bedroom for what was sure to be a very slow hour.
2 hours later
"Alice," Edward growled. "You said –"
"I know what I said, Edward," she snapped. "He keeps changing his mind as to when he's coming back. He can't decide if he's ready to talk yet."
Almost two hours had passed since Carlisle had come home and left again, and still there was no sign of him returning. Everyone had reconvened in the living room and Edward was getting agitated.
"I'm going to find him," he announced, and without waiting for anyone's response, he ran. He only caught the beginning of Alice's parting thought.
'Edward, be –' He didn't go back. He just ran.
It was easy enough to pick up Carlisle's scent and so he followed it. Edward ran for what felt like ten minutes before he slowed down and could just make out Carlisle's thoughts.
'– wish I could understand.'
Edward stopped beside a large tree and silently sprang up to sit in its branches. Settling himself down, he listened to everything his father had seen and heard that night.
Harry was gone. Ran away to God knows where, with the knowledge of Carlisle's identity. Edward shut his eyes in frustration. How could he not assume that Harry had run to tell of the vampires in Forks, to send others to come and dispose of them? A piece of branch snapped off in his hands. He was angry at Harry. Angry at his father for –
No.
He wouldn't start that again. He promised himself he would try to be better and to trust Carlisle. He let out a sigh and leapt down out of the tree. Carlisle's thoughts had mostly calmed down, indicating he would probably return home soon. Edward turned to leave.
'I know that you're there, Edward.' He froze, one foot in mid-stride. How long had Carlisle been aware of his presence?
'Edward, I'd like to speak with you. Please?'
Turning himself back around to face the direction he knew his father to be in, Edward ran until he came across a small clearing. In the middle stood Carlisle, his eyes back to their golden shine and looking much more relaxed than earlier.
Edward didn't bother pretending.
"Will Harry come back?"
"I hope so," Carlisle replied, and Edward could see that he meant it. His father had unintentionally formed a bond with the boy, and Edward knew that he wouldn't be truly happy until he knew Harry was safe.
"Carlisle, I want to apologise," he began. Hearing no prompting, Edward continued. "It was wrong of me to not trust your judgement. I've thought about this and I blame my gift for my attitude." Edward could hear the first signs of confusion in Carlisle's mind but his father made no effort to interrupt. He would let Edward do this at his pace. "For my whole existence I've relied on reading people's minds to gain a better insight to their character. I haven't had to find things out the slow way for a long time, and now that I know someone whose mind is closed off to me, that's what I need to be doing. But I didn't give him a chance. Instead I treated him, and you, with hostility and that was wrong. I hope that Harry returns too, because I want to do things properly this time. I need to try."
Edward looked at his father and was relieved to see he was beaming. Suddenly the guilt he had been feeling all night dissipated and he felt that he would truly be able to fulfil his promise.
"Thank-you, Edward. That means a lot," Carlisle said in a slightly strained voice. "I know that it will be challenging for you, but I have faith in you. I always do." He smiled at his son, and Edward couldn't help but return the expression.
"So what happens now?"
Carlisle sighed. "The police will continue their investigation but they won't find anything. They're now convinced it was a planned kidnapping after they discovered the security footage was missing." Edward smiled. Who would have thought Carlisle had it in him? "Harry will only be found when he wants to be. Or rather, if he wants to be," Carlisle corrected.
"I'm sure he'll come back," Edward said, placing a hand on his father's shoulder. He wasn't entirely sure what made him say that. Was it just hope? Or something more?
"So am I." Edward looked into his father's eyes and knew Carlisle believed his words. In Carlisle's mind started replaying the conversation the two of them had had at the hospital and Carlisle's home office. Edward winced and Carlisle frowned.
"Do we have to talk about that now?" He pleaded with his father.
"Now is as good a time as any, Edward. Your reaction in my office yesterday at the hospital was extreme to say the least. What caused that?" The look he gave his son was scrutinising, and Edward suddenly felt like a criminal under questioning.
"I told you, Carlisle, it was just the combination of my thirst and the stress of the situation. It was nothing," he knew Carlisle would hear the lack of conviction in his voice, but thankfully he didn't point it out. Instead he fixed his son with another concerned look and sighed.
"Alright, I'll let it be for now," he said unhappily. "You had better go hunting. See if you can't finally get some colour back into your eyes." Carlisle smiled and gave Edward a comforting pat on the shoulder and went to move past him. "I'm going to head back to the house. I've been gone long enough." He began to head back into the trees.
"Carlisle," Edward called. His father turned around. "I won't let you down." And he meant it.
Carlisle only smiled. "You could never let me down." He turned and disappeared into the trees.
Edward knew Carlisle was right; nothing he ever did could stop Carlisle from loving him. He hoped that Harry would return soon, and when he did Edward was going to be better. Closing his eyes, Edward gave himself over to the hunt and sprang off into the trees.
