A/N: I'm a bit partial to Molly right now and here's another chapter from her POV but will return to CJ eventually. I would have loved to be in that cottage and it seems I'm not the only one thinking that judging by your reviews -lol. Hope you enjoy.
Chapter 16: Molly
We got out of the car and he localised the key to the cottage, hidden in a pot beside the door and let us inside the small wooden house.
"If you don't mind I'll just go and get changed to something that fits me better, then I'll show you around."
"What do you mean? Are you complaining about my dad's impeccable taste? I thought a turd t-shirt was everyone's dream."
"Oh, I don't complain about the t-shirt, but I would very much like a pair of trousers that reach my ankles without me having to show off my naked arse", he smirked.
"I see."
I hoped that it was not possible to hear that my mouth suddenly got dry at the thought of his naked arse. Here I was trying to keep up the easy banter and he ruined it all by planting such images in my head. Totally unfair. It was not better when he returned really, because he looked completely gorgeous in well-fitting dark jeans and a grey pullover that seemed so soft it was probably cashmere. I had learned what cashmere was when I started in the private school. It was something very different from the acrylic knitted jumpers I had at the time. It had been a triumph when I much later purchased my own first cashmere jumper and I still had a soft spot for it, loved the feeling of high-quality wool. I had to hold myself back not to go over and pat the jumper like it was a cat or something because on him it was nearly irresistible, but it would have meant caressing him and that would have been an odd start to our stay here. He looked casual in this compared to the suits he had always worn up to now, yet amazing – and more approachable. No idea to go down that road though. Even if he had not hesitated to hold me when I was scared and had nightmares, I knew he had only touched me by mistake in his sleep. When I tried to kiss him while awake, back in the hotel room, he had made it very clear that he was not up for it. I would not make the same mistake again. One failed attempt had been awkward enough, another try here in this place where it was just the two of us would have been so cripplingly embarrassing that I did not think I would have survived it, so there would definitely not be any touching from my end or any attempts to kiss for that matter.
Blissfully unaware of my thoughts and totally relaxed he asked;
"Do you want to have a look around then? Not that it's huge, you can almost see the whole place just by standing here."
I wanted to, and it was not – huge that is. The cottage consisted of a small but functional kitchen, a living room with a fireplace, sofa, coffee table and two crowded book shelves, one bedroom with a double-bed and an ensuite bathroom. I wondered how the sleeping arrangements would be, if we would have to share the double-bed – because that would obviously have been terrible for an entire week, but as if he could read my thoughts he said;
"Don't worry, there's a sofa bed in the living room. I'll take that, and you can have the bedroom to yourself."
Oh.
"Sounds good."
It was a very cosy cottage, with a beautiful view towards the lake through the living room windows.
"Come, let's check outside too."
He took my hand to pull me with him, but the second after let go as if he had realised a mistake and instead only gestured in the direction outdoors. He seemed happy to be here, happy to share this place with me.
"Do you come here often?"
"I did for a while, when I was not feeling so well. Especially after the divorce, when things caught up with me and I realised I needed to spend time alone and deal with my past. Then I often came here, to enjoy the nature and calmness, do some fishing and think. I find it very peaceful here, but I haven't been here for some time."
It did not sound like a place where he ever had brought any women before. I quite liked the thought of that.
"I'm glad to be here with you, but I wish it was under other circumstances", he added.
Such a simple sentence to say, but of course it set my mental cog wheels in motion, trying to figure out in which ways he would have wished it different. Only because I was on the run, or in some other way? I refrained from asking.
"I'm glad to be here. I needed to get away from everything and I really appreciate this. Thanks for taking me here."
"No problem."
We walked down to the lake. There was a jetty and a small rowboat was tied to it. The water surface was completely still, mirroring the surrounding trees and the sky. It was early autumn and all the leaves remained on the trees but had started shifting into a yellow, orange and rusty colour palette. It was a very beautiful scenery.
"The water will still be warm this early in the autumn because the lake it quite shallow", he said. "So, you can take a swim if you like."
"I didn't bring a swimsuit."
"You can go swimming in your underwear. I won't look, I promise", he smirked.
It seemed like this peaceful place was filled with mines, at least if one was equipped with my imagination. Now I pictured him going for a swim, coming out of the water, dripping and handsome, with one hand raking through his wet locks in slow motion. I cleared my throat.
"We'll see about that. I'm quite coward when it comes to bathing."
That was a big fat lie, I loved to swim and was happy to do so even when it was cold. I had not learned how to swim until some years ago when I took a course in crawling, but now I found it a relaxing way of exercising. I just was not sure I would be comfortable doing it in his company. Not only would it be hard to keep my hands off him, he would see me nearly naked too. I look okay I guess but not like I'm very comfortable showing off nearly undressed to handsome strangers, or handsome guys I know and who happen to be my bodyguard who I have an inappropriate crush on.
"Really? Anyway, we can go fishing too."
"I have never."
"You've never gone fishing?"
I shrugged my shoulders.
"City kid, you know."
He laughed.
"Okay, then we need to teach you a thing or two while you're here. Fishing and swimming is on top of the list of skills to improve, maybe I'll throw in a cooking class or two as well. I seem to remember that you said you were good at many things, but I don't know if I believe that. You haven't given me any proof really", he winked.
God, why did he have to go there again? I realised that now, when the reverence and respect that came from me being his superior had somehow worn off a bit due to the things we had been through together, in combination with this environment which was his ball court, he was a real tease. I both enjoyed it and disliked it. I would have enjoyed it much more if he had been teasing someone else than me. Now I felt a bit like an earthworm wriggling on a hook, which was suitable considering the fishing theme. How was I supposed to survive a week like this? I just snorted in response, turned my back to him and walked out on the jetty. I could see small fish swimming underneath the surface of the clear water and thought I would at least prove to him that I was an excellent fisherman, or woman, so I could shut him up in some way.
"It's so serene here. Really beautiful view", I said.
"It is."
Something in his voice made me look up quickly and I caught him watching me with dark, warm eyes. A look that nearly made me stop breathing and turned my knees into jelly, but he just shifted his gaze out over the lake indicating that he too had been talking about the scenery, nothing else.
"Should we go and bring the stuff from the car inside?"
We fetched my small bag and all the groceries. I laughed again at the abundance of food, it barely fit into the fridge. It was already getting darker and he proposed that we should start cooking. I had hoped he would cut me some slack this first evening, but no, he had me chopping all sorts of vegetables.
"No, you can't chop the onion like that, it will be too big pieces. First in halves, then like this…"
He took his teaching mission seriously, it almost evoked his stern officer voice again. I mostly enjoyed having him close to me in the small space that was the kitchen and was willing to put up with him being a bit bossy.
"How come you can't cook? You didn't have someone preparing your meals for you before you became the Home Secretary, did you?" he wondered incredulous at my apparent lack of skill, pointing a wooden ladle at me, almost accusingly.
"No, of course not. I prepared most meals for me and my brothers and sisters when we grew up, it was just that it mainly consisted of marmite toast and canned beans. It's hard to become a gourmet chef with such limited options. Later, when I started earning money, I mostly ate out or ordered take away. When I lived with Roger, he had a house keeper slash cook of course. It would have been beneath him to cook."
He snorted.
"I still can't wrap my head around that you have been married to him."
"We all make mistakes, I suppose."
"It just seems to me you deserve so much better."
"Oh… Thanks." A lump emerged in my throat and I was grateful when he changed topic.
"Would you like a glass of wine?"
A whole bottle would be nice - and very much needed.
"Yes, please."
He uncorked a bottle of red and poured me a glass. I loved to watch him do things, uncork the wine, stir the casserole, just so normal yet amazingly sexy in everything he did.
"You won't have some wine?"
He had only poured a glass for me.
"No… even if this feels more like vacation, I consider myself on duty. I want to stay alert, so I don't drink."
I manged to forget again and again that I was his job, and every time he reminded me, I felt like a balloon which someone slowly emptied of air until it became completely deflated.
"Of course. Thank you, for looking out for me."
Still, while we ate, I managed to forget myself again. It was too easily done. He had lit some candles, the food was delicious and he was just the best company. I could not have asked for anything more from a date. When I had finished my plate, I put down my fork and wiped my mouth with a napkin, then sat circling the brim of my glass with my index finger and could not help commenting on it.
"You know, this is the dinner most resembling a date that I have been to in years."
"Really?"
I looked up at him. His chiselled features seemed softened in the candle light, and his brown eyes less piercing, almost gooey, even if it was just a trick of light. This was really ridiculously romantic - for being work, I mean.
"Otherwise I always have company of my bodyguards…you know like when you and Kim sat watching me and Rob. It's always like that, having eyes on me. It does not really make for a natural date. This is the first time in forever I'm just having dinner with one other person… unless we count when we had burgers you and me. Even though it's not a date it's nice."
"So, you would have had a successful date with Rob if we had not been watching?"
"That's what you made out of what I just said? Noooo!", I giggled. "He totally ambushed me. I never wanted a date with him. It was so embarrassing when I realised that he had cancelled the evening for the others who should have been there. First, I thought I could just live through dinner with him anyway, but then I realised that I couldn't do it with yo…"
I interrupted myself. I had not been able to do it with his eyes on me, I had not wanted him to think I enjoyed a date with Rob."
"What?"
"…with you and Kim waiting for me when I didn't even want to be there."
"We wait for you all the time, it wouldn't have been the end of the world."
No, I guess it wouldn't have been to him.
"Well, I wasn't in the mood anyway, so it was a good excuse. Do you have another glass of wine?"
I desperately needed it.
Finally, we got up from the table and did the dishes. He lit a fire and we chose a book each from the living room shelves and just sat reading for a while, listening to the relaxing crackle from the fire. I'm not sure if I actually registered what I was reading or only flipped pages at a reasonable pace, because the fact that we sat opposite one another in the sofa with our legs mingled was very distracting. There was no other way to sit really, as the sofa was not that big, so it was completely justified. In the end I was too exhausted to stay up longer even if I did not want to break this up.
"I think I'm going to bed now."
"Then so am I. Here in the sofa I mean", he felt it necessary to clarify.
"I can take the sofa, I'm much smaller than you and you probably sleep better in the bed."
"I wouldn't be much of a host or gentleman then, would I?"
"Okay, thanks then. And thanks for today… It's been really nice, which was unexpected given the circumstances."
"It has."
It almost felt like I ought to hug him good night or kiss him on the cheek, but I would not want him thinking that I was trying to repeat what I had done in the hotel room, so I just gave him a smile, went into the bedroom and closed the door, but I did not fall asleep for long. I lay wide awake staring at the ceiling through the darkness, thought of him, how he had been today, how much I liked him, that he was sleeping only a few feet away in that sofa and that I wished he was lying here instead and that it was odd, yet lovely to be here in this cottage alone with him. This week would not do the trick for me falling out of love with him, that was for sure.
