Hirundine: Thank you so much for your review! You have no idea how happy it made me. And don't worry, all will be revealed!

This surprised me, though - I thought I'd fleshed out Cristine a little more than Nick. Maybe it was just all in my head ^_^


THE RIDE BACK down to the Protectorate was even scarier than the ride up. Stella very nearly crashed the Starflight in the crown of a bright blue tree near Alltrades Abbey. I was still shaking when we reached the top of the Abbey's huge flight of stairs.

Stella fluttered off to search for someone – "old fatguts", as she'd said on the Starflight. I hadn't the slightest idea how she expected to find him, but as long as it got the faerie off our backs, I was happy.

The inside of the abbey was open and airy, with the sound of running water filling the air. But I only had a moment to notice that, because hardly a second after I stepped in, I was tackled by a slim brunette figure in a bright dress.

"Tammy!" Cristine cried. "Oh, thank the Almighty you're back! I knew you would be all right, but I couldn't help worrying…"

I didn't bother trying to detach myself. I just looked at her and grinned. "You ought to know there's no point in that," I said. "I wouldn't let anything get me. Besides, what would it say about our friendship if I let myself be eaten by a monster?"

She smiled. "Not much."

Nick nodded to me politely. Before Cristine let go of me and stepped back, she murmured, "Tammy, is it all right if I talk to you when you have a moment?"

"Um, sure," I replied. "What about?"

She shook her head very slightly.

I blinked.

"Is there anything of interest occurring here?" Erik asked.

Cristine nodded, turning her attention to him. "Abbot Jack's gone."

"Gone?" I asked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean he's not at the abbey," Cristine said. "He was gone before we got here yesterday afternoon. Apparently, he's been away for several days now, and no one knows where he is. The whole abbey's in an uproar."

I looked around. If this is an uproar, I thought, it's the quietest one I've ever seen. But as I watched, I realised that Cristine's words had a grain of truth in them. People were scurrying round the place like they were on some urgent business. All of the abbey's clergy looked worried, much as they seemed to be trying to hide it. Anyway, even if they hadn't shown it, I could hear it a bit. I seemed to be getting more perceptive. I wasn't entirely sure that was a good thing.

"Hm," I said. "D'you reckon there's anything we can do to help?"

"Well, not right now," Cristine said, smiling. "It's nearly eight thirty. It'll be dark soon. But I'm sure we could speak to the head priest. He's the one who took charge after Abbot Jack vanished."

So that was what we did. The head priest, a black-haired man dressed in a red robe, was standing at the back of the abbey, looking very concerned. Behind him was a Guardian statue and a rectangular pool.

"Welcome to Alltrades Abbey," he said when he noticed here. "Are you here to change your vocation?"

Erik shook his head. "We wondered if there was anything we could do to assist in the search for Abbot Jack," he said, "and also to ask if you have seen a golden fruit."

Cristine and Nick looked at him in surprise, but I just tried to resist the urge to roll my eyes. He was good at working what he wanted into what everyone else did.

The priest scratched at his beard. "Well, I don't know about the abbot," he said, "but as it happens, he was given a fruit that might match that description by someone who came for a change of vocation. I think the person in question is still here in the Abbey somewhere. Ask around, and perhaps you'll find something out."

We thanked him and left, but this time I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "Well, at least we found something out," I said. "Erik, seriously?"

"What?" he asked peevishly. "We must find the fyggs; I see no harm in doing so at the same time as we help others."

I shook my head wordlessly as we headed down the stairs towards the abbey's inn. It was late enough that there wouldn't be much point in asking about the abbot – or the fygg – that night. We'd have to start in the morning.

Cristine and Nick seemed understandably confused. Cristine didn't say anything, but Nick asked, "So what're these fygg things you need to find?"

Erik stiffened. But his voice was normal as he said, "Some things I was tasked with finding. It is rather a personal endeavour. I am afraid I cannot explain beyond that. Now, if no one minds, I will find a bed for the night."

He walked off, leaving us behind. I rubbed at the bridge of my nose. "I'll never understand him," I muttered. "Strange boy." Though he does have an excuse.

Nick shrugged. "Well, I suppose there's no point in staying up much later," he said. "Are either of you going to bed yet?"

I shook my head. "I'll be up a while longer."

"I'll be in in a moment," Cristine said.

"All right," Nick said, and followed Erik towards the inn.

I looked over at Cristine. "Okay," I said. "What was it that you wanted to talk about?"

"Over here," she replied, heading down the stairs and going right instead of left. I followed her to a small, mostly empty dining hall. We sat down at one of the tables.

For a long moment, we were both silent. Cristine was playing with the funny-looking split sleeve of her new yellow-and-purple top. Finally, to break the silence, I asked, "So where did the new clothes come from?"

"Mm?" Cristine asked, glancing down at the outfit. "Oh - I helped someone out while we were waiting for you and Erik to return. I got this as a reward."

"It...it looks good on you."

"Thanks."

After another silence, one that felt about ten times longer, Cristine took a deep breath and looked up at me. "Tammy," she said quietly, "I need to talk to you."

"Erm...I figured as much?"

Contrary to what I'd expected, though, my usually cheerful friend didn't laugh - not even a little bit. She bit her lip and glanced away.

"Hey, I'm sorry," I said, a guilty pit forming in my stomach. "Come on, Cristine. What's got you all knotted up?" I could hear her discomfort - and an array of other things which only came out as confusion.

Cristine didn't look back at me. "Look, I..." she said, and then sighed. "It's just... I don't... Why are you so lonely?"

Whatever I'd been expecting her to say, it definitely wasn't that. I blinked and fumbled for words for a moment. All I could come up with in the end was, "What do you mean, lonely? I'm with people all the time - you more than anyone. How can I be lonely if I'm with someone?" It was the same thing I'd said to the Faerie, but this time I knew it wasn't entirely true.

Cristine seemed to know that, too. "You are," she said, her delicate eyebrows knotted with concern. "You shut everyone out - me, Nick, Patty, everyone! You never tell anyone anything real about yourself. And when you have trouble, you go off on your own when there are plenty of people around who can help you. Why!?"

I bit my lip uncomfortably as the words and the desperate concern of the song in my mind crashed down on me. "Cristine, I..."

"Please, don't give me an excuse," Cristine said, looking at me. "I understand that you might not be ready to talk about whatever it is, but you have to realise that there are other people out in the world, and some of them care about you! Shutting people out won't get you anywhere." She looked down, letting her brown ringlets fall across her face. The tempo slowed, changing from desperate to sad. "You're my best friend, Tammy. But I can't even say I miss you when you do things like that, because I've never really known you." She looked back up at me. "I just want to know why!"

"Cristine..." I murmured, my body slumping. I moved my hand, thinking about touching her shoulder reassuringly, but I hesitated. I didn't know how she'd take it.

So I drew my hand back and said, "I...I want to tell you. But I can't. I'm not ready, I don't know how...and it's not all mine to tell." My mind went to the Faerie wood, the emotion-songs I heard, my ability to see Celestrians. How could I ever explain that to an ordinary human?

But looking at Cristine's sad figure, I felt myself tear up. She was right. The Faerie was right. I was lonely. But I didn't know how to stop being that way.

Cristine looked at me sadly. "I was afraid of that," she murmured. She smiled sadly. "I'm sorry."

"So am I," I said quietly. "Believe me. You have no idea how sorry I am." I tried to smile, but I was afriad it came across as more of a grimace. That was how it felt, anyway. "Some friend I am."

"Don't say that," Cristine told me. She stood up and moved to hug me. I couldn't hug her back - she'd pinned my arms to my sides - but I pressed my head against one of her arms, trying to express everything I was feeling in that one gesture. It couldn't have worked half as well as I wanted it too.

"Goodnight, Tammy."

And she let go and walked away.


After talking to a few people in the Abbey the next morning, we went back to the head priest with what we'd found out. Well, what Nick had found out. Neither Cristine nor I had been up to much speaking, and Erik was being himself - meaning he had little desire to speak with mortals.

"Ah, it's you," the priest said.

"Yes, sir," Nick said, taking charge. "We found out what happened to the Abbot. He left the abbey after he ate that fruit we mentioned yesterday."

The priest blinked in surprise. "What?" he asked. "Are you sure?"

Erik nodded. "Sir, it harbours a strange power," he said. "It would likely have a strange effect should it be consumed."

"I see..." murmured the priest. "Well..."

After a moment of thought, he seemed to think of something. "Of course! The Tower of Trades!" he cried.

"The what?" I asked.

"The Tower of Trades," the priest repeated. "Legend tells that it is where the vocation-changing rite was carried out in days of yore, but now it is overrun with monsters. Under normal circumstances, the Abbot would never have considered venturing into such a dangerous place, but...well, if you say this fruit may have afforded him magical powers, perhaps his curiosity finally got the better of him. Oh, dear!" He hesitated, looking us over. Then he said, "I, I don't like to ask, but there is no one else... Could you possibly go to the tower and bring the Abbot back? We men of the cloth are neither equipped nor incline to battle monsters. Please, I implore you to help!"

Erik, Cristine, Nick and I looked around at each other, but it wasn't exactly a tough decision. "Certainly," Erik said, looking back at the priest.

"Oh, thank you!" he replied. "Before you go, let me teach you the secret was to enter the tower. You must stand at the entrance and take a bow. Just one will suffice. The Tower of Trades is to the east of Alltrades Abbey. May the Almighty watch over you and guide you to the Abbot!"


The walk to the Tower of Trades wasn't much fun. The weather was nicer than it had been - spring's capricious behaviour was working in our favour - but we were all quiet. Erik was thinking about something, I could tell; Cristine and I were both feeling too awkward to say anything to one another; Nick was just walking along, taking our silence in stride but looking at all of us oddly.

So, since we were all silent, I joined Erik in thinking. The only problem was that I had no idea what to think about. My dream from the Observatory was too confusing for me to be able to wrap much of my brain around it. All I was sure about was that it had been real - there was no way it had been some strange concoction of my subconscious. I just didn't know what it meant.

And then there was this...longing.

When Catarrhina had gone on, I'd heard her song, and that had been what had started it. It didn't make much sense. Usually, when I helped a spirit on, I felt what they'd been feeling - that was why I always had so much trouble after I helped one that had been held on the earth by sadness. But if that was the case, then what I was feeling ought to have been the beautiful emotion that her song had inspired in me. Instead, I felt empty, like there was something important missing from my soul. The strangest part, though, was how familiar it was - like I'd always felt it, but had only noticed it when, for the brief span of that song, the missing piece was filled.

You were not made to be alone, Tamara.

Somehow, the two fit together. The longing and the dream were connected, however tenuously. But I couldn't figure out how. All thinking about it did was exacerbate my confusion and the sense of longing.

You must forget your lonliness.

I didn't know how. But I hadn't lied to Cristine the night before: I wanted to forget. I'd needed to be lonely for a long time, and even though I didn't need to any more, it was hard to get out of the habit.

After all, you didn't easily forget how to keep yourself safe once you'd learnt the first time.


The Tower of Trades would have been creepy if it hadn't been for all the light the windows let in. There was almost no evidence of it ever having been inhabited by humans, and the priest had been right - it was overrun by monsters. We made our way through the corridors carefully, trying not to attract any more attention than absolutely necessary. Fortunately, we managed to avoid getting into fights, aside from one little brawl with a very grumpy slime knight.

At the top of the tower, we paused and looked around. There was no sign of the abbot. There was, however, a very odd sight leading off the edge of the tower in front of us: a path of light that led to what looked like an empty doorway.

"Twenty gold says we have to go through there to find Abbot Jack," I said.

"I'll see that twenty and raise you five," Cristine said, smiling slightly. "Anyone else have money to put in?"

Nick laughed. "I think there's something somewhere about priests not gambling."

"But you're not a priest yet," Cristine said.

I smiled at the back-and-forth and glanced at Erik, who was watching it, almost seeming amused. I looked at him for a moment, surprised. Huh.

But then he caught me looking at me and shook his head like he was clearing it. "Let us see if that is where the abbot is," he said, gesturing to the doorway.

He strode forwards. Before he stepped onto the path, though, he hesitated for a half a second, glancing down. Then he straightened his shoulders and walked out.

"It is safe," he called back.

We followed him out onto the path. It was perfectly solid, but the light didn't obscure the view of the drop beneath our feet. The sight made my stomach clench uncomfortably. None of us were eager to stay out there, but we were all even more scared to step through the doorway.

In the end, it was Nick who went through first, though only very slowly. He put one foot through the doorway. The foot disappeared immediately, along with the rest of the leg that went through the door. But whatever was on the other side was solid. Nick tested his weight, and then stepped through the rest of the way, disappearing. We were quick to follow him. The air in the doorway felt thick, like stepping through water, except that I didn't get wet. When I came out on the other side, I couldn't see the same thing I'd seen through the door.

We were standing on a large stone platform, which was surrounded by a strange, colourful sheen. A grey-haired man in abbot's robes stood in the centre of the platform: Abbot Jack, no doubt. His hands were out in front of him, and I could hear him murmuring.

"Almighty power that commands all trades... O mysterious force that drives the wind of change..." He raised his right arm. "Come! Come to me n - Hm!?"

Erik had sneezed, distracting the abbot from his prayer. I almost wanted to laugh - holier-than-thou Celestrian Erik, sneezing like any old mortal! - except that the look on Abbot Jack's face dissuaded me. His thick grey brows were knotted in anger, and his eyes were wide. He looked more than a bit maddened.

"Who dares interrupt this holy ceremony?" he demanded. "If your purpose is to disrupt the rite, your efforts shall be in vain. None shall interfere with the will of the heavens!"

Then he turned away like Cristine, Nick, Erik and I had never existed. "The power is mine now. The power of supreme guidance. The wisdom to lead my flock along only the brightest of paths. And now I, Abbot Jack of Alltrades Abbey, implore you to grant me yet more power, that I may guide yet more lost souls! Fill me now! Annoint me! Grant me the gift of ultimate guidance!"

A small blue light flashed in the sky. But then it winked out and, with a loud rushing noise, dark energy and light began to swirl around him. All of us shrank back. The pattern of the energy and the lightning was too familiar to me - it was the same pattern as Morag's curse, the same as the dark light that had started all of this.

But the abbot didn't seem to see the danger. "Yes...YES!" he cried. "The power comes... Let it consume me!"

I shivered, trying to block the malevolence of the light from my mind as it closed in a dome over the abbot's shape. Dark, disturbing chords in a jarring rhythm sawed at my nerves, already raw from thinking on the trip to the tower.

A tall shape rose beneath the dome, taking the place of the abbot's plain form.

"Wh-What is this...?" came his voice, but it was different. It had undertones of the same dark tune playing through my head. "What have I become? This hideous form...am I a...a monster...? This...darkness... This...black power... It is not what I wished for..."

The darkness vaporised, but the dark music still played. A tall, bluish-purple figure kneeled where the abbot had been before the light.

"But perhaps..." it murmured. "Yes...hm hm hm... I see now. It is through tyranny and fear that I shall ensure my charges follow the righteous path!" His voice thundered on those words. Then he rose and turn in an impossibly quick motion, but fortunately he didn't seem to notice us. "I am no longer Jack of Alltrades!" he cried. "I am become Master of Nu'Un, and all will learn to obey me...or suffer my wrath!"

Then he noticed the four of us at the edge of the platform. "Hm hm hm," he chuckled softly. The sound made my stomach turn. "Well, well. What perfect timing. I was just looking for a subject on whom to test the true extent of my new-found power." He moved into a readier stance, holding one clawed hand up by his chest. "I wonder, will you allow me to guide you on the righteous path...or will you suffer the consequences of disobedience?"

I flicked my left wrist and my whip uncoiled. We leapt into action.

We had to make full use of the size of the platform as we tried to avoid the once-abbot's lightning-quick attacks. Erik seemed to have a skill for making sure he was out of Jack's range of vision at all times, and managed to land some excellent blows, but more than once he obtained injuries from accidental movements of the spike-tipped tail. Cristine's gymnastic skills proved useful as well, and the four of us managed to hold our ground against our much larger opponent. Nick proved himself fearless as he dodged around, risking Jack's attacks as he healed us and landed blows of his own.

An especially impressive blow managed to knock him back and down onto his knees. Without hesitation, Cristine cast Crack, and the icicle crashed down onto the abbot's head. As he struggled to get up, I noticed a strange haze around him. It solidified into streams of darkness, flowing out and away from him.

"Nooooo!" he cried. "My power! My new-found power!"

The darkness gathered into a cloud around him and then exploded to reveal the abbot, back to his human form, lying on the platform. He looked a bit of a mess, but otherwise he seemed unharmed.

"Urgh..." he moaned. Slowly, he rose, holding his book in one hand and with the other held to his forehead. He looked around. "W-What am I doing here...?" he murmured. The he glanced at us. "And who...are you? Why are you here?"

We looked around at each other doubtfully. Then Cristine glanced back at the abbot. "We, erm..." she said, "we were searching for a shining fruit."

Abbot Jack blinked. "Yes, of course," he said. "I ate a shining fruit and...I remember very little after that..." He looked down. "I only remember a terrifying feeling that I was...losing myself..."

Erik was looking at the abbot, his silvery brows furrowed like he was thinking. "You remember nothing?" he asked. When the abbot shook his head, Erik rattled off the story in his usual fashion. The abbot recoiled in shock.

"Hm?" he asked. He seemed appalled. I bit my lip. The dark music in the back of my mind had vanished with the cloud of black energy, but now there was another jarring tune: shock and horror. This was a fun day for music...

Cristine spoke more gently: "It was the fruit, sir. It's not anything normal. There was nothing you could have done about it."

"I see..." Jack murmured. Then, slowly, he began walking back towards the abbey, murmuring something about lost souls. I was distracted from him by a gleam in the corner of my eye. I glanced over to see a shining golden fruit materialise in the middle of the platform. My eyes went wide.

"Look at that!" exclaimed Stella, popping out to full size. "It's only a flapping fygg! But I thought that addled old Abbot said he'd eaten it..."

Erik crossed swiftly and picked the fygg up. I looked at it, almost feeling awed. It wasn't shining really, but it looked so impossibly real that it seemed to make everything around it dull and transparent by comparison.

There was a soft gasp from Cristine. "That's the fruit the abbot ate?" she whispered. "What...what is it?"

Nick shrugged, seeming as transfixed as the rest of us.

"...Hm," Stella said. "You've got your hands on a fygg at last. I'm over the moon for you, but... I can't help worrying after seeing what eating one can do to even a mild-mannered old mortal like the Abbot... Ah, well." She shrugged. "Not much we can do about it, eh? Let's get back to the Abbey."


As we walked back along the path to Alltrades, Nick said, "So what are these fruits you're gathering? They don't exactly seem like a normal collector's item."

Erik looked around at him. "Hm?" he asked. "Oh. The fyggs." He hesitated. "They...I was asked to gather them by an old aquaintance whom I greatly admire. They are very important to him, and immensely dangerous in the wrong hands. Such as those of the abbot. They have a...particular potency."

"It sounds like a drug," Cristine murmured.

I shrugged. "Well, you wouldn't know the danger to look at them," I said. "They look...just wow."

"Mm." Erik looked ahead. "Either way, they are dangerous. We need to retrieve them before more people like Abbot Jack fall victim to their power."

We kept walking in silence. Erik had gone back to his thoughts. I wondered what had him so absorbed. He'd been doing that ever since we'd left the Observatory.

But then I sighed inaudibly. It wasn't like I was one to talk about keeping things to myself.

It looked like we were both having to deal with our secret worries.


Okay, I am absolutely in shock - I did not think I was going to finish this chapter soon enough to post this weekend! I didn't get much chance to write this week, and I've been a little absorbed by my original story, too. But I got inspired today after a few very cheering e-mails. One was my first review (Thanks again, Hirundine!) and the other was one awesome enough to make me go teenager-y, hand-flail-ly, and giggly: it was from an agent to whom I'd sent a query letter about my first full-length original story. It wasn't a full acceptance, but she asked to see the first five pages of the manuscript and it was the first thing I've gotten that wasn't a rejection. So, all in all, I've had a pretty great day! Unlike Tammy...

Well, hopefully I'll get more chance to write this week. This last-second panic gets things done, but I'd like to be able to take my time for once!

May all the bodies of the heavens watch over you!