Chapter 2: THE THRILL IS GONE

Husband, wake up its, your turn to get Mercy. Ben, said Adrian as he slowly turned and looked at his young latina wife with tired eyes. What, he said as he looked into Adrian's beautiful toffee eyes, and smiled. Mercy is crying and its your turn to get her she said smiling at him. I know, he said as he removed the covers and got up to go and check on his infant daughter. Hurry up and calm her, I think I'm feeling frisky and could use some sausage, or some sausage prince, replied Adrian with a mischievous grin. You do know our daughter is in the next room right, Ben, said with a smile.

Well we'll have to be very quiet then wont we Adrian replied. Ben, looked at his beautiful wife and turned to go and check on Mercy. He opened the door to the nursery and slowly walked to the crib, where he heard a crying Mercy. He looked in to see a small child with very lightly tanned skin, black hair, and eyes which resembled his own moving within the crib staring up at him. He picked her up and held her to him closely, and marveled at how much like her mother she seemed.

I guess I have a way with both of you Ben said as he nestled Mercy in his arms. He walked Mercy back to his room, and pushed open the door to be met with a horrible sight of Adrian in bed with, Jack, Ricky, and Henry. They were all over her touching and kissing her and she seemed to enjoy it. Adrian! He screamed. She only turned to look at him and smile as she still enjoyed the three men ravishing her. He then looked down at Mercy only to see an empty blanket, and rushed from their bedroom, back to the nursery.

When he opened the door, an empty room full of holes and the echo of his own voice from the horrible things he told to Adrian, when she cleaned out the nursery. He dropped to his knees in freight as his own voice boomed in his ears. BEN! BEN! BEN! Wake up, he heard Alice scream as he opened his eyes to find her sitting on his bed looking at him with a worried expression.

As Adrian drove into her parents drive way she noticed the light in the kitchen was on and she could see both her parents in the kitchen. She knocked on the back door and opened it slowly before walking in. Her parents stopped their conversation as she came in, and looked at their daughter whom they saw was still distraught and guilty over the events of the day. So I guess you both already know, huh replied Adrian. Yes, sweetheart we do. Grace called us and told us that we should be on the look out for you in case you stopped by. Well, I guess this is just a repeat of everything I have always done, messed up my life and everyone else's.

Adrian, you haven't ruined your life, or anyone else's, but you have hurt yourself, and your relationship with Ben a lot, Reuben told her as he hugged his daughter close to him. I know Dad, she replied as she allowed herself to be comforted by her father. Her mother just stood and looked at her daughter with a look of disappointment on her face. When Adrian saw her she broke from her fathers hug and stood in front of Cindy awaiting her mothers' reply.

Why Adrian, was all Cindy could say when looking at her daughter. I don't know Mom, when I kissed Ricky, I felt nothing. And when Omar left I thought, great another disaster for me. But, then Ben as usual came to my rescue and we danced. And, I remembered how good it felt to be in his arms. How no matter how much I felt bad when he holds me I feel safer, and protected.

When the song was over we talked and he left me to be with some other girl. I got so angry, at him for that. Even though I told him to go, I just couldn't stand seeing him with her. So, when Henry came and started talking to me, we had a few drinks, I just thought why not. If Ben, can have fun with someone else why can't I. But, Adrian you were the one who wanted to end your marriage.

You, told him that you wanted Ricky, and you were he one who went to the party with Omar and kissed Ricky. Why, did you feel as if you had to punish Ben, for your mistake? Because, it was easier to let o of him she replied. Because, after that dance I realized I messed up. I messed up, our friendship, our pregnancy, and our marriage. But, here he was still trying to save me from myself. I didn't want him to save me anymore. I wanted him to stay away from me before I messed up his life anymore than I already had.

I was the one who went to the car that night and seduced him, after he found out about the kiss. I knew, that it would be easy for me to take advantage of him, and take from Amy, what she took from me. Then I got pregnant and ruined both our relationships. But, he still didn't blame me. Instead he forgave me, and became the boyfriend, and man I always dreamed of. He took me and made me feel special, like I was the woman of is dreams.

He wasn't ashamed to be seen with me in public, and was proud to show me off. He didn't even mind or seemed embarrassed that I was pregnant, or how I got pregnant. Or about my past, he actually seemed happy to be with me. He made me feel loved, and wanted. He got down on one knee and gave me the most beautiful and romantic proposal anyone could ever ask for. He married me just to make me happy and take care of our child. I couldn't even give him the child we both wanted.

When I needed him most he was there, even though he didn't have to be. I knew he was sad and upset over what happened but he got up everyday for three months to take care of me. He wasn't ready to go back to school or work , but he went all to try and help me. And what do I do. I try and seduce him into staying. I erase our daughter from our home. And I try to manipulate him into sleeping with me to get me pregnant so I could keep him.

And when he is finally ready to try and make our marriage work I turn around and break his heart again all because of my obsession with a man that has never treated me than anything more than his WHORE. All the while Amy is just standing there and laughing while I am humiliated and left there like that. And Ben as usual becomes my prince and saves me again. He doesn't need me mom. He deserves better, and I deserve worse. Maybe now both of us can move on, and I can stop causing him pain.

Cindy, was shocked and taken by surprise by her daughters confession to her. Reuben was even more surprised by hall that Adrian, had said. For so long he was guilty over having abandoned is family and how proud e was of his daughters maturity, and resilient spirit . But, after that statement he realized that Adrian, only pretended to be so resilient. That she was indeed no more than a lonely little girl that wanted, and needed to be loved.

When she finally found it, however she was broken and let down by so many others she did not truly have the maturity to accept it. Cindy also took in Adrian's words, and truly realized the effect her lifestyle had on her daughter. She was the one that would abandon Adrian to others and never truly explained love or relationships to her because after Reuben, she herself lost faith in love, and did not show that to Adrian.

Having been shunned by her family she guessed she never really allowed herself to truly love her daughter, and that lack of love forced Adrian to search for it in all the wrong places. Only Antonio that sweet boy she met before she moved to this town ever truly appreciated Adrian. She liked him, and she also guessed that's why she liked Ben so much. Those two were so similar. They were both kind, respectable, gentle, and loved her daughter for who she was despite all her flaws.

Adrian looked at her parents, and asked to be allowed to sleep in her old room she did not have the heart or the energy to go home and sleep in the condo, where she, Mercy, and Ben were supposed to have made their home. As, Adrian made her way upstairs she stopped short to listen to the conversation being made by her parents downstairs. I blame myself for this Reuben.

If I had taken a better interest in our daughter and raised her like a real mother none of this would have ever happened, spoke Cindy angrily. Maybe if I had searched for a job or worked two jobs I could have been there to take care of her and show her what type of man she needed in her life and that way she could better understand it. Then she and Ben could have met under better circumstances and fallen in love, and Adrian would have appreciated it. No, Cindy replied Reuben, this is my fault my love. If I had been there I could have helped you so you wouldn't have had to work as much, and helped you.

I could have kept all the bad guys away from both you and our daughter, and showed Adrian all the good ones. Reuben, sweetheart, it is both our fault, Cindy said as she looked at her husband. If both of us would have stopped being so selfish and put our daughters need in front of our own she would be better off. In stead we chose our careers over her needs, and she was left to raise herself.

You know who else I blame for all this, Cindy said as she and her husband held one another. Who Reuben asked as he looked at her quizzically. Amy, and Ricky. What? Reuben wondered why those two. Because every mistake and hurtful moment in either Ben or Adrian's life has always involved one of them or both of them. Ricky slept with Adrian and continued to play with her heart and mess with her head, while still playing daddy for Amy and John. Amy did the same to Ben without even sleeping with him, she only kept the idea of sex in his head and just strung him along.

If those two had just broken up with both Ben and Adrian when they found out Amy was pregnant instead of playing those cat and mouse games with one another perhaps those two would not have been so unstable when they got together if they had gotten together at all. Well I have to admit that does make sense. I still wonder if Ricky had not kissed Amy would we actually be having this conversatioN, Reuben replied.

I wonder would our daughter have saw Ben for the man of her dreams if he hadn't, replied Cindy. Even though, they are so young and they are so different I sometimes wonder if that night was for the best. Even though she was pregnant and still in high school, while they were together I sensed that our daughter was truly happy with Ben despite the situation, she said as Cindy hugged Reuben.

Adrian slowly and quietly made her way to her room after that statement. She opened her bedroom door, closed it and laid down in her familiar bed. She then took out her necklace which held her wedding band, and looked at the engraving. TO MY ANGEL ON EARTH written in Spanish. Ben had called her that in private, his angel. Not even Grace knew about that nickname, it was her and Ben's secret.

She thought it was ironic that he called her that especially after all the things she had done were nowhere near angelic. But, Ben told her once that when she looked at him it was as if he was being stared at by an angel. Yeah a fallen angel she smirked. But, it felt nice to her that he saw he like that, and even called her that when no one else was near. Her mother was right, despite her condition at the time, her time with Ben when she was pregnant was the happiest she had ever been, not even Antonio made her feel like Ben.

He was so gentle and naïve, yet he was so mature and considerate for his age that she thought he should be called an angel. She laid down on her pillow and slowly began to recall the night that led to all of their drama. The night she snuck outside and took his virginity, in a moment of vengeance, to others but in her own secret it was more for her desire.

Ben looked at Alice and wiped the sweat from his forehead, as he sat up and recovered from his dream. He came to his senses and realized that although it had been a dream, he was in a living nightmare. Adrian had slept with all his friends and he was still married to her and their daughter never got to cry in her nursery.

Alice sat next to Ben with her hair down and wearing a black tank with a surprisingly short skirt and sandals. Her make up was also done and she was wearing a perfume that Hank had bought her for her birthday. Ben recognized the scent sense he spent an hour in the perfume department, with him both looking for a bottle of perfume which matched their girlfriends one for Alice and one for Adrian. He looked at her and marveled at how pretty she looked tonight and wondered why she looked like that.

Hi Alice, he said as he shook the sleep from his groggy head and came to his full alertness. What are you doing here so late, Ben asked. I came to check on you and see how you were, she replied. I 'm fine still adjusting, but I'm not drunk or hung over if that is what you are asking. Yeah, well that is a good thing she replied as she moved closer to him and sat next to him on his bed.

So, did you come from a date or are you going on a date, Ben asked. Neither I just saw the only guy I have ever dated in bed with a girl who was married to my best friend. So, no I came here to be there for my best friend, she stated. I mean Henry and I had broken up, and I know you and Adrian split up, but, Ben you are still in love with her I know that.

Ben, looked at her with his saddened, brown eyes, and realized he couldn't hide his feelings from someone who knew him so well. Yeah, but the same can be said for you and Henry. You still love him and you definitely didn't deserve that. I mean you two have been together for so long, and now after all this time he decides to break up with you just to sleep around, he said.

Well, I'm not that surprised, replied Alice. I kind of knew that Henry wasn't happy with being with me forever. He always did envy and kind of idolize Ricky's lifestyle, you know opposite the being committed to his baby's mother and all, she spoke. Well, I guess sleeping with Adrian and betraying his best friend and hurting the woman he claims to have loved has hi on a very good start, Ben said.

I'm so sorry replied Alice, I wish you didn't have to go through this Ben. No, Alice it's not your fault, you have nothing to apologize for, if I hadn't have brought this drama into our lives you, me, and Henry would be in my room having our annual sleep over. Well, Alice said in a seductive voice, we can still have a sleepover, and we can pretend that Henry, was never here as she straddled herself across Ben, and began to kiss him passionately.