A/N: The Following is rated SA; for situational awareness.

It corresponds, chronologically, with events from S2E13 "The Drill."

Reader discretion is advised.


Chapter 12 "Tales of Ba Sing Se"


Spring, year 11 in the Reign of Fire-Lord Ozai

The morning after his fight with Jet, Zuko and Iroh found themselves awoken by a loud series of knocks that sounded at their apartment door, even before the sun rose.

The night before had actually passed rather smoothly. After Jet had been dragged off, kicking and practically frothing at the mouth, Pao had bought Zuko and Iroh dinner in thanks for both protecting his shop, and ensuring that the entire district, perhaps the whole western half of the lower ring, now knew that Iroh was the finest tea-maker in the city.

Zuko became convinced that if he rolled his eye any harder it might actually fall out on to the floor.

That much-abused eye was now fixed on the door of his apartment, while his hand gripped the hilt of his katana and his uncle cheerfully, but cautiously, moved to open it.

The door opened to reveal a member of the town watch (not the public urinator thankfully) and behind him stood the most lavishly dressed woman Zuko had seen since leaving the Palace at Otosan Uchi. Her hair was done up shimada style and was adorned with enough gold hairpins and combs to feed a battalion for a month. Her kimono, which probably could have fed that battalion for a further week or two, was a light green silk and patterned with images of flowers. Despite the fact that her powdered face concealed any marks or wrinkles she was still obviously much older than Zuko, if not any less beautiful for it.

Iroh practically drooled.

"What can this humble tea maker do for you, oh radiant spirit?" Iroh declaimed dramatically, bowing as low as his stomach would allow.

Zuko, who had just the previous night decided to try and roll his eye less, simply exhaled in exasperation.

The woman smiled coyly, and when she spoke it was in a rich and genteel drawl. "I do not suppose you are the ronin Kaiu Ping?"

"Alas, but I am not," Iroh lamented. "The poor dour boy behind me has that honor."

The woman seemed to flow into the room and eyed Zuko up and down, going so far as to circle around him.

"Hmmm," she tapped her chin with an exquisite sandalwood fan. "Yes. I suppose the dichotomy has its appeal," she murmured to herself, her dark eyes fixed on his scar.

"Can I help you?" Zuko growled.

"Nephew!" Iroh gasped as though Zuko had just spat on the floor.

"Mmmmm, and the voice is perfect too," the woman cooed. "Yes. Yes, I simply must have you!"

"I beg your pard-"

"You are a ronin, yes?" she interjected abruptly.

"Ye-"

"And a ronin is always seeking worthy employment, yes?" she said cutting him off again.

"That may be s-"

"Well, I have such a task for you," she said jumping all over his words again.

Zuko just narrowed his eye, refusing to allow her to interrupt him again.

"You are familiar with the term yojimbo, I would hope?"

Zuko nodded. Being a bodyguard was essentially what he did already, if in a less regular and formal capacity than a traditional yojimbo.

"Well, I happen to be the owner if an establishment in the middle ring. Word of your exceptional prowess with the sword made its way to my ears only last night, and I simply had to come and see you for myself and-" her lips turned up in a small smile- "I like what I see."

Iroh began to seethe with envy as Zuko fought back a flush.

Risking being interrupted again Zuko decided to speak. "I was under the impression that things were a great deal safer in the upper rings, Why would you w-"

"Oh darling, it is a great deal safer!" she said, cutting him off again. "But, the watch can't be everywhere at once and, you'll forgive me darlings-" she said this over her shoulder to the two watchmen still standing in the hall- "sometimes it's simply better for business to not get the authorities involved?"

So, she's a criminal?

"My patrons prefer discretion and privacy. And really darling, is that so much to ask for?"

Yep. Criminal.

Zuko narrowed his eye and glared at her.

She pretended to ignore his look and concealed her small smile behind her fan. "I can pay you two koku every second week and can provide you with transit papers to the middle ring."

"He'll take it!" Iroh shouted, grinning widely.

"Uncle!" Zuko snapped.

"What? Last night you said you were broke!" Iroh said, a confused look on his face.

"Oh? Poor dear," the woman cooed, still smirking behind her fan.

Zuko glowered at them both.

"Oh darling, you needn't worry your pretty little head! I would never ask you to do anything that would call your honor into question. After all," she leaned closer, whispering for his ear alone behind her fan. "I know what a priority your people place on honor."

Zuko froze. She knows!

"I'll have your papers sent over this evening," she continued as she swanned towards the door. "Just ask for 'Lady Xian's Palace' at the gate, they know where it is." She stopped in the hallway outside the door. "See you tomorrow darling," she said, winking at him. Then, watchmen in tow, she disappeared.

"… Maybe I should have fought the boy," Iroh said regretfully.

/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\

Lady Xian's "Palace" was a brothel.

Of COURSE it's a brothel! Zuko roared at himself. What other place in the middle ring would NEED a yojimbo!

As "Lady" Xian had said, Zuko's transit papers had arrived just before dinner time along with a coin purse which contained a few silver bu and a note, smelling of flowers, that suggested that if he didn't get something to eat he might not have the "energy" he needed for tomorrow.

Iroh swooned at the implication as Zuko scowled.

"I never said that I would-"

"You are in NO position to turn that lovely lady down!" Iroh said forcefully.

He had been right and so Zuko, papers in hand, had presented himself to the gate to the middle ring that next morning. They passed him through after giving his papers a quick scan and reminding him that the gates would be closed down after sundown.

To say that the middle ring was far nicer than the lower ring would easily qualify for the understatement of the century.

The streets were clean, paved and, by comparison to the lower ring at least, practically empty. For the first time in a very long time Zuko felt underdressed as most of the people that passed him by, walking in the unhurried manner of the confidently well-to-do, were wealthy merchants, minor government officials or aristocratic students at Ba Sing Se University. Everyone was dressed in silks and satins and looked infinitely better fed than the peasantry, in their rough woolens, in the ring below.

Finding the "Palace" wasn't a challenge as every watchman he asked smiled slyly and gave him remarkably detailed directions, seeming to assume that he was a future patron.

The building itself was a modest three-story affair, just across the street from a trendy tea café, which Zuko knew his uncle would have loved. In all appearances it seemed to be just like any other building in the middle-ring; clean white plaster walls, decorative topiary out front. The only clue to its actual function was the red lantern hanging above the door.

Zuko had been stunned when he had first learned of the practice, as the idea of exchanging money for sex struck him as being rather crass. Certainly, the Fire-Nation had geisha, but their task was to soothe the troubled spirit, and to that end they were masterful artists, poets, and musicians.

Of course, if sex was the best way to help they were also very skilled at that.

However, it was more common for a samurai to visit a geisha house simply to relax. To talk, vent their frustrations about their duties and responsibilities, have a few drinks and be entertained by the skilled men and women who had dedicated their lives to beauty and art. It was considered very dishonorable to be seen to be unhappy with one's duty in the Fire-Nation but, by custom, when in the privacy of the geisha house that proscription was lifted. A geisha would never be asked to testify in court, and any insult to their persons would be met with an overwhelming tide of violence from their other, more honorable patrons.

No one with any honor abused the geisha. They were practically sacrosanct, and it was one of the highest dishonors imaginable to strike down someone so defenseless. Like attacking a pregnant woman, a surrendering combatant, or a child. Even peasants, who had no martial training at all, were considered far more able to defend themselves than the geisha.

But the Earth-Kingdom, barbarians that they were, did not have geisha. In the lower ring women, and sometimes men, might simply stand on street corners calling out prices for themselves. Zuko had seen them haggling with potential clients, and once a loud shouting match as two women tried to outbid one another for the attentions of a particularly handsome man.

Barbarian or not, geisha or not, Lady Xian was a… forceful person. Shepractically dragged Zuko into the building as soon as he arrived, and before he knew what was happening, he was in his loincloth, still clutching his sword, being measured for new clothes by a veritable flock of women.

"It simply won't do darling," Xian said in the sultry purring manner she favored. "You simply must look the part."

"Part? What par-"

"Oh darling, people have expectations when they come here," she said, stepping all over him again. "You are the fierce but proud ronin. Deadly, but refined. Bitter at the mysterious circumstances that led you to this moment, but still… unbroken, unbowed, unyielding." She gestured dramatically as she spoke, looking out at a hypothetical audience.

She and my uncle would get along nicely, Zuko speculated. IF they didn't try to outdo each other every moment of every day.

"You will be my daylight showpiece, my front man, my sentinel, my-" she smirked at him- "Lion at the gate."

Zuko glared at her.

"YES!" she cried joyfully. "THAT look. That's the look you should have when you interact with patrons! Fury, held in check only by the tattered code of honor you cling to like a life raft."

I am not rolling my eye. I am not rolling my eye. I am NOT rolling my eye.

Zuko, having been successfully distracted by his new employer, was soon amazed to find himself completely dressed again. She had had her retinue put him in a dark green kimono with flaring sleeves; the green so dark it was practically black. In addition, he now had on a pair of grey hakama pants belted around his navel.

"You must keep the kimono open slightly darling," Xian said tapping his chest with her fan. "It's traditional, and you shouldn't deny the world such a lovely view of your chest and its accompanying… scars." She trembled ostentatiously before continuing. "After all we serve female patrons here as well."

"I AM NOT-"

"Oh of course not, darling. I'd never dream of asking it of you. But don't be surprised if someone offers." She smiled slyly, her fan at her lips. "And try not to be surprised at how high the offers might go."

I am not rolling my eye AND I am not blushing. I am not rolling my eye AND I am NOT blushing.

He was only partially successful

/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\

Zuko's new job (which he had apparently accepted. Having not been able to talk long enough to decline without being interrupted) turned out to be quite simple. Instead of walking the streets, tailing along behind someone, looking menacing, he simply stood outside the door of the Palace doing exactly the same thing. Xian coached him on his posture, "slouching, but deadly, a predator at his ease," and as sundown approached two enormous brothers, Ya and Chou'lou, lumbered out of the shadows and took his place. Zuko, moving quickly, headed home before the gates locked down.

Thus, was a routine set.

Zuko rose with the sun, performed the thousand cuts on the roof of his apartment building, bathed, and the went to work. Most days nothing happened. Only occasionally would a patron become too rowdy, drunk, or disrespectful and Zuko would have to eject them. He particularly savored the instance when he got to knock a rather drunk Earth samurai unconscious with a single blow to the back of the neck. These minor incidents, and the vast pervasive calm between them, reminded Zuko rather forcibly of his time on his ship, drifting from port to port, before the Avatar made his fateful appearance at the south pole.

When he mentioned this to his uncle, Iroh said that now, surrounded by earth as he was, was as good a time as any to practice his mindfulness and patience. His zanshin; the "remaining mind." To practice the art of zanshin meant to practice total awareness, not focusing on any one thing but on all things. To sit, as a stone, and watch the world in stillness. Breathing in the world, breathing out the self, allowing the two to merge and mingle, only reacting in the proper moment, and with the greatest effect. It was one of the fundamental keys to iaijutsu Iroh told him, and once he mastered it he might be able to move towards the mushin, the "no mind."

So, as he stood by the door to a whorehouse, Zuko practiced. He was soon sure that, no matter what his uncle thought, he would never have mushin. Anger was his constant companion. It would build, like water dripping from a leaky roof, poisoning his mind and ruining the stillness of his zanshin. But, unlike before, whenever it became too much he would reach into his coin purse and pull out his blue stone. He would let it rest in the palm of his hand, gently stroking it with his thumb, and all the rage would fall away. Even the angry guilty voice in his head that spat and cursed and called him weak for his lack of self-reliance would eventually vanish like a puff of smoke.

Zuko breathed in, breathed out, put the stone away, and began his zanshin again.

The conversations of clients and the patrons of the shops along the street became simply… sound.

The patrolling watchmen in green, the white plaster walls, and colorful passersby became just… sight.

The warmth of the sun, the weight of his sword, the feel of his back on the wall and his straw hat on his head became simply… feeling.

Over a month passed before Zuko felt like he was really getting the hang of it.

In those meditative weeks, the only thing of true excitement that happened to Zuko was on an instance where he reached for his blue stone… and didn't immediately find it. He hadn't lost it, it had actually managed to get buried in his coin purse, wrapped in the coupons for free tea that his uncle kept pressing on him, but the idea that he might have bothered him an inordinate amount. On the way home that day he bought a length of red woven silk and attached it to the stone with the little copper ring it had come with.

It took him almost a week to realize how much it reminded him of another necklace he had once had in his possession. He chuckled, remembering the many times he had pulled that one out, contemplating the patterns in the stone, considering exactly what that Shinjo girl was teaching the Avatar. Amused, he placed the necklace back in his pouch, securing it with the red band.

It took another day for him to remember what Lt Bo had said about that necklace.

"That's a Water-Tribe betrothal necklace. Putting something like around a girl's neck is tantamount to proposing," she had said.

Zuko, the realization coming upon him like a thunderbolt as he slouched against the wall of Lady Xian's Palace, panicked.

A betrothal necklace?! How in the Sun's holy name did I accidentally make a BETROTHAL Necklace?!

Body still but eye darting furiously under his straw hat he continued to panic.

She doesn't know! It doesn't COUNT if she doesn't know! We are NOT engaged! Sure, I said the words, but that was a complete mistake. An Accident! Just because she said it back doesn't mean… An accident AND a misunderstanding! Besides, nobody knows about it but US. It's not like she's going to tell anybody about it.

He began to calm down until, unbidden, a passage from LEADERSHIP floated into his mind.

"When a Samurai has said he will perform an action, it is as good as done. Nothing will stop him from completing what he has said he will do. He does not have to 'give his word.' He does not have to 'promise.' The action of SPEAKING alone has set the act of doing in motion. Speaking and doing are the same action."

He resumed panicking.

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, SHIT!

After a few moments of silent cursing, it occurred to him that none of it really mattered.

I'm probably never going to see her again.

The idea soothed his panic but also made his stomach seem to drop into his sandals with heart-rending force.

It's… probably for the best, he told himself. We're very different people with VERY different outlooks on life. It would never work out. She wants to sink my homeland beneath the ocean, and I…

What did he want? His uncle had asked him that very question only a few days previously.

He hadn't had a response then and, point of fact, he didn't have one now. He had spent his whole life trying to execute his duty, fulfill his destiny, that he had never really considered what he wanted.

I want… to figure out… what I want.

Did that count?

I've got nothing but time. I can figure this out.

"Oy, Ping," Chou'lou said tapping him on the shoulder heavily. "Your shift's over, better get before you're trapped up here."

Zuko had apparently been so deep in the depths of panic that he had managed to miss his two enormous coworkers' approach as the shadows along the street grew longer.

"You could stay, darling," Lady Xian purred from one of the open windows above him. "The Palace is always open to you, and I'm sure the girls would love to have you." Zuko flushed as a riot of giggles and outright laughter sprang from the building behind him.

Doing his best to maintain his dignity, Zuko bowed, bid them all good evening, and moved, a bit more quickly than necessary, towards home.

/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\

Late Spring, year 11 in the reign of Fire-Lord Ozai

It was an ordinary day.

There were no clouds. Ba Sing Se had very moderate weather.

Zuko's zanshin practice was going smoothly. He hadn't needed to look at his stone at all today.

Breathe in. There were people in the street, birds chirping in a nearby bush, sun on his conical straw hat.

Breathe out. Eye focused in the middle distance, ears hearing everything.

Breathe in. Two people approaching, light conversation, his back still on the wall.

Breathe out. Step to the right, blocking their entrance.

Wait… why did I…

"Excuse me! We'd like to go in please," a bossy voice demanded.

It was HER and his zanshin collapsed like a sandcastle at high tide.

This… this CANNOT be happening! Zuko thought his panic resuming with a ferocity. I am NOT going to have to explain why I'm guarding a brothel. NOT after we haven't seen each other in three months! Ancestors preserve me!

"Yeah! Move aside, shit-brick!" The smaller of the pair shouted.

And the Bandit is here too, isn't THAT fantastic, Zuko thought sarcastically. Best to get it over with I guess.

"I don't think either of you want anything in there," he rumbled, tilting back the conical straw which had been obscuring his features.

Katara, who had been about to launch into one of her now familiar verbal tirades, froze in place, her mouth open comically. Toph cocked her head to the side, her sightless eyes fixed on a point to Zuko's right.

"Have we met? You sound… awfully familiar," she said.

"I'm… a fan," Zuko said with a sigh.

Toph gasped in delight. "Mr. TREE?! Holy shit! Katara! This is the guy I was telling you about! The one who helped me find you guys!" she paused, tilting her head down and to the side for a moment, then broke into a huge, slightly malicious grin. "And I was right! From the way your heart is going pitter-pat, he must be cute."

"Shut UP, Toph," Katara said, going crimson

Ok. Good. They're distracted. Now I just need to-

"You ruined my joke though, Mr. Tree," Toph said, her brow furrowing in irritation. "I wanted to hear all the funny embarrassed squeaking noises she was going to make when she found out this place is a brothel."

Katara's eyes narrowed. "A BROTHEL?" she snarled.

Damnit.

"I… work here," Zuko said, trying for calm detachment.

"You work… in a BROTHEL?" Katara growled through gritted teeth, nearing the edge of an explosion.

"Not IN! FOR! FOR a brothel! In front of!" Calm detachment vanished. Not really his strong suit anyway.

"A likely story!" Katara snapped, hands on her hips and glaring.

Zuko was about to fire back when Toph interrupted.

"Do you guys know each other?"

Oh shit.

Katara froze again, eyes going wide and meeting Zuko's

"Uhhh… No?" Zuko said lamely.

"Did you know that I can tell when people are lying?" Toph said slyly. "I can hear their heart rates through my feet."

Well, THAT'S inconvenient.

"Uhhh… well… That is to say that-"

"Alright Toph! Fine!" Katara said, stamping her foot and interrupting Zuko's fumbling. "We… we met up at the Earth Rumble. It was kind of… kind of a date. You can't tell Sokka. OR Aang!"

Now it was Zuko's turn to stand there, jaw stretching towards the ground.

"Oooooh, is he your boyfriend?" Toph crooned.

"NO! I mean, I haven't seen him since… seen him in a long time."

The three of them sat in silence for a long moment.

"Ok, now this is getting awkward… and boring," Toph said with a snort. "Let's go sugar-queen! You can come back and canoodle on your own time, this is supposed to be a girl's day." She began to walk away down the street.

"Girl's day?" Zuko mouthed in confusion.

Katara was not to be distracted however. Her eyes were narrowed and her mouth was set in a thin line as she silently shook her finger in Zuko's face.

"You. Here. TONIGHT," she commanded, gesturing forcefully with her index finger, silently mouthing the words.

Zuko opened his mouth in protest, to try and explain that he couldn't meet her here tonight, the gates would be locked down… but Katara was having none of it. Her eyes promised wrath and ruination should he fail to comply.

There's my snuggle-bunny, Zuko thought. He sighed and nodded in assent.

Katara nodded, as though her victory had been inevitable, then swung around and trotted off to catch up with the tiny earthbender. Zuko did his best to not look like a complete fool as his eye followed her until she disappeared.

"So that's her, hmmmm?" Lady Xian purred from behind him.

Oh yes, I'm GREAT at zanshin, Zuko thought sarcastically as he nearly jumped out of his skin. Really GREAT at situational awareness! That's ME!

"Her?" he managed to reply after he recovered.

"The girl darling? The one you're in love with?"

"I'm… not-"

"Oh darling, don't be silly. I knew the moment I saw you. You have that 'woman-done-me-wrong' look. It's part of your charm."

"She did NOT do me wrong," Zuko snarled, far angrier at the slight to Katara than he was to the slight to his own dignity.

Xian's eyebrows shot up in surprise and mild amusement.

"Oooh, you have it bad," she said, shaking her head sadly. "Poor dear."

/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\^/\

Zuko now found himself caught between the volcano and the cliffside.

If he didn't go home before sundown he would be trapped in the middle ring all night. Most likely he would have to accept Lady Xian's hospitality and spend the night in the brothel. No matter that nothing would happen, somehow Katara would find out about it. She would kill him.

His other option was to simply go home and pray to whatever spirits were listening the Katara would be understanding about him not being there when she appeared. The spirits would most likely ignore him as usual and Katara would be furious. She would KILL him.

With his two options being death, and more death, Zuko decided that, on the whole, he'd rather see her first, then later she could kill him.

So, he waited in an alleyway as the sun dipped below the skyline… and resumed panicking about the fact that they were, no matter how incidentally, inadvertently or misunderstadingly, engaged.

Should I tell her? I should tell her. What if she finds out BEFORE I tell her? She will be PISSED! And not in the sexy way either. She will be pissed in the "I'm seriously going to lock your head in a ball of ice and leave you floating in the ocean" way!

He strode back and forth a worried scowl on his face as he idly fingered his grey-blue stone.

This is so stupid! It was an accident. What sort of moron decided the phrase "nobody kills you but me" was the same as a marriage proposal? What sort of moron actually SAYS something like that in the heat of the moment? MORON!

His pacing grew frantic.

What if she already knows? Maybe THAT'S why she was so angry? Ancestors preserve me, she's going to flay me alive!

He stopped pacing abruptly.

what if she doesn't?

He blinked.

What if she knows… and she's… HAPPY about it?

His pulse, which had already been going a mile a minute, redoubled its efforts.

That. Would. Be. WORSE!

He resumed his panicked pacing.

Zuko's brain, which before this point had simply been deadlocked in his regular pattern of prospective damage control, now found itself engaged in a full-scale civil war. His rational side, manning the garrison, insisted that there was no way it would work out, no way she could actually care for him, and certainly no way he would ever be accepted by Katara's family; something that he knew from his studies was especially important to Unicorn tribespeople.

The rebel faction, once a small rag-tag collection of half-formed dreams and ridiculous sentiment, was now a full division attempting to storm the battlements of his mind, waving blue and red patterned flags, and chanting "nobody kills you but ME!" as a battle cry.

She doesn't like me THAT much!

She had come to him though, risking discovery and dishonor with every step.

She was just… spying!

The last time he had suggested that she had been absolutely furious. And again, not the sexy kind of furious.

…ok, maybe the slightly less sexy kind of furious.

I don't know if I'm really in love with her! I'm eighteen! What in the ashpits do I know about love!?

Yet he had managed to accidentally make her a betrothal necklace. It now seemed to weigh a thousand pounds, as he put it back in his coin purse.

Father would never…

Fire-Lord Ozai had no say in the matter. Legally speaking, Zuko wasn't his son anymore.

HER father would never…

This was the woman that had told the northern half of her people to go sit on an icicle and spin because she didn't have time for their stupid rules about gender roles.

She wants to kill my family!

Fire-Lord Ozai-

She wants to kill my SISTER!

…Katara said she didn't want to kill anyone.

But there is no way, in the Sun's holy name, that she can get what she wants without doing it. Azula is a good samurai; she WON'T stop.

Azula wouldn't stop.

They will FIGHT!

They would fight.

I'd… I'd have to pick a SIDE!

He would have to pick a side.

FUCK!

Fuck indeed.

"Zuko!" a voice whispered in front of him, snapping him out of his mental fugue. Despite the fading light, he could see that Katara still looked rather annoyed.

Annoyed… and beautiful.

The battle stopped. The siege was still in place, but the fight was put on hold. A temporary armistice as the disparate parts of Zuko's brain turned to watch whatever happened next.

"Hey," Zuko said quietly.

Katara's face softened minutely. "Hey."

"…I missed you," Zuko said, still silently cursing himself for a fool.

She exhaled softly, shaking her head. "I missed you too," she said quietly.

The rebel forces cheered.

"Come on," she said, grabbing his hand. "We'll go get some dinner. We need to talk."


A/N: Another Sunday, another chapter! Good morning world! (it's morning here in the GMT -5) Hope you enjoyed part one of "the tales of Ba Sing Se," our dramatic duo is back together and about the make with dramatics, theatrics, and bombastics!

Always remember, as a fish needs water and a plant needs sun, an author needs comments. Ok, not needs but I do love them, welcome them and, if there's a question I can answer without spoilering the plot, I answer. You guys are the best.

This is META-BITS! (/done in the old CNN style)

Lady Xian: honestly one of my favorite OC characters to date. Zuko's boss, the classy madame. She rolls in, uses a combination of charisma and wiles to get her way, and rolls back out. If that seems familiar it's because it is. She's got a significant relationship with one or two of the OTHER characters. 39.3 bonus points to whoever figures it out. Also as astute readers will have noticed she shows up at Zuko and Iroh's place before sunrise. This is a hint to exactly how connected this lady is. Ah, so much fun to write.

Yojimbo: A Yojimbo, as stated, is a classical bodyguard in a feudal Japan and later. It also the name of a film by Akira Kurosawa (of seven samurai fame) and starring Toshiro Mifune. If you like samurai films, or westerns, and haven't seen it do yourself a favor and bring it to your eye holes.

You may be wondering why I mentioned westerns back there. If not skip ahead, the rest of you sit right down and let me lay some knowledge on you.

Westerns ARE Samurai films.

A lone gunman, with a mysterious past, rolls into town challenges the status quo and sets things aright before disappearing again. Here in America, that's a huge part of our mythos, the wandering gunslinger. Well friends, prepare your brains because Cowboys are basically American Samurai, in terms of moves anyway. "The Magnificent Seven" is "The Seven Samurai." "Fistful of Dollars" is Yojimbo." "Blindman is Zatoichi." Both genres, feed off one another and sort of blended together with truly awesome effects. I love 'em. And I love 'em so much I'll probably go back to playing Red Dead 2 after this goes live on your internets. I regret nothing.

Geisha: So, really, what are geisha? In RW feudal Japan they were just entertainers. Often times a certain variety of prostitute would also dress and entertain like geisha which, retroactively causes some confusion for those of us a continent and several centuries away. It is also important to note that in RW Japan they were not considered to be people. They were "Hinin" or non-people, who's professions caused them to break the taboos of Buddhism. But, for the purposes of this piece think of them as described. Entertainers, poets, performers, and masseuses, who also will have sex with you, should they want to. That I think is the important takeaway, Geisha are controlling their own destiny here in MY world. Because I'm not trying to do a lot of social commentary here, just have a good time.

Zanshin: Zanshin is a HUGE part of martial arts, with all sorts of different connotations, and meanings depending on the art in question and your instructors personal perspective. Again, described in the text as well, I just thought I'd mention that it IS a real thing, and is an important one, even in a non-martial arts setting. Situational awareness, of yourself, your body and where it is in relation to other things is one of those large pet peeves of mine. I account a lack of Zanshin as the fundamental reason for poor driving, long lines at the DMV and people who talk at the theater.

Reunion: Ah, young love. Our kids are back in proximity again, I know you were all looking forward to that. They should be interreacting with one another in their usual combative/adorable way from now… until the very end. (/sound of ominous bassoon of foreshadowing)

Look forward to it, and thanks again for reading, commenting, kudosing and liking!

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NEXT WEEK on a very special "Avatar: The Last Dragon"...

Iroh drinks tea! There are misunderstandings, drama, and noodles. Then Zuko takes a much-needed nap.

TUNE IN. Same Zuko time, Same Zuko channel!

Original post date: 28 October 2018