A/N: For this chapter, please listen to 'The Crooked Kind' by Radical Face to get you in the right feels!
2. Forgive me, I'm so very, very sorry
Clementine runs and runs as fast as her shaking legs can carry her, and she struggles to decipher her surroundings through the darkness while advancing deeper into the woods.
"Sarah!" she shouts with desperation, but the girl's silhouette only continues to sprint further away from her in the distance. "Sarah, wait!" she continues to call out while stumbling on her own feet, but she isn't even sure if the girl can hear her. "Stop!"
Clementine doesn't know how long it is when her cowering figure finally slows, and she lessens her own pace as she gets nearer.
Coming to a halt, Clementine's hands brace herself on her knees while she gasps for air, and all that can be heard for a while is the sound of distant gunfire somewhere behind them.
"You- you can't run off on your own like that," she pants, "We have to stick together."
Sarah doesn't directly face her, and her eyes frantically scan the dark forest around her instead. Her chest begins to rise and fall rapidly, and she can't even hear Clementine over the sound of her own panicked breaths.
"Oh, no…" breaths Sarah, worriedly snapping her head in all directions before tightly covering her hands over her ears and squeezing her eyes shut. "No, no, no… Daddy…" Sarah's voice wavers before beginning to repeatedly mutter words that only herself can understand.
Clementine uneasily glances around them, before eyeing the girl's backside with concern brimming in her eyes. "Are you okay?" Her hand subconsciously reaches outwards, but her fingertips don't quite reach her for fear of startling the distressed girl, and instead only hovers a distance away.
I don't… I don't know where I am," Sarah whimpers through trembling breaths, before aimlessly pacing around as if in search of something. "We're lost. I- I have to get back to him!" her voice rises to a shout, before dissolving into something barely audible. "Please… he protects me."
"Sarah, just calm down," comforts Clementine with a delicate tone as she watches the frightened girl stride in circles around them. "It's gonna be okay."
Finally, Sarah stops a few feet away, and her back remains turned to her. Attempting to compose herself, she focuses on levelling her heartrate, taking steady breaths one after the other.
Clementine awkwardly shifts her stance after a moment, rubbing her arm. "I'm sorry… about your dad." It's all she can manage to say, and the horrible image is still fresh in her mind. She can only imagine how Sarah must be feeling after seeing something like that happen right in front of her.
The girl still doesn't seem to be listening. She's only standing motionless with her arms wrapped tightly around herself now, and her head hangs low to the ground.
"But… we can't stay here," Clementine continues, glancing around nervously. "We have to keep moving."
She doesn't reply, and Clementine finds herself uncomfortable at Sarah's sudden change of emotions.
"Sarah… I need you to listen to me right now," she steps closer, but the girl remains unmoving. "We have to find the others. They said they would meet us, remember?" There's no response, but Clementine is only worrying about how far they've gone since she started chasing her just a few minutes earlier. "You know where it is, right? You've been there before?"
"I don't- I don't remember," Sarah begins to sob while burying her face in her hands, and Clementine instantly regrets asking so many questions at once.
"Okay, that's okay," she attempts to sound uplifting, raising the pitch of her voice in the softest tone possible. "We can find it together… okay?" Clementine approaches her from behind, and she hopes her words are at least enough to get the girl to turn around.
It turns quiet between them again, and Clementine's shoulders fall with a sigh.
She can't expect Sarah to want to talk to her right now, especially after what just happened. Even she recalls countless days of her own where she just wanted to lock herself away from the world and never come out, but now isn't the best time to completely shut down, especially now that they've been separated from everyone else.
"I know what you're going through. But right now, I need you to focus," pleads Clementine. "The others can't be too far. We just have to go…" Her sentence dies on her lips when she turns to observe their surroundings, and it isn't until then that she, too, realizes she doesn't have a clue of where they are.
It's nearly pitch dark around them, and Clementine can hardly see a few feet in front of her from the shadows of the countless groaning trees than tower over them. She's not even sure which direction they came from. It all just looks exactly the same, and suddenly the chilling night breeze feels so much colder on her skin.
The snarling horde of walkers can't be heard anymore, and she realizes the repeated gunfire has finally stopped, too. It only makes her wonder how long the two of them have actually been out here, and how far away Sarah had managed to run.
The unusual silence is haunting, and Clementine only hopes there aren't any more walkers lingering nearby.
She forces herself to remain composed in front of Sarah, despite the slight panic she feels inside. Sarah is the only one between the two of them that has any idea of where they need to go, and they may never see their group again if she doesn't co-operate.
When Clementine turns to face her once more, she finds Sarah now sitting on the ground of the forest with her legs crossed underneath her, and she's expectantly staring forward into nothing.
"What are you doing?" asks Clementine while looking down at her, confused as to how she is suddenly so calm.
She doesn't speak for a while, and Clementine can't see her face, but her soft and emotionless voice finally sounds again. "Waiting," she says simply.
"For what?"
"For my dad," responds Sarah quietly, as if the answer is obvious, and Clementine only stares back with a stunned expression when realization suddenly hits her.
"Your… your dad's not coming." It takes all the strength in her to muster those unfortunately true words, but she can't lie to her. It wouldn't be right.
"He- he said that if I ever get lost… that I should just stay put because… he'll find me," Sarah explains slowly, and her weak voice cracks further with every word. "He'll always find me."
Clementine feels a part of herself shatter at the hopeless sight, and she bends down towards Sarah's hunched form. "Please, Sarah," she tugs on the girl's arm, but she refuses to stand. "Just… please get up."
"No!" Sarah snaps in anger while jerking her hands away. "We just have to wait! Just a little bit longer... He'll be here."
Clementine steps back, and a tired sigh escapes her lungs. "No… he won't." She hates to tell her this, but she can't just let the girl remain in a state of denial. She deserves to know the truth, even if it breaks her. "I'm sorry."
"Stop telling me that!" shouts Sarah, and Clementine flinches from her sudden outburst. "You don't know that!" As she speaks, she rises to a stand and faces her, and it's the first time they've made eye contact since she was first followed into the woods.
"Yes, I do," Clementine responds firmly, and she finds her own voice rising in volume.
"No, you don't! You think you know everything but you don't!"
"That's not true!" Clementine yells back defensively, irritation rising inside from the awful accusation.
"You don't understand! He means everything to me!" Sarah continues to argue, and her voice breaks all over again. "You're just a little kid! You don't- you don't know what it's like!"
"Stop it!"
"You don't even have a dad!" Sarah yells over her as if she isn't even listening, and all of Clementine's argument quickly dies on her tongue.
Clementine's eyes widen in shock, and she's stunned by the harsh words. Neither of them say anything anymore, and she only stares back at Sarah with tears brimming in her big eyes.
She huffs, pouting in an attempt to stop herself from crying right then. "That's not fair!" Clementine shouts with her fists clenched by her sides, and her trembling voice cracks louder than she expected.
That hurts her, more than anything. It had been the last thing she expected to hear, especially from Sarah. It hurts even more knowing that it came from her. But as they stare into each other's eyes with hurt expressions aimed at the other, Clementine realizes that a part of herself understands how Sarah feels.
She's right. Clementine has no one. She doesn't have any family left, not anymore. And she has no right to talk about the girl's dad like that when she doesn't even have one of her own.
And Sarah – she had Carlos for so long, and they meant the world to each other. It's rare to have something like that these days, even if it doesn't end up lasting. Then he was just brutally taken from her in an instant. It had happened so fast.
Sarah hardly reacts, but insecurity rushes over Clementine as the unfortunately true words continue to echo in her mind, and she suddenly feels so ashamed.
Sarah only turns her back to her once more, as if she hadn't just said what she did. "Please, just leave me alone!" she pleads, walking a few steps away. "He's- he's gonna find me, and… and then it'll all be okay. You'll see." The confidence in her voice slowly descends as she speaks, and a part of Sarah knows that she's only lying to herself now.
It can't be true. It just can't be.
"You'll see," Sarah repeats, barely audible this time. At this point, she's not even sure whether she's trying to convince Clementine anymore. Maybe she's only trying to convince herself, and the shame washes heavier over her.
It's hauntingly silent between them, and as Clementine stares longingly at the other girl's backside with tears fresh in her own eyes, she just knows.
She had been breaking so slowly, and the longer it went on, the more it hurt her. Until finally, everything just shattered in an instant, and now there's nothing left for her to hold on to.
And helplessly, Clementine had watched it all happen, inevitably unravelling right in front of her.
"Sarah…" she croaks, her voice just above a whisper. "I'm so sorry," and that's all it takes for Sarah to start sobbing right then and there.
Her shoulders shake as she weeps, and Clementine feels her own heart crumbling just from the sight of her. She suddenly feels so much farther away from her friend, and all that can be heard for a while is Sarah's heart-aching cries.
She doesn't know what to do. What can she say to someone who had just lost everything that mattered to her?
Clementine tightly presses her lips together, fighting with herself, and she's at a loss for words. But, she's been there before. Sarah was wrong, she does know what it's like. She knows it all too well.
So, Clementine does the only thing she has the strength for, and she finds herself lunging forward in an instant, tightly wrapping her arms around Sarah's midsection from behind.
Sarah jerks forward from the sudden gesture, and she lets out another loud sob with her eyes squeezed shut.
For a moment, it's as if she's trying to break free from the smaller girl's hold, but Clementine refuses to let go, only continuing to embrace her with her cheek pressed firmly against the girl's back. Until finally, Sarah completely gives in, and she melts into her in defeat, latching onto Clementine's arms with desperation.
"He's… he's just… gone," Sarah chokes out through hitched breaths, and she's not even sure whether it's a question or not.
Clementine burrows her face deeper into Sarah's backside, just to remind her that she's there, and her tear-filled eyes are squeezed shut, too.
Neither of them say anything after that, and they stay there for a while as Sarah pours out what's left of her broken heart.
It's cold and dark around them. But even without a clue of where they are, they stay there, with Clementine tightly hugging her from behind with everything she has, and truly wishing she could take the pain away.
