This chapter just sort of sprung forth from boredom and a very long bus ride.
I'm glad you all thought that some fitted well. I'll keep you updated if there's ever a significant song for a chapter because I'm a bit obsessed with music.
Chapter Twenty Two
"What do you want to talk about today?" Katie inquired serenely.
She unscrewed her bottle of ice tea and took a small sip.
Dynasty, no longer daunted by the Dictaphone between them, leant back comfortably in her armchair.
"I don't know. I mean, what haven't we talked about?" Dynasty jested in return, flipping her loose ringlets away from her face.
Katie beamed, signaling to Dynasty that she was pleased by her progress.
"Well, we haven't actually talked about what happened. Steve-O didn't just assault you sexually, Dynasty. Why don't you tell me how you feel about the shooting?" Katie encouraged.
Dynasty considered Katie's suggestion carefully, her fingers idly glancing over the clean dressing that protected the jagged holes in her flesh.
"I was scared. I've never been that scared." Dynasty bit her lip before continuing and ignored the startling terror that stirred in her chest. "I can't really explain it, but I was scared that there would be something, you know, after. I thought, if he was going to kill me then I just wanted... I just wanted to go. People talk about heaven and all that but being without my family, or Kevin and my friends; I didn't want that. Look, I know it's selfish but I couldn't stand hanging around somewhere, watching them get on with their lives without me."
Dynasty bowed her head. She steadied herself with deep, soothing breaths as Katie had taught her.
"I don't believe that's selfish, Dynasty, given the circumstances. You would want them to be happy," Katie surmised, "but I can understand that you may not necessarily want to watch it happen whilst you're not there to share it with them."
Dynasty nodded slowly and smiled weakly.
"I didn't really care about the pain or any of that. I was just terrified of never seeing them again. And Kevin, well he was right there, wasn't he? I didn't want him to see that," Dynasty choked, her voice thick as her throat constricted to pull back the sobs building in her chest.
Katie's golden ponytail bobbed as she leant towards Dynasty, squeezing a tissue into her hand.
Dynasty accepted it gratefully but did not allow her tears to fall regardless. Sniffing stubbornly, Dynasty abandoned the crumpled tissue on the coffee table and shuffled herself back into her seat.
Katie smiled hesitantly and Dynasty nodded for the session to continue.
"Thinking about when you woke up in the hospital; how did you feel then?"
Connor stretched his legs out in front of him as Imogen curled up beside him, leaning back again the headboard of Kevin's bed.
Kevin closed the door quietly behind them and sank tiredly onto the end of his bed, crossing his legs beneath him.
"So, how is she?" Imogen asked briskly.
Connor nudged her sharply as Kevin twisted his fingers together.
Kevin, however, smiled and seemed to relax as the conversation turned to Dynasty.
"You saw her last weekend. She hasn't changed much since then," Kevin laughed.
"Stop it! You know what I mean," Imogen exclaimed and rolled her eyes.
Kevin untangled his hands and leant back on his arms, slightly more at ease now that they were speaking openly.
"She's getting better. She's frustrated. She still can't bend or stretch and she gets tired in about two minutes if she pushes herself too far.
"She- she's got into her head that I'm not going to want her anymore when she's healed."
Connor's brow furrowed.
"That's mental," he commented, draping his arm across Imogen's shoulder.
Imogen however was not as startled as Connor and sighed heavily.
"She thinks the scars will be ugly, doesn't she?" Imogen inferred, her saddened eyes flitting from Kevin to her right, where her scarred skin spread down her neck.
Kevin nodded, desperate to alleviate the tension that settled between the three of them.
"The bullet wasn't even whole by the time it... you know, which in the long run meant it didn't go deep enough to hit anything major but... Dynasty won't let me see it. Her surgeon said he did his best but it's not going to be a clean scar." As though to himself, Kevin shook his head. "I know she's changed, and she's not, I don't know, as vain as she used to be, but she's still Dynasty. She's so confused about everything else that how she looks was the only think she really counted on."
Kevin huffed and let his head fall into his hands.
"But it doesn't change anything. She's still beautiful; it's a bit intimidating really," Imogen murmured.
Connor tugged her closer and kissed her hair.
"I'm still trying to figure out how you did it, mate. I mean, don't get me wrong, you're great together but-"
"But she's so far out of my league I'm hoping she never realizes," Kevin finished, sure it was not what Connor had intended to say, but nonetheless sincere.
Imogen laughed and shook her head, mumbling, "That's not true," under her breath.
Dynasty bit the inside of her cheek thoughtfully as Katie thanked her for her honesty, as she did at the end of each session.
"Are you sure there's nothing else you want to talk to me about?" Katie asked, holding up the Dictaphone pointedly before stowing it in her purse. "Off the record."
Dynasty licked her lips shyly.
After several moments of silence and locked stares, Dynasty revealed the memory that was sitting at the back of her mind in a rush.
"I kissed Kevin again," Dynasty blurted.
Katie's eyebrows rose in surprise and she fell back into her seat again.
"You kissed him 'again?' Dynasty, I was under the impression that you and Kevin were still involved romantically," Katie said.
Dynasty desperately wanted to stand up, to pace, to move, but she knew she would need Katie's support and that she would not allow.
"We are. I mean, like, really kissed him," Dynasty clarified.
"Okay," Katie ventured slowly, "and how do you feel about that?"
Dynasty smirked and shared a look of understanding with Katie.
"Good, but you don't think it's too soon, do you?" Dynasty pressed, running her sweating palms across her jeans.
Katie pushed herself out of her seat and sat down on the arm of Dynasty's chair.
"Did it feel like too soon?" she inquired, placing a comforting hand over Dynasty's.
"No," Dynasty affirmed resolutely as she heaved herself from the armchair.
Katie stood also.
"Then why did you stop, Dynasty?"
Katie's question startled her, but Dynasty reminded herself that Katie was only trying to help, not pry.
"Well, Mrs Budgen sort of interrupted us," Dynasty muttered, her eyes downcast.
Katie studied her for a moment.
"And would you have stopped, if you hadn't been interrupted? Katie said softly.
Dynasty thought hurriedly for an answer to this before she decided upon the truth.
"I don't know."
