Lie To Me
Special thanks to everyone who reviewed every chapter of this story and stuck with my little it since the beginning. It's been a wild ride and at times I'm sure you guys thought I would never finish this series…and there are a few of you that wish it wouldn't end ^^ I appreciate you guys the most! And who knows, there might be another story in this series, I'm leaving it open to that in case I get a bit of inspiration.
This was my first series ever and it all started with a one shot. It is probably the longest thing I've ever written, so thanks for reading!
Special thanks to those who reviewed the last chapter: kimbee (Hopefully the inspiration will keep flowing for Avengers fics. I do have plans for a few in the future, but my mind is kind of fickle ^^), thewriterstory (Exactly ^^ Well, that and he almost had his mind taken away from him. And honestly I think for Tony that would be a fate worst than death), Qweb (lol, I know, that was mean. But I had to end the chapter somewhere and this way I got more reviews than normal ^^), ZhaLenn (Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to the other chapters as well as the last one! You are an epic person! Thanks for reading!), Sandy-wmd (I'll consider another addition to this story, but at the moment my mind is drawing a blank. Any ideas you have would be very welcomed, although I can't make any guarantees ^^), discordchick (Um, I apologize ahead of time…but thank you so much for reading! I love all your reviews!), ELOSHAZZY (I have a huge soft spot for their friendship as well. You can expect to see more Tony/Clint stories in the future…just maybe not within this universe ^^), Jaguarspot (I appreciate every review you leave ^^ You rock ^^), Lil'fuj13 (Nah, I love Clint too much to kill him off ^^ No worries ^^), Hawaiichick (I update once a week in stories that are WIP, I updated twice last weekend because the week before was hell and I missed an update.), jpgFury (I like cliffhangers. I regret nothing.)
Chapter Eleven
Tony's hands were still covered in blood. Dried, crusted brownish blood. He hadn't taken the time to wash them, not until he saw Clint's status himself.
"He's going to be okay, Tony." Bruce offered as he sat down next to his friend. "The medical team arrived in time. You gave them enough information that they knew to bring the blood. He's going to make a full recovery."
It had been close. Way too close for comfort. Tony still needed to see Clint with his own eyes before he could relax. He needed the proof that Clint was still alive.
"He saved me, Bruce." Tony spoke for the first time in a few hours. "He nearly died just to save me. Not even from death – Randle wasn't going to kill me. He was just going to take away everything that I am."
Bruce opened his mouth to respond, but seemed to change his mind and closed his mouth. Simply he ended up nodding in agreement.
Steve joined them quietly. "You would have done the same for him."
"I tried to escape." Tony nodded. "I just, couldn't. And he finally did, then – " Tony shook his head and tried to regain his composure.
The mask had fallen off ever since he saw Clint get stabbed by the scalpel. Tony was struggling to build it back brick by brick, but he was getting there. It was all a lot to take in. Tony felt strongly that he was the cause of all of this. Randle getting his claws into Clint in the first place was Tony's fault. If Tony hadn't over reacted. If Tony had listened and not kicked Clint to the curb for Pepper's choices, maybe none of this would have happened.
"What happened cannot be changed." Natasha commented from the other side of the room. "Don't punish yourself any further then you already have. Clint wouldn't want that."
Tony nodded, but didn't exactly agree. "Is Randle talking?"
"No." Natasha sighed. "But he will. We have the machine and his research. We should be able to put all the pieces together."
Something clicked in Tony's head. "Wait, that means we can figure out how to reverse whatever they did to Clint."
Natasha nodded slowly. "In theory." She didn't sound like she believed her own words.
Steve's eyes narrowed. "You don't think SHIELD will allow it?" He asked sharply.
She shrugged. "I don't know. It's a dangerous thought."
"It's Clint's choice." Tony snarled. "SHIELD can go screw themselves."
Natasha stared back at him, but didn't respond in a verbal or non-verbal way. It frustrated Tony. Clint's choice couldn't be taken away from him. Not like this. Fury wouldn't allow it. Tony wouldn't let him allow it.
"Clint gets to decide." Tony promised in a tone that left no room for argument.
Clint woke at his own pace. At first his eyes snapped open, but as soon as he saw that he was in one of SHIELD's medical rooms he relaxed, eyes closed like he'd never regained consciousness. It was a trick he'd learned over the years, it saved him from answering questions before he was ready.
And if anyone was asking, he wasn't ready.
His memory was back, the wall had been broken back in that room with Tony. All the information had flowed out and sometime while Clint had been unconscious his mind had filed everything back where it was supposed to go.
It was good, but it also was bad. Clint was embarrassed by the actions of his secondary self. How he had been timid and indecisive at every little thing. The memories disgusted him.
Clint also felt guiltily for how he had treated people he cared about with such distrust. Everything that had happened was so against his nature, well, for the most part. Everything he'd done had been wrong.
"You can stop fake-napping whenever you feel like talking." Natasha commented from the chair beside him. Clint hadn't heard her come in, but he never did when he was distracted. Besides, she was just that good.
One eye peeled opened to look at her. "Can I disappear?" He asked lightly.
"No." Natasha's harsh tone was redefined by her soft smile. "You remember?" She asked with barely contained hope.
"Yep." Clint sighed grumpily. "I've been an idiot."
Natasha nodded. "Yes. Although, you did have your moments."
Clint shook his head and closed his eyes tightly to hide. "I'm sorry I – I don't even know." Slowly he opened his eyes again and stared up at the ceiling. "This is such a mess."
"It's not as bad as you think." Natasha offered, but the pain that traveled through Clint's mind because of her words told him that she was giving him false hope. It wasn't that bad of pain, so Clint guessed it wasn't a flat-lie but a half-truth.
"Liar." Clint grumbled. "So that didn't go away." He winced with his hand on his forehead even though the pain was already gone. "Damn my luck."
"It appears not." Natasha agreed sadly. "Tony wants to speak with you. He saw you briefly when the doctors allowed us back here. He's – upset."
Clint winced deeply and covered his face in an attempt to hide. "I've been such an idiot." He repeated. "God, I drank alcohol."
"You weren't exactly yourself." Natasha pointed out kindly.
At least he had that excuse. Clint finally dropped his hands away. "What's the damage?" He asked, not looking for himself. He trusted Natasha to tell him the truth. He could already see the bandages swathed around his arms. It made him look like a mummy, or at least half of a mummy.
"Stab wound to the left side, luckily for you Randle has terrible aim. He missed everything important, but you did lose a lot of blood. You also have several lacerations on your arms that required stitches and two broken ribs, the rest are bruised."
"When can I blow this joint?" Clint asked after a quick pause to consider everything.
Natasha rolled her eyes, but didn't hide her small smile. "You're stable, you just need to make sure you keep all your blood inside of your body from here on out." She scolded.
"So I can leave?" Clint pressed.
Natasha narrowed her eyes. "If we're careful, we can get you back to the tower."
"SHIELD knows about the whole?" He gestured to his head. Natasha nodded. "Well, that's not good." He sighed. "I did sign the contract." He pointed out.
"Bruce and Tony are working on a way to reverse what they did to you," Natasha offered. "Shutting off that part of your brain isn't going to be easy though and it's risky."
"Natasha, you know as well as I do that I can't go back into the field like this." Clint pointed out. "I'm completely compromise. I can't even lie without pain shooting through my head. And the people we fight aren't exactly dripping with honesty either. I'd be a total liability."
Natasha smiled back at him without a word.
"Nat?" Clint stared back at her, feeling uneasy. "You're kind of freaking me out. What's up?"
"I've missed you." She told him fondly.
Clint frowned and after a few minutes of consideration his frown deepened. "Nat, you left after New York. You didn't miss me then." He pointed out seriously. Natasha's smile vanished instantly and she stood. "Wait," Clint shook his head. "Don't go."
Natasha looked at her feet before she looked back at him. "I left because you wanted something I couldn't give you."
There was no pain, which broke Clint's heart. "And now?" Clint asked.
Natasha looked away. "I don't know."
"Why'd you come back?"
"I – " She paused. "I couldn't leave you vulnerable. I wouldn't let you die if I could help it. You will always mean something to me."
There wasn't any pain, Natasha was telling the truth. Clint's heart fell ever so slightly, but he knew that what they had, whatever it was, wouldn't progress any further. Natasha was too afraid to get close enough to a person to compromise herself. It was ingrained into her mind from a young age. He couldn't blame Natasha for that; he also couldn't push her to be something she wasn't. It wasn't fair for either of them.
"Thank you." Clint offered honestly. "You always have my back."
Natasha smiled gratefully. "And you have always had mine."
Clint was moved back to the tower with Steve and Bruce's help.
Apparently Tony was working non-stop on the machine and reversing whatever Randle and Reese did to his brain. It was a good thing, but Clint also felt the need to talk to the man. Of course on the other hand Clint felt the need to hide.
It was obvious from the memories of the last few weeks that Tony was trying to make up with Clint somehow. Maybe. It was the only logical explanation. Tony had saved him from Randle and Reese and brought him back to the tower. Made him feel welcome. Tony helped Clint realize the truth and became his friend.
But that conversation Tony started but never finished, that could be bad. Although, Tony did say it wasn't Clint who had messed up, so that had to mean something.
Clint spent a lot of time sleeping, which was good because the doctors emphasize beds and rest.
Being back in the tower was normal, which was good. Except it wasn't really normal. Everything was odd and uncomfortable. Clint was deeply embarrassed about his time as his…secondary self. If he were being honest with himself he was avoiding everyone.
Bruce was the first person to call him on his bullshit, probably because Natasha had already started to pull away again.
"You're making dinner." Bruce announced after he pinned Clint down in the hallway when he went searching for a light snack in the living area.
"I am?" Clint asked.
"Yes." Bruce nodded affirmation. "You are."
Clint frowned for a moment, but shrugged his acceptance. "Okay. Lasagna?"
"Sounds perfect." Bruce smiled. Together they started the preparation. It was like before, but it was also like normal. "So," Bruce spoke after a while. "Do you want to talk?"
Clint glanced at Bruce as he cut carrots with his favorite knife. It was good to be himself again, doing what he liked.
"About what?" Clint decided to play dumb, but apparently that was close enough to a lie and he winced at the pain he caused himself. "Damn it." He sighed, setting down the knife gently. "Alright. I just – is it weird? To be around me now?"
Bruce snorted. "Not anymore than usual."
Clint raised an eyebrow at that.
Bruce laughed. "Look, I can imagine that you feel a little awkward after what happened. But we all know you weren't yourself. It is good to have you back to normal, but honestly we would have accepted you either way. Clint, you're family."
"It wasn't me." Clint sighed, "That person wasn't me."
"In a way he was you." Bruce shrugged. "For a little while, anyway. And yeah, you might feel a little bit embarrassed, but it won't change anything. Not really."
He'd have to think about it, but Bruce made a point. Life goes one, even when there are bumps in the road.
Steve cornered him the next day. They went for a run together and it only felt a little awkward. It probably helped that they didn't really speak to each other while they were running. The big bad city didn't seem big or bad anymore. Clint apologized at the end, for his ridiculous behavior.
"No, I get it." Steve responded. "Everything you were experiencing was new and yeah, the city can be scary. When I first came to this time it took me a while to get used to all the new noises and lights. Things were simpler back in my day."
"I acted like a pansy." Clint rubbed a hand over his face.
"You weren't acting." Steve pointed out. "You were afraid. And that's fine. Now you aren't afraid." He shrugged. "Someday I might be whammed and end up terrified, are you going to hold it against me?"
Clint froze for a second as he considered it. In there line of work anything was possible. "No, I wouldn't." He admitted.
"Good," Steve grinned, slapping Clint on the shoulder. "Let's move on with life then. But first, I think you should talk to Tony."
Clint winced deeply. "I've been avoiding it." He admitted. "I mean, I want to talk to him too, but I'm not sure I'm ready."
"I know. We all know, Clint." Steve nodded. "But it's time. He thinks he has the machine figured out anyway. Soon you'll be back to normal."
"Bruce told me yesterday that they wouldn't know if it will work until they try it." Clint pointed out, but nodded. "It would be nice to know if I could go back to work. Like this, it's too risky."
Steve shrugged. "If it didn't hurt so badly, it could be an advantage."
"If." Clint snorted. "But it does." He shrugged. "And knowing someone is lying to you isn't exactly a good thing."
"Ah," Steve nodded. "Yeah, I can see how it might be – upsetting in some cases. Still, you were already pretty good at lie detecting." He added.
"Before I could ignore lies if I wanted to." Clint sighed. "Now I can't ignore a lie if I try."
Steve shook his head. "I have faith that Tony and Bruce will fix this."
Clint sighed, "Yeah." Clint winced from his own lie, he wasn't sure he had as much faith as their fearless leader. "I'll talk to Tony." He promised as they parted ways.
Later that night Clint slipped into Tony's lab. A rush of cold went through Clint when he realized the last time he stepped in the lab was when he was kicked out of the tower.
"Clint!" Tony's eyes widened when he saw his friend had joined him. Clint almost smiled when he saw Tony's own realization playing on his face. At least what was happening was equally awkward for the both of them. "Uh, good to see you not in a hospital bed."
"Thanks." Clint responded slowly, eyeing the scene. It was eerily familiar. "Maybe, um, I should catch you later."
Tony slowly reached for a towel and shook his head as he cleaned the grease off of his hands. "No, no, we've kind of put this off too long. We need to talk."
Clint dropped his gaze, feeling the shame from before all over again. "This was such a mess."
Tony nodded. "Clint, I'm sorry. I overreacted and then all of this shit happened – "
Clint snorted. "And here I was thinking it was all my fault."
"Please." Tony rolled his eyes. "It took me a long time of denial, but we both know whose fault this is. And then all of this happened and you almost – "
"Not yours." Clint snapped. "It wasn't your fault either, Tony."
Tony sighed, fiddling with a screwdriver on the tabletop next to him. "It's no ones fault then. I mean, Pepper fell out of love with me and in love with you. We were both clueless."
"I didn't mean to lead her on." Clint pleaded.
Tony raised his hand and shook his head once. "I know."
"Women, right?" Clint tried to joke. Tony smiled.
"Yeah." Tony nodded. "Women."
Clint took a moment to let the silence surround them before speaking again. "So, are we good?" He asked hopefully.
Tony snorted. "If you can forgive me for this mess, I can definitely forgive you."
Clint shook his head. "It was my own fault. I knew something was off with Randle, but I just – I was off my game. I knew I was a liability in the field."
"So did Fury." Tony pointed out sharply.
Clint nodded. "Yeah, so did Fury. I wanted the assignment though. I thought I needed it."
"So basically there was a whole bunch of stupid going on with everyone."
"That sounds about right." Clint smirked.
"Look, I'm sorry. Everything I said before I told you to leave." Tony shook his head. "Feel special." He added with a smirk. "I don't apologize often."
Clint snorted. "You don't apologize at all, except maybe when you're saving my life. So, thanks for that."
"It was the least I could do." Tony said nonchalant.
"Yeah." Clint agreed. "It really was." Everything was lighthearted, maybe not completely fixed, but getting there. "So maybe losing my memory was a good thing. Saved us this whole awkward 'what do we do now' period."
"True." Tony shrugged. "I would have just gotten drunk. Getting drunk solves everything."
Clint winced. "About that – "
"Damn it." Tony cursed. "I'm losing my drinking buddy, aren't I?"
Clint grinned. "Looks like."
"Oh, come on, you know you had fun with me." Tony returned the smile.
"Um, I got a headache the first time and spent a few hours throwing up." Clint pointed out. "And the second time we got kidnapped by a crazy person."
Tony squished his lips together in thought. "That's beside the point."
"I think it is the point." Clint laughed. "But I'll consider grabbing a beer with you sometimes."
"I'll take it!" Tony snapped his fingers and turned. "Now, that all the touchy-feely crap is out of the way, should we give this thing a spin?"
Clint felt a chill go through his body again as he looked at the machine. "Now?" He asked and winced as he looked back at Tony. "I mean, isn't there kinks you need to work out or something?"
"Nope. Bruce and I've already got everything figured out. We had all the information; it was just a matter of reversing the process. Stalling is just – stalling at this point. Kind of pointless, unless you're scared or something." The last part was meant as a joke, Clint could tell, but it fell flat between them. Clint had spent so much time afraid of everything.
"Too soon?" Tony winced and Clint managed a smile.
Clint decided to ignore it and prove Tony wrong. He wasn't his scared secondary self anymore.
"Let's do this, then." Clint's eyes snapped to the machine. Tony nodded and Clint sat down on the bed before he maneuvered himself in a more horizontal position so Tony could attach the wire leads to his head.
Clint bit his tongue a moment before the question slipped out. "Just for fun, what's the worse that could happen?" It couldn't hurt knowing all the information. Not jumping in head first without testing to see how deep the water was. Yeah, asking questions was the adult thing to do. It had nothing to do with the fact that Clint was scared. Nothing at all.
Tony meandered around the machine casually before glancing back at Clint. "Worst case scenario? Um, we shut down your whole brain by accident."
"Sounds like fun." Clint frowned at the ceiling. It really didn't sound like fun, the pain that shot through Clint's head agreed. At least that would be gone, however this ended.
"Maybe I should call Bruce down to join us." Tony offered suddenly. Hesitating by the controls. Maybe Tony was afraid too.
Clint shrugged a shoulder. "Would it change anything?" He asked.
"No." Tony admitted with a lazy smirk. "It wouldn't. Well, wait, we might have the added entertainment of the big and green variety on our hands."
"A visit from the hulk while I potentially become brain dead. Yeah, let's not."
Tony shook his head. "Nah, that's not going to happen."
Clint narrowed his eyes, "But you said – "
"Sure I said." Tony interrupted. "You asked what the worse case scenario would be, I gave it to you. It won't happen though."
Clint glanced back at Tony curiously. "Exactly how can you be so sure?"
Tony grinned before he responded. "Because I'm awesome."
"I'd rather have a more concrete reason." Clint sighed and looked back up at the ceiling over him.
"How about Iron?" Tony joked. "I am Ironman after all."
"Yes you are." Clint repeated his sigh and tried to relax. "Okay, let's do this."
Tony turned the machine on and Clint's world went white.
So yeah, that didn't seem like the end, did it? Well, that was on purpose. Half of me wanted to say that he was completely cured and be done with this universe but a part of me wanted to keep it open for future stories. What really made me think was my readers. I want to try something but I'm not sure how many of you would be interested.
My Challenge (If you choose to accept it) is: Write your own last chapter to this story. It can be however long you want and focus in on whatever relationship you want to focus in on (0r it could focus on the entire team). If you send it to me via PM I'll post it as a chapter/alternative ending and give you the credit in the authors note.
The endings I receive will not necessarily impact any future stories in this universe, I'm just curious to see if anyone will take my challenge. I mean, it might even inspire me to write a fourth installment ^^
Don't hate me? I love you guys!
