Jae Shin woke to the cacophony of rain on the cabin roof and bright eyes staring intently at his face. Yoon Shik was laying on her side facing him, the gentle orange glow of embers illuminating her slender form in the darkness.
"How did you find out?" She whispered.
He swallowed hard. "I saw you…in the relic hall…bathing."
Her eyes widened impossibly and she pulled the blanket over her face with a groan.
"I didn't see much," he added quickly and she groaned again.
He cursed at himself. Boy, was he screwing this up. Real smooth, Jae Shin. Real smooth.
Yoon Shik finally lowered the blanket and met his eyes again. "Why didn't you tell anyone?"
"Because I respect you," he said after a moment. "You are a courageous woman doing amazing things. There's no way I'm going to ruin that for you."
A tremulous smile appeared, so he continued. "And I want to be around you. Why would I ever reveal the secret of the great Kim Yoon Shik?"
The smile disappeared and his brows lowered. What did he say wrong now?
"Yoon Hee."
"What?" He asked, barely catching her words.
She gave a lopsided grin. "My name is Kim Yoon Hee. My brother is Kim Yoon Shik." Her face lit up and her eyes became liquid. "You're the first person I've ever told."
She looked down and fingered the edge of the blanket. "I'm really glad you're the first."
Jae Shin will never know what possessed him to lose his mind for a moment. He leaned forward and kissed Yoon Hee.
***
Her heart skipped several beats as Jae Shin's lips pressed against hers. Strange sensations coursed through her body, making her feel hot and feverish and achy. When he pulled away, she barely resisted the urge to weave her fingers through his hair and force him back.
He looked as shocked as she felt. His chest rose and fell quickly, his eyes were even darker than usual.
A flash of lightning and an echoing clap of thunder broke their haze. Jae Shin rose and added logs to the dying fire. Yoon Hee faced the fire again, pulling her blanket up to her chin. She had no idea what to do.
He lay down behind her, once again curling his body around hers, tucking her head under his chin. They slept again, lulled by the sound of their hearts thumping together.
***
They woke to watery dawn sunlight and the earthy smell of damp vegetation. The events of the night came rushing back to them both and a inescapable tension filled the cabin.
Jae Shin rose first, grabbed Yoon Hee's mostly dry clothes and handed them to her. He pulled on his robes and boots and left the cabin so she could dress.
He waited a long time before slowly entering the cabin to find Yoon Hee fully dressed on the futon, massaging her swollen ankle. She finally met his eyes, a deep red blush firmly in place on her normally white cheeks. "I don't know if I can make it down the mountain."
Kneeling before her, he checked her ankle. It was a bad sprain, but didn't appear broken.
"I'll carry you."
She frowned. "But your wound. Is it better yet? It looked so serious."
"It's fine," he snapped, and immediately felt like an ass.
He turned away from her, busying himself with returning the blankets to the trunks and dousing the fire. When all was ready, and he could hide no longer, he looked at Yoon Hee.
Her face was drawn and pinched, her eyes unfocused and distant. "Daemul? You okay? I'm-"
She shook herself and gave him a smile bright enough to blind. "I'm great! Let's go."
Jae Shin frowned in confusion but settled her on his back as comfortably as possible. They left the cabin and made the long descent down the mountain.
They had just entered through the main gates of Sungkyunkwan when Sun Joon and Yong Ha hurried up to them.
"Daemul? What happened? You look awful!" Yong Ha exclaimed, giving her a quick once over.
"Kim Yoon Shik! What have you done to yourself?" Sun Joon demanded, trying to pull her from Jae Shin's back.
"Oy, Noron, let go," Jae Shin growled, pushing past Sun Joon and striding purposefully towards the campus clinic.
Jae Shin carefully set Yoon Hee on a clinic bed and stepped back. A wrinkly-faced doctor came bustling over and began examining a pale-faced Yoon Hee's ankle.
"Out, please. You may visit later," the doctor informed the three men gruffly.
They stomped out of the clinic and proceeded to yell at each other.
***
The doctor declared her ankle sprained, not broken, and slipped into a back room to mix a poultice. Yoon Hee reclined on the bed, trying to make sense of her chaotic thoughts.
He kissed me! So why doesn't he say…something? Why don't I say something? What do I say? Did he kiss me for fun? Do men do that? I mean, Gisaengs are very popular…maybe men just enjoy kissing and he thought I was a prime opportunity. Maybe it means nothing!
Then her whirling thoughts came back to Jae Shin's sword wound. Why does he get so upset about it?
The doctor returned, applied the poultice, secured it with a thick bandage, gave her a walking stick, and told her to stay off her ankle for at least a week. With that, he shooed her out of the clinic.
What am I going to do? Do I just pretend like it never happened?
She hesitantly looked across the grounds to find her three friends shouting at each other. Jae Shin rested negligently against a tree while Yong Ha attempted to reason with a belligerent Sun Joon.
"You should never have taken a weak person like Yoon Shik up a mountain! He doesn't have the constitution. He is not a…crazy horse…like you!" Sun Joon raged, his face reddening by the second.
"It's none of your business-" Jae Shin began in his usual drawl but was cut short by the sight of her standing in the clinic doorway. He quickly came to her side. "Lean on me."
She nodded but felt a strange prickling sensation on her neck. She looked behind her to see Sun Joon following them, eyes narrowed with suspicion.
That night, Yoon Hee lay on the middle futon, staring at the ceiling. Sun Joon seemed to be sleeping, but she wasn't sure. Jae Shin's spot was empty.
Where is he? Why did he disappear after helping me here?
Jae Shin had abandoned her to Sun Joon's nagging. She'd been forced to agree to be more careful in the future. After the lengthy dressing down, Sun Joon had pulled a stack of books from his shelf in order to quiz her on the Analects. It had been an exhausting day.
She'd had so much trouble paying attention to Sun Joon's rapid fire questions while her mind was on Jae Shin. She needed some time alone with him to talk about their…issues.
But with Sun Joon watching her closely, she had to be careful. Jae Shin had eagerly accepted her as a woman at Sungkyunkwan-she had no foolish notions that Sun Joon would be as forgiving. He'd kick her out in a heartbeat!
The door suddenly slid sideways and she quickly feigned sleep. Jae Shin crept into the room with astonishing stealth and settled himself next to her. She could hear his even breaths and feel his eyes on her. A muted buzz suffused her entire body.
Yoon Hee rolled restlessly to her side, facing him, but kept her eyes closed. She tucked her hands next to her chin and nestled into her pillow.
With hardly a sound, Jae Shin gently grasped one of her hands and pulled it towards him. Her eyes flew open and his lips quirked. He knew she had been faking it.
He gently ran his thumb over her knuckles, watching her expression. She swallowed hard and wetted her lips. His eyes followed her tongue greedily and his breath came faster.
Behind Yoon Hee, Sun Joon rubbed his nose and sighed.
They froze and then quickly separated. Jae Shin gave a soft snort and rolled onto his back. Yoon Hee stared at his profile and wished for things she could never have.
