Their journey home was quiet and peaceful. They didn't even see as much as a single sign of trouble at any point, and Arthur had to give Merlin credit where it was due. Although he did so only in his head. He was still slightly angry with Merlin for keeping as many secrets as he did. He understood that Merlin had good intentions, but Arthur couldn't help but feel like there was more to it. As if Merlin didn't quite understand that just because he wasn't a prince or even a nobleman, his life was still worth something. A fact which Arthur thought Merlin knew as he always spoke up around Arthur. But perhaps that too was for the sake of his prince.

Arthur knew that he couldn't get more out of Merlin, not with the information he had right now. But perhaps if he cornered him, by having more information, he could get him to talk. It had been like with Sir Dick. Arthur had had all of the information except for the severity of Merlin's injury before he could make Merlin speak. With these scars, he only had fractions of information, and somewhat educated guesses to go along with them. He decided to ask his knights, and where best to start than with the ones who had informed him of Merlin's other injuries.

"Percival," Arthur called out and rode up beside the tall knight, "Mind if we have a talk?"

"Of course not, sire," he responded respectfully, and Lancelot who was riding beside him fell back in step with Merlin who was behind them, but still too far away to listen in on their conversation.

"The injury you mentioned," Arthur began, "The one on his shoulder," Arthur gestured backwards towards Merlin, "Can you tell me more about it?"

"There isn't much to tell, really," Percival said honestly, "I asked him about it when I saw it, but he didn't tell me anything."

"What did it look like?" Arthur pressed on, "Could you tell what might have caused it?"

"Honestly, sire, it was weird," Percival said, looking deep in thought as if he was trying to recall the scar exactly as it was, "It's wasn't particularly big, but it was red, almost like a burn, but the skin wasn't scared like it had touched fire. The best description I have is it looked like he had been stung by a bee," Arthur raised an eyebrow, "A really big bee. One who would have a stinger the size of a dagger."

Arthur tried to imagine such a thing. It was honestly slightly terrifying, but no such creature existed. What Arthur could imagine was serkets, but their sting was deadly, so there was no way that could have been what had caused the scar. He thanked Percival for his time, but decided to keep talking for a while. Percival was good company, and it couldn't hurt to ask him what he thought of Camelot now that he had been here for a couple of months. He was very pleased with how easily he fit in despite not having known anyone but Lancelot when he got knighted and started fighting for the kingdom with his life on the line.

They chatted about life in Camelot for almost an hour, before Arthur excused himself and sped up to join Elyan, who had been riding with Gwaine, until Arthur showed up.

"Took you long enough," Elyan said as soon as Gwaine was out of earshot, and Arthur gave him a questioning look, "You want to know about Merlin's burn."

"How did you know?"

"Oh let's see," Elyan began sarcastically, "You killed a man for burning his wrist and was beside yourself with worry when he got hurt a couple of days ago."

"Shut up," Arthur said playfully and Elyan just laughed.

"Honestly Arthur, you hide your feelings for Gwen better than this."

"Because you would chop off my head if I didn't?" Arthur smiled.

"Hey now, that would be treason."

They laughed for a bit before returning to the actual topic.

"It was big Arthur," Elyan said, almost sadly, "Like someone had used a torch, but..."

"But?"

"It was perfectly circular," he continued gravely, "Which means it was either torture or sorcery."

Arthur nodded and Elyan didn't continue. If what he said was true, which it probably was because he had no reason to lie, that meant that Merlin had kept something big from him. If it was torture then who had tortured him? What had they wanted? Had he broken or held his tongue? Maybe even tried to lie? And how was he still alive? And if it was sorcery, then, again, Arthur could only question how he was still alive. A sorcerer who was powerful enough to create what Arthur could only assume was an actual fireball wouldn't have had any difficulty killing Merlin, unless they had never intended to do so. In which case, this was still torture. Arthur hated the thought of Merlin getting tortured, and he hated even more the fact that it was probably all because of him. Whether it was because Arthur could have prevented Merlin from going through it, or because Merlin had been tortured for information about Arthur and Camelot didn't change the fact that this was Arthur's fault. And that hurt.

Arthur hadn't expected to talk to another knight, but while he had been thinking, Leon had switched places with Elyan and was now riding beside him.

"What is troubling you, sire?" He asked, probably knowing full well what Arthur was struggling with.

"Merlin," he simply said, and Leon nodded.

"I debated whether or not to tell you this, but I think honor binds me to let you know."

Arthur looked up confused. It was unlike Leon to keep anything from him, so he was surprised to hear that Leon had something he had to convince himself to tell Arthur.

"We all know how loyal Merlin is," Leon began, "And it is exactly because of that that I haven't told you, but when I listened to everyone talking about how hurt he has been in the past, I didn't think I could keep this to myself any longer."

"What are you talking about?"

"When Merlin first came to Camelot, I noticed that he used to sneak out of the castle a lot. It wasn't particularly suspicious, and I remember I used to assume that he simply had a girl he liked in the lower town."

"That was your first red flag," Arthur said, trying to smile, "What girl would want Merlin?"

"Probably more than you realize, sire, he can be quite charming," Leon remarked, "But, as I said, he used to sneak out a lot, and it didn't really bother me. Until, one day he came back and I swear I could see blood trailing from his head. The next morning, I went down to Gaius, thinking that Merlin had merely slipped and hit his head, and I felt compelled to know that he was okay."

"How nice of you, sir Leon."

"Well, I kind of wish I hadn't done it," Leon admitted, "Because when I asked Gaius, he assured me that I must have seen something else, because Merlin had been with him all night."

Arthur looked at Leon, searching for a hint of him lying or anything like that. He couldn't find it.

"I started growing suspicious. Not of his motives, but of his actions. What did he do when he went out? I must point out sire, we're not talking every week, when I say often, I mean once a month. Although I once saw him three nights in a row and then I didn't see him at all for four months, so it's definitely not something regular."

"You are stalling Leon."

"Right," Leon composed himself, "I followed him one night. I followed him all the way to the Darkling Woods and I found him spying on a group of people. I was too far away to hear what they were saying and what many of them looked like, but I remembered one of them.

"Two days later, a group of people came to Camelot, claiming to be noblemen and their servants who needed shelter for a night or two. I recognized one of them from the woods, and I looked to Merlin to see his reaction. He looked… almost frightening, but just for a moment."

"I remember those people," Arthur mused, "I said I didn't like them."

"You did sire, and do you remember what happened?"

"One of them tried to kill my father in his sleep, but he didn't succeed because Gaius had been late with my father's medicine so he wasn't asleep yet."

"Exactly sire," Leon said and looked at him until Arthur fit the puzzle pieces together himself.

"So you think Merlin has been doing this… often? Finding enemies and then making sure they were taken care of somehow."

"I am almost certain, sire. It is like Gwaine said. It would be just like him to do something like that."

Arthur had to agree with that.

Arthur was silent for the rest of the day, processing all of this new information. There were still holes in the stories, and Arthur could only fill them out by theory and imagination. Some gaps were easier to fill than others. Both Leon and Gwaine had stories of Merlin working behind the scenes to take care of threats Arthur hadn't noticed in time, and Arthur had a couple of incidents in mind himself where Merlin had come to him with an accusation that at the time had seemed crazy (Catrina being a troll, Cedric being possessed by an evil sorcerer, Valiant using magical snakes to cheat in the tournament), but in the end had been correct. It all made too much sense that Merlin had taken care of similar situations and only went to Arthur in the most desperate of times. After all, Arthur literally never believed him (except for the time with Valiant. Arthur had believed him then, but it had all been resolved so badly).

The next day Arthur was determined to get some truth out of his servant. It was easier to corner him here, outside of Camelot, because he couldn't run away and hide like he could in the big castle. Arthur had to take his chance now. But Merlin never did what Arthur wanted him to, so it was surprising when Merlin rode up to him, looking extremely guilty and began the conversation.

"Lance said the other knights told you about the scars," he said, not looking at Arthur, "I assume you have questions."

"And will you actually answer them this time?" Arthur scoffed, because he had really thought it would be harder than this to get answers.

"I will," Merlin said, however Arthur could feel a 'but' coming up, "But," there it was, "You need to understand that I had a reason for not telling you."

"I'm sure you did," Arthur said again, still extremely sarcastic.

"So, just for now, I will answer one question, but I promise I will answer truthfully and without leaving anything important out."

"Just one?" Arthur questioned. He had so many questions that he doubted one answer would give him the satisfaction he needed.

"For now," Merlin said, finally looking at Arthur, "Because when you hear the answer, you will understand why I didn't tell you… probably… I don't know what you will ask, but I have a good guess." Merlin smiled weakly, trying to ease some of the tension between them, "So, what's your question?"

Arthur pretended for a moment or two to be in thought. Truthfully, he knew exactly what question he wanted answered the most, "How did you get the burn on your chest?"

"Predictable," Merlin muttered, and Arthur shoved him a little (enough to make him feel it, not enough for him to fall down from his horse), "It's a bit of a story though, so please bear with me."

Arthur gestured for Merlin to begin his story, and his servant took a deep breath before he began. His story began with the Questing Beast. How Arthur had been bitten and how everything pointed to certain death (Arthur was touched when Merlin began to speak of how painful the idea of losing Arthur had been for him). Merlin told him how he had tried everything to save Arthur, but there simply was no cure. So he had turned to the old religion (Arthur was a bit shocked by how Merlin had quickly decided that magic was the answer, but Arthur honestly couldn't say he wouldn't have done the same. Not with how sad Merlin sounded just talking about Arthur dying). Merlin had gone to Nimueh and made a deal with her. His life for Arthur's (That had hurt. Merlin pumped full of adrenalin was one thing, but a Merlin with a cool head riding out to find a sorceress who would kill him to save Arthur, that hurt more than Arthur could express).

Merlin then spoke of the cup of life, and how Nimueh had made it rain into the cup, which Merlin had given Arthur (Merlin's goodbye at the time suddenly made more sense). He told him how Nimueh had tricked him, and had tried to take his mother's life instead. Outraged, Merlin had returned to the Isle of the Blessed to demand that she take his life as she had promised, but Merlin had found that Gaius had gotten there before him. Gaius had known that Merlin would try to give up his life again, and wouldn't want to see his ward dead. Nimueh had taken the deal and saved Merlin's mother in exchange of Gaius' life. When Merlin demanded that she stick to the original deal, she had struck him with the fireball.

"That's when it gets weird," Merlin continued, "It must have been because the Isle of the Blessed is a magical place - a centerpiece in the old religion - because the sky darkened, rain began pouring mercilessly, and a single bolt of lightning struck down and took Nimueh's life instead. It must have been because she didn't honor the deal she had made. In the end, we all lived and she gave her life to save yours. Even if it was unwillingly.

"But I believe that should answer your question," he finished and smiled at Arthur again. Arthur could not find it in him to smile back. As wild and ridiculous as Merlin's story had sounded, every single part of it had made sense. How Arthur had survived despite everyone thinking he would die. Why Merlin had said goodbye. Why Merlin had said that he would serve Arthur until the day he died. Why Merlin had a burn that was perfectly circular. Why Nimueh had stopped attacking. It all made sense. And for the hundredth time that month, Arthur couldn't help but wonder how on earth he had gained Merlin's undying loyalty and devotion. What was it about him that made Merlin ride to an island just to give up his own life for Arthur's? What had Arthur done for Merlin to give his life for Arthur's without even thinking twice about it? Because that always seemed to be Merlin's answer. If there was a chance that Arthur could be dying, then Merlin could just die instead.

And that's when it all suddenly made sense for Arthur. That's when he understood why Merlin never wanted to tell him. The moment Arthur found out, he would try to stop him, watch him like a hawk to make sure he was never hurt, and it would be harder for Merlin to protect him by using himself as a shield. Because Merlin would rather die an unknown hero than to risk Arthur's life.

"I don't understand," he finally said after a while, and Merlin just sighed.

"You don't understand why I didn't tell you?"

"No," Arthur clarified, and Merlin looked up, a sadness in his eyes, perhaps because he knew that Arthur really wouldn't let him do what he wanted anymore, "I don't understand why you do it."

The sadness got replaced by glee, and Merlin chuckled, "To keep you alive of course. Honestly Arthur, that was the most obvious part of it."

"Shut up. That's not what I meant and you know it," he shoved at Merlin again, "I don't understand why you would do that for me. What did I do to make you think that your life was worth less than mine," Merlin was about to speak, but Arthur continued, "And don't say it's because I'm a prince, because you did not have that issue the first time we met."

"I suppose not," Merlin said, "It's because it's you. You are special Arthur, whether you believe it or not, and I think that's something worth dying for."

Arthur sighed, "I can't believe you are the same person who called me an ass the first time we met."

"To be fair, you were acting like an ass," Merlin grinned, "But first impressions aren't always right."

No, Arthur wanted to say, Merlin had been right to call him out back then. Arthur would never have changed if it wasn't for Merlin. If it wasn't for Gwen. If it wasn't for his band of misfit knights. Arthur wouldn't have been the special person Merlin wanted to die for. He still wasn't sure he was, but at least, now, he was worthier.

"You're still an idiot who doesn't know when to shut up though," Arthur shot back and momentarily thought that it was too early to joke about the wrist, but Merlin laughed, and relief seeped through Arthur's body. No matter the revelations and secrets and scars, Merlin was still the same bubbly annoying manservant he thought of as his best friend.

As their travels were extended, their arrival would be delayed and Arthur fully expected his father to believe that something had gone wrong. It wouldn't surprise him either if Gaius was extremely worried for Merlin, and Gwen equally as worried for him and Elyan. Yet, as they arrived at the gates, the guards merely shot them a glance and no one came to meet them in the courtyard, despite their arrivals having been announced. At first, Arthur got worried and thought something was wrong, but the people of Camelot seemed to be going about with their usual business and the few knights who passed by when they arrived merely welcomed them back before returning to their duties. It was all slightly odd.

Arthur dismissed his knights and ordered them to rest for a day or two, while he took Merlin with him to give a short report to his father as well as the signed contracts that had been negotiated during his time in Mercia. The only reason he didn't dismiss Merlin as well was to escort him to Gaius himself to make sure that Merlin got his wound looked at. Despite how much Merlin claimed to be alright, injuries like that didn't just magically disappear (they had had a physician look at the wound during their time in Mercia, but she had suggested a week of resting which Merlin had not gotten).

Arthur found his father in the council chambers and he smiled as he saw his son.

"Arthur, how was your journey? I assumed you were treated well by Bayard and his staff?"

"Yes, we could not have wanted for more," Arthur confirmed, "And the journey was most fruitful. Here are the contracts," Arthur handed his father the papers, "I hope the deal we struck satisfies you."

"I am sure they will," his father proclaimed, "You have a talent for things like these."

"Thank you, father," Arthur said respectfully before changing topics, "I can't help but wonder why you don't seem surprised by our late arrival."

"Gaius informed me of your plans to change the route on your journey back," the king said nonchalantly, "Very smart of you."

"Yes," Arthur replied slowly, trying his best to hide his confusion, "Well, if you will excuse me, I will retire to my chambers."

"Of course. Make sure to rest properly after such a long journey."

Arthur bowed slightly and left the room with Merlin.

"This isn't the way to your chambers."

"Well spotted, Merlin."

"You're going to Gaius."

"There is no need to narrate everything I do."

"Of course not, sire."

Arthur shook his head. What did he do to deserve such an annoying friend?

Arthur supposed that he was lucky that Gaius wasn't out, because he did feel like he needed some time away from Merlin. He just found it hard to let go of his servant before he was sure someone else was keeping him from doing anything dangerous. At this point Arthur was convinced that everything could be as peaceful as they could get and Merlin would still somehow find himself in mortal danger.

"Arthur," the physician said upon noticing their presence, "To what do I owe the pleasure? I hope you didn't sustain any injuries on your journey."

"I didn't," Arthur said, "But Merlin did, and since he probably wouldn't have told you, I decided to do it myself." He could hear Merlin protest behind him, but he was ignored by both himself and Gaius.

"Yes, he does have a habit of not telling me things," Gaius sighed, but he didn't look too worried. Perhaps because Merlin didn't actually look like he was dying as he had been just last week. Gaius gestured for Merlin to sit down, possibly so that he could examine him, but Arthur had to ask something before he could leave.

"How did you know we would alter the route?" Arthur asked, "I didn't even know I would do it until the day before we left Mercia."

"Ah," Gaius said, probably having expected this conversation to pop up, "I told Merlin to suggest it if anything happened on your way to Mercia. Just to be safe."

"Well thank you," Arthur said, "It was good advice."

Gaius bowed curtly and Arthur left the quarters as Gaius began to examine his ward.

Another lie, Arthur thought. Merlin was definitely the one to have come up with the route, and if he had already told Gaius that he planned to suggest a new route for Arthur, he must have anticipated the ambush. Merlin's loyalty was unquestionable (despite all the secrets that they both knew he kept), but in the end it all came back to his uncle. The facts were there, plain as day. Merlin had advised against Agravaine's route. Merlin had been angry when Arthur had taken Agravaine's advise. Merlin had lied to Agravaine about telling Arthur to go see him. Their group had been attacked on a part of the route Agravaine had suggested. Merlin had anticipated this and told Gaius that he would alter their route on their way home. The route Merlin had suggested on the way back had been free of trouble. All the facts pointed towards Agravaine, his uncle, being someone who wasn't worthy of Arthur's trust, but it all seemed to unlikely to Arthur. His uncle had always been good and kind to him, and there was no questioning that his presence had been valuable to Arthur's short period of regency. Perhaps there was more to it than met the eye. All Arthur knew was that he could trust Merlin, and Merlin usually had good instincts.

Arthur had promised himself that he would ask Merlin or his uncle about their odd behavior regarding each other, but since it seemed that Merlin wouldn't be willing to talk much more in the near future and all of Arthur's logical mindset told him to be wary of his uncle, he couldn't really do that. At least, not directly. He had already asked what Agravaine thought of his servant, but looking back on it, perhaps that too had been a lie. It was all very confusing. There was a possibility that they were both liars, but Arthur was inclined to believe that at least one of them was loyal to him and Camelot. And who was he to doubt Merlin? No, Merlin might keep secrets, but he was loyal to a fault. His uncle on the other hand, other than the personal feelings Arthur had towards him, what proof did he have of his loyalty? Arthur began to think back, and thought himself silly to incriminate his uncle like that. Without him, Camelot would have been weaker during Arthur's regency, and if he truly was working for someone, like Morgana, nothing could have stopped them from attacking and invading the kingdom. They could probably have succeeded as well.

Arthur forced himself to stop thinking about it. He was tired and over-thinking things again. It would be better for him to rest and return to this dilemma in the morning.

The next morning, Arthur was woken up by a not-Merlin, which meant that when he asked for ten more minutes of sleep, he got it. However, after getting up, his morning was dull and deprived of stupid jokes and friendly banter. He ate the breakfast the not-Merlin had brought him in relative silence, only asking his servant a single question about Merlin's state (apparently Gaius wanted him to rest for a full day before he would let him back into Arthur's service) and when the awkward silence became too much, he told the not-Merlin to do his laundry.

And that was when his uncle came through the door.

"Arthur," he smiled, "I didn't get to welcome you home yesterday. I hope your journey was problem-free."

"Almost entirely," Arthur responded, not wanting to give his uncle more details than he could. He wanted to see if his uncle knew more than he let on.

"Well, I heard you returned with the same amount of people you rode out with and you all had all your limbs, so whatever minor hiccup you could have encountered mustn't have been the biggest of threats."

"Nothing we couldn't handle," Arthur said as he nibbled on some bread, "Was that all you came for, uncle?"

"I wish it was, but I came to inform you that I will be leaving for two weeks time."

"What for?"

"The harvest is coming up, and as a lord it was my duty to oversee and organize the harvest for the land that I govern. Since coming here, I left my cousin in charge, but he is quite young and inexperienced, so I asked the king if I could go and help him. Guide him, if you will, so that he can one day govern independently."

Arthur nodded along as his uncle spoke. The story made sense. Arthur was well aware of Agravaine's cousin and not only was he a few years younger than Arthur (if memory served him correctly he was even younger than Merlin), and he had not been brought up to be a leader or respected lord. He had been the youngest son of five, and while the oldest brother had been studying to become a figure of authority and the one to succeed lord Agravaine (who had no children of his own), the remaining three had learned the way of the sword and become knights. But the oldest son had died of an illness, while another brother had died during the attack of the great dragon. The two remaining brothers were still serving as knights of Camelot and thus the duty had fallen to the fifth son.

Arthur could honestly say that if Agravaine hadn't thought of assisting the young lord himself, he would probably have sent him to do so. The harvest was an important part in preparing for the winter, and if the food wasn't rationed properly, it wouldn't last all the way to spring.

"I wish you the best of luck then. Allow me to lend you a few knights to keep you safe on your journey and assist you during the harvest. Lord knows some of them need to get out of the city."

"I would be honored, sire."

Agravaine left again, and Arthur was as conflicted as ever. It was easy to suspect him of wrongdoing, but when Arthur spent time with him, there was nothing that made Arthur think that he wasn't loyal. The only way for Arthur to really get to the bottom of this would be to ask Merlin. The servant may have granted him one truth, but he was the prince - the future king of Camelot - he would demand another one.