Be thankful. I stayed up until five AM writing this chapter. And I have to work on Monday so if I end up staying up all night tomorrow night and then sleep through work, it's on your conscience.

Yes, I know you didn't make me stay up so late writing, but you know you're glad I did.

Oh, by the way, heh heh, this chapter was supposed to be in Sonny's POV, but I accidentally wrote it in Chad's and by the time I realized it was supposed to be SPOV, I was like "Screw this! I'm not rewriting a whole chapter." So the next chapter will be SPOV.


Chad's POV.

"Are you sure you want to do this now?" I asked.

"Positive," Sonny answered, not looking up from the magazine she was flipping through.

"But if we just waited until after the wedding-"

"I thought we agreed to wait until after we had our second child," she reminded me.

"Yea, but I didn't think it would take so damn long," I said. "Six months and twelve pregnancy tests later and I'm still no closer to having a baby or marrying you."

"I don't like it either," she told me. "That's why we're here."

"But-"

"No buts, Chad," she interrupted. "Just sit quietly and wait for them to call our names." I crossed my arms across my chest and glanced around the room, looking for something to keep me entertained. Uncomfortable plastic chairs, posters warning you of the dangers of smoking and and unprotected sex—pretty much your typical doctor's office. It reminded me of the one we had gone to when Sonny thought she was pregnant. Incidentally, it was in that very office that we had made the decision that had gotten us where we were today.

After months of trying to get pregnant, Sonny had decided that maybe we needed a little extra help. And so here we were at the best fertility clinic in the state. Personally, I was against the whole thing. Why did we need some strangers help to make a baby? How hard could it be? After all, we'd already done it once before, without even meaning to. But then again, if it was so easy, why wasn't there a mini Munroe-Cooper on the way?

Before I had time to ponder this anymore, the doctor walked through the door.

"Sonny Munroe and Chad Dylan Cooper," she called. At the mention of my name, everybody looked up. Great.

"I thought I told you to you sign me in using my alias," I whispered to Sonny.

"And I told you, Chad, I'm not using your stupid little codename."

"Why not?"

"Because, Chad, it's stupid. Besides, wasn't the whole point to be inconspicuous?"

"Yea."

"Then why Bruce Wayne? What, were Harry Potter and Abraham Lincoln taken. You're going to attract just as much or more attention with the name Bruce Wayne."

"Are you saying Bruce Wayne is better than me?" I had to admit, Bruce Wayne was pretty cool (hence why I chose his name) but better than me? No way.

"Sonny Munroe and Chad Dylan Cooper," the doctor repeated.

"Come on," Sonny said, grabbing my arm and pulling me over to the doctor.

"Geez, no need to be so moody," I said, rubbing my arm. Geez, how did this girl get such a strong grip? "Are you sure you're not pregnant? Because even when Tawni was pregnant she wasn't this bit—

Sonny gave me a look as if to say, "I dare you to finish that sentence."

"B-b...beautiful," I finished. "Beautiful. You're just sort of glowing, you know."

"Nice save," Sonny said smirking at me.

We followed the doctor into a room at the end of a long corridor. She sat down behind a big wooden desk, adjusted her glasses and then gave us a big fake smile.

"Ms. Munroe, Mr. Cooper," she began.

"Dylan Cooper," I muttered under my breath.

"I'm Doctor Lillian Heimback. It's nice to meet both of you." Sonny and I both shook hands with Doctor Heimback before taking a seat in the two chairs opposite hers.

"I already have your files here from Doctor White," she continued, skimming through a stack of papers quickly. "So I'm just going to ask you a few questions and then I'll have Patty come in and take some blood."

"Blood?" I repeated, my voice coming out much higher than I had anticipated. "You mean like with a needle?"

"No, Mr. Cooper, with a feather," Dr. Heimback answered. Sonny snickered and I scowled at her. I had never been good with needles. This day just kept getting better and better.

It took about half an hour for Dr. Heimback to get all the information she needed from us. Sonny answered most of her questions. I just sat there, dreading what I knew was coming. When it was time for Sonny and I to go get our blood work done, I couldn't move."

"I'll just go let Patty know you're ready," Dr. Heimback said, leaving the room.

"Come on, Chad, there's nothing to be afraid of," Sonny assured me.

"Oh, yea, nothing at all," I answered. "Except a giant pointy murder spike."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Sonny asked me. "It's like an inch long. And it's so thin, you'll barely even feel it."

"Thin enough to break off while it's inside my arm?" Sonny rolled her eyes.

"Just...come on. The sooner you do it, the sooner it will be over."

As it turns out, Sonny was right. The needle was relatively quick and painless. I didn't even faint. Unfortunately, the worst part wasn't over yet.

"You want me to jizz in a cup?"

"Chad!"

"Well, that's not the way I would have worded it," Dr. Heimsback answered. "But essentially, yes. There's a room across the hall you can use. There's some...erm...'reading material'...inside to help...uh...'motivate' you, just in case you need a little 'extra help.'"

"That's a lot of air quotes," I commented. "Well, okay, here goes nothing." I took the cup from Dr. Heimsback and walked across the hall.

After an awkward twenty minutes in The Room of Shame as I began calling it during my stay there, the doctor did a few more tests on Sonny and we were free to leave.

"Come back for your second appointment in two weeks and we'll look at the results and see what we can do to help move things along," Dr. Heimsback told us.

"Great, now let's go," I said, bolting out of the office, dragging Sonny behind me.

"Thank you," Sonny called over her shoulder as I dragged her down the corridor and out of the building.


So I'm thinking I might change this story's rating to M. Really, once you use the phrase "Jizz in a cup" there's no turning back. This is actually a pretty short author's note, right? Weird, huh. Oh, but just so you know...

The views expressed in this chapter are those of the characters, not the views of yours truly. What I mean to say is, I don't think Chad is better than Bruce Wayne. He's the goddamn Batman. He's just like...you know...he's BATMAN. Need I say more?

This chapter is dedicated to Patty, who always does my needles and never makes them hurt. And also everyone who made Batman: Arkham Asylum because I just got that game and it's friggin addictive.

Yes, I dedicated a chapter to the lady who does all my needles (and not you.) And yes, I have my own needle lady (and you don't.) DEAL WITH IT.

Sorry, I'm overtired. It took me like half an hour to start writing again after Chad says "You want me to jizz in a cup?" because I couldn't stop laughing. Like the douche bag I am. Hopefully I'll be more awake for the next chapter.

Peace out suckahs!