Kate leaves the hospital feeling lighter. Castle's going to be okay. She'd refused to confess that she'd claimed to be his girlfriend in order to gain admittance to his room last night, but she's got no doubt that Martha and Alexis will fill him in the next time he wakes.
She scrubs at her eyes; she's still only on three hours of sleep, but in spite of her weariness, she hails a cab and gets it to drop her off at the precinct.
"What have we got?" she asks the boys, and they turn from the white board to face her.
"We've been here since six, Beckett," Ryan teases. "It's ten now. Where have you been?"
She blushes. "At the hospital, okay?" Esposito raises an eyebrow, and she counters with narrowed eyes. "Drop it."
Esposito shrugs, but she sees the hint of a smile at the corner of his mouth, and she thinks she hears him whisper "good" under his breath before he clears his throat. "How's Castle?" he asks.
"He's… okay. Drugged up, but otherwise good. The surgery went well and he was awake for a few hours this morning. I left him with Martha and Alexis when he fell asleep." She nods at the board; Castle's DMV picture is front and center, and she blinks and exhales slowly; she has to remind herself he's not there because he's a homicide victim. "Where are we with the investigation?"
"We haven't got much more than yesterday, Beckett. Without Raglan, we're dead in the water. We've searched his apartment, gone through his phone records. There's nothing."
"Not nothing," Montgomery tells them, coming out of his office. "They've found Raglan. He's been found dead, upstate." He shakes his head. "It looks like a suicide. CSU are on the scene, along with local police. It looks like he shot himself with the same gun used on Castle."
Kate flinches. The lightness that she'd felt upon leaving the hospital has dissipated, and a blanket of fear has settled in its place. None of this sits right with her. "And this all ties back to my mom's case," she muses, thinking out loud, but Castle's not there and there's no-one else with whom she can bounce ideas in quite the same way.
"What are you saying, Beckett?" the Captain asks, and she shrugs.
"If we reopen her case-"
The Captain raises his hand. "Stop right there, Beckett," he says. "We're not there yet. Raglan's been found- and it looks like he's the one who shot Castle. But let's let the cops upstate do their job and confirm that for us." Kate stares at Montgomery for a moment before speaking.
"And in the meantime, Captain? Because with all due respect, if this really is about my mom's case, I'm probably walking around with a target on my back."
The Captain looks at her appraisingly, and Beckett feels again like the rookie she was when she'd first met Montgomery. She'd been in the archives without authorization, and he'd found her out. He'd looked at her long and hard before giving her a moment's grace. "You won't be here when I come back in ten minutes," he'd told her before closing the door and leaving her to copy her mom's file.
"Beckett," he says at last. "It looks like Raglan covered something up in your mom's case. Maybe he was even more involved- who knows? We may never be sure. But he's dead now."
"And Castle?" Kate asks, words failing her as she fights the sudden lump in her throat.
"Castle's alive, Beckett," Montgomery says, and she guesses he's trying to be comforting. "Let's talk to the guys upstate. If we can confirm Raglan was our shooter, we can put this case to bed."
Beckett leans back against her desk. She doesn't miss the reassuring look Esposito throws her, or the glimmer of hope in Ryan's eyes, and she buries her face in her hands for a second before nodding. "Well, let's go talk to the guys upstate, then."
Castle's been drifting in and out of sleep since Kate left this morning. He's unconvinced that she's okay, but before he'd fallen asleep the last time, his mother had pointed out that since he was the one currently lying in a hospital bed, he could stand to worry less about Kate and more about himself. He wakes slowly this time; the light has changed and the room is bathed in a warm, pink glow which offers a nice countenance to the harsh overheads.
"Have you two even slept?" he asks, glancing up at the two overwrought faces and Alexis and his mother both look up at him.
Martha shrugs, but Alexis nods. "Sure, Dad. We got some sleep last night." She points at the sofa and the cot against the wall and he sighs.
"Go home," he tells them. He doesn't really want to be alone, but he's drifting in and out of sleep; he figures they should be able to do the same.
"But, dad," Alexis starts, but he shakes his head.
"I'm okay, Pumpkin," he tells her.
"You're not okay. You got shot." Kate's voice is thin and he turns in surprise. She's leaning against the door frame, two cups of coffee in her hands. He's relieved to see that she must have been home because she's changed her clothes since this morning. The dark circles under her eyes do nothing to comfort him though.
"Yeah," he nods, wiggling his eyebrows at her. "Kind of badass, right?"
He's successful in getting a smile on her face, and is pleased to see there's a smile on his daughter's face too.
"Is there any news, dear?" his mother asks Kate, and the detective shakes her head, placing one of the coffees on the night stand. Castle reads a hesitation in Kate's eyes, but if his mother notices she ignores it, beckoning to Alexis. "Let's go," she says, and she's waving and out the door before he can blink.
Alexis takes the time to kiss him on the cheek and he catches her throw a sly look Beckett's way. "We'll be back in the morning," she promises and he smiles.
"Love you," he tells his daughter.
"Something I said?" Kate asks, as she settles into the chair by his bed.
He shakes his head. "I told them to go home. I've been sleeping so much- they should get the chance to do the same." He reaches for the coffee. "Tell me this isn't decaf?"
She grins for a second. "Sorry." The smile falls from her lips and she chews on her thumbnail and watches him for a moment before she casts her eyes away and speaks. "Castle- when I told you to stay away from my mom's case- that was all about me. You know that, right?"
She's lost him, and he shakes his head. "Beckett, I'm on a ton of drugs and my mind's very fuzzy. You're going to have to slow it down for me."
She nods. "Okay. I mean, I spent a long time looking into my mom's case," she shakes her head like she's trying to push the memory away. "And then I went to therapy because- well, because Montgomery made me. He told me I needed to sort myself out, that if I was going to be a first class detective I had to put it behind me and stop chasing ghosts."
"You don't have to tell me this, Kate," Castle says. "Not if you don't want to."
She looks up at him, meeting his eyes with a soft smile. "I want to," she assures him. "When you suggested looking into my mom's case, all I could picture was those sleepless nights. I spent so much time at the precinct, and I had copies of everything at home, too. I had helped my dad get some support, and he wasn't drinking anymore, but I was a mess and I was falling apart. Roy was the only one who saw it. Even Mike…"
"Who's Mike?"
"Oh. My training officer," she says, just a little too fast, and he catches the blush. Boyfriend, then. Or, he supposes, ex-boyfriend. An odd twinge of jealousy settles upon him. But he pushes it away, she's speaking again. "Castle, in all my investigations, I never found anything that made me think that getting into this case would be… dangerous. I didn't think you'd be hurt."
"Oh, Beckett," he says. "I know. I didn't-" he chuckles. "I'm sorry. I didn't know- I just wanted to help. I know you think I was just pushing my way in, but I really did want to help. And I didn't exactly think I'd get shot either. But I don't blame you. Not for a second."
"You should," she whispers, and he sees a tear fall from the corner of her eye and run down her cheek.
"Come here," he says, like he had this morning, but he doesn't pat his bed this time, just beckons her forward and she obliges, shifting her chair closer. He holds out his hand and she looks at it for a moment, before folding her own smaller hand into it, and they sit in silence for a spell.
"So what's going on with the case?" Castle asks suddenly. Kate blinks. She'd thought Castle had fallen asleep. She withdraws her hand from his before answering.
"We took witness statements yesterday. No-one in the park saw anything, except for you falling. Whoever shot you took off in the confusion- maybe? And the boys and I drove upstate today, to a little cabin. A neighbor heard a shot being fired and went to investigate. Raglan was found dead, and it looks self-inflicted. The same gun was used on you."
"Does that mean he shot me?"
Kate shrugs. "It looks like it."
"But you're not convinced," he says, and she shakes her head. Damn, he can read her well. She wishes she could get more past him.
"No," she says slowly, considering. Everything's been in fast forward this week and she's having trouble finding solid ground. "I'm not convinced of anything, anymore."
A/N: Thanks for the beta, T & K! And all the reviews that pushed me over 200- yippee, you warm my heart! Happy Monday everyone! x
