7

The meal was delicious; Richard's cooks never let him down. Kate could hardly contain herself. It had been so long since she had eaten food like this in company like this. She felt almost at home. She and Alexis chatted enthusiastically. Richard cut in fairly frequently with witty comments and wordplay. Kate responded with clever retorts, making Alexis and Martha laugh.

Their conversation continued long into the evening. Richard ordered coffee and Alexis and Martha both went upstairs to bed. Alexis wouldn't leave until Kate had promised to return the next day to fence with them. As the other women disappeared, Kate could feel the tension in the room shoot up significantly. Richard winked at her.

"So. Now we can talk about... whatever wasn't appropriate before."

Kate laughed. "Is there anything?"

"I'm not sure. I just... thank you very much for coming."

"Thank you, again, for inviting me. I'm having a wonderful time."

"And for agreeing to come tomorrow. Don't feel as though you have to. Alexis will cope; you don't have to put yourself to any trouble for her."

"It is no trouble. I want to come tomorrow."

"You're too good, Sara. I can already see how good you are for Alexis. She has no mother figure, and while you're far too young to be her mother, I can see that she looks up to you and connects with you in a way that I can't do."

"That's just being a woman, Castle. But as I said before, I'm happy to be here for her."

"And I'm very happy that we met you."

"I'm happy too... Just to be clear... Exactly how good at fencing are you?"

Richard chuckled. "You'll just have to find out tomorrow. But you should know that my confidence is entirely justified. What about you?"

"If you won't tell me, I won't reveal anything either."

"Ah, mystery. Mysterious women seem to seduce my mind. I want to get to know them because I want to solve them. I want to get to know you. And this Lady Beckett... At first it was just for Alexis. But the more I hear about her, the more I want to discover her, find her, help her, know her... I write about mysteries. I think she makes a wonderful character."

"Perhaps. Perhaps she doesn't want to be discovered, though."

"I can understand that. She has suffered, and now she does something where she doesn't need lots of people interfering. But If I were to discover her, I wouldn't reveal her identity. I think... I think no matter what we tell ourselves, every human being has a desire to be truly known, truly understood."

"And you think you would be able to understand?"

"I think I would try. I think... Maybe I could help her."

Sara forced a smile. "What makes you imagine that she would want your help?"

"Oh, she wouldn't. But I... I suppose I'm just selfish. The idea of her fascinates me. Driven by the death of a loved one to fight those who bring pain to others, and save people from the fate that she suffered."

"I don't think you're selfish. Not entirely. It might help her to meet you. It's a pity that she's so well hidden."

"Yes. I think Alexis believed that once we were at court she would be easy to find; that someone like that could not possibly walk past her in a room without her noticing. But she has been proved wrong."

"People are good at hiding."

"You're right. And people are good at hiding themselves. I don't mean to pry, but... I still know very little about you. Your childhood, your upbringing, your life outside these social gatherings."

Kate thought fast. She had a perfect back story completely rehearsed, but for some reason she couldn't bear to say it. She had lied enough.

"What do you want to know? I don't know much about you either. You could go first, and I'll reciprocate."

Richard grinned. "I should have seen this coming. Though my life, I think, is a little more known about. Anyway. I'm Lord of Castle Manor, a large estate a long way North of here. I write, as you know. My other hobbies are riding, fencing, teaching Alexis... I play the piano but only when no one is listening. I like to hunt, but only in a disorganised way – I think fox hunts are just cruel. My father died when I was very young; I never knew him. My mother brought me up, when she wasn't meeting gentlemen friends or going to parties. In a way I was brought up by a whole group of servants. I was sent away to school when I was nine. That was when I met Stephen. We bonded immediately. He was my mentor to begin with – he was already popular and respected, and he took me under his wing. I didn't do well at school. I was always in trouble, I received more beatings than most of my class put together. And I began to write."

Kate listened intently. The sound of Richard's voice was enough to both put her at ease and drive her crazy with a kind of hunger for him. And those eyes...

"What about you, then?" he asked. Kate bit her lip.

"There's not much to tell, really. I had a good childhood, two loving parents. I was educated at home, mostly by them but sometimes by friends. They wanted to teach me far more than is deemed appropriate for a woman. I am hugely grateful."

"But you do not live with them now."

Kate laughed at this. "You think just because I am unmarried, I should still live with my parents?"

Richard tried to think of a way to backtrack but he knew that Kate was joking, and that she knew he didn't think anything of the sort. It was just expected... But then, a woman like her... it was almost unbelievable that she wasn't married.

"Actually, I probably would live with them," Kate said softly. "But my mother died several years ago. Her death hit my father hard. He... He isn't himself any more. He drinks and gambles, throwing his life away because I am not enough. I look like her... In the months after she died he told me he couldn't stand the sight of me because I reminded him too much of the woman he would never see again. So I left. I see him, sometimes. He's much better than he was. But I can't live my life trying to save his. I had to move away from my past."

Richard nodded, wishing he could take her hand. They were alone in the dining room, no one would know. But he knew he still couldn't. It would just put her under pressure. She would feel uncomfortable, and whatever it was in the room at that moment that was so sad and yet so pure and strong at the same time would disappear and their connection would go with it.

"And now I read. I help Montgomery in the book shop. I go to all kinds of social events. I try to help people... I inherited a lot of money from my mother. A lot of my time is taken up with..." Kate trailed off. She didn't know how to explain that she spent her days looking into crimes, solving them, and catching the perpetrators. Richard looked at her expectantly, very curious about the answer.

"Solving mysteries," Kate said eventually, with a cheeky smile. Richard wasn't really satisfied with this, but Kate didn't want to say anything else, and he didn't want to push her. He wondered what kind of mysteries she meant.

There was something in her eyes. Something deep and dark, something that he couldn't explain. Lingering grief? But parents died. It was a fact of life. She said her mother had died a long time ago. The... pain? in her eyes couldn't all be from that. There had to be something more. He wished he knew what it was.

And then he had a thought. But no. She couldn't be. She was too... Her mother had died, though. She fenced. She couldn't explain what she did all the time. She was mysterious, she was beautiful – so beautiful. She...

"How long ago did your mother die?" he asked. Kate could see it coming. She could see that he had guessed and he was going to find out. She could have left. She could have lied. Instead she just answered. She practically wanted him to find out.

"Nine years," she said quietly.

"If you don't mind me asking... how did she die?"

"She was murdered," Kate said quietly. She looked into the future in her mind, knowing there was such an easy way out. She would continue this for a few more questions and then suddenly she would laugh. She would laugh and laugh, make him feel like a fool. She would tell him it was a joke, that she was playing on his interest in this Lady Beckett by feeding him her story and it was so funny because he had fallen for it so spectacularly. No one would ever know. They would stay friends, it would all be forgotten in a day.

But she couldn't. There was something about the gentle look on his face, the caring way he stared into her. It wasn't pity. It was something so much stronger, so much more...

"Is Sara your real name?"

Kate bit her lip and looked up from the table, which she had been staring at. Looking right into his eyes, she didn't need to answer. He already knew. She got up suddenly.

"I think it's time for me to go. Would you tell Alexis that I'm terribly sorry, but I can't come tomorrow?"

Richard stood up too and without thinking, grabbed hold of her.

"Don't go. And don't disappoint her. You don't have to tell her. I won't. I'll keep your secret, I'll pretend I don't even know. We won't ever talk about this again. Just please don't go," he begged, wishing he knew what to say to this woman he was only just discovering.

"I have to. I have to go now. But..."

"But what?"

"I'll come tomorrow. If you swear-"

"On my life, Sara, I won't tell a soul. Except maybe myself, from time to time."

Kate had to laugh. It was such a sweet joke, so harmless... as well as making her feel... good? He knew about her, he thought it was amazing that he had met her. That had to mean something.

"Don't..." she said suddenly, but she trailed off again.

"Don't what?" he asked, still holding on to her arms.

"When we're alone... don't call me Sara."

"Alright... Beckett."

Again, she grinned at him, his sparkling eyes allowing her to feel safe, even though she was more exposed than she thought she'd ever been.

"I have to go, Castle," she said. Her arms were tingling from his grip and he let them go. She missed his touch, all the more because she knew she was very unlikely to feel it again. He nodded.

"Until tomorrow, Beckett."

She smiled. "Goodnight, Castle."

He watched her leave, walking out of the room. This stunning woman who was almost a legend, this beautiful mystery who had somehow ended up in his life. All he knew was that he never wanted to let her go. He would find her. And as he had told her, he would help her. He would do anything for her.

Kate walked out of the house wondering what on earth she had just done. It had surely been a huge mistake. But at the same time, she had felt a rush of relief, flooding through her body... The way he had looked at her. As though... As though he wanted nothing more than to be with her, to protect her. She knew it was dangerous, and against every rule she had ever made for herself, but she wasn't going to be able to stay away from him. Even as she walked, though they had been apart for barely 5 minutes, she was already longing for him again...


A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review - and I don't have a beta, so if you spot any typing errors or anything, if you can be bothered, please tell me about them in a review as well so I can fix them. Thanks again and sending you lots of love from freezing Scotland!