A/N: I don't own Vampire Diaries. Thoughts are in Italics.
Hatred. Blood. Killing. Those are the only things on my mind now since I found out Katherine wasn't in the tomb like I thought, and she didn't truly love me. She picked my brother over me. Anna was the bearer of bad news. I'm not mad at her. I'm mad at Katherine. I've killed two people so far. . . I think. The anger has been causing me to black out. I remember waking up twice covered in blood and next to body parts.
The first time, I was by a body that had been ripped to shreds. I couldn't tell whether it had been male or female. The ground was covered with blood. Fragments of bones and flesh were everywhere. Clothes from what I guessed were the victims were in tatters. The head was a few feet from the body and was covered in vicious bite marks.
The second time, I regained control just in time to see that I was breaking someone's neck. The sound of the snap was the thing that brought my humanity back. I quickly assessed the damage. This time the trees were covered in blood. It was female. The feet and hands were chewed off and her abdomen was ripped open. Once again, intestines were lying around the body.
Despite being a heartless killer, I can't believe that I did this, again. I've been trying to convert to a more peaceful lifestyle for Natala's sake. That's why I came back to Mystic Falls.
I shifted into my human form, got up, and listened for a river so I could clean up. Eventually I heard rushing water and found one. I washed away the blood that stuck to me. When I was sure that none of the pack, especially Natala, would catch my scent, I started searching for civilization. When I came to a town, I found out that I was somewhere in Tennessee. I had been blacked out for two days. I remembered that the festival was on a Wednesday and it's now Friday. The first body was already found. The police were ruling it an animal attack. No one will suspect me. I almost felt guilty about it…almost.
When I'd gotten what I needed in town, I headed back to Mystic Falls. Natala was never going to trust me again.
Natala's point of view
"Damon freaked out the night of the festival. He's been gone for a while. I think something's
wrong," I practically yell, pacing frantically.
"He blocked us out, Nat. Something is wrong. He also crossed the border, so there's no telling where he is. All we can do is wait," Aspen said calmly, grabbing my shoulders to get me to stop pacing.
Aspen and I weren't the only ones to sense Damon's anger; the other pack members sensed it too. It was strong. After he blocked his connection to the pack, they came to Aspen and I for answers. Answers we didn't have. Werewolf tradition states that if the alpha isn't present for decisions or isn't by any means, unknown or not, accessible, the top betas are the ones take temporary charge of the pack. I'm used to members coming to me because they wanted advice or help in some form or another, but several members flocked us making me panic. I didn't know what to do. I was the alpha. Aspen took charge and told the others to leave and to continue as if everything was okay. It was the first time I've been actually in charge. Secretly, I'd been watching the news for any animal attacks. There was one the day after Damon had vanished. I assumed it was him, I still wasn't sure. More than anything I was scared for him.
"He'll be back soon, Nat. He wouldn't abandon us," Aspen told me while leading me to the couch.
"I know, but something just doesn't feel right," I whispered, still panicked.
"Everything will go back to normal before you even know it," Aspen assured.
I fell asleep on the couch after a while and woke up around 4 o'clock in the afternoon. I was asleep since noon. I asked Aspen if anything happened while I was asleep. He told me that Damon still wasn't back. I decided that a walk to clear my mind would do me some good. Aspen didn't fight me. He knew when to back off and I was grateful for that. That was something I liked a lot about Aspen even though he was annoying. He knew limits and knew when to push them and not push them.
During my walk, I went into the woods, making sure I didn't run into anyone. I didn't care about the kills anymore, I just wanted Damon back.
Damon's point of view
When I got to Mystic Falls that night, my wolf side was still trying to take over. It was hard keeping both sides at bay. And, since I was emotionally exhausted, I knew there would be a few more killings. I could feel it. I hope Natala will be able to forgive me. I know she's probably watching to see if there any animal attacks.
Finally home, I continued blocking the pack out of my head. I don't need them to know that I've killed people. We're generally a peaceful pack. I'm hoping the surrounding packs don't take the kills as a sign of war. That's the last thing any of us need or want.
Suddenly, I heard a voice in the woods. It sounded female and slurred. Whoever she was, was drunk. The smell of gin was overwhelming, so the girl was easy to find. She had strawberry blonde hair and was wearing a low cut top with jeans. An underage girl.
Quickly and swiftly, I run up to her from behind and sink my fangs into her neck before she can make a sound, but before I drain her dry, my wolf side overtakes me. Throwing her to the ground in the process. The girl is holding her neck and backing away from me knowing that her death is imminent. Stalking closer to her, she lets out a blood curdling scream.
I growl at her. She's sitting, her back against a tree terrified. Her heart pounds hard in her chest, making the blood pump that much more. There's nowhere for her to go, and she knows it. It's in her pale green eyes. Before she can scream again, I move fast, lunging for her neck and snap it like a twig. My wolf instincts are still very strong, and I can't get myself to shift back. Control was long gone and blood lust had taken over.
Somebody must've heard her scream. I could hear shouts in the distance. Finally gaining some control , I ran. It's going to be a long night.
After hearing about a football game tonight and that my little brother made the team, I went to see just how well he could cover up being a vampire. I was quite curious. It had to be difficult to mainstream in this day and age. Why did he want to pretend so much anyway? I saw Stefan talking with a guy that had blonde hair who also wearing a football jersey. After the guy leaves I clap signaling my presence.
"How nice, Stefan joins a team and gains a friend. It's all, rah! Rah! Go team!"
"Not tonight. I'm done with you," Stefan says, frustrated. "I was worried that you had no humanity left and, that you'll turn into the monster you're pretending to be."
"Who's pretending," I remarked, narrowing my eyes at him.
"Then kill me," he said.
"It's tempting," I replied, nodding.
"No, you've had lifetimes to do it, and yet I'm still alive. You're still haunting me after 145 years. And, that's your humanity," he explained making a point.
A guy, who I assume is the coach, comes looking for Stefan. I ask, "If that's my humanity, then what's this?"
I run towards the guy and drain the blood from his body.
Once I'm through with the guy and his throat is bleeding out, I turn to Stefan and say, "Any time. Any place. Any person. See you later." I turn and run back to the woods before he can follow.
I try to make it back to the house without being detected, but I knew that someone was bound to find me. When I got to near the house I could see somebody coming out. It was Natala. Her hair swished behind her from the light breeze. By the way she was walking and her growling, I knew she was pissed. When she saw me, she came over and slapped me before I had a chance to dodge the assault. It didn't matter though, I deserved it.
"What the hell were you thinking?! Everyone is seriously scared!" Natala yelled at me.
"Instinct just took over! We both know how powerful those instincts can get!" I yelled back.
Natala didn't stay mad long. She retreated and started to mumble. "It's just... Being in charge... Panic attack... It was just too much..."
I pulled her forward into a hug comforting her.
"It's ok, Nat. I'm back and safe. Those are the only things that matter now. Everything will be fine," I whispered.
"I don't care if you killed anyone, Damon. You can't just leave like that!" She started to cry. I hugged her back in relief, trying to comfort her.
"I know, Natala. I got some shocking news that upset me, that's all," I say feeling terrible for leaving suddenly.
"We need you Damon. I need you..." Natala sobbed. I hurt her badly. She never cries. Brushing my thumbs across her cheeks, I wiped the tears away.
"I'll never leave again. I promise," I whispered.
"I hope so," Natala whispered. She was starting to fall asleep against my chest. There's no telling how long she's been out here waiting for me.
Keeping one firm arms around her, I leaned down and swooped her up, my other arm beneath her knees. Her arm dangles as I carry her to the house. When I got there, Aspen was sitting on the couch. He was going to say something, but stopped at seeing that I was carrying a sleeping Natala. I took her to her room and laid her on her queen sized four poster canopy bed.
I whispered, "I will never hurt you again, Natala. If anything happens to you, I have no idea what I would do." And, I kissed her forehead.
I walk back to the living room to let Aspen know that we'd talk in the morning. When I got to my room, I laid down on my bed and started to think about life and the pack. I've gotten to the point where I'd do anything to make Natala happy and to keep her safe. She's a weakness. I'd cave for her and anyone who knew that would be able to kill me with it.
