14
A/N: I wasn't going to give you a chapter today; I have to study and do other things – but something happened to really annoy me and now I am in my room in need of a way to turn my frustration into something... else.
Kate was staring into the street but she wasn't really looking or concentrating. She was thinking about Richard. He filled her head. She had been so cruel to him, she had... Her mind whirled round in circles. She had the feeling of complete desolation, a feeling that came with the knowledge of having done something terrible to her life, something terrible, and something irreversible.
She deserved to be here. She deserved to be alone. She stood up, balancing on the edge of the building. She deserved this. She didn't deserve happiness. Her chest might feel as though someone was driving a knife into it – but some chests really did have knives driven into them, and it was her job to bring justice to those people. That was her path. She felt guilty, so guilty, for what she had said to Richard, but maybe it had been the right thing. He... he couldn't be right. He hadn't meant any harm, but he couldn't be right.
She was forced out of herself by a scream. She looked down into an alleyway and saw a young girl being dragged away by a burly man dressed in black. It was so stereotypical – but it happened so often. She jumped down, landing like a cat after the drop. She drew her sword and as she always did, thought of Javi and what he had taught her. She ran for the man holding the girl but her emotions had gotten the better of her. She hadn't noticed the two other men – two men who were now behind her. She swung her sword, hitting one of them with the flat of the blade hard enough to knock him out. He fell but the other man was still going at her, and then the one holding the girl pulled out a knife. He held it to the girl's throat.
"Drop it or I'll kill her," he growled. Kate looked around. She couldn't win. If she went for the one holding the girl the other would hit her from behind. If she went for the other one the girl could die. She made her decision and dropped her sword. It clattered on the ground. The guy behind her picked it up. She had to laugh a little. It was too heavy for him.
"Tie her up-" the burly man began but he was cut short when someone appeared from the darkness and hit him on the head with a rock, before flinging the rock at the other attacker and hitting him in the head. The girl cried with relief. Kate picked up her sword.
"Tell me you saw that!" Richard said as he appeared from the darkness. He was at least wearing a mask so no one else would know who he was.
"You? Seriously?"
"Hey! I just saved your ass!"
"Ass?"
"Picked it up in America."
"Right. And, no you didn't. I had it under control."
"Sure you did."
"Shut up. Uhm, Miss... Where are you headed?"
The girl had been looking between them, completely confused.
"Are you... Lady Beckett? I owe you my life. And him too. Who's he?"
"I'm her plucky sidekick," Richard said before Kate could speak.
"Well... Thank you. So much."
"That's alright. Next time, don't leave the party alone or use this kind of street. Where's your home?"
The girl bit her lip and told them an address over a mile away. Kate led her back to the main road and found a carriage that she could pay to take her home. Then she and Richard went back to the street to tie up the three men and take them to the gaol. When they were finally rid of the disgusting trio Kate looked up at Richard.
"Why... why didn't you leave?"
"Because you don't know what you want any more than I do. And look at tonight. You need my help."
"I..." she was trying to apologise but she couldn't seem to find the words. Richard smiled.
"I know," he said. She stared at him.
"Don't you want me to say it?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because you don't want to."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't. You think it would be right, you think you should. But you don't want to."
"I..."
"I see right through you, Beckett."
"You're just a lucky guesser."
"If you say so."
"Stop it."
"Stop what?"
"Being so nice, being so innocently nice to me. Acting as though you don't have another agenda."
"I don't. Well..." he looked down. "Perhaps a part of me does. But most of me just wants to make you smile. And to get to know you. The real you."
"But... why?"
"You're a mystery."
"Some mysteries are better left as mysteries."
"Do you really believe that?"
Kate bit her lip.
"I... I can't be who you want me to be."
"I don't want you to be anything but yourself."
"And who is that?"
"Whoever you like."
"That's a very simplistic way of looking at it."
"I like simple. Infinitely preferable to complicated."
"Then leave me alone."
"Fine. That was a lie. I hate simple. Especially when it comes to women. Now. I have a question for you and I want you to answer truthfully."
"Why should I?"
"Because I saved you, but more than that, because you want to tell me."
"Ask it, then."
Richard suddenly seemed a little nervous. Kate softened her expression. After all, he had saved her life that night.
"What is it that you want tonight, Kate? If there were no consequences, if it didn't matter, if it would never be spoken of again, if no one would know-"
Her mouth was on his again while he was still speaking. She struggled with the fastening of his black shirt and ended up just tearing it off him, running her hands over his bare chest. He shivered, but it wasn't the cold.
"Home," she growled. Richard, having been so in control, was now completely under hers. They ran hand in hand through the streets. Kate felt Javi banging against her hip and fleetingly wondered what the hell she was doing. But then she felt Richard's strong hand holding hers and she didn't even care. He had said one night. One night with no consequences, one night that they would never even speak of again.
Don't you owe him more than that? whispered a little voice in her head. But for once she didn't listen. He wanted it too. She was sick of living for the good of others, to protect others. She was sick of thinking, of doing the right thing. In a way she was relieved that after so many years of listening only to her head, her heart was still screaming, and still able to take control of her.
Once that obstacle was gone, she did think of another one but she put it out of her mind too. She didn't know what her head would say if it ever found out. She didn't know what Lady Beckett would say. She didn't know what Sara would say. She didn't know what any of them would say but she had a feeling it would involve a lot of shouting and calling her an idiot. But she didn't care. She didn't know who she was now. But whoever she was, that girl was free. Free, young, and...
She opened the door and Richard slammed her against it as soon as they were through it. He pressed against her and she felt ALIVE. Their mouths were a tangle of lips and tongue and teeth; she moaned no matter where he touched her because he was so good and it was all just so good... He pinned her arms above her head and dragged off her shirt. He laughed at the belt of knives she had on under it and unbuckled it.
"Maybe next time," he muttered. She laughed.
"How can you make jokes now?" she asked. He knelt in front of her and pulled off one of her boots.
"It's easy. And who I am," he said, pulling off the other then moving on to his own. He stood up again and undid her other belt. "What is it with women and wearing so many damn layers?" he asked as he dragged it off her and let Javi clatter to the ground for the second time in one night. Kate tugged off her under shirt while Rick unbuttoned her breeches and his own.
"For some women it's their only way of-" she yanked his head down to her mouth again, "-controlling their lives."
"Seems a waste of time," he said into her mouth. She rolled her hips as she felt him pushing into her.
"So, writer boy. Ever done it in a bookshop?"
Richard laughed. "Now who's making jokes?"
Kate grinned into the laugh which was tumbling down her throat like... nothing she'd ever felt. She shuffled out of the breeches and was left only in little red panties. Richard grinned at those too.
"I knew you wouldn't be wearing all black."
"Oh? And what about you?" she asked, tugging at what was actually his last item of clothing. He grinned as she raised her eyebrows in admiration. Then he had a thought.
"Wait, is it really alright for me to-"
"Honestly, I don't care."
"I do," he said kissing her neck. "I don't by any stretch of the imagination mean that we should stop but-" he moved down to her chest, "-there are other things we can do."
"That may be," Kate muttered, twisting her fingers in his hair as his strong hands still forced her against the door. "But cross your fingers, Ricky, because they aren't going to be enough tonight."
Richard nipped her skin and she had to stifle a scream. "As you wish, my Lady."
Her panties were on the floor and then he was up again. He forced her to look into his eyes.
"Last chance," he muttered. She grabbed him; he was already hard and those punishing baby blues rolled back into his head for a second.
"I'm sure," she returned, guiding him towards her. He got hold of her thighs and lifted her up, using the door to hold her in place as she bit into his shoulder, moving up and down as tears came to her eyes. His hands were still exploring every inch of her skin, making every cell scream with frustration and desire. He rocked her slowly, she could tell he was smiling. She could feel it in his every movement. She didn't know if that counted as laughing but she wouldn't have it. As far gone as she was, she managed to kick off the door so he stumbled backwards. He knocked over a bookshelf as he fell; he ended up on the floor with her on top of him. She began to move faster but he wasn't done; they battled for control as he used a finger to wind her closer to the edge and rolled them over so he was on top again.
His only advantage over her was his weight; just as when they were fighting, he had her pinned and though she could have escaped there was nothing she wanted less. She opened her legs wider and dug her nails into his back. He knew she was unbearably close. He moved his mouth down to kiss her and her back arched; he slid his hands up her sides – and he winked at her.
She didn't think she'd ever come laughing before. She screamed and he helpfully covered her mouth so they didn't wake the landlord whose shop they were busy destroying. She closed her eyes and let the golden light flow through her body as it moved of its own accord. When she opened them she blinked hard and forced herself into the moment. She grinned and hooked her knees around his and swung them around so she was on top again. He was almost there now but he still wanted to talk.
"I bet you get out of bed the moment you even half wake up in the morning, too," he commented. The words came out a little slurred but his hands were still doing exactly what he wanted them to. She rocked up and down, leaning forward so she could kiss him; she gently bit a nipple and he groaned; she moved again and traced her hand down her own body; he watched with a mildly dazed expression. She put her hand over the one that was intent on driving her crazy and moved it away; leaning into him again she put his finger in her mouth and sucked hard. He felt him flood into her as his head lifted up then smacked against the floor. He cried out 'Kate' and her last thought was she hoped he wasn't hurt on that side of his head as well, then the noise he was making pulled her to where he was and she threw her head back. This time he didn't stop her shouting; perhaps he couldn't reach; perhaps because she was shouting out his name just as he had shouted hers.
They took a good half hour to recover enough to tidy up their clothes and fix the bookshelf, and when that was done, maybe it was something to do with the fact that Richard hadn't bothered to actually put on any of his clothes, Kate was more than ready to drag him up to her bedroom.
"Why the hurry?" he asked as they ran up the stairs. Kate turned round; her beautiful golden brown hair tumbling around her flushed face. She grinned.
"One night. Your stamina not up to it?"
Richard laughed and she screeched as he scooped her into his arms. "Don't turn this into a competition."
Kate giggled. "But I am very competitive..."
He was right, she did like to get up as soon as she woke up.
"No, stay in bed," he mumbled as she rolled out from under the sheets. They hadn't locked the door; Lanie had been in and left two washbasins instead of one. Kate washed quickly and dried herself; by the time she was done Richard was awake enough – he had watched. She turned to him.
"You should go home before Alexis gets up and wonders where you are."
"Wait, what time is it?"
"A little after six. I woke up to the bells chiming."
"Alexis won't be up until nine. Please come back to bed."
Kate sighed and sat on the edge of it.
"Was this just a one time thing?" he asked her. She looked up at him.
"I'm not going to lie to you. When I kissed you last night I thought it would be. But now I..."
Richard laughed. "I've won you over. You're a wonderful hypocrite. You want more of this." He gestured to himself with a wide grin.
"Shut up. Maybe." She smiled. "It's not just that. It's... it's everything. But-"
"But you're worried it's going to be complicated."
Kate nodded. "And I just can't deal with that."
"Okay then. What about this. I'll be your partner, I'll help you at your work, and if we... want, I'll come back here afterwards. But when you're visiting in public, when you're Sara, we're just friends."
Kate thought about it. "And you'd be... That would be alright with you?"
Richard knew what she meant. He didn't know, if he was honest. But what he did know was that the woman he might well be in love with was on the verge of agreeing to be with him.
"If I knew you weren't going to be with anyone else..."
Kate laughed a little. "After last night... I don't think it's even worth me being with anyone else."
Richard grinned. It was adorable. "Really?" he asked honestly.
"I don't think you need to get any more big headed. But, yes."
"The best?"
Kate winked. "Not telling."
"Will you admit it if I tell you you're the best I've ever had?"
"No. I already know I am."
Richard laughed again. "Now who's big headed?"
Kate lay back down on the bed and let him pull her towards him. Then she sighed.
"What?"
"I just got all cleaned up," she said regretfully.
"I'd be happy to clean you up again in half an hour."
Kate sighed, not her usual sigh but a little sound of happy pleasure that Richard thought was heavenly. He kissed her softly and she melted into him, soon reduced yet again to a puddle in the middle of her white sheets.
A/N: So, thank you for reading, and now you can all get off my back about... that. Please review! I know you were all totally occupied with the 100th episode (EPIC, by the way!) but you barely even deserve this. If I think you're not interested I can punish you... Love reserved for reviewers. Wow, I really am desperate! xxx
