AN: Sorry I have been taking so long to update, I decided to go into a completely different direction. If I'm taking too long, feel free to comment and remind me to update, please. A little more angst before we get into the lightheartedness that this show is. Also, don't kill me for this chapter.
WASHINGTON DC
"Alright, I'm Dr. Lund. I've been assigned to be your gynecologist during your pregnancy. I work specifically with the CIA and NSA but I also have worked outside of it. General Beckman has given me access to all previous health records including details while you were in the CIA. I have been assigned to reside in Burbank during your pregnancy as well as six months following the birth. I will not do anything without your permission. I need you to trust me. You and this baby are my utmost concern. If there is anything I need to know or you would like me to know, please tell me. If you feel uncomfortable in anyway, please let me know and we will proceed from there. I will let you know what I am doing step by step as we go along. Although I have been assigned by General Beckman, that does not mean she is aware of everything. Doctor-patient confidentiality still resides. She has not and will not view any medical records without your permission. Everything we do is up to you, Sarah. Do you understand?"
Sarah nodded her head and squeezed Chuck's hand. Chuck noticed and used his free hand to turn her head toward his.
"Hey, breathe, she's going to help us get through this safely, okay?" Chuck whispered in a calming voice as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear
Sarah nodded and let out a deep breath before turning back to the doctor.
"Now Sarah, before we begin, I need to know about the mission that happened yesterday in Beijing. I have been given the mission report and I know about the knife wound and that your husband temporarily stitched it, but is there anything else I need to know, anything that happened that could affect you or the baby?" The doctor asked with a concerned look
"No, nothing like that." Sarah replied
"Okay. I assume that you want Chuck with you during appointments and the birth?" She questioned
"Yes, Chuck stays, always." Sarah quickly said
The doctor smiled and turned her attention toward the computer.
"Okay, I want to check on your baby first and then we will proceed from there."
The doctor smiled and grabbed her stethoscope that was wrapped around her neck. She drew Sarah's gown up until it rested just below her chest and then placed the stethoscope on Sarah's stomach.
"The heartbeat is perfectly normal so that is always a good sign. I'm going to do an ultra sound now. I'll be right back with the equipment." The doctor said and then left the room.
Chuck got up from his seat and went to look out the window, his back turned toward Sarah. Sarah could tell he was upset at her. That he wasn't happy with the decision she had made today.
"I'm sorry, Chuck. I was scared and-"
"How could you do this Sarah? You knew the risks! What you did was stupid and foolish-"
"I know that you're mad, bu-"
Chuck turned toward her with a stern and disappointed look on his face. "Mad, is an understatement, Sarah."
"But I'm okay and… and the baby is okay so-"
"Do not say it's fine! What if you weren't okay, or the baby wasn't. You would never forgive yourself. I would never forgive myself for letting you go. I can't force you to do what is right Sarah, but for once, stop thinking like a spy and start thinking like a wife or a mother or just Sarah. You're not alone! I try to remind you every second I get but…" Chuck trailed off
"I'm sorry." Sarah whispered trying to hold back tears
"I'm going to go check in with Casey and Beckman. You can meet me when your done with the appointment." With that Chuck left the room without even glancing at Sarah
A few minutes later, the doctor came back into the room with the ultra sound equipment.
"Where did Chuck go?" She asked
"He, Uh had a meeting with Beckman he had to go to." Sarah said
"Is everything alright?"
"Yah, everything's fine." Sarah lied
"Are you ready to see your baby?"
"Yes."
Dr. Lund opened up Sarah's gown and applied the gel to her lower abdomen before placing the scanner on top.
"There is your baby."
A small image popped up on the screen that showed the baby slightly moving around.
"Would you like to know the gender?"
"Actually, can you just put it in an envelope for me. I want to be able to open it with Chuck."
"Of course. I'll be right back." The doctor said
She handed some paper towels to Sarah to wipe her stomach off before leaving the room.
Sarah wiped off her stomach and threw the paper towels in the trash. She got back on the bed and lied back down, thinking about her conversation with Chuck, just moments earlier.
It wasn't like Chuck to leave the room before finishing a conversation. She wouldn't ever expect him to leave the room in the middle of a doctor's appointment. He hadn't even seen the baby yet and he knew Sarah would have to have her stomach stitched back up and an exam before leaving. He always wanted to be there for her when she was hurt. He's never been this mad at her before. What should she do? Maybe she should call Ellie. No, Chuck is probably already on the phone with her. There really isn't anybody she can talk to. Nobody knows she is pregnant. She doesn't want to know until the baby is born and she knows it's healthy. She can't do that though, she'll start showing soon, and in a couple months, not even a flowy blouse will be able to hide it.
The doctor came back in the room, an envelope in her hand. She placed it on the counter and grabbed some supplies for Sarah's wound. She examined it over before grabbing a needle and numbing the area.
"Chuck did a great job. The wound is not very deep, I just want to stitch it up because it is wide and just deep enough to worry me."
After she was done she placed the supplies on the counter and slipped some new gloves on.
"Alright, feet in the stirrups, I'm going to do a vaginal exam if that is alright."
Sarah nodded and slipped her feet into the stirrups.
"Any pain while using the bathroom?"
"No."
"Pain during sex?"
"No."
"Any spotting or heavy bleeding."
"No."
"Good." The doctor finished and slid her gloves off, "Everything is totally fine. I'm a little worried about your weight. It's slightly lower than I would like you to be at. It's not too bad though, just more water and a few more calories each day should be fine. You are cleared for exercise. Just nothing hardcore. No weights, sparring, or anything of the sort. Because this is a high-risk pregnancy I would like you to limit exercise. Jogging and swimming would be preferred. No hot tubs, baths, raw fish, deli meats, heavy lifting, you know the gist. Please do not over exert yourself. This needs to be a VERY low stress pregnancy. Don't exercise too much, don't work too much, and don't stress yourself out. That is very important. I am assigned to be only your OB from this moment on. I have other patients for gynecology, but Beckman wanted you to be my top priority. If you have any pain in your abdomen at all, come in. If you start to develop a fever, come in. If you start having abnormal symptoms, come in. If you start spotting, come in. Go with your gut Sarah. If you think something is wrong, you need to visit me. Remember I will be in Burbank at a temporary private CIA clinic and ER. You have my number, if something is wrong, try to remember to call me ahead of time so I can get things ready. This is very important Sarah, do you understand?"
"Yes, thank you."
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Chuck had texted Sarah that the meeting went well and that he had gotten a room for her cause he would be spending the night with Morgan in his hotel room. Sarah felt sick to her stomach. Not from the pregnancy, but from being in a fight with Chuck. They rarely ever fought. They were supposed to be the light hearted dream couple. But, here they were, fighting because she had made a stupid decision, and put her baby in danger. Was she even ready to be a mother? Mabey the death of her baby boy was the universe's way of telling her that being a mother wasn't in the cards for her. But Chuck wanted a big family, and she doesn't even know if she can still give that to him.
Sarah made her way to the office where they were meeting with Beckman. She hoped Chuck would be there, but at the same time she prayed he wasn't. She didn't know if she could make it through a conversation right now. She knew she had to talk with Beckman about tonight's mission. She knew she messed up, big time.
When she made it to the office, the first thing she noticed was that Casey was the only one in the room.
"Where is Beckman? I got a message saying she wanted to talk about tonight's mission." Sarah asked
"She decided not to. Just get some rest." Casey said, "Chuck gave me your keycard. Your bags are already in the room."
Casey handed her the keycard and left the room. Sarah sat down in a chair as she gathered her thoughts. Casey seemed to be on Chuck's side as well. Ellie probably was too. Ugh, she hated taking sides. They never fought. Sarah grabbed her keys and was about to leave when she heard Chuck coming. She quickly grabbed her stuff and headed into another room. When he came in, he was talking on the phone.
"I don't know El, I expected more from Sarah." Chuck said as he sat down and put the phone on speaker.
Sarah knew she shouldn't be doing this. No secrets, no lies. That was their rule. She had broke that rule though. She signed that contract with Beckman and she never told Chuck. She didn't exactly remember making the contract until Beckman brought it up. That was her problem, she couldn't remember the big moments in her life. She couldn't even remember their wedding.
Chuck had his head in his hands, his elbows resting on his thighs. Ellie and him were talking back and forth about what had happened. Ellie was trying to console him, urging him to go talk to Sarah.
"Okay, Chuck, what do you want to do then?" Ellie asked
"I don't know?" He replied
Sarah continued to listen in on the conversation, her ear pressed against the doorway.
"I got separate hotel rooms for us tonight. I just don't know if I could see her tonight."
"Have you tried talking to her?"
"No. What do I say? She put, not only herself, but our child in danger. She was so upset when our last baby died and now that she's pregnant again, the first thing that she does is put the baby in danger. That doesn't sound logical to me!" Ellie stayed quiet as Chuck continued to talk. "Isn't a mother supposed to protect her child? I just felt helpless. I couldn't do anything. I'm not carrying the baby, she is."
"Do you trust her Chuck?" Ellie asked
"How do you mean?"
"Do you trust her with your child?"
Sarah mouth dropped slightly open. Her mind was racing.
"I don't know right now." Chuck sighed
Sarah grabbed her stuff and opened the door. Chuck turned his head, surprised to see his wife. Then he realized what she had heard. He could tell by the tears on her face. He prepared himself for the lecture he was about to receive from Sarah, and possibly Ellie. But, Sarah didn't yell or scream, she didn't even look him in the eye. She simply wiped her eyes and went over to the table Chuck was sitting at. She stopped at the edge and dropped her head before letting a couple more tears fall. Then she opened her palm, placed her wedding ring on the table, and quickly left.
