/-indicates mindmeld

Chapter 3: Lullabies and Telepaths

McCoy awoke earlier than he usually did next morning, and, after getting ready, left his quarters to meet with Nova. He knew she did know the layout of the ship and would need help getting around. As much as he would like to give her a tour, he had responsibilities, and his shift started in a few hours. He entered the turbo lift and headed for Deck 4. The doors slid open and McCoy walked down the corridor, coming to the security team standing outside Nova's door. He cleared his throat, and the two crewmen looked at one another, then stepped aside. He knocked on the door.

"Enter," said Nova.

McCoy stepped inside the moment the doors slid open, and was greeted by a very warm room. Nova was sitting beside the computer, and McCoy knew at once that she probably had spent all night there.

"Good-mornin', darlin'," he smiled at her.

"Good-morning, Leonard," she replied, returning his smile.

Nova shut off the computer system and stood up, "I hope you do not mind, I changed the atmosphere settings without asking. If you would prefer, I will change them back."

"These are your quarters. You set the atmosphere to whatever you find comfortable."

"Are your settings the same as mine?"

"No, mine are a tad bit cooler. But Spock keeps his quarters warm. On his planet, the heat is intense and the air is thinner than your planet."

"Would you like me to alter the settings so that you may be more comfortable?"

"I wouldn't dream of it. You keep your quarters the way you want them."

Her eyes danced, "Thank you, Leonard."

"Did you sleep at all, Nova?" he asked, using her adopted name. He could feel her delight; he could have sworn he even felt the way her heart leapt at the use of her name.

"No," she said, "I have never needed sleep."

"Our bodies need rest. Even if you are part Vulcan, Vulcan's sleep, too. They can do without it for a lot longer than a human can, but they need it."

She stepped up to him, her eyes sparkling blue, "I feel fine. You could examine me, if you are concerned. But I feel fine."

McCoy pursed his lips, then sighed, "If you say that you're alright, then I'll let it slide. But I need you to try to get some sleep tonight, alright? It's not natural to not sleep. At least for a humanoid."

"Okay. I shall endeavor to do so," she beamed at him. She bit her lip, looking away, then looked up at him, "Would it be alright if I explored the ship today?"

"As much as I would love to say 'have at it!', that decision is not mine to make. The Captain is the one who will determine what will be okay for you to do. In fact, he did want to continue his conversation from last night. We could meet him on his way to the Bridge, if you are up for it," he smiled, knowing what her answer would be.

"Yes! I would love that!"

"Well, then," again he held out his arm to her, "Shall we?"

"We shall," she linked her arm in his softly. The moment her hand was laid on his arm, he felt warmth spread through his entire being. Giddiness shuddered through him, and his heart seemed to fly in his chest. Nova gasped, and withdrew from him, staring.

"Did you feel that?" she asked softly.

"Did you?" he asked, noting how her eyes were flashing from brown to blue as her mind raced.

"I…I felt something. I felt my own thoughts, my emotions, and some that did not belong to me. But I had not felt that while being a humanoid. It was common as an orb of light; it was how we conveyed our entities to one another. I had not expected to experience it as I am now."

"It's not that far out of the ordinary, as far as ordinary can be. Vulcans have telepathic abilities. Spock was actually going to speak with you tonight about it," he put a hand on her shoulder and felt her emotions churning within her.

She nodded, still looking wary, and took another step back out of his grasp, "I would prefer not to make contact with another being until I can sort out why it is occurring. I apologize."

"You don't have to apologize to me. Spock will be able to help you. Come on," said the doctor, "Let's see if we can't catch the Captain."

The pair headed down to the cafeteria, followed by security, and found the captain sitting at a table with Spock. Both were engrossed in a game of three dimensional chess. McCoy and Nova approached them just as Spock made a final move.

"Checkmate, Captain," he said.

Kirk sighed, "And I thought I had you this time." He looked around. "Bones! And our guest. What can we do for you?"

"Captain," Nova stepped forward, "I wanted to know if you had any more questions for me."

"Not at the moment. Spock tells me he plans to meet with you at 2200 hours tonight. I said, why wait till then? Could we meet at 2000 hours in sickbay?"

"I would be delighted, Captain," Nova inclined her head.

"Have you decided on a name for yourself?" he asked.

"Yes, I have," she smiled, "Leonard came up with the idea, and I thought that it was a nice choice. My name is Nova."

"That is a beautiful name," said Kirk, "Then, Nova, allow me to introduce you to Mr. Spock, my First Officer."

Nova faced Spock, and nodded, "A pleasure, Mr. Spock. I am Nova."

"Indeed. An…interesting name choice. I look forward to our meeting this evening," Spock's eyes lingered on the distance between McCoy and Nova, and then his eyes met hers. She locked onto his gaze with her own, and inhaled sharply. She could feel her own mind reaching out for the Vulcan's, whose fingers twitched on the table. She could feel the barriers around his mind hold her back gently, and she broke eye contact, facing the ceiling, breathing rather heavily, "I am…sorry, Commander. I did not mean to…"

Her hands were shaking slightly as she attempted to control herself. McCoy reached out for her, but she held up a trembling hand and shook her head.

"What happened? Spock?" Kirk turned to his science officer.

"She definitely possesses telepathic abilities, Captain. And I believe she is only now becoming aware of how powerful they are. It seems that she cannot control it, and her consciousness is reaching out for contact. Whether consciously or not, she is aware that I have telepathic abilities, and she is attempting to touch another's mind."

"Why haven't Bones and I felt these affects?" asked Kirk.

"I have, Jim," said McCoy, staring at Nova, whose hands continued to shake. She hugged herself, attempting to breathe slowly. "But not to the extent Spock says. It's brief."

"That is because I believe that, even now, she is holding back with everything she has," Spock said quietly, "She does not wish to overwhelm anyone. It is a difficult struggle to maintain, particularly if one does not have the training necessary to cope with it. Even now, I am aware of her emotions."

McCoy nodded. He, too, could feel her fear; he could feel her drowning in a desperate attempt to stay afloat, "Can she feel what we feel, Spock?"

"I believe she can. I believe that this confined way of existing is difficult for her, so that, even without outside stimuli, her own internal state is too much."

"Suggestions, Spock?" Kirk glanced at Nova, whose eyes were now closed.

"I suggest she return to her quarters. Food can be brought to her, but she is clearly overwhelmed being around so many other people," Spock rose from his seat, his eyes on Nova.

Taking a steadying breath, she opened her eyes, but did not make eye contact, "I am…alright, Commander. You are correct," she took another deep breath, "in the fact that I am overwhelmed. I am used to this feeling of vastness, but I did not expect other beings to be so…" she struggled to find the right word, "…luminous? Does that make sense?"

"In a way," acknowledged Spock.

"And while I am used to the vastness, I am not used to it being contained. I existed as the air did. Everywhere, all at once," her eyes never left the ceiling.

"I suggest, Doctor, that you return her to her quarters," Spock said, "Until I am able to return with her to assist."

"Spock, is she a danger to anyone?" Kirk asked.

McCoy shot the captain a reproachful look, "Jim, she'd never-"

"Yes, Captain," she said, her hands shaking again, "There is no telling how I will continue to react. But it…" she drew a shakey breath and spoke through gritted teeth, "…it is impossible for me to control this…It comes in waves and I cannot stop it."

McCoy felt so helpless. Again, he reached for her, and again she shook her head.

"Get her back to her room. We'll clear the deck temporarily. Spock, you and I will see if Scotty is available after his routine engine check. He will take over on the Bridge along with Lieutenant Shulter. We will meet Bones in Nova's quarters."

Spock nodded, "Understood." He strode out of the room to fetch Lieutenant Shulter. Kirk walked over to the com, and hit it, "Attention, this is the captain speaking. Any crewmen on deck 4 will temporarily vacate the entire deck immediately until further notice. Nothing to be concerned with, just precautionary measures. Kirk out." Kirk turned to McCoy, "Get her out of here, Bones. Stay with her. I'll get Doctor Galen to cover for you in sickbay."

McCoy nodded, and walked toward Nova, whose eyes were closed again, "Nova? Darlin', I'm gonna take you back to your room now, okay?"

She nodded, exhaling slowly. He stood behind her.

"Turn around, darlin'," he said, quietly, "And just follow the sound of my voice. I'll let you know of any turns we may come upon, alright?"

Again, she nodded, her arms around herself again, her fingernails digging into her own flesh. McCoy kept up a steady stream of soothing words, directing her when she needed prompting. They arrived at her room, and the door slid open. The pair stepped inside, security leaving them per Kirk's orders to evacuate. McCoy had led her to the bed. She sat on the edge of it, still looking at the ceiling. McCoy drew up a chair right in front of her. He couldn't help but feel slightly helpless. He was a doctor. He even studied psychology. Hell, he'd become almost an expert in the psychological effects one can suffer from being in space too long. He should be able to help her cope, even if he wasn't a telepath.

"Nova, look at me," he said softly.

She shook her head, "I do not think…that is wise…"

He could feel her struggling, and he hated it.

"This is all new to you. Let me help," McCoy reached out again, but she drew back.

"Leonard…I do not wish to…" she let the sentence hang in the air, unsure of how her abilities would affect him.

"I'm a doctor, and I say that you need some help. Just take my hand, alright?" he drawled, "You'll be fine. I promise."

She hesitated, then reached out with a trembling hand, bringing her gaze down to meet the doctor's. Her eyes seemed rather wet, and McCoy noted the light flickering in them. She was not just afraid. She was terrified. McCoy reached out one last time, and Nova did not draw away. She grasped his hand firmly, gasping and shaking as her emotions flooded into him and vice versa. McCoy gasped, too. Her panic was overwhelming. He felt as though he was falling, hurtling through space with no indication of when it would end, wondering when he would inevitably break once he landed. He could hear a rushing in his ears. She tried to pull away from him, but he held onto her hand with his left, and placed his right hand on her neck, thumb on her cheek. He began to rub his thumb back and forth, while squeezing her hand firmly. He breathed in and out slowly and steadily. She mimicked his breathing, placing her free hand on top of his hand. As slow as dripping molasses, McCoy could feel her panic fading. He struggled to find a way to distract her.

"I'll bet you never heard of a lullaby before," he murmured.

She shook her head, closing her eyes slowly as she breathed in and out.

"Well, there's this one and I think it suits you. Lullabies are little songs that we usually sing to children to ease their fears. It's about light. If you'd like, I could play it for you on the computer."

He made to stand and let go, but she tightened her grip on both of his hands, her panic rising. Please don't leave me. Her voice echoed inside his head, and his eyes widened.

"I'm right here, Nova. I'm not goin' anywhere," he said.

She inhaled deeply, then exhaled slowly, "Sing it?"

"What?"

"Sing it…please?" she asked.

"Well…" McCoy nodded, "Alright, but let me just say that I tried to spare you this horrible fate. Me singing, I mean."

She managed a small smile, and McCoy grinned. He took a breath and began to sing.

"Twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are. Up above the world so high. Like a diamond in the sky. Twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are."

Her smile widened slightly, and he continued,

"When the blazing sun is gone, when he nothing shines upon, then you show your little light. Twinkle, twinkle all the night. Twinkle, twinkle little star. How I wonder what you are."

Her panic was fading faster now, and her emotions were being reeled in. McCoy no longer felt her panic within himself. The whole time, his eyes never left hers.

"Then the traveler in the dark, thanks you for your tiny spark. He could not see which way to go, if you did not twinkle so. Twinkle, twinkle little star. How I wonder what you are."

She had started to hum along with him, her voice melodically breath-taking. McCoy kept singing softly to her, his thumb caressing her cheek gently.

"In the dark blue skies you keep, and often through my curtains peep. For you never shut your eye, till the sun is in the sky. Twinkle, twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are."

The hand he held was relaxing, and no longer shaking.

"As your bright and tiny spark, lights the traveler in the dark. Though I know not what you are. Twinkle, twinkle little star."

"Twinkle, twinkle little star," she whispered softly, "How I wonder what you are."

McCoy smiled at her, "Twinkle, twinkle little star. How I wonder what you are."

"Up above the world so high. Like a diamond in the sky," she sang.

"Twinkle, twinkle little star. How I wonder what you are," McCoy sang, and Nova joined him for a final, "How I wonder what you are."

He could still feel the ebbs and flows of her emotional current, but it was not overpowering any longer. She was calm and coherent. He let go of her hand and let his other hand fall back.

"Leonard…" she placed her hand on his cheek, and conveyed her sense of safety, comfort, and gratitude that filled her up inside, all while caressing his cheek lightly with her thumb. He swallowed down the lump that had risen in his throat unexpectedly, and smiled at her.

There was a knock at the door.

"Enter," called Nova.

Spock walked inside, followed closely by Captain Kirk. Spock stopped short, staring at Nova, who had let her hand fall from McCoy's face the moment the two officers had knocked, "Fascinating. You seem to be remarkably calmer."

"What can I say, Mr. Spock? Your doctor is a very skilled healer."

"Indeed."

He strode over to Nova. McCoy vacated the chair in front of her, and stood beside Kirk instead. Spock sat, his eyes locked with Nova's.

"You are telepathic," Spock stated simply, "And as a telepath, you have a responsibility to control your emotions and mind. You have the ability to influence others, and a responsibility to not take advantage of innocents. With your permission, I would like to initiate a mind-meld with you."

"Mind-meld?" asked Nova.

"It is a telepathic connection between two beings in which the minds become one. It is a very unsettling experience if one does not know what to expect. And if you ask me to leave your mind, I will do so immediately. For a Vulcan to force themselves mentally on another is one of the most heinous crimes on my planet. I will do nothing that will make you uncomfortable."

Nova bit her lip, then nodded, "Alright, let us try it."

Spock reached out for her, and touched the points on her face needed for the meld.

"My mind to your mind. Your thoughts to my thoughts. Our minds are drifting closer. Closer…We are one…"

/

Spock found it difficult to maintain his composure within Nova's mind. She was bright, the same way McCoy was, with a passion for life. Her emotions flowed freely, and destructively.

"You must reign in your emotions," Spock said to her.

Nova answered, her voice booming, "But how?"

"Allow your consciousness to touch mine. I shall show you."

He felt her draw close and then, as gently as she could, she allowed herself to see into his mind. Flashes of memory overwhelmed her. Duties aboard the Enterprise, and missions that he had been sent on. Spock set aside most of the memories, and projected his methods for control.

'It is…difficult," she said, attempting to imitate him.

"You will not be able to control everything right away. It takes discipline and practice, neither of which you have had. But if you apply basic techniques, and meditate daily, it should not be exceedingly difficult to prevent your emotions from overwhelming yourself, nor for you to keep other's consciousness out of your mind."

She shuddered and her voice was suddenly loud again, "Can I kill someone with this ability? Is it possible that I may unintentionally kill someone if I do not control myself?"

Spock felt his entire body seize at the onslaught of guilty emotion that emanated from Nova.

"Nova."

Nova's consciousness shuddered again and she pulled back, "I am sorry. I didn't not mean to do that. I was…concerned."

"It is highly unlikely that you could accidentally kill someone with this ability. Intentionally, you could not only kill, you could drive them to insanity."

"Can I perform a mind-meld?"

"Absolutely not," Spock said firmly, "You neither have the training, nor the ability to do so. You are not to attempt a mind meld under any circumstances. The result could be disastrous. Those who cannot meld properly can damage themselves and those they meld with. Do I make myself clear?"

"Absolutely."

"I will show you how to erect barriers in your mind, so that you may protect yourself."

Spock continued to instruct her, then, once she had an understanding, he withdrew from the meld.

/

If McCoy hadn't known that separating the pair of them would cause damage, he would have leapt up and ripped them apart. At more than one point, Spock's body shook violently, and Nova shook with him. Spock even stopped breathing for twenty seconds. McCoy's heart was racing and he was more than relieved when Spock lowered his hand, and the two were separated again.

"I believe," Spock said, breathing in a little deeper than usual as if to catch his breath, "Nova has an idea of how to control herself. I will be meditating with her every other day until she can apply herself."

Nova nodded, "Mr. Spock has graciously agreed to assist me. And I am grateful for any and all help I receive." She smiled at the Vulcan, who nodded toward her.

"She is no threat to us or the crew, Captain. I do not believe she will require security."

"Very well, Spock," said Kirk, "I'm glad we've got that squared away. If you need anything, Nova, call us."

"I shall. Thank you, Captain. Commander," she nodded at both of them. McCoy beamed at her. Spock and the Captain took their leave, returning to the bridge.

Nova looked at McCoy, "I am alright, Leonard."

"I can see that."

"Then why do I feel concern radiating from you?"

McCoy sighed, "You and Spock looked like you were struggling. I was worried that a mind-meld might do more harm than good. But Spock knows what he's doing, and I trust him. I just was…concerned for you."

She crossed the room, and stood in front of him, "I am fine, Leonard. Really."

She reached out and laid a hand on his cheek again, attempting to reassure him. He closed his eyes and leaned into her touch, placing his hand over hers. He pulled her hand away from his cheek and brought it to his lips briefly.

"I've gotta go check on sickbay. Let me know if you need anything, darlin'," he said, and grinned.

He turned and left her. She was glad to be alone, because she needed time to figure out why her heart was racing.