Chapter 20: He is a Gift
Last night was not what neither Shizuo nor Izaya expected.
It was awkward and set a cloud of an unsettling feeling around. Although Shizuo wanted to make up for what happened he couldn't bring himself to do it because half of him believed he did the right thing for using brute force, but his other side told him what he did was not needed, for he had completely forgotten what Shinra advised him to do as well as forgotten the fact that he was...
A jolt of uncomfortable anger flashed within his veins before subsiding very slowly, his conscious trying the best to suppress the urge to throw something.
Even for a douche like Izaya, he still did not deserve what was coming to him. It was early in the morning and the sky was a dim dusky blue and the air breathed frost. Izaya had stayed in his room all night and from Shizuo's point of view, he could just feel that the informant did not sleep at all.
But he couldn't leave the flea to just be here alone-he could cause some havoc or steal something if Shizuo just went to work! If the gods be on his side, he hoped this week will all be alright.
He awaited for Tom to pick up his phone and once he did, he told him that it was something of important and needed to be cared for. Of course, Tom understood and being the chill guy that he is, agreed to the ex-bartender's request.
Still, he was expecting a fight but instead couldn't help but notice that Izaya wasn't his self.
He wasn't that typical asshole that drove Shizuo into a pit of anger. He wasn't provoking him with his usual taunts. Although he did smile, that grin didn't feel real; almost forced to keep an image.
The more Shizuo thought about it, the more pity snuck upon his thoughts. Izaya was trying so hard to be strong and keep his physical appearance in check although he was vulnerable and mentally scarred.
Endlessly tortured from the memories and episodes of what happened.
Shizuo dared to just go inside his room and toss him out of his bed, but he knew the best thing was never to approach the raven in such an uncomfortable way. To be honest he couldn't give a damn about doing that because just thinking or looking at that man with those red eyes burning like a blazing fire pissed him off but...
He couldn't feel his hatred for Izaya for he knows the hardships he had endured, and frankly remembered something.
"I don't hate you, louse. You make me annoyed to the point I feel like I need to hate you, but I don't even know why I feel the need to do it."
That dream...
No no. He shook his head from side to side thinking 'That can't be right-I hate that asshole!' No matter how many times he encoded those words he had said in a dream; they felt so real. Realer than his actual feeling of hatred.
Did he really hate Izaya, or was it never hate at all but a reason to stay motivated or close to him...?
Every time they fight Shizuo would get excited because he might get a chance to keep chasing out the flea over and over again...
No matter how many times he tried to kill him, he could never bring himself to ever do the deed.
Hell, Izaya was right in that room; defenseless and unable to escape anywhere for being in the depths of a monster's den, but still that alone couldn't get him motivated.
The feeling of hatred peeled off and formed a new feeling Shizuo didn't even believe he had for his enemy.
Seeing him actually cry, beg, quiver, resist...
It devoured his heart. He never wants to see that sight ever again.
He just wants things to be different or at least have Izaya back to his snarky annoying self.
Or possibly new...?
At least he got a short term sleep, that was truly needed. The couch was comfy but not as comfortable as his bed.
Thinking about it now he might just have to wash his sheets to get that stench out.
It's too quiet...
Shizuo, now curious walked to the door frame to his room.
Too quiet.
Slower that a snail slithering and quiet as a mouse, he wrapped his fingers around the handle and twisted it trying not to make any noise. He cracked it open just so he could see a pole sized slit, faint light flooding through it. His golden eyes could only see a form under towering blankets snuggled comfortingly.
'No way in hell is he sleeping...' he thought.
Even quieter than a mouse Shizuo slid the door open with very little cries of cracking from the door hinges. Yet, Izaya wasn't moving except his rise and fall of his side.
When the entrance became wide enough, Shizuo stealthily snuck in pressing light steps upon the ground the more he crept closer to the resting raven.
His feet froze to a stop when he was at least centimeters away from the bed.
Izaya didn't look alarmed or show any form of tension or a way to tell if he was awake. His breathing came in small quiet breaths and his long eyelashes casted themselves a blanket over his eyes, they were closed.
His luscious skin looked warm and milky as well did his dark hair, each strand was a spider's silky web. He looked like he was in a very pleasant and calming sleep; laying on his side and his arms curling.
It also didn't take long to notice that he wore a little large white t-shirt for his size. Guess he changed into the spare clothing.
Izaya really was asleep.
Shizuo sighed internally. So you really are sleeping, huh?
He's completely open and something seemed off. Izaya wouldn't just leave himself open to anyone and was always a very light sleeper. Sometimes even a nail screeching when it hit the floor would wake him up. But this time he didn't.
Did he feel safe or did something really spark in his head from last night?
...Appreciation?
The more the blond looked at the sleeping beauty before him the more he felt a feeling or an... urge. An urge that spoke all sorts of wrongs into his head.
Izaya was very beautiful for a man. That he could not deny.
But heat raced through his veins towards his head but although that wasn't the only area that felt heated.
'No. Way.'
'This flea can't be this... this-!'
'Cute? Adorable? ...Hot?'
Shizuo tried to shove those thoughts away and prevent himself from slamming his fist in the wall.
'Why should I care if I wake the flea up? Smash the damn wall already! Get it together man...!' The blond is poorly functioning...
'But he's just... leaving himself so defenseless around someone like me.'
Dark honey eyes switched to a darkening shade as they settled upon a pale neck, unguarded and able to touch.
He didn't know what he was doing.
His body took control as if he was in hypnosis, his arm gained a mind of its own, rising and stretching itself outward.
He didn't know what he was doing.
'What if I...'
His hand met centimeters away from the raven's slim neck, fingers grazing it.
'...kill him now...?'
That idea...
Shizuo froze solid as he heard rustling and saw the raven shift towards the edge of the bed where he stood. He thought he could pull away fast enough but his hand got locked into an embrace and was pressed onto Izaya's cheek. The ghostly hand, very slightly, holding onto his wrist and wrapped his fingers around the edges of his palm.
"...shizu...an..."
Izaya mumbled out. Shizuo, however, didn't know what to do or how to act. Your all-time nemesis suddenly sleeps in your bed and is finally not on alert, starts snuggling with your hand when you literally tried to kill them. But after a moment of being a frozen statue, silence began pumping around. Izaya was still asleep but,
his lips were tugged upward very slightly.
Izaya was smiling...
Shizuo didn't even bother to move. Seeing Izaya like this was... soothingly peaceful. God, why did he ever try to kill him? Didn't he remember what Shinra had told him!?
"...Sorry."
"...I'll never let go." He finished with a very quiet soft whisper. Izaya was sleeping like a baby wrapped around its mother's embrace. And that right there...
Is the reason Shizuo started thinking other wise from killing him. He didn't care anymore. If he liked Izaya, if he had feelings for him. He'd protect him. Never let him go.
Exactly like that luxurious dream.
...
"What do you mean he got away?"
"I'm sorry, man. I-I-I don't know what happened!"
"We had him just perfectly fine but when we checked after we parked he was GONE!"
The two men cowarded before the tall one casting a blanket of shadows over them. "Dumbasses! Fuckin' idiots! What will we tell da boss now?"
Clap. Clap. Clap.
"Oh, sorry to suddenly intrude but this is my hide out too~"
The clapping ceased as well did the men freeze. "K-Kam-!"
"Hey now, I told you to either call me K, boss, or..."
"Hiraya-sama..." the tall one spoke with nervous awe finishing the sentence. "Aha! You see there? There's someone who actually pays attention!" He clapped even more before stepping into the room fully.
"Boss, it was an accident! We didn't even know this happened and we promise we'll get him back-"
"Oh no, no. Of course it was, we have accidents. I forgive you, but," K approached with a fading smile and a dangerous aura growing.
"you should have kept an eye on my prize or else my gift wouldn't gave slipped from my grasp again..." he stopped head to head to the smaller man who was quaking with fear. K's eyes pierced holes through the man's being.
A frightening smile slithered across K's face. In the blink of an eye, a knife slashed across the man's face before being retracted.
That man couldn't feel anything until a stinging sensation that bloomed into a boiling white hot pain from his left side.
Screaming erupted as the man balled his knees onto the floor and slammed his hands onto his face. "MY EYE! MY FUCKING EYE!" He screeched.
The rest stared, fear singing a death note into all of their virgin ears.
"Now now, stop crying." K turned around swiftly greeting the others.
"What will make me truly happy is to get my gift back."
"Find him or I might have to do everything myself."