Chapter Eight
Akane, Ranma, and fox-girl Shampoo were all up in Akane's room. Akane sat down on her bed with Ranma on the floor and Shampoo sitting at the desk.
"Ranma, Shampoo and I were just talking, and we feel we all need to get a few things confirmed between the three of us." Akane started. "I know from my vision that our fathers are not going to stop trying to get us married, and Shampoo's grandmother won't stop either. Since no one's going to stop until a result is made, we might as well figure out how to survive the storm."
"Wouldn't it make more sense to wait until the third girl shows up?" Ranma asked.
"Whatever we come up with here will apply to her too, and accomodations will be made if something is different about her for some reason. But think of it this way, when Ukyo shows up, we'll have to explain to her this unusual situation and she's likely going to need a lot of convincing to be a part of it. If we can make this work before then, then it should be easier to get her to cooperate."
"Do we really even want this?" Ranma asked.
"What you mean?" Shampoo asked.
"I mean is this really something we want to even try? It just sounds too absurd."
"More absurd than instant sex change just add water?" Akane asked. "And would you prefer the alternative where me, Shampoo, and Ukyo fight over you like a piece of meat without even caring what you think?"
"But a harem is crazy. No one in Japan has harems these days." Ranma countered.
Akane nodded. "True, but mistresses are not uncommon. We could avoid the legal issue by saying legally two of us are just mistresses but as far we're concerned we're all wives."
"Who gets to be the legal wife then?" Ranma asked.
"Shampoo is by Chinese law." The purple-haired Amazon noted.
"I think he means Japanese law, which wouldn't recognize your marriage as official yet." Akane pointed.
"Why not?" Shampoo asked.
"Marriage works differently here. Unless it's documented and appraised the government doesn't recognize it as real. So unless someone in China gave you an actual marriage license and certificate, here it's just a claim to him no different than my own."
Shampoo looked crestfallen at that. "So... Shampoo just suitor then? No wife yet?"
Suddenly Akane's heart ached for the girl. 'She really wants to be with Ranma. This isn't just about some Amazon tradition or expectation, she really does want him in her life.'
When it came to Shampoo in Akane's vision, it was easy to think of the Chinese girl as having all the wrong reasons for what she did. It was easy to assume that she was only pursuing him because of some stone age law and any interest beyond that was likely shallow and a refusal to admit defeat.
'Then again most people could just as easily say the same thing about me if they saw what I saw.' Akane grimly told herself. 'None of us were saints. But here we have a chance to change that and I'll be damned if I don't try. Even if it means I'm not the only one who can call herself Mrs. Saotome.'
For some reason, calling herself that made her heart flutter. But she had to be serious right now so she pushed that aside. "Also, while we're here, I think I should warn you guys about some of the things we really should be prepared for."
Ranma and Shampoo gave her their complete attention. "Our most immediate concern is Ryoga, who should arrive first and within a week or so, assuming my vision is accurate even if not dead-on. What makes him a concern is he's dead-set on getting revenge on Ranma for something that's his own fault. He challenged Ranma to a duel over bread but didn't show up for four days, and decided to follow Ranma to China and got a curse by mistake."
"What's his curse?" Ranma asked, wondering what to be on the look for.
"Hard to say. Since your curses are different his might be too. But he showed up in human form so look for a boy with a yellow bandanna and umbrella showing up. He'll say Ranma owes him a fight, but whatever you do refuse to fight him. No matter what, don't give him what he wants."
"Why not?" Ranma asked, the idea of turning down a challenge not appealing to him.
"If you do he'll never stop. He doesn't want to have a simple spar Ranma, he wants to utterly defeat you and humiliate you. I don't know what would be enough for him, but if you keep beating him, which I know you can and will, he won't ever stop. He'll even pretend to be your friend so he can take advantage of you, and it'll be over a year before he starts acting like it's not worth it anymore. You can either fight him every time it comes up, or you can refuse to play his game. What do you think is better?"
"I can't refuse a challenge. It goes against the Warrior's Code." Ranma told her.
At that choice of words, Akane frowned, but not in anger. "Ranma, in my dream Ryoga used his curse to come between us. You knew he had a curse, but I didn't, and because you felt guilty about him getting it, you promised him not to tell anyone." 'With the exception of Akari.' "You said it was part of the Warrior's Code not to say anything about this."
Ranma nodded. "That's right."
Akane shook her head. "The problem was Ryoga didn't care. He knew you wouldn't say a word so he used your promise against you. I ended up making him my pet and he rubbed that in your face how he could spend time with me and you couldn't. You couldn't come out and tell me about it so you tried keeping him away from me, making it look like you were picking on my pet instead of protecting me. He wanted you and me to turn against each other, and he almost succeeded all because you took your honor too seriously."
"Honor is serious." He told her.
"Shampoo agree." The Amazon added.
"I know, but if you take it too seriously it will be used against you. Ryoga knew you wouldn't incriminate him so he tried to make you look like the bad guy. What if someone else tries the same thing? What if you're challenged into a no-win scenario? Will you take it simply because you might be badmouthed if you don't?"
"I don't believe in no-win scenarios." Ranma firmly stated, as if that ended the discussion.
Akane sighed in frustration. "Ranma, think about it like this. Kuno would sometimes make this the conditions for a fight with me, if I won my prize was a date with him and if he won his prize was a date with me. That's a no-win scenario for me, isn't it?"
Ranma struggled to see a way around it. "Ummm... I guess. But there has to be a way to avoid losing."
"There is, by refusing to go along with it. If you don't play his game he can't win. You can't win either but you also can't lose. That's why I refuse to acknowledge his challenges. You may think of it as dishonorable to refuse a challenge, but I'd rather do that then give him what he's trying to get."
"No blame you." Shampoo asked.
"Couldn't you just change the terms to be more fair for you?" Ranma asked.
"I have Ranma but he won't listen. You're not getting my point. Sometimes the enemy won't give you that luxury. If you had to fight one of the Amazons, do you think they'd let you decide the terms? Or if Kuno challenged you, do you think he'd ask you what you'd think is fair?"
Ranma was going to argue, but his mouth failed him once he actually thought that last statement over. Given the rules of the Joketsuzoku he did know, and what he had seen and heard regarding Kuno's cognitive capabilities, Akane's claim was not without merit.
After a moment, he managed to speak again. "What do you want from me Akane? Am I supposed to only do something from now on when I have your permission? I can't do that. I've always done things on my terms when possible and I don't plan on that changing." He told her rather defensively, trying to reassert a sense of control over himself he worried she was trying to take from him even if it was for his own good.
"I know Ranma and I'm not telling you to stop. But this isn't just about you anymore." Akane told her stubborn fiancee. "Just promise me that if something happens and it doesn't affect just you, don't act like it does. Please?"
"Akane right." Shampoo agreed, using the Japanese girl's name for the first time. She then knelt down before Ranma and started nuzzling his chest and under his chin comfortingly, exactly like an animal that wanted to be petted. She even gave a strange vulpine purr, something Akane wasn't certain even existed. And judging from Ranma's reaction, this wasn't the first time she had done this.
Not wanting to feel left out, Akane knelt down beside the young man too and took his had in her own, and gave him the sweetest smile she could. "Ranma, we care for you and we will support you in anything you choose to do. I'm sorry if it sounds like I'm trying to control you. I'm not, I just want what's best for you."
"Thank you Akane. You too Shampoo." He said to both girls.
Shampoo wagged her tail a bit, but then she perked up her head and started sniffing. "Someone here. On other side of door."
Akane immediately frowned, got up, and opened the door only to see Nabiki's back, desperately trying to look like she had just been passing by. "Nabiki, I'm not going to tolerate eavesdropping on my love life."
"I didn't hear a thing." The middle Tendo daughter said.
"Even so, if I wanted you or anyone else to know something I'd tell you. My secrets are not yours to sell." She then closed the door without waiting for a response.
Dinner came and Genma happened to be in his mule form at first. He tried to go ahead and eat first but Kasumi refused to allow him to enter her house and track dirt on the floor with his hooves, so he had to wait until she brought him some hot water, which came after everything else had been set up.
Fox-girl Shampoo sat down on Ranma's side opposite Akane, much to Soun's displeasure. "Could someone please tell me why she's here."
"I invited her to stay for dinner Dad. Nothing wrong with that." Akane told him.
"You are aware she's trying to take your fiancée away from you right?" The mustachioed man asked his youngest daughter.
"We worked that out this afternoon Dad. We know how to handle this."
"How so?" Soun and Nabiki asked.
"Can we please change the subject?" Ranma asked, not liking the looks he was getting from Soun and Nabiki because of this.
"Starting tomorrow I'll have a job." Genma told everyone.
"Where? A petting zoo?" Ranma asked, making Nabiki laugh.
"No, I'm going to be working as a human." Genma told his son.
"Good because I'm pretty sure they don't pay animals. Unless you like working for buckets of oats." Akane commented.
"I'll have you know I have a respectable job. There's this clinic in town that had a position open and I took it."
Akane resisted a scoff out loud but allowed herself that luxury in her head. 'So he got it here too? I wonder how long this will last since my dream didn't show that.' "Just remember you need hands not hooves Mr. Saotome."
"I'm aware of that Akane."
"Oh that reminds me." Kasumi spoke up. "Akane, next time you're passing Tofu's clinic could you return this book I borrowed?" She held out a book on pressure points.
"I suppose, but maybe Nabiki should instead. I did tell him that Nabiki would stop by later to cover todays visit."
"Wait, why me?" The middle Tendo asked.
"Do you have anything better to do?" Akane asked back. "Besides, since you know about our funds better than any of us why not you?"
"It's not coming out of my personal funds."
"I never said it would have to."
"Would you do it Nabiki? It's not right to refuse Tofu payment for his generous work." Kasumi asked.
Nabiki sighed. "Fine, I'll do it. After I'm done here."
"Is something wrong?" Shampoo politely asked.
"No nothing really." Akane simply told her. Shampoo just shrugged.
The next day Akane and Ranma went to school, this time they managed to avoid getting Ranma wet, and there was once again a group of boys waiting for Akane. This time however, they just stood there, making no attempt to subdue here.
'Are they finally giving up?' Akane asked herself, stopping in front of them to see if this was true. "What's going on? Is this some kind of new trick?" She asked for appearances, taking on a stance to complete the performance.
One of the boys stepped forward. "Akane Tendo, we won't fight you anymore."
"We had a meeting." Another spoke up. "We all decided to choke down our sorrow, and accept your engagement to Ranma Saotome." A few of them started shedding tears.
Akane lightly smiled, grateful. "About time. Listen boys, you want to get a girl to like you, try more traditional methods such as asking her out, okay?"
Most of them nodded, but one stepped forward in defiance. Akane now recognized him, since the bandages obscuring his face were a dead giveaway.
"Akane, a base rumor states that the demon-allied Ranma Saotome has bested me in combat. While they might leave the battlefield to defend themselves, I shall never admit defeat." He then quivered a little bit, obviously not fully recovered, and dropped to his knees, using his bokken to keep the rest of him from following.
"Kuno's claims are nonsense, but the evidence on his body is real. If Ranma Saotome could beat Kuno, the best fighter here so easily, then the rest of us have no chance of winning." The crowd admitted. "We don't like it, but we've decided that we gotta get over you."
Akane turned to Ranma. "Oh I'm so crushed. Hold me Ranma, make the pain go away." She said sarcastically. Either way, Ranma didn't move towards her.
"I will never accept defeat." Kuno repeated as he got back to his feet. "Whether that unholy Ranma summons one or one-thousand demons, it matters not to Tatewaki Kuno." He then removed his bandages, showing the bruises and scratch marks he got from Ranma and fox-girl Shampoo yesterday.
"For the last time, I don't summon demons." Ranma yelled, standing before the kendoist. "You were beat fair and square. Get over it."
Kuno lifted his bokken up over his head, ready to attack. "I'll slay thee!" Because he wasn't as fast as normal, Ranma had no trouble kicking him and sending him flying back.
"Whatever. Someday he's got to learn."
"I wouldn't be so sure of that Ranma." Akane told her fiancee.
Later in the day it was gym class. Ranma and the boys were doing rhythmic exercises and Akane and the girls were playing baseball. Ranma was doing some impressive feats on the chin-up bars, showing swings, hand stands, and even graceful landings much to the amusement of his classmates.
"Wow, Ranma's pretty amazing." Hiroshi commented.
"I heard that he went abroad to study acrobats in China." Daisuke noted.
"It's kenpo, not acrobats." Ranma clarified as he sat down beside Hiroshi.
On the other side of the field they could see and hear the girls play their game. Akane's team was at the field and the opposing team just got their second out. Akane herself was in left field.
"So Ranma," Hiroshi started, regaining the pigtailed boy's attention. "How far have you gone with Akane?"
"What?" He asked, not sure he heard right.
"Don't play innocent. You're her fiancee right?" Daisuke added, also curious about this.
"Fiancee maybe, husband definitely not." Ranma told them.
"So? Since when is that mandatory for most things nowadays?" Daisuke followed up.
"I'm sure you've at least done something with her." Hiroshi claimed.
"That's none of your business." Ranma told them both, getting a bit irritated at thier nosiness.
"Here it comes Akane." One of the girls shouted, and Ranma managed to see her jump higher than a non-martial artist could to catch the flyball. Now her team could be at bat.
"With a great girl like that, how could you not have your hands all over her?" Daisuke asked.
Ranma snorted. "Simple, I don't want to become one of the guys she hits."
"And a guy like you can't take a hit?" Hiroshi asked.
"Just cause I can take it doesn't mean I'm eager to get it." He told his classmate.
"Still, she's really cute so you won't be able to resist for long." Hiroshi stated.
Ranma didn't reply, he just watched Akane go up to home plate and hit the ball. It headed right for him by sheer accident, but since he had been paying attention he caught it as easily and any player would have.
Akane saw that and sighed in relief. 'I'm glad I didn't hit him.' "Sorry, that one got away."
Ranma nodded and threw it back to the pitcher. "Does that count as an out?"
The umpire shook her head. "Foul ball. Akane, try again."
After school the two had no problems being assaulted by Kuno again, and walked home chatting calmly.
"Hey, let's stop by Tofu's, just to see if your father's working as a human or mule." Akane suggested. Ranma shrugged but didn't object.
They turned down a corner towards Tofu's clinic, and saw Genma as a human sweeping up the sidewalk out front. "At least you're not washing the concrete Pop." Ranma commented.
"Too risky working with water like that." He claimed. "So what brings you two here? Just passing by?"
"Oh hi you two." Tofu greeted walking up to the teenagers. "You need me to examine something?"
Akane shook her head. "No, just saying hi to Ranma's father."
"Oh so he's your father." Tofu replied, then looked between the two Saotomes. "Not much of a resemblence is there?"
"Oh he's definitely my son." Genma stated.
Akane nodded. "Yeah, they have the same appetite." She then giggled a little. "Hey, did Nabiki show up yet?"
Tofu nodded. "Yes, and she even brought back that book I let Kasumi borrow." As expected, his face turned a bit red upon mentioning her name.
"Maybe she'll come by later to thank you for letting her borrow it." Akane said.
"You... you think?" Tofu asked, his glasses fogging up.
Akane shrugged. "You never know." She then remember in her vision Kasumi was supposed to arrive in a little bit. "We should probably get going. See you at home later Mr. Saotome."
The two adults waved off the two teens.
"Were you trying to get away?" Ranma asked.
"Word of warning Ranma, never be around Dr. Tofu when Kasumi's around. He's got a thing for her, but he gets so nervous that he forgets what he's doing. If he was treating you and she showed up, you'd be lucky to have your head face forward."
"You're exaggerating, right?" He asked.
Akane shook her head. "If you don't believe me you're welcome to see for yourself."
"Naw, I'm good." He told her. "Wait, should we warn my old man?"
Akane thought about it, then chuckled. "Let him figure it out for himself. Consider it payback for the Neko-ken training."
"That bad?"
"Bad enough."
Hey readers, here's a small poll for what Shampoo might do in the next chapter on the subject of enrolling in school. Pick any once or two choices and leave them with a review.
1. tell them and come in school uniform
2. tell them and come in her normal cloths
3. don't tell them and show up in school uniform
4. don't tell them and show up in her normal cloths
5. don't go to school at all like in canon