Chapter 17
Her heart was beating wildly and her chest heaved as Lou waited for the doctor to talk. She couldn't really tell by his expression if it was good or bad news that was in store for her. It seemed like ages until the doctor finally began. Lou didn't know how she felt any more. She was dying to know what he had to say and finish her agony, but at the same time she was scared stiff, and she wished she could be deaf to his words.
"Well, Mrs. McCloud," the doctor began, and Louise began wringing her hands nervously. Her breath got caught in her throat and a cold sweat glistened on her forehead. "I managed to extract the bullet and clean the wound. We've been lucky. Just an inch and your husband would be a dead man now."
At his words Lou let out the breath she was holding, and asked hesitantly, "You mean he's gonna be fine?"
"It's too early to tell," the doctor answered sincerely. "He's lost quite a lot of blood and he's very weak. The following hours are crucial."
Lou sighed wearily. Worries were not over yet. "Can I see him?" Lou asked with a soft voice. The doctor just nodded and she didn't waste any seconds as she stepped into the bedroom straightaway, followed by Doctor McNeil. She spotted Teaspoon sitting next to the bed and on seeing her, the marshal stood up and cast a sympathetic look in her direction. Louise ignored him and approached the bed tentatively; her eyes fixed on her husband. He was almost in the same position as she had last seen him. His eyes were shut tight, and his lower abdomen was now wrapped up with a wide bandage.
"Why is he out?" Lou asked, fear evident in her voice. Kid looked as pale as before and watching him like that was breaking her inside.
"As I told you, Mrs. McCloud," the doctor talked behind her, "your husband's lost a fair quantity of blood. So it's just a natural reaction of his body trying to restore his strength. Nothing else."
Lou nodded in understanding and came closer to where Kid laid unconscious. She leaned over and whispered in his ear, "You got to get well, Kid. Please come back to me." After brushing her cheek against his tenderly she planted a kiss on his forehead, and suddenly she swirled around. "He's burning hot!" she almost cried, alarm evident in her voice and her expression.
"It's a common symptom in cases of wounds or other injuries," Doctor McNeil explained patiently. "I'll leave you something to help bring the temperature down. Hopefully, it won't be a problem." Louise nodded again, afraid of finding anything else wrong with Kid, and she didn't dare to ask what would happen if his fever didn't come down. Never before had she felt so afraid in her life, not even when Kid had been away in the war or those months when she had been ignorant of his whereabouts after the war. Now she knew with certainty that his life was in peril. Despite the doctor's explanations to placate her worries she wasn't sure if her husband was going to be all right. The idea of him weakening away scared her to death.
Louise turned her eyes to Kid once again and wrapped her hand around his unmoving one. The doctor continued talking behind, but she didn't even bother to turn her head. "I'll go now and be back first thing in the morning. If he comes around or … anything, you know where to find me, Marshal."
Teaspoon approached the doctor and came to shake hands with him, silently thankful for the man's choice of words. He was worried about Lou; she didn't look very well at all, and the marshal hoped that Kid would come out of this situation soon for his wife's sake. "Thank you, Doc, for all you've done," Teaspoon said as he walked to the bedroom door with Doctor McNeil.
"Simply did my duty. Just hope it will be enough," the physician muttered as he stepped out of the room. "Please don't bother yourself. I'll show myself out."
Teaspoon nodded and shaking his hand once again he returned to the room. Lou stood next to her husband, her eyes fixed on him and his hand clutched between hers. "Honey, you watchin' him like a hawk won't make him feel better any sooner."
"I know," she answered in a very soft voice.
"Why don't you go and have somethin' to eat and rest for a while?" Teaspoon suggested. All this worrying was taking its toll on Louise, and she looked on the verge of having a breakdown. In fact, she hadn't been in her best for the last few months, and this new blow added up to her already frail appearance.
"I can't leave him," she said with unshakable conviction. "I know he wouldn't." Nothing anybody could say would make her leave his side. She needed to be there for him and show him that she still cared despite her behavior as of late.
Teaspoon shook his head, knowing how stubborn Lou could be. "You need to keep your strength if you want to help Kid, honey," the marshal insisted, but watching the set of her jaw, he knew that no words would convince her, so he tried something different. "What about if I brought you something up here? What do you say?"
Louise turned her head to him and nodding, she simply whispered, "Thank you."
Lou spent the rest of the afternoon watching over Kid continuously. She kept wiping his hot forehead and feeding him the medicine the doctor had left. So far there was not much improvement in his condition, and her heart sank with every single minute that passed without any notable change in him. Louise hadn't left his side except for the one time she went to check on the boys. Rachel had fixed them something to eat and later put them to bed. When Lou had gone, they were already sleeping like two little angels. After much insistence from her part, Rachel had reluctantly agreed to go home. There was no need for her to stay up when there was no saying when Kid would come about.
There were no words for Lou to express the deep gratefulness she felt for Rachel and Teaspoon, especially after the way she had treated them lately. Lou had to admit that their support in these moments was invaluable, and she'd have been so lost without them right now. She had tried to utter a clumsy apology for her past behavior, visibly embarrassed in the presence of her friend, but Rachel had reminded her that no regretful words were necessary in families. It was true, but Lou ruefully admitted that she had forgotten her priorities to her family for a long time. She had sincerely thought that she had been acting sensibly and followed her heart, but now she realized that she had been completely wrong. Her ears and her heart had shut down to everybody, and her eyes had been too blind to see what she would be losing in the long run.
Rachel had gone, promising to be back as soon as she finished work at school the following day. Teaspoon, though, had stayed with Lou since she hadn't been able to convince him to go home. The marshal had been adamant, and the two of them kept constant vigil over Kid. The evening turned into night and still there was no sign that he would wake up any time soon. His temperature had come down a bit, which brought some relief to Lou's troubled soul.
The house was in complete silence, and no sound came from outside. The rain had ceased a few hours ago but still the clouds hovered threateningly above, covering the moon and the stars in the sky. The night was pitch black and only a faint light burned inside the bedroom, casting shadows over the walls. Teaspoon sat in a rocking chair dozing. The day had been very trying for all of them, and it was no surprise that the marshal had succumbed to sleep. He was really getting old although he was unwilling to admit it and even got annoyed whenever anybody mentioned his age, Lou thought with a half-smile. However, she had to admit that she was grateful for his presence, asleep and all. Actually, she was glad that at least he could get some shuteye.
Louise, sitting on a chair by his side, couldn't just sleep, and all her heart and soul went out for the person lying in the bed a few meters away. She prayed and waited, waited and prayed for him to wake up soon. Once again she had to face an agonizing wait. It seemed that her life with Kid was made up of moments of intense waiting. Looking back on the years spent together she ruefully thought that her patience and endurance had been tried more than enough already. Since right from the beginning all she had done was to wait on him. Being of a distrustful nature she had waited for him to give away her well-kept secret, but he didn't. Then she waited for him to finally approach her with something more than friendly intentions. All those waits when he went missing or just on every ride he took during their Express days had been a torture more than once. Then it came the moment she waited for him to propose when she finally was ready to take that step. Later she had to wait for him to make up his mind about whether to go to the war, and when he finally went and all those years waiting for his uncertain return had been simply a living nightmare. It seemed that she still had to do some more waiting, and tonight it seemed to be harder than anything she had ever done.
The hours seemed endless, and her entire body was sore due to the long time spent in the same position. Her eyes stung after being fixed on Kid constantly and her neck was aching terribly. Finally, the sun greeted a brand new day and its first rays filtered through the window, falling over the marshal's sprawling figure on the rocking chair. He stirred sleepily and hearing some soft murmurs around him he opened the eyes. They immediately located the source of those murmurs. Louise was sitting on the edge of the bed next to Kid, whispering soft words and gently caressing his hair and face. Witnessing the sweet scene before his eyes, Teaspoon felt as if he was intruding on an intimate moment between husband and wife, which nobody should spy on. Clearing his throat to make his presence known he stood up and averted his gaze awkwardly. Louise turned her attention to the marshal and greeted him without much enthusiasm. "Good morning," she said while she stood up and approached the marshal.
"Any changes?" he asked even though he knew what her answer would be.
Louise shook her head ruefully. "Only thing is that his temperature has come down considerably."
"Well, that's good news, ain't it?" Teaspoon said, but Lou didn't say anything. He knew that she wouldn't be happy till Kid finally opened his eyes. The marshal could understand her mood, especially when he was sure that she hadn't got any sleep last night. "Honey, why don't you go and take a nap? I'll stay here with Kid."
"Teaspoon, I can't rest while my husband is like that. I just can't."
"At least eat something, for goodness' sake. Won't be very helpful if you make yourself sick," Teaspoon insisted, knowing full well that she hadn't eaten anything for many hours. Even yesterday when after much insistence Lou had accepted to be brought something to eat, she had basically nibbled at a thin slice of bread, which was far from saying she had really eaten.
Lou made a gesture of annoyance at Teaspoon's insistence about eating. Why couldn't he understand that she just felt unable to eat anything? She knew that the marshal wouldn't leave the matter alone, and after a moment's consideration she said, "I'll see if the boys are awake and I'll make breakfast for them."
"Us," Teaspoon corrected.
"For us," she repeated emphatically, feeling annoyed at the marshal's insistence. "Happy?"
"Very," he replied with a lopsided smile.
Louise looked at the marshal with a peeved expression but chose not to say anything. Turning around she grudgingly left the room and went to do as she had said. The boys were already awake when she appeared in the bedroom, both full of questions about Kid, and Lou patiently answered their curiosity as best as she could. Her nerves were on edge and today nothing seemed to calm her down, not even the boys' easy banter. Lou tried to keep busy and entertain her mind with other thoughts. She took her time fixing breakfast for the children while listening to their conversation, but however hard she tried she couldn't stop worrying about Kid. Likewise, she felt unable to eat a bite, which of course she skillfully didn't mention to Teaspoon when she took up some breakfast for him.
Later she hurriedly went to feed the horses and muck out the stables. The house could well be neglected, but the animals needed to be attended to without fail. Kid had worked so hard on those horses that she'd hate that all his efforts could go to waste because of her own carelessness. Looking around the stables she realized for the fist time that he had really made their dreams become a reality. She had been here dozens of times, but it was now that she came to understand how much she had missed. It was all thanks to Kid that they had the ranch going on because she couldn't have cared less.
Now Louise was beginning to face all her wrongs during the last months. It dawned on her that she had almost destroyed everything dear to her heart. She had never given Kid the opportunity to talk; she hadn't wanted to listen to anything he would say. Her reasons had seemed so sound at the time, and her pain had been so overwhelming that she had been blind and deaf to everything else. Like usual, she had pushed everybody away and wanted to suffer in loneliness. The pain was still inside her, very much alive, and she wasn't sure how she could deal with it, but now all her self was intent on having Kid back, nothing else.
Later that day the doctor arrived as he had promised. He checked on Kid, but there was no visible change in his condition much to Lou's chagrin. As she had already noticed for herself, the only good thing was that his fever had come down considerably and was almost gone. Her irritation mounted as Doctor McNeil answered her multiple queries and questions lightly without giving her a concrete explanation. To her ears it sounded as if the man was trying to hide something or simply mislead her. All she wanted to know was if Kid was gonna be all right, and the man's evasive words were really trying her nerves.
After changing Kid's bandages and checking everything else, the doctor bid them good-day and took his leave. Like the day before he insisted on walking out of the house on his own. Lou kept staring at his retreating figure with visible annoyance, and even when the door closed and she couldn't see him anymore, she kept staring ahead of her. She had a splitting headache after the sleepless night and her irritation was growing by the minute.
Teaspoon noticed her troubled expression and coming closer to her he asked, "What's wrong, Lou?" The doctor had clearly hinted that Kid was getting his strength and some of his color back, and he was on his way back to health, but Louise had just looked as if the doctor had broken the most terrible news. Teaspoon just couldn't understand what was going through her mind right now.
Lou looked up at him with bright eyes and whispered, "I dunno, Teaspoon. I'm so scared."
"Honey, you know Kid's gonna be all right," the marshal tried to reason with her.
"I know nothing! Nothing whatsoever!" she exclaimed indignantly, "and neither do you!"
"Lou…" he tried again, but she wasn't in the mood of listening to more empty words.
The tiredness, her splitting headache and the whole situation were taking their toll and her nerves were frayed after the long sleepless night. "He should be awake by now, Teaspoon! I'm no fool. Maybe he hit his head or something, and that idiot of a doctor is just too dumb to see anything even if it exploded straight in his face!"
Teaspoon placed his hands on her shoulders and said, trying his patience, "Lou, you gotta calm down."
"What if he never wakes up?" she asked loudly, her words directed more to herself than to the marshal.
"He will, he will," Teaspoon insisted, finding it increasingly difficult to appease the woman before him. He really wished Rachel were here; she sure was more used to dealing with Lou's weird moods than the marshal. Even though he had married on six occasions, he still had difficulties dealing with women in general.
Louise sighed wearily and muttered, "I can't lose him. He's all I got."
"Honey, you know you ain't alone."
His words ignited her fury and without thinking twice she pulled away forcefully and barged against the marshal loudly. "Ain't I, Teaspoon? Really? Who the hell are you talking about? Those so-called friends who hadn't cared to come and see us in years? Or maybe Rachel, who turned her back on me at the first opportunity?" She knew that she was unfair, but it seemed she was out of control. "Who, Teaspoon? You mean yourself, uh, you who almost got my husband killed?" As soon as the last words were out of her mouth she let out a yelp, regretting everything she had said in the heat of the moment. "Oh Teaspoon, I'm sorry, so sorry. I didn't mean it." She cried, watching the marshal's cold expression. "I don't know what came over me. Please…"
Louise couldn't finish her words as suddenly they both heard a groan coming from the other side of the room. "Kid!" she cried, and both of them dashed to the side of the bed. His eyes were still shut, but his head was swinging from side to side with slow movements. His eyes fluttered briefly, and suddenly they opened, but seemed unable to focus. Kid kept blindly looking at the ceiling; his vision was still blurred, and little by little the images became clearer and clearer, and the first thing he saw was Teaspoon's smiling face looking down at him.
"How are you feeling, son?" the marshal asked.
Pain from his lower abdomen coursed all over Kid, and for the first time realization of what had happened hit him. "I've seen better days," he muttered through gritted teeth.
Teaspoon smiled placidly and turning behind him where Lou had stayed out of Kid's angle of vision he said, "I'll try to catch up with Doctor McNeil. Don't think he's gone yet."
Louise nodded silently, and the marshal turned to leave the bedroom. The door clicked shut, and Lou came closer to the bed. Both she and Kid kept staring at each other for a few minutes without saying a word. Her heart seemed to jump in joy watching her husband on his way to recuperation. "Can I get you some water, Kid?" she finally managed to ask but he shook his head no. His eyes looked at her with a serious and grave shine. "I've been so worried," she whispered, full of the emotion she was feeling, but to her dismay his reaction wasn't the one she was expecting.
"Yeah, sure," Kid muttered sarcastically, his voice sounding cold and detached. Closing his eyes he swung his head toward the other side of the bed as if he couldn't bear the vision of Louise before him.
This gesture of his hit her heart hard, experiencing in her soul the many times she had shown him similar unkindness and almost despite. She was having a taste of her own medicine in that tiny gesture, and deep inside Lou ruefully recognized that she rightly deserved his scorn. Watching his eyes still shut as if to close himself to her, Louise felt a wail escape her lips, and she staggered a few steps away from the bed. Tears began trickling down her face and sobs burst suddenly. Her feet seemed to have lost their ability, and she almost fell down and hit her body against the window frame.
It was too much for Kid to watch her before him as a reminder of all those difficult months and her resolution to break free from him forever. He was so angry with her for what she was doing to their marriage that he couldn't even look at her. With his eyes closed he heard her racking sobs and her feet shuffling across the room raucously. He opened his eyes suddenly and strained his head to spot her, but all he could see was her trembling shadow projected over the bed. Apart from the searing pain spreading all over his body, he was still very weak and the slightest movement meant a considerable effort.
"Lou!" he called several times, but Louise just kept repeating "I'm so sorry" over and over again like a mantra while she sobbed uncontrollably. "Please Lou, don't cry," he tried. "You know what it does to me." At his words he could hear that her sobs calmed down a bit. "Please listen to me, Lou." He breathed in deeply and kept his gaze to the ceiling. All he could hear was her sniffing and knew that he had her complete attention. "All I've ever wanted is you, Lou, almost from the first moment. In that rundown hut, remember? Then and there I knew you were the woman I wanted, the only woman for me." He stopped briefly to catch his breath and gather some strength. His voice sounded very weak, but it was important for him to say what was on his mind and heart. "It scared me to death to think that you didn't feel the same way I did, and you know it took me ages to have the guts to do something. I was so clumsy and stupid. You can't imagine what a happy man you made of me when we were finally together. I just couldn't believe my good luck, but…" he paused for a second, his face contorted in a bitter gesture, "I busted it, and I cursed my foolishness. I lost you for my stupid clumsiness, and I really thought that you'd walked out of my life forever. Those were some of the bitterest months in my whole life, and today I can't thank heaven enough for letting me have you back and make you my wife."
Kid stopped for a moment. The room was in complete silence, and he could see her shadow in the window, but he couldn't tell from her posture what she might be thinking. "Don't you realize that you mean the world to me, Lou? You're my whole family and the only person I can actually call family. You're my wife, and I will be happy and proud as long as we stick together. Lou, I…" The words got stuck in his throat and he just added wryly, "Never mind."
With a bitter countenance he sighed deeply and closed his eyes once again in powerlessness. However, as soon as he shut them he opened them again suddenly as he heard her light steps in the silent room. Louise appeared before him; her face smeared with dry tears. They kept staring at each other in silence. His tired blue eyes locked in her big brown ones hungrily and longingly. Suddenly and without warning, Lou fell to her knees heavily, and the next thing Kid felt was her lips pressed against his, kissing him deeply. Once over the unexpected turn of events, Kid kissed her back as passionately as his condition let him. In that moment everything seemed to vanish around them. The pain in his side didn't seem to hurt as much, and he felt somehow invigorated; even those months of loneliness and despair had become a distant memory with a single gesture.
A knock resounded in the bedroom, and as suddenly as her lips had met his, Louise pulled away and was on her feet in no time. "Must be the doctor," she said and before Kid had the chance to say anything, Lou had crossed the room and opened the door for Teaspoon and Doctor McNeil. Both men approached the bed, followed by Louise behind them, walking with slow steps. "How are we doing today?" the doctor asked.
"I don't know about you, Doc. I feel great," Kid said with a husky voice, still a bit shaken after that ardent kiss.
"Painful, uh?" Doctor McNeil added and Kid simply nodded with a grimace. Opening his bag the doctor took out a small bottle. "I'll give you some laudanum. It will ease the pain and help you to sleep."
"I'm not taking that," Kid protested. "I don't want to sleep." He needed to stay awake and be able to talk to Lou, hoping that kiss meant that they were going to be fine after all.
"You'll do what the doctor says, Kid," Lou said firmly, casting him a stern look, which clearly expressed that he had no say in the matter. Kid had to smile at her light scolding, and next to him the doctor muttered, "I'd do what your lovely wife says, son. My experience tells me that we mustn't contradict our women if we value our life."
"Don't I know it!" the Southerner exclaimed jokingly, and the two other men in the room laughed heartily at this comment while Lou shook her head.
"Stop moaning, Kid," she ordered mildly and helped the doctor to give the laudanum to her husband.
"Very well, son, I'll leave you to rest," Doctor McNeil explained. "I'll talk to your local doctor and see if he can check on you. I'm not really sure how much longer my unit will stay in Rock Creek now that the band has been caught."
Kid nodded and at the mention of Doctor Logan, Lou made a gesture of disgust but didn't say a word. Doctor McNeil bid Kid good-bye, and he and Teaspoon filed out of the bedroom. Lou turned to follow the two men when she felt a tug behind her. Looking down she saw Kid's hand taking hold of her skirt and stopping her movements. "Where you going?" he asked, urgency in his voice.
Louise smiled sweetly. "I'm just going to show the doctor out. You have your rest."
"I don't intend to sleep, Lou," he stated stubbornly and she shook her head with a placid smile on her face.
"All right. As you wish. I won't be long," she said and turned to leave. When she was at the door, she heard Kid call her name. Louise turned around and cast him a questioning look. He looked back at her and said, "No more tears, all right?" She lowered her eyes and without a single word she nodded and scurried out of the room.
Kid heard the door click shut and kept listening to her light steps fading along the corridor. The pain in his side seemed to lessen a bit. His eyelids felt heavy, but he fought the urge to give in to sleep. "I'll just close my eyes for a few minutes till Lou comes back," he muttered to himself, feeling more and more tired by the minute. The kiss he had shared with his wife kept playing in his mind and with those images and a happy heart he finally drifted back to sleep.
When Kid opened his eyes again, the room was in complete darkness except for a single faint light flickering across him. He turned his head in the direction of the lamp and saw his wife sitting on the rocking chair at a few meters away from the bed; her legs folded in a close embrace against her chest and her head rested on her knees. Her eyes were open, directed at some indefinite point ahead of her. Kid studied her from his position in the bed. She looked clearly tired, and there were rings around her eyes. Despite everything, Kid thought that she was beautiful like always.
"Lou?" he called softly not wanting to startle her.
She lifted her head and seeing him awake Louise smiled widely. "Hey!" she exclaimed, approaching the bed dragging the chair along.
"What time is it?" Kid asked, still a bit disconcerted after the long sleep.
"Dunno. Three in the morning, I guess," she answered without averting her eyes from him for one single second.
"And what are you doing up at this time?" he asked with a serious expression.
Instead of answering his question, Louise asked one of her own, "Can I get you something, Kid? Some water or something to eat?"
"I want you to get into bed now, Lou," he insisted in earnest.
"I can't sleep," she said lightly as she tucked the sheets carefully around him.
"Get in bed, Lou, for goodness' sake, or I'll make you. I mean it," he continued stubbornly and lifted his head as if he were going to get up and drag her to bed with him.
"All right, all right," Lou exclaimed, fearfully watching his intentions. "Quit that right now, or you'll end up hurting yourself." She rounded the bed, grunting through her teeth, and after discarding her dressing gown she got under the covers. "Happy?" she asked sarcastically.
"Come closer," Kid whispered and stretching his arm he wrapped it round her waist and brought her closer to him. Lou snuggled against him carefully and felt his heat on her skin. "That's so much better," he whispered, and Louise smiled coyly.
They stayed holding each other in silence, relishing in the solace each brought to the other. It had been so long since they had been like this that neither dared to break the magic of the moment. Finally, Kid softly asked, "How are you, Lou?" She looked fixedly in his eyes in the darkness and the Southerner added, "Are we gonna be all right now?"
"I don't know," she admitted truthfully with a husky voice. It would be very easy to answer that everything was gonna be fine, but Lou just wasn't sure. Right now all she cared about was to forget about that crazy idea of hers about the divorce and especially those long cold months. She couldn't tell how she was feeling for sure. Her intentions and wishes were clear to her heart, but there was no saying how she could act. Barely a few hours ago she had snapped at Teaspoon and barged against him with the cruelest words. Later she had apologized to him truthfully, and the marshal had been as understanding as he always was. Lou couldn't assure that her swinging mood wouldn't make its appearance again, and that was why her answer to Kid was cautious and hesitant.
"Lou, talk to me, please," the Southerner said after the long silence, "It's just me. Kid. Please."
Louise gulped nervously and whispered with a cracked voice, "I've been so angry. Angry with everything and everybody. Angry with that Doctor Logan, with Sally and her stupid husband, with Rachel, Teaspoon, with every single living soul under the sun, with God, and with …"
"Me," Kid finished the sentence for her.
Lou looked at him with big eyes. "Yes, with you," she admitted with a very thin voice. Breathing in deeply she continued, "It just ain't fair, Kid. What the hell have I done to deserve nothing but bad luck? As far as I remember, all I've done in this damn life has been struggle to survive. A horrible childhood with no ma, an estranged father, a lonely existence at an orphanage. And I don't need to explain to you how horrendous my early youth was." Long ago she swore that she wouldn't mention the man who stole her innocence and trust, and she didn't want to bring him between Kid and her in this moment. Her voice was shaky and she continued with the same tone, "Why couldn't life let me have something, just something that any woman can have? Why not me? I never asked for anything, and still I have nothing, and all I get is blow after blow, and I'm damn tired."
Noticing that she was getting too upset and almost on the verge of tears Kid tried to distract her attention somehow. As he had already told her, he didn't want her to pour any more tears. They have already had more than enough, and he swore that he'd try all his efforts to bring her peace and reasons to laugh as she used to. "I don't know, Lou. Not everything is bad," he began half-jokingly, "After all, you have a wonderful husband. That's something, ain't it?"
Louise giggled at his words, understanding what he was trying to do, and she felt less tense. Stroking his face tenderly she added, "You're right. The best husband ever."
On feeling her caresses Kid smiled happily. "No, Lou," he said, this time seriously. "I'm nothing special, just the man who loves you."
"Then I'm just the woman who loves you, who always did and always will," she whispered in his ear, feeling that she needed him to know that her feelings for him had always been there despite all the problems coming between them.
Kid smiled widely at her words, suddenly feeling like the luckiest man on earth. He tightened his hold on her waist and brought her closer to him as if he would never let go. They stayed in silence for several minutes; his senses relishing in her close proximity. "Just let me help you, Lou," he finally muttered against her hair. "You don't have to do this alone. I'm here and we'll manage to do everything if we are together. We'll do whatever you want, anything, but let me help you please." He waited for her answer but she didn't say anything. "Lou?" he called and in that moment he noticed her deep breathing on his naked shoulder and looking down he realized that she had finally fallen asleep. He smiled in the darkness and planting a soft kiss on her forehead he closed his eyes himself, knowing that today he would have the best rest he had had in months.