Chapter 18
The following day Lou was up and about very early in the morning. She had been able to grasp a few hours sleep the night before, which had really felt good to her body after many sleepless nights. It was evident that Kid was getting stronger and better as the hours passed. When she woke up this morning, he was still asleep and she hadn't wanted to disturb his sleep. He needed all the rest he could get, and she swore to herself that she'd do everything to see to it that he was well taken care of.
The conversation they had the night before had left her lighthearted. However, she was still feeling a bit strange when she mulled over the last few months. Thinking about the fact that had triggered all those changes in her, Lou couldn't help but hurt. The pain hadn't gone, and she was sure that somehow it would always remain in her heart. It was something that she couldn't say she had completely accepted. Her reality was very hard, and she knew it would take her longer to finally come to terms with the lacks in her life. However, she had finally understood that she didn't need to go through everything on her own. Kid was there for her, had always been, and she had to learn to trust him and accept his support. Louise truly wanted to let him help her, but she still felt scared. Sometimes her own reactions were out of her control, and it frightened her to think that she couldn't come back to the way she and Kid used to be. Her heart was willing to fight for their love and marriage. She felt that they had been granted a second chance, and she would do her best to definitely make it work. Louise had to learn painfully what was important in her life. She had almost lost Kid and the thought made her shudder.
Since waking up that morning, Lou had been busy. After taking care of the chores around the ranch, she had done some cleaning in the house. It really needed some tidying up after those days where she had been unable to do anything. Now that Kid was better, she could spend some time taking care of the house while he was sleeping in the bedroom. Hearing the pattering of feet above, she knew that the two boys were awake. Thinking about them put a smile on her mouth and feeling cheerful and very much alive she climbed the stairs towards the bedroom where the boys were. Since the day Kid had been brought home after being wounded, the two children had spent their nights in Jeremiah's old room, the very bedroom that Kid had occupied for the last months. Rachel had told her that both boys had been adamant about sleeping together, and they hadn't even wanted to consider using Theresa's room. However illogical their reasons were, they had preferred to spend the night uncomfortably squeezed in that single bed than sleeping apart.
As Lou opened the door to the bedroom, laughter first reached her ears and peeking inside, she saw the two brothers, still in their night clothes, jumping and bouncing on top of the bed. She knew that she should scold them, but the image welcoming her was simply a sight for sore eyes. From the threshold Louise kept transfixed, staring at their games with a wide smile. How could she interrupt their happy playtime with her adult logic? They had a right to enjoy their childhood in their innocent games and be saved from the misery that life was full of. Louise didn't know a lot about the two boys but it broke her heart to think that these two loving children were spending the sweet days of their childhood in an orphanage. Although life hadn't really been terrible for Louise at the orphanage, what had really been painful to her was the realization of being alone in the world.
Lou remembered those years growing up within those four walls without much love. She hadn't been as young as her siblings and perfectly understood the situation they were in. As the years had gone by, Louise had grown aware of their precarious situation at the orphanage. What would happen when she were too old to stay there? Would the nuns send her away? One thing was sure; she would have to part from her sibling, and there was no saying if they would ever be together again. For that reason she had decided to get away, and with a heavy heart she had left her dear sister and brother behind. Long ago Lou had promised her ma that she would take care of her siblings, and with that promise on her mind, she had set off to find a new life for the three of them. Naively she had thought that they could be together in a short time, but years passed before she was able to fulfill her promise.
No, it hadn't been easy. Louise wondered what life had in store for the two children playing before her eyes. They were young but no fools to realize that they weren't like the other kids with parents who could provide for them. Lou knew little about the boys' story but for small snippets from their talks together. As far as she knew, their mother had died in childbirth, and apparently their father had abandoned them not long afterwards. Life was sometimes a big joke. These boys' life was almost identical to what she and Kid had lived in their childhoods. Maybe that was the reason why she felt so connected to them in such a short time. They had really been a breath of cool air when she had seen no light on the days following Kid's being shot.
In one of the jumps little Tommy almost took a fall from the bed, but Lou ran and caught him in mid-air. On seeing her appear, Jack stopped instantly and looked at her with a troubled countenance as if he had been caught red-handed. "Having fun so early in the morning?" Lou asked with a smile, Tommy still in her hold. Jack kept his eyes downcast and didn't say anything. "I imagine Mrs. Burrows wouldn't have let you do something like this, uh?" Jack shook his head and grinned slyly. "Now quit it before you or your brother get hurt, all right?" she said.
"Yes, Ma'am," the boy answered with a serious expression. Louise put Tommy back on the floor, and Jack asked, "How's Mr. McCloud?"
At the mention of Kid, she had to smile sweetly and said, "He's much better, honey."
"Can we see him?" Tommy asked.
"Not now, sweetheart. He's resting," Lou answered and watching the disappointed faces of the two boys, she added, "But I'll tell you what. When he wakes up, we'll pay him a visit, all right?" The two boys nodded their heads in unison, smiling widely. "Now wash up and get dressed while I fix breakfast, all right?" She turned to leave and when she was at the door, she swung around and looked at the boys again with a twinkle in her eyes. "Don't forget to scrub behind your ears too. I'll check later, uh?" she said with a wink and left.
About half an hour later the two boys entered the kitchen were Lou stood next to the stove finishing breakfast. Hearing steps behind her, she turned to see the two boys and smiled broadly. Louise came closer to them and smoothing Tommy's turned-up shirt collar, she said, "Have a seat, boys. Breakfast is ready." The two children sat down at the kitchen table while Louise poured a couple of glasses of milk for them.
"Pancakes!" Jack exclaimed as he laid eyes on the platter that Lou had prepared.
"You like them, uh?" Lou replied, amused at the boy's reaction.
"Oh yeah, we love them, don't we, Tommy?" the boy said and his brother next to him nodded enthusiastically.
"Don't talk with your mouth full, honey," Lou scolded lightly, trying to stifle a giggle.
"Yes, Ma'am," Jack muttered half-heartedly; all his attention focused on gobbling down the pile of pancakes on his plate.
"I thought I could get you a little treat for being such good boys this week," Lou explained truthfully while she sat down next to the two brothers. The two children had surprisingly been on their best behavior inside the house for two whole days without protest while Kid had been in critical condition, so Lou had believed that they deserved some kind of reward. "Besides, today's Friday, almost the end of the week, and we really could do with something good after a hard couple of days," she added while she poured herself a cup of steaming coffee.
"Is Mr. Ferguson coming tomorrow?" Jack wanted to know.
"Who?" Lou asked with a frown.
"Mr. Ferguson," the boy repeated matter-of-factly as if Lou should know all along who that man was. "He's from the orphanage."
"Mrs. Burrows said he'd be coming on Saturday," Tommy finished for his brother.
"Oh," Lou let out awkwardly, suddenly realizing that the boys would be going soon. With the last worries on her mind she hadn't given any thought to the fact that the children were expected to leave for the orphanage in just a day. She didn't know why, but all of a sudden, her cheerful mood vanished and she felt very sad.
"Is he coming, Mrs. McCloud?" Jack insisted when Lou didn't answer his question.
Louise looked at the boy with tired eyes and muttered very softly, "I guess." The two boys didn't seem very upset about leaving, but Lou imagined that for them the orphanage was their home, the only home they knew, and nothing else.
Noticing the sudden change in her, Tommy stared at Lou with big eyes and placed his little hand over hers. She turned her head to the boy, and his tender gesture made her grin sheepishly. Ruffling the young child's hair she stood up and said, "Finish your breakfast, and then you can go and play."
Later in the day the house became a continuous flow of people coming to see or inquire after Kid's health. The first one who made his appearance was the doctor, coming to check the blue-eyed rancher's wound. Doctor McNeil confirmed that Kid continued getting better rapidly, lifting Lou's spirits greatly. He also brought even better news to her ears. Apparently, Doctor Logan was out of town at the moment or at least, that was what his wife had told the army doctor. So Doctor McNeil would continue checking Kid's progress till he was completely back to normal. The man had requested a special leave from his unit as a favor and luckily it had been granted. As the doctor told her and Kid his good news, Louise almost jumped in joy. She knew that she had no logical reasons for her aversion to Doctor Logan, but she couldn't help but dislike the town physician. Somehow there was something in him that made her distrust him and Lou felt more reassured, knowing that Doctor McNeil would be the one caring for Kid. Besides, having to see Doctor Logan would have been a painful reminder of what had happened in that surgery of his long months ago. Lou knew she had to work hard on overcoming and face those memories, but for the moment she'd rather not have such a vivid reminder before her eyes so soon.
Captain Graham also called on them to enquire after Kid. The army officer had explained to the couple that the band of outlaws they had been after for months had been caught and were in the law's hands now. Some of his men had been killed in the shooting, but Mrs. Spencer was perfectly well after the fright in her own home. The man expressed his gratefulness for Kid's invaluable help, and Lou couldn't feel prouder of her husband than right now.
Later in the day Teaspoon and Rachel had come as well. Kid had pleasantly surprised her when he had resigned as Teaspoon's deputy. Lou had never wanted him to work for the marshal because, although Kid had tried to tell her otherwise, she knew that he'd be in the middle of trouble. To her own chagrin, Lou had proved to be right and he had almost lost his life. For that reason his resignation was the best gift he could give her. She was sick and tired of worrying all the time; all she wanted was a quiet life for the two of them. Kid was right; it was high time they enjoyed some peacefulness and forget tears. They had had enough as it was. Lou acknowledged that she had cried more in these few months than in her whole life despite the problems she had to face in the past. Louise had never been a big crier, but something had broken inside her and it seemed as the floods had opened and flown free. She intended to keep her promise to Kid and stop her tears. Now that he wouldn't be working as a deputy marshal, she would have one less worry. After all, with the ranch working as it was at the present they would have more than enough to live on.
After Teaspoon and Rachel had gone, two other deputies arrived to visit and even Tompkins had called on them. The storekeeper had come full of apologies for his behavior with Louise and the young boy at his store a few days ago. The man had even brought a basket full of goodies as a token of good-will. Louise had accepted his apologies reluctantly as she was still sore for the treatment she had received from Tompkins. It was Kid who had interceded, and she had finally relented.
Louise closed the bedroom door behind her and stepped inside. As soon as Kid saw her, his face lightened up and she smiled back. Lou approached the bed slowly without taking her eyes off him once. "Is everybody gone now?" Kid asked from the bed; his back propped against the pillows.
Louise simply nodded and when he made a gesture of relief at her silent answer, she asked, "You tired?" She reached the bed and took the hand which Kid stretched to her.
"No," Kid answered, bringing her hand to his mouth and kissing it tenderly, "but I already missed being only with my wife."
Louise smiled happily and sat on the bed opposite him carefully. She leaned over and kissed him on the lips softly. Pulling away slightly Louise looked in his eyes fixedly and whispered in his ear, "Ready for another visit?"
"Lou, no!" Kid protested vehemently, disappointment gripping him at the prospect of being with his wife. He just wanted to make up for all those terrible months now that she seemed ready to overcome their past problems. Today they hadn't had a single moment to be together, and Kid just needed to talk, laugh or share some kisses with her. "Who now, Lou?" he asked with a moaning voice. "Tell whoever it is I'm sleeping and send them away."
Louise giggled and stood up from the bed. "Stop all that whining, Kid," she said while heading towards the door. "I assure you that you'll be glad for this one." She opened the door and made a gesture with her hand to whoever was on the other side to come in. Suddenly, pattering feet were heard, and the two boys dashed into the room. On seeing them, Kid smiled widely as the two children bumped into the bed raucously. "Be careful," Lou scolded as she approached them.
"Hey there!" Kid greeted, chuckling as the two children kept pushing each other to be the one closer to him. "I hope you've been good boys."
"They've been as good as gold," Lou said as she sat down on the bed and immediately, Tommy strained to climb onto her. The boy, now perched on her lap, stretched his arm holding a folded paper towards Kid.
"What's this? He asked, taking the paper from the boy and unfolding it.
""We made a picture of Katy," Jack piped in. "That way you won't miss her here so much."
"Why, thank you, boys," Kid replied with a smile.
"And we gave her some carrots to eat!" Jack continued in an exciting voice.
"And water!" Tommy added after his brother.
"Seems I have no reason to worry as you're taking such good care of her," Kid said, ruffling the older boy's hair, and the two children beamed proudly at his words. "Now then, has my other girl behaved as well?" he asked, exchanging a teasing look with Lou.
"What other girl?" Jack furrowed his brow confused.
"My wife, of course." Kid replied, chuckling bemusedly. "How's she been?"
"Not too bad," Tommy answered with an ample smile.
"Not too bad? Not too bad?" Louise exclaimed in feigned annoyance, tickling the young boy on his sides, which left him in giggles. The four of them laughed and at some point Kid grabbed his side with a grimace, feeling the pain shoot up.
"You all right?" Lou asked, noticing his pained expression. Kid nodded and added, "Fine. Just feeling sore with all this laughing."
Louise turned to the two brothers and said, "Boys, why don't you go and play outside? It's a lovely day, and Kid needs to rest for a while, all right?"
The two boys nodded in agreement, and as swiftly as they had stepped in the room minutes before they scurried out of it, slamming the door shut behind them. Lou stared after them with a melancholic expression and noticing her sad eyes, Kid stroked her thigh over the material of her skirt and called, "Lou?" She turned to him questioningly, and he asked, "What's wrong?"
Clutching his hand in hers, Lou lowered her gazed to their intertwined hands. "Tomorrow that fella from the orphanage is coming to take them back there."
"I know," Kid simply said.
They stayed silent for a few minutes, and after a while Lou dared a look in his direction. "Kid?" He stared at her, a question in his eyes, and Lou took her time to continue, choosing the words carefully. "Uh… I was wondering … uh … Couldn't they stay a bit longer?"
Kid furrowed his brow and asked, "How much longer?"
She gazed at his eyes fixedly and replied with a soft voice, "What about till they find a nice girl and get married?"
It took him a few seconds to register the meaning of her words. "Are you saying what I think you're saying, Lou?"
"I want them to be part of our family, part of us," Lou explained, carefully watching his reaction.
"What about not wanting a quick fix?" Kid reminded her. They had just begun sorting their problems out, and he just didn't want to rush into something they weren't ready for yet.
"That's just it, Kid," Lou insisted vehemently. "It wouldn't be one pitiful and desperate attempt to fill a vacuum at all costs. They're already in here," she added, tapping her hand on her bosom.
"Have you thought this through, Lou?"
"Not really," she admitted. "I just know that I want them to stay with us. Please Kid."
"You know it won't be like taking care of a new born baby. We'll have to pick up where others began. It won't be easy," Kid continued, trying to make her see what they would get themselves into. He had been surprised by her suggestion and wanted to give in. After all, the idea had been lurking in his mind for a while, but he needed to voice his doubts as well.
Louise sighed wearily and lowering her gaze from him, she whispered sadly, "You don't think I can do it."
"No! Of course not," Kid hurried to reassure her. That had never crossed his mind. He knew that Lou could be a good mother if they were given the opportunity. "I didn't mean it like that. Honestly. I just want you to be sure about it."
Lou smiled sweetly at his words and said, "I am."
"Well, then it's decided, I imagine," he stated, bringing her hand to his mouth and kissing it tenderly.
"You happy with that?" she asked tentatively, fearing that she had been a bit too rash in her judgment. She had thought that Kid seemed as taken by the two boys as she was, but if he had any doubts about it, she'd rather forget about the whole thing. Louise had learned her lesson the hard way, and now she understood that this marriage worked both ways. She knew she wouldn't be able to do anything without Kid because he was part of her very soul.
"Yeah, of course I am," Kid said. "You just caught me by surprise, but I have the same feelings for these boys as you."
Louise beamed happily and threw herself to his arms, hugging him as tightly as his condition let her. "Oh Kid, I love you so much," she exclaimed, kissing his soft lips softly.
Kid snickered as he held her in a tight embrace. "Let's hope the boys will be as willing," he muttered to himself thinking back about their remarks about Mrs. Burrows when she had wanted to adopt them. They didn't seem to warm to the idea at all, and Kid hoped that their reaction had to do more with their dislike for the lady than with the idea in itself. Lou seemed very excited, and Kid hoped that she wouldn't have a disappointment. He knew that if the boys didn't welcome the suggestion, neither he nor Lou would have the heart to make them unwillingly.
A couple of hours later there was a knock on the bedroom door, and it opened straightaway. Louise had let Kid rest for a while after the busy morning of visits they had had. She had prepared some lunch, and later she had asked the boys to accompany her to the bedroom where Kid lay. Opening the door slowly Lou walked inside, steering the two boys along by their hands. Kid grinned as soon as he laid eyes on them, and she shared a meaningful look with her husband. Louise made the boys sit in the chairs placed opposite Kid while she sat on the bed. The two children silently stared at them in expectation whereas Kid cleared his throat several times before he talked up, trying to find the right words. "Well, boys," he began awkwardly, "We… I mean, Lou and I would like to propose a little something."
"What thing?" Jack asked intrigued.
"Well,… uh … work around the ranch is getting more and more hectic, and probably I'll have to go away from time to time," he explained patiently. "That means that Lou'd be on her own a lot, so I'd feel better knowing that somebody was here to keep an eye on her." He stopped for a moment, letting out his breath nervously and casting a look at Lou he saw her nod in approval. "We thought," Kid continued after a few seconds, "that as you're not really, really happy with living at the orphanage, you could... stay here with me and Lou permanently. That is, if you want to." He looked at the children, expecting a reaction, but they remained silent.
"So what do you think, boys?" Lou piped in, unable to keep quiet any longer.
"You mean like adopting us?" Jack asked with a frown.
"Call it whatever you like," Kid explained. "This can be your home if you want. You can always go back to the orphanage if you're not happy here."
Jack kept thoughtful for a moment, and then he asked, "Would we have to change our names?"
"Course not," Kid answered promptly.
"Would we have to call you father and mother?" the boy asked again, not sure if he'd like this arrangement.
"Only if you want to," Kid said sincerely. "You can call us whatever you like."
"But we'd have to find something better than Mr. and Mrs. McCloud," Lou added with a wink.
"Like what?" Jack insisted.
"Why don't you try Kid and Lou? That's what all our friends call us," she offered and Jack nodded seriously. The two boys kept quiet, casting each other furtive calls. The silence was killing Louise, and she began wringing her hands nervously. The younger child was staring at her with a serious expression. "What do you say, Tommy boy?" she asked, squeezing the boy's little hand in hers. He kept thoughtful for a few minutes and his countenance turned into a troubled expression little by little. Noticing this, Lou hurried to ask again, "Don't you like it here, honey?"
The younger boy nodded exaggeratedly. "Very much, but I don't like sleeping with Jack. He kicks me all the time," Tommy said with pouting lips.
His answer sent the two adults into giggles. "Don't worry about that. We'll see to it that you each have your own bed," Kid added with a wide smile and turning his attention back to Jack, he asked, "So what you say, Jack? Is it yes or no?"
The boy kept a serious expression while he looked at the couple before him. Lou felt her heart beating wildly and her feet began pattering the floor nervously. The boy lifted his gaze to them and his serious countenance changed into a smiling one as he said, "Yes!" Lou jumped from the bed and drawing the two boys into her hold she began to laugh, foreseeing a spotless future ahead of them.