Chapter 10: Confrontation on the Tower

Lauren Mapstone watched in astonishment as Karigan swept up the aisle towards the King and Queen, her face set with determination as she bowed formally. Lauren knew why Karigan was here, she was going to tell Zachary about the plan to ride against the massing forest across the wall. It did not surprise Lauren that Karigan had chosen to wear the formal attire of the Green Riders for this important meeting.

She watched as Karigan pulled off her best aristocratic congratulations to the royal couple and gave them her thanks for inviting her to the wedding. She felt pride bubbling inside her as the younger rider exchange pleasantries hiding her emotions better than both Zachary and Estora. She could see the concern and jealousy fighting to control the Queens visage while Zachary's intense gaze never left his rider.

Karigan's first surprise came as the reply to Estora's question. She knew that the Queen had been planning to invite her formally in front of Zachary but she had not been expecting the question to be thrown in so early where there would be a chance for the King to digest the information.

"Will you be attending the festivities on the solstice Rider Sir G'ladheon?" Estora asked.

Karigan bowed again. "I would be delighted to do so your Majesty, I may need to retire early with your blessing of course."

Karigan's gaze flickered on the Captain who almost nodded in approval.

"You are still recovering from the mission in to Blackveil. I understand that you must also be grieving the loss of your friend, it is an honour that you will be able attend."

"There is something I must report to your Highnesses." Karigan noted the look of surprise on the Captains face why had everyone expected her to get Zachary alone when he ruled alone no longer.

"Yes?" This time it was Zachary who spoke.

She steeled herself for what was to come before launching in to the speech she had prepared in the time that it has taken her to clean herself up.

"The solstice will be the eve before I ride in to battle in Blackveil. I have asked no one to accompany but I cannot stop those that wish to from riding with me, we will ride at dawn before the castle awakes after the celebrations. I will lead the party along the North Road to the breach in the wall and from there in to Blackveil."

Karigan watched as the Captain moved from behind the King and rested her hand on her shoulder.

"Well done," Lauren murmured.

Karigan nodded her eyes never once leaving the Kings face as she bowed deeply. She knew it would be a while before he could process this without Estora beside him. Stealing a glance at the horror on Estora's face Karigan took a deep breath.

"I will not be moved on this point. Alone or accompanied I will ride to Blackveil in four days time even if your Highnesses forbid it." Karigan concluded.

"Are you trying to get yourself killed?" Estora seemed surprised that she had spoken.

"No I am just trying to do what it best for Sacoridia. Mornhavon must be defeated and I am the one he seeks, majesty."

"It is suicide to enter Blackveil from what you have written in your report." Estora insisted.

"My life for Mornhavon's is a price I would pay gladly to save Sacoridia."

Karigan swept from the room before the Queen could condemn her plan any further, and before Zachary could follow her. She let her feet lead her up to the roof to wait for the hardest part of the explaining, she trusted the Captain to get through to Estora, but Zachary would be hers to justify the madness to.

She looked out towards the North Road knowing that soon it would all be over. Even if she survived she may still have to see Zachary and Estora growing closer together but she would not dwell upon it for there was very little chance to her escaping the coming battle with her life. If she came back she would sort it out then.

Her gaze shifted to the astronomy tower. Inside lay the gift that Zachary had once given to her, the token of his affection. She thought back to that faithful night. "I hope that there is a place for faith and dreams. And I need you to know how I feel about you, Karigan... do know that it will always be here waiting for you." Those words still reverberated through her being; she could see him looking at her intently in her mind's eye. Is it still waiting for me? She wondered. Nothing has changed between us, he is still King and Estora still lies between us.

Curiosity got the better of her and she slipped in to the observatory knowing that the Weapons patrolling the roof would not disturb her. Sure enough a small chest stood against one of the curved walls. He meant it literally when he said it would always be here. With trembling fingers she lifted the coffer on to a small table at the side of the observatory; she did not dare do anything but stare at it for a long time until she reasoned that it was a gift to her after all.

Time seemed to stand still as she opened the coffer and looked in at the sliver objects still nestled in the deep purple velvet. She felt like the first time she had discovered them on her washstand again, like a young woman, except this time the feeling could not rid Blackveil from the back of her mind. She knew she should shut the coffer and put it back where she had found it before Zachary found her but she could not. She knew if she was ever going to find peace she must first accept his feelings for her.

What does he see? She wondered as she looked in to the mirror. Does he see a young woman or a seasoned green rider? Now was not the time to be vain. She shook herself as she heard footsteps approach, it was too late to hide the coffer now.

Karigan smiled wearily at her monarch before gesturing to the open coffer. "A lot has changed since that night three years ago, I was curious to see if this had also changed."

Zachary looked surprised by the turn of events, no doubt he had been expecting her to be full of fire and resistance to him. He turned to look at the gift he had once bestowed upon her.

"It will always be here waiting for you Karigan."

She smiled. "Perhaps, but maybe one day it will find a better home."

"It was a gift for you." He insisted. "It will never belong to Estora."

"I was not meaning Estora."

She met his intense gaze and sighed. "I am leaving to Blackveil soon, and I need you to know how I feel about you. You have already read my letter explaining my thoughts and dreams, or so I have been led to believe."

Zachary nodded.

"Zachary, I..." She started but her will crumbled.

She had been doing so well to hold herself together until now, but face with Zachary alone on the roof she could not continue. She was not an aristocrat no matter how hard she tried she would have never been able to keep her mask up. He smiled encouragingly at her, his hand tracing the contours of her face. She leant in to his touch.

"I have always known deep down that you would ride to face Mornhavon, I cannot stop you from going I know you too well." He sighed, "Why can I not protect the woman I love."

"Because the woman you love is a magnet for trouble." She tried to joke but it fell flat.

She felt his arms around her pulling her close. She did not fight him this time knowing that whatever she did now could not make their situation any worse. He knew her true feelings just as she knew his. Her life had already been threatened by the feelings the King was unaware of, he was married to another woman and yet by going against her head she felt peace settle on her heart. They may not be able to change the world but whatever happened they would have each other.

"What now?" He asked.

Karigan smiled up at him. "I don't know," She answered truthfully. "I don't know what will happen after your wedding. All I know is that I don't want to run anymore."

Around them on the roof the torches had been lit to ward off the steadily deepening night. She felt the air reverberated with the echo's of the night she had cornered Zachary up here, the night he had confessed his love for her. They stood alone in the observatory surrounded by the sea of night once more as the Weapons made their rounds. Yet this time she let herself give in to her monarch warm touch.

She caught herself watching his lips closely, remembering the kiss they shared in the future that should never have happened, yet here she was on the brink of touching those perfect lips with her own again. As if reading her mind Zachary leant in and kissed her softly, she smiled as she returned the kiss.

"Kari..." He murmured softly stroking her hair. "I do not ask anything of you."

"I know."

She kissed him again before breaking out of his embrace to move to the coffer. She carefully closed the lid once again covering the queenly gift and handed it to Zachary. She smiled at the confusion on his face as he held the small box back out to her.

She shook her head "I want you to look after it. A gift so fine deserves to be cared for until I return."

"You will accept it then?" He asked incredulously.

She stared long and hard at him. "I will never be you paramour. But if it is still just a simple token of your affections I think I can accept it as the woman you love."

He frowned at her.

"I love you Zachary. I will stop running from you and from my feelings. So please don't tear this country apart for me. You will not be betraying me by producing an heir after all it is your duty..."

She buried herself in to his arms unable to stop the tears. She did not want him to be with anyone else but she knew that for the sake of Sacoridia that as a King he must produce an heir. No one said loving a King was easy, she thought wryly. What will become of me when he has a family and I have no one because I'm still in love with him? She tried to shake herself out of it but the tears had been welled up inside her for too long. She held on to him tightly as sobs racked her body.

Suddenly without meaning to she pushed him away and felt her body flee him. She had just said she would not run from him but the instinct was too ingrained. She would seek him in the morning when she managed to compose herself again but for now she would try to rest.