CHAPTER 15

Legolas had to find her. He wasn't going to wait until the following day. He had waited long enough. Although irate at first about his father's admission, he was surprised how these feelings were replaced by calmness and joy as the pieces of the puzzle slowly moved into place. No wonder she has always been so elusive whenever he approached her! How could she dare give him hope after being confronted by the King?

He quickened his pace until he arrived breathless in front of her door, knocking before changing his mind. Silence. He knocked again a couple of times but still he was left standing there, facing a closed door. There was nobody inside. Where had she gone at that hour? Night had fallen for some time now. Maybe she was on duty? But no! Guards who had just come from battle were exempted from guard duties.

Then where could she be? He was becoming impatient. Patience was a virtue which hadn't been inherited from father to son it seems. He was bursting with excitement which he tried to suppress under a façade of calmness and false composure, but waiting outside her door was making him more and more frustrated as the minutes ticked slowly by.

He looked up through a large glass door at the end of the corridor which led to a balcony overlooking the side of the mountain. Legolas could see the bright light of the full moon and the beauty of the stars casting long shadows behind the ornaments and sconces that adorned the corridor. It was a beautiful night, almost as if nature itself was blessing the kingdom for the wonderful gift which had been returned to them.

Legolas opened his eyes wide as he smiled to himself. Of course! Tauriel wouldn't be buried in her chamber on a night like this! He turned on his heels, heading towards the gardens. He knew where to find her now. In his haste to arrive there as quickly as possible, he paid no heed to a couple of ellons he met along the way, merely acknowledging them with a slight nod as they bowed their heads to the Prince of Mirkwood wondering where he was going in such a hurry.

By the time he arrived in the gardens he was so excited that his search for Tauriel was desperate and needy. He headed immediately to her favourite spot in an open clearing near a gurgling spring which further down ran to meet the forest river. He tried to control his feelings as he approached. He knew he had to tread carefully and that he should not have high hopes.

Tauriel had been through a lot. Her relationship, if one may call it so, with the dwarf, was short lived but intense. He had not only seen it with his eyes but felt her deep anguish at Ravenhill as she held Kili's body close to hers. The time has come now to see how deep her affection had been. And this time her sentiments would not be refrained by his father or interfered with by anybody else.

Tauriel heard him approaching and recognized his footsteps immediately. "My Lord Legolas," she greeted him with a smile as she stood up from the stone bench she had been sitting on. Her face was lit up and her eyes twinkled in the harsh light of the moon and stars. Legolas held his breath. Speechless, the first thought that crossed his mind as he looked at her was that she was positively radiant, basking in the light of the stars she loved so much.

"How is she?" she inquired, visibly eager to know how the Queen of Mirkwood was faring.

"She is still asleep. Faeron believes that she needs to rest as much as possible to allow her body and spirit to heal completely. He insisted that she must not be disturbed by anyone so only one healer is allowed in the room to check on her until she wakes up."

Her brow furrowed. "But there is still something bothering you, isn't there mellon?"

Her simple question and that one word pierced his heart. Friend. Will she ever think of him only as a friend? He took a deep breath and sat down on the bench which she had been resting on just a few minutes before. "It's father," he continued, "I don't know for how long I can keep him away from her chamber. I wouldn't be surprised to see him pacing outside her doors when I go up."

He looked at her and smiled. "I have never seen him like this Tauriel. There is a light in his eyes which wasn't there before. It is both very surprising and welcoming. He had never spoken about my mother before and today he told me how they met and how he felt the first time he set eyes on her. He didn't say much…but I could feel the love and intense emotion as he remembered that day."

Tauriel cast down her eyes as she sat next to Legolas. Then, without warning, tears started streaming down her face as she grabbed the sides of the bench tighter, trying to control the sudden emotions which were threatening to overwhelm her.

" 'There is no love in you,' that's what I told him…'no love in you'" she repeated staring blankly at the brook and trees opposite, "…when all he did was protect his people…I wouldn't have blamed him if he never forgave me for what I did!"

Legolas was shocked and taken by surprise at hearing these words. He would never have guessed that she was still blaming herself for what had happened a year ago. His heart went out to her. Gently holding her shoulders, he turned her round, facing him. Lost for words, he started to wipe away her tears and then, holding her chin with the other hand, he moved in closer until their lips touched into a sweet kiss.

Yearning deeply for love and comfort she didn't fight it at first, until she suddenly realized what was actually happening and, as if she had just been woken up brusquely from a dream, she jumped back and stood up, hands touching her trembling lips.

"No!" she almost shouted. "We shouldn't…you mustn't! I'm not…" her voice trailed off, incapable of finishing the sentence.

"…a Sindar elf?" Legolas' eyes confronted hers. "Tell me, sweet Tauriel, is that what you were going to say? For if it is, it does not matter anymore."

Tauriel looked confused, so Legolas continued. "Please listen," he said as he stood up; but he did not move any closer, wanting to give her some space, afraid she might run off without giving him time to explain why he had come looking for her. Tauriel wasn't an elleth who ran away from a fight or duty but this situation landed her in deep water. He had to reach out without frightening her, but it was entirely up to her now to grab the hand he was offering.

"Father told me about his warnings and he regrets this. We know that he has favoured you among others for many years and now I know why. He admitted tonight at how much you resembled my mother in character. Your words and actions that day made him see what he had been trying to run away from all these years since my mother was thought to be dead. He has forgiven you for your actions that same day Tauriel. Now the question remains, will you ever forgive yourself?"

Tauriel stared at him, surprised, unbelieving. These words, coming from Legolas' mouth, informing her of what had gone by during the conversation between him and his father, brought such overwhelming relief that she had to take a deep breath just to brace herself and remain standing upright. But Legolas wasn't quite finished yet. His next words took her by surprise.

"But will you forgive me, Tauriel?" He said, his crystal blue eyes filled with pain.

"For what?" she looked confused. "You have done me no wrong!"

"Yes, I did! I left you at a time when you needed me most. Jealousy and self-pity took over that day. I was angry and...wanting to distance myself from you as much as possible I just…left."

"Jealous? You were jealous of Kili?" Tauriel's eyes opened wide as she finally understood Legolas' actions and behaviour at the time.

"Terribly. I could not stand that dwarf, watching how he was gradually taking you away from me. I should have stayed, but I was so blinded that I just left without bothering to see how you were coping with the loss… But I regretted my decision every single day since then. And that is why I came back." He grinned, tentatively.

"Well, your thoughts were misplaced!" She said quietly as she made a step forward. "I loved Kili for his kind heart, so open to love that it made no distinction between elf and dwarf. My heart broke when he died and I blamed myself for his death as well, even though I had done everything I could to help him.

But I didn't bond with him. I could not. Although I had felt very strong feelings for him, and it hurt terribly to see him like that…my heart kept looking elsewhere…" She hesitated before continuing, "…at what I was warned would be impossible!"

Legolas felt a sense of elation rushing like a whirlwind inside him. His heart was pounding so fast in his chest that he thought it was going to burst. Tauriel's clear green eyes betrayed now her true feelings for him and with no other doubt or obstacle to hinder them any longer, they fell in each other's arms sealing their love with a passionate kiss under the light of the moon and stars.

Tauriel had never felt like this before. It seemed as if she was flying. Her steps were so light, her feet barely touching the ground as she headed back inside, towards her own chamber.

At one point she stopped to catch her breath. Resting against the wall, she blushed and her face illuminated with a beautiful smile that radiated a mixture of emotions. Joy, relief. Her mind went back to what had taken place in the garden just moments before. She bit her lower lip as she remembered the kiss and Legolas holding her in an embrace so tight as if he was afraid she might run away.

But she didn't move. Her stillness and look in her eyes reassured him that that was the place she wanted to be, right there in his arms. They were made for each other…had always been. With finally no more obstacles to keep them apart, that moment left them lightheaded and breathless.

Tauriel smiled again as she remembered the absurd excuse she gave him to disentangle herself from his embrace and leaving him there to regain his wits, making hurried promises that she would see him again the following morning.

It was with these sweet thoughts going through her mind that she ran round one sharp corner and bumped headlong into another elf heading the opposite way. The force was such that, apart from keeping his balance with much difficulty, he dropped the object he was carrying on the marble floor.

Tauriel was distraught, especially when she saw that it was Lathron, the King's advisor, whom she had so clumsily crashed into. She knew that even though it was an accident, he was going to take it badly. Lathron had never been friendly, but his attitude towards her, after getting to know what had happened during the battle, had changed into one of disgust and loathing. She saw it in his eyes, his cold stare always a constant reminder of her actions and mistakes. Tauriel knew that he could not understand how his beloved king had forgiven what he considered a treacherous and insignificant elleth such as her.

"Why don't you watch where you're going, you stupid elleth?" It was not the words themselves, for she had expected that outburst, but what Tauriel was not prepared for was the unreasonable hatred in his tone of voice.

Trying to placate his fury, she reached for the golden bracelet that he had dropped in their collision. However, her actions were stopped short by his sudden vice like grip on her wrist, holding her back.

"Don't touch it!" he hissed, looking coldly at her, freezing the blood in her veins. And with those words he quickly picked up the piece of jewellery, wrapped it in a cloth he was holding and marched off down the corridor, leaving Tauriel staring at him and wondering at what had just happened.