A/N: DAMN, I know, this was such a long wait :-S... I'm so sorry! But finding a new beta and then doing all required corrections took me AGES this time... GAAAAAAHHH! (But talking of "a new beta" - special thanks to Ersatz Einsein for helping out with this :)!)

So... HERE WE GO AGAIN! Finally :o)! In line with this next part of my fic, seems like we're leaving the world of fluff and we're entering a more ANGSTY world... hehe :P! As I have no clue about my own abilities as an author - let's see if I can go for the angsty stuff as well! :)

Also, I'm currently reading an incredibly amazing Zuko-fic called "Dragon at Heart"... if you haven't read it yet, GO THERE and READ IT: w w w. fanfiction . n...e...t/s/7633516/1/Dragon-at-Heart! It gave me tons of helpful suggestions and a lot of inspiration :o)... although this thing is entirely in a different league, way above my level. But still it got things rolling in my brain... like... my character-descriptions and the way everyone react and stuff. So... with Iroh's words: It is important to draw wisdom from many different places. :o) ... YES!

Besides that, there are several other things I need to explain about this first chapter of Part II, but I don't wanna give you any hints in advance ;). Background info follows right below the chap!

.~°~.

.~°~..~°~..~°~. - PART II - .~°~..~°~..~°~.

PROLOGUE

Hatred. It's a mighty power. Once it has taken hold of your heart, it keeps clinging to its every beat and never lets go again. It poisons your deeds, your thoughts and your soul. For my life had been governed by this all-consuming power. But how have I ever been supposed to feel anything but horror and pure hatred? Would there have been any other way to cope with those... occurences... back then? How is the mind supposed to endure and witness things no one should ever be forced to go through... without striving for revenge?!
Hatred was the power that kept me sane, that kept me moving forward, that kept my emotions focused… that protected me in a way.

But lately I've realized that pursuing revenge only keeps your own wounds bleeding and makes your soul go blind. And if blind hatred merely kills me bit by bit… giving in to it would be like throwing my life away. But I won't. I hope I will find a way to leave my past behind.

If I am truly the last survivor of my tribe, I will make sure their spirit will live on through my deeds. That's the least I can do. For I owe them. And possibly I am not the LAST survivor. Maybe she is still alive as well… maybe...

But no matter what. I must not throw my life away. I need to open my eyes. I need a second chance.

-x-x-x-

-7-

CONFESSIONS

There he was. Standing on the deck of the ferry, a gentle airstream blowing in his face. Cut loose from his former life, right from the second they had left Full Moon Bay. There was no turning back now. He knew he would never return to the place they had come from. He took a deep breath. Lost in thought, he kept chewing on the blade of grass that bobbed up and down between his lips.

He had heard many tales and stories about the great city of Ba Sing Se. Soon he would see it with his own eyes. Soon he would find out if it offered him the second chance he was hoping for.
But before that, he had to put this annoying, neverending ferry ride behind him. The conditions on board were... adverse, to say the least. The boat was brimming over with passengers, everyone had to sleep on the bare floor - if they found any free space at all - and the food was nauseating. It made him sick. And since he had heard rumors about the captain of the ferry dining like a king, being treated like this bothered him even more. He was unwilling to accept this situation any longer.

Injustice was something he would never be willing to tolerate. Never again. He had been forced to tolerate it back then, in that one night and the terrifying days that followed, had changed his life forever. The assaults he had had to undergo those days had been burned into his mind and his soul and had stayed there ever since. And so, he had promised himeself: Even if hatred and revenge were not the right way out of this – still he would never be capable of accepting any kind of injustice without fighting back. The day he had finally been able to escape from the hell he had been trapped in, knowing he was leaving his people behind, being unable to save them from death... that day he had made his promise. And he would keep it to the very end, no matter what. Determinedly he folded his arms and clenched his teeth, causing the blade of grass to stop moving.

"GAAAAAAHH! I'm sick of eating rotten food, sleeping in the dirt! I'm tired of living like this!" an enraged voice complained close behind him, interrupting his train of thought.

"… Are we all." He replied, slightly turning his head to find out where the voice was coming from and who else was upset about the adverse conditions on the ferry.

The enraged boy, who seemed to be some years younger than himself, was marked by a big burn scar that disfigured the right side of his face, including his right eye. The boy was accompanied by a girl… or a young woman. She was of slight build, about his own age, with long, dark brown hair. Why was her appearance so familiar to him, like he had seen her before, like he knew her, like… NO WAY! NO! This could not be possible, he had to be mistaken, it just couldn't be true… or… COULD IT?! He held his breath as he turned towards the two passengers, walking towards them. His widened eyes were focused on the girl, his heart was racing like mad.

The second she recognized him, her eyes widened just like his, reflecting the surprise she was feeling. But a second later, the same kind of horror that was written on his face was written on hers while she slowly shook her head, swallowing hard. "JET…" she breathed, staring at him in disbelief, eyes shimmering. A moment later, she whirled around, almost crashed into the boy with the burn scar, made her way past him and ran through the crowd on deck… and finally, he lost track of her.

Jet couldn't help it – he had to follow her. Or at least he wanted to. So bad. Unfortunately, he was stopped roughly by a firm grip on his arm, pulling him back. Taken by surprise, Jet turned around. The boy with the burned face was standing right behind him, unwilling to let go of his arm and giving him a distrustful look.

"Don't you DARE go after her." His voice was low but yet threatening and assertive, his flaming caramel colored eyes boring into Jet's.

"Please! I need to talk to her, I need to know why…"

"YOU need to SHUT UP. Who the hell are you and why… what did you do to my friend?!" the boy snapped.

Jet sighed. "Alright. Name's Jet. I'm… um… Sureen and me… we grew up together." The assailant's firm grip grew tighter, his fingers digging painfully into Jet's upper arm.

"That's IMPOSSIBLE. She told me she's… the only… there's no one left but her!" The edge in the boy's voice could not be missed.

"Yeah. I see. Of course. That explains her reaction. All these years she didn't have a clue… but of course not. She couldn't know. Please, I have to find her! I… I didn't expect to ever see her again. Let go of my arm! I NEED TO TALK TO HER!"

"Alright." Reluctantly, Sureen's companion loosened his grip. "But I'm coming with you." His conclusion did not leave any room for contradiction.

-x-x-x-

He was alive. IMPOSSIBLE. No way. But he had been standing right in front of her, ALIVE, in the flesh… God, his face, that look in his eyes, the way he had leaned against the wall – sure, he had grown up, but everything had still been SO HIM! Her heart had skipped a beat when she recognized him. She couldn't have been mistaken! God, how badly she missed him, how much her heart jumped for joy at the moment she had recognized his face... but things would never be the same between them. Although HE was back, their friendship would never return. A sharp pain flowed through her heart and she tried to blink away the tears that welled up in her eyes.

But this was impossible… all these years she had been so sure everyone had been killed.

And the reason for being so sure was… No, I don't want to go back there, I don't want to remember, please no, let me go, I don't want to feel it ever again… she had been so sure everyone had died… because… SHE HAD FELT IT. I can't stand this, let go of me, it's over, but still it hurts so bad, oh my God I can't take it, please no, make it stop!
Their pain, their torture, their screams of agony, their panic, their despair in contemplation of death, filling her mind, each part of her... It's all around, OH MY GOD! Although Sureen hadn't been with them, although she had been miles away, she had been cursed to feel every single torture the Fire Nation soldiers had visited upon her people that night and the days that followed. Each abuse, each violation, each rape. Every time someone's skin had been burned off by a fire blast. Whatever assaults their sick minds had come up with to make her people suffer and to completely destroy their dignity before they died.

She kept running and running across the ferry-deck, bumping into people, making her way past them somehow. Just keep running, I must get away from this... all the way down the stairs. NEED TO GET AWAY...

For Sureen, synthesizing all that torture had felt worse than dying herself would have. Maybe that had been her punishment for betraying her people. And apparently, her punishment was still far from being over. Jet was alive.
Damn, how had he made it through, how had he been able to survive, and WHY THE HELL had her abilities failed and had never told her anything about him…!? Because… it had been too much. All these emotions had swept over her heart and soul so horribly, they had just been overwhelming, they had been way too much, a terrifying flood of agony… and she hadn't been able to escape, there had been no way to flee from it. Until she had become numb, desperately clinging to Sera's back. Until she had lost space and time, her sense of orientation, her memory, simply LOST IT.

And now… she had to face him again. The boy who had been her best friend, once upon a time, in a distant past that was so painfully different from her present. She would have to face his accusations, endure his hatred and stand the disappointment and his destroyed trust. As he was up to throw it all back in her face. Of course that was what he was up to. There was no other possible reaction… No other reaction she DESERVED for what she had done.

But she was so scared. She felt tinier than ever, as she feared she would not have the heart to put up with… whatever lay ahead of her. But still she deserved it, there was no doubt about it. Slowly she slumped to the ground, pulling her knees close in search of comfort.

-x-x-x-

Zuko found her collapsed into a heap on her makeshift bed, hugging her knees, head bent forward, slowly rocking back and forth. His heart tensed up when he saw the girl cowering on the ground, a picture of misery. Hurriedly he turned back around, his eyes flashing up furiously as they met Jet's gaze. "Stay where you are. Not even ONE step closer!" With a harsh tone, Zuko ordered the guy to stand still. Then he approached Sureen.

Slowly he crouched down on the floor next to her, unsure of what to do. "Um... I've barred this jerk from coming after you. He's waiting over there." Sureen's only reply was a scarcely visible nod. "... But I swear I'm gonna burn this fucking blade of grass right in front of his nose if he dares to move one step closer," he muttered awkwardly after spending some uncomfortable seconds in silence.

Sureen slightly lifted her head, but she still seemed to find her knees incredibly interesting.

"What's going on here? Who's this moron? How is it possible he's still alive if he's really the person he pretends to be? And why... does everything about this guy feel just so... WRONG?! TALK TO ME!" Zuko couldn't hold back anymore. He didn't want to be excluded from this any longer... because... seeing Sureen like that felt so alarming, and although he didn't want to admit it to himself, he was honestly worried about her. Facing that, he was definitely NOT willing to just sit and wait for whatever was about to happen. He didn't want to feel this... helpless.

Sureen swallowed hard, entirely lifting her head to meet his gaze. "Oh Zuko... it's not like HE'S the moron... he hasn't done anything wrong at all. Don't be so mad at him. I'm the one who..." Her voice failed. The girl took a deep breath, trying to regain her composure. She clearly perceived Zuko's concern and confusion regarding the whole situation... and it just didn't feel right to leave him in the dark.

"It's just... when your past suddenly comes back to haunt you... without giving you the slightest chance to brace yourself..." She flashed him a telling glance.

Yeah, he knew that feeling by heart. But still, he couldn't think of any helpful answer. Returning her look knowingly was all he was able to do.

"You know, all these years I've been so sure everyone but me was dead. I knew it because..." Sureen ran her fingers through her hair, closing her eyes and shaking her head, as if she was trying to chase away a disturbing thought. "I just knew it. Or rather, I thought I knew it. But obviously there was something... someone... my mind had overlooked in between... all that... whatever."

She looked up again. Whatever pain she had just tried to shake away was apparently still there. Her effort had been of little avail. Her eyes still exuded such agony that Zuko was the one who had to avert his gaze now. Once again the feeling of being entirely insufficient came creeping over him. He didn't have a clue what to say now, what to do to comfort her. He couldn't think of any helpful reaction.

"No, never mind. It's okay. That's life, I guess. Or at least MY life. The only way out is through, isn't it..." Sureen shrugged her shoulders, giving him an awkward smile. The prince sighed. That didn't sound exactly convincing.

"Well... speaking of 'through'... He told me he needs to talk to you." With a short glance over his shoulder, Zuko pointed at Jet... before turning to Sureen again and lowering his voice. "But I won't let him... If you don't want to talk to him... I won't let him get closer." There was no doubt he meant it. Another gentle smile flashed over the girl's face. She couldn't deny that Zuko being that protective towards her was kind of touching.

"Don't you worry. Jet is my ex-very-best-friend, you know. So... whatever it is he needs to tell me... he's right. It's nothing but the truth, from his point of view. And I have to listen. I owe him. There's just no way around it. And so... it'll make no difference if I'll face this now or later. So... the sooner, the better."

The prince could tell from her shimmering eyes that she was anything but at ease with the idea of facing this Jet-jerk right now. But he also understood her wish to get it over with as soon as possible. Hesitatingly, Zuko got up from the floor with another deep-drawn sigh. He granted Jet permission to take his place by throwing another look at him and nodding at him in agreement.

"Hey up there..." As he was just about to turn around and leave, he felt a soft kick in his shin. "... Thank you" Sureen whispered, still huddled on her makeshift bed, looking up to him. Also, for the first time it seemed as if she was looking up at him, he noticed confusedly.

"What for." His scarcely audible reply sounded more like a statement than a question. Hurriedly, he turned away to leave the field clear to this Jet-guy.

The girl smiled. "For watching over me."

While walking away, Zuko heard Sureen's voice close behind him, making him stop for a second. With a heavy heart, the prince eventually backed out onto the deck, knowing the conversation between them wasn't destined for him.

Back on deck, he leaned against the railing. He felt a sharp gust of wind blowing in his face and closed his eyes. In a few days they would reach the opposite shore of Lake Laogai and the gates of Ba Sing Se. Although the city painfully reminded him of his uncle, it appeared to be the safest place to go, considering the fact that nearly every soldier of the Fire Nation seemed to be chasing him. And, to be honest, after he'd sufficiently recovered from his injuries, heading towards Ba Sing Se had simply been the first idea that had come to his mind when he considered a destination... as he needed to go somewhere. And since his uncle had passed away, his world had been upside down, and still it was. Still he found himself unable to think about how to go on. With his mission to capture the Avatar, with fighting his sister, with escaping from the Fire Nation troops and from his real identity... with... his life, after all. He swallowed hard.

Eventually, he opened his eyes again, letting them travel over the churning waves of Lake Laogai. Water as far as the eye could see. No land in sight.
'And no matter how hard I try... Sometimes it just feels like... I'm nothing but a tiny drop in this endless ocean...' When he remembered Sureen's words, another sigh escaped Zuko's lips. If this Jet-guy down there DARED to hurt her... by doing no matter what...! The prince frowned.

Nothing but water. All the way to the horizon. This was definitely NOT his element. And this was not even his ship. He was nothing more than a passenger, just like everyone else. But well… it didn't matter. He had lost his feeling of safety anyway – it made no difference whether he was surrounded by water or by anything else. In fact, it was needless to put him on a weird black flying creature's back or to take him to whatever other place in order to make him feel like he had no control over anything. He had lost control anyway.
Maybe the enormous wall around the city of Ba Sing Se would provide a little more security and the opportunity to retreat from... well... from what?! From the Fire Nation, in the first place. Just like almost everyone on the ferry, Zuko was just another refugee by now. But still it felt as if it was not only the Fire Nation he was trying to hide from.

Lost in thought, he let his eyes wander across the lake.

-x-x-x-

"Well... this is… a bit unexpected. I didn't mean to scare you earlier. I'm sorry if I did." Jet had taken a seat on Sureen's makeshift bed, right where Zuko had sat. And just like the prince a few minutes before, he couldn't prevent an uncomfortable feeling from creeping over him. "I... I haven't exactly been prepared for this either. To be honest, I hadn't expected this to happen. Ever seeing you again, I mean. So... long time no see, right..."

Wasn't he supposed to be happy right now? Wasn't this the very moment he had been secretly awaiting ever since his escape? But now that it had finally turned real... it felt so... unreal. And weird. And for some reason there was an anxious tension in the air, making it hard to breathe.

"Yeah. I had no idea... that... you... I was sure everyone had been killed. I abandoned everyone to their fate. All these years I was so damn sure there couldn't have been any survivors from that... nightmare." Sureen replied in a strained voice, not daring to look over at him.

"Well, sneaking around unnoticeably has always been one of my strong points, remember? So... not the first time I succeeded in staying under everyone's radar." he chuckled slightly. "So I assume... considering you are one of those who have been carrying our tribe's heritage... who have been given the gift of our ancestors... considering that, I assume... you shared everything with us then?"

Without lifting her head, the girl nodded. "Every second. Each... assault. Whatever anyone at any time had felt. So... be assured that my abilities were nothing but a GIFT back then. It's been my punishm... my right..ful punishment." Her voice cracked.

Jet's eyes went wide with disbelief. He looked at her blankly for a while before he regained his power of speech. "Sorry... but... what part of that story have I missed? Correct me if I'm wrong... according to what I've heard, punishment requires a crime or a severe misbehavior. So... what exactly did you do back then that makes you think you deserved punishment?!"

Sureen swallowed. "That night... when the Fire Nation... I was right there. Literally just around the corner. When I noticed that something was going on down there, I ran back to the village... only to stop moving and to hide behind a tree as soon as I was close enough to see the flames and everything. Upon realizing what was happening, it was like... my mind and my body froze with fear. I was petrified. I just couldn't move or think or do whatever. So I just hid behind that fucking tree, watching everything and doing NOTHING. I let you down. I let everyone down. I sent them to their certain death without even TRYING to... whatever. The only reason I survived back then, is that I was the most incredible coward ever."

Telling this story for the second time now, fighting back the tears came easier to her. But instead, her heart was in her mouth. She had just revealed the "crime" Jet had been asking her about. Now he knew the score. Now it was his turn to... accuse her, scold her, yell at her... hate her.

And hatred was a mighty power.

Come with me
Let me walk you through the world that I currently live in
Not a thing is forgotten, not a thing is forgiven
Nobody can hold their own underneath the weight, but
Nobody can take the blame for their own mistakes, so
What do you do when somebody lets you down
And you wanna say something, but you can't, 'cause they're not around
Inside you think they know the extent of the pain
But they won't even admit that they were the one to blame

Can somebody please just explain to me
What happened to the way that we always said we'd be
'cause right now I don't know why I push through the pain that I got through
And I'm losin' hope...

Deafening voices that frequency inside my head
That says, I'm going at it the hard way
I focus get everything inside out of my brain
That claims, I'm going at it the hard way

[FORT MINOR - THE HARD WAY]

LINK TO THIS SONG:
w w w. myvideo. de/ watch/ 6681688/ Fort_Minor_feat_Kenna_The_Hard_Way
[copy+paste - remove blanks - enter :)!]

-x-x-x-

A/N: Yeah, this is pretty much a cliffhanger I guess...! Hehe, but I've always wanted to write such a thing... so here you are! At least for once. ;)

Alright... but... JET. Yaaaayyy :o)! He's gonna be a pretty crucial character in this... at least for the following chapters. But you need some more background info on "my" Jet ;).

1) He's older than he is in the "real" canon. (You'll find out soon why this is necessary...) In the canon, I think he tells Katara, he had been 8 when the Fire Nation had burned down his village. But for this fic, let's suppose he had been 13 back then. And the actual fic takes place 10 years after that. So now he's 23, Sureen is like 22 and Zuko's 16 years old.

2) "My" Jet is probably a little OOC. But this was kind of unavoidable, as the original character, imo, is a little "limited" :P. So I "extended" it in order to give Jet a more complete personality. What I've learned about him in the canon is, mainly, that he really deeply hates the Fire Nation... and so he's obsessed with... not necessarily killing everyone... but with taking revenge. And I was wondering why. Why he hates them THAT much. And so I added some additional... reasons... which could be an explanation for this. (You'll find out more about those reasons in the next chapter :P.)

3) But eventually, Jet decides to go to Ba Sing Se in order to leave his past behind, to give himself a second chance. So I guess he's trying to change his former behavior (like his attitude towards the Fire Nation and stuff). Maybe that little almost-romance-thing between him and Katara had some effects on him in retrospect and, eventually, made him change his mind.

4) Oh and speaking about romance... seems like Jet has quite a "womanizing side" as well, right? ;)

So... I took the given info and made up everything else. This wasn't easy to start with, as I didn't have "a feeling for Jet" at the beginning... like I didn't know him. So I guess I just wrote him like the way I want him to be. ;)
And I can't wait to upload chapter 8 :o). It's almost done already! Man... that's gonna be... intense! :) :P :O

In the meantime, the review box is all yours! :)