Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Damn, it's been forever, huh? Would it make you all feel better if I said I was in Georgia:Sweatdrop: Cuz I was! And my aunt was being stingy and wouldn't let me use her laptop :Grumbles: But now there's an update and be happy, cuz while I was in Georgia (without a comp), I was able to plan things for future JLH chaps. Up to at least chapter 25 including two more filler chapters that are actually important, unlike the Haruka, Silo, Majik smut filler XD They'll be about how Hidan and Itachi met and their friendship and such (including... smex?), and how the Akatsuki came together and why Orochimaru left and went against them.
I also thought of another fic :Sigh: I'm already doing too much stuff... I have no personal time ne more and I'm gonna cry :Tears: But it's about the Virtues and Sins, etc. Expect that to have an extremely sad ending XD I am the drama queen! Ne who, I don't think I'll be cosplaying as Sai for Otakon any more... :Huff: Just too much stuff to deal with, soooooo I'm gonna go as C.C. from Code Geass instead! W00t for the bestest show eva! It's tied with Naruto, seriously. C.C.'s the shit, son! And the first anime character I've seen that's totally obsessed with Pizza Hut XD
I'm rambling, sorry. Uh... enjoy?
The loud beeping of a heart monitor bounced off the plain, white walls of the hospital room, reminding Itachi that the man in front of him was still alive. His hands were clutching a frail one, fingertips stroking pale skin, running over bruises and scrapes. He'd never seen his friend so weak and fragile...
When they were little (in their elementary years), Itachi and Hidan had been on opposite sides of the school spectrum. Hidan was the little trouble-maker that the teachers hated and the students loved to laugh at, and Itachi was the stubborn, yet quiet genius that everyone adored and showered with praise. In school, because they were so different, they'd never see each other. Itachi would be in class, filling his mind with knowledge, while Hidan would be dragged away to the principal's office because of some stupid prank.
It happened to be a strike of fate that brought them together one humid day in spring.
It was April and the entire fourth grade class was outside in the school field, various kids running about, playing tag and such. Itachi and Hidan had happened to be playing the same game that day; hide-and-seek. Of course, since the group was so huge, they hadn't paid any special attention to each other. And as soon as everyone was split into the hiders and the seekers (Hidan being a seeker, much to his annoyance), the game started.
Itachi had climbed into the school's tallest maple tree, staying there for a good half an hour. He knew recess would be ending soon, but kept still, since like most Uchiha men, his motto was "I won't give up" Another ten minutes had passed by and he'd become uncomfortable in his position on the thick branch, so he'd shifted, only to slip and tumble from the high tree.
Lucky for him, though, a certain someone had broken his fall.
"Itai..." the small, scrawny Itachi had whimpered and rolled off a soft body. "Are you ok?"
There'd been a grunt and a muffled curse, then the other boy had slowly sat up, cradling his injured arm. "Where'd you come from, Weasal-san? D'ya fall from the sky?" Hidan had inspected him then.
"Weasal...?"
"Yeah, your name, it means weasal. Che, goody little Uchiha Itachi," the silver-haired child had grinned. "Jeez, I think I broke my arm, again... Mom's gonna be mad."
That had been their first meeting and, even then, Hidan was a very strong person. No injury brought him down, no scorn lowered his self-esteem, and no random kid falling from the sky kept him down for long. Hidan was truly the strongest person Itachi knew...
And now he was holding the hand of said indestrucable male and he felt weak, so unlike himself. He'd always been just as strong as Hidan, but only when the loud man was there, supporting him. Now the other was immobile, so weak that he needed tubes to breath, needed to tubes to give him his food and water.
"It's like you always said," he began quietly, sitting back in the uncomfortable blue chair. "God was going to get you one day," his smile was small and strained, but visible on his handsome, yet aged, face. Standing up, he pulled his cellphone from the confines of his Akatsuki cloak. He rarely wore it when in Japan, not wanting to draw unwanted attention to himself. But the rest of the group, excluding Sasori, wore them all the time, mostly because of their stupidity and carelessness.
Going to a contact on his freinds list, he pressed the call button and put the small phone to his ear, listening to the low rings. After a few moments, someone answered. It was his company secretary, Asuhina.
"Uchiha Corporations, this is Shiozu Asuhina speaking, how may I help you?"
The Uchiha thrummed his fingers on soft bed sheets, still listening to Hidan's heart monitor. "This is Itachi," there was a squeek on the other end of the line, then the girl gave a polite greeting to her boss. "Tell everyone I won't be coming to the company this afternoon, I have other business that needs taken care of. But I will be sending someone in soon, his name is Uzumaki Naruto, one of my new actors. He asked to take a look around the other day, so make sure he's given a guide," he didn't even wait for the woman's reply before snapping his phone shut and tucking it away.
Brushing bangs from his eyes, he moved toward the door. "I'm going to get food from the cafeteria, is there anything you'd like?"
Across the room, behind a drawn curtain, Sasuke sat in his own hospital bed. His arms were crossed and bandages were wrapped around his head, tuffs of black hair poking out between wraps. The raven glared at nothing and mumbled a "Sure" before lying back and sighing.
Itachi left the room, closing the door behind him. He didn't blame Sasuke for what happened, not at all. He couldn't blame his brother for something he couldn't control. And he wasn't ignoring him; it was just... since Sasuke had woken up in the hospital, he'd been suffering from male PMS. The doctors said he was constantly angry because of his concussion, but Itachi knew it was because he didn't know how to handle his guilt for what had happened.
It seemed like Itachi would just have to have a little chat with his younger brother later.
xXxXx
Naruto stared up at the huge building that seemed to be covered in millions of tinted windows. He stalked through the crowd of people, almost stumbling over a blind man's walking stick. He mumbled an apology, then stepped through the glass, automatic doors that led him inside the Uchiha corporation. The day before, while he and Itachi were watching over Sasuke and Hidan, Naruto had asked the older raven about the acting company he owned. He'd wanted to take a peek at it, but instead, Itachi gave him full permission to tour the damn place!
Looking around the clean first floor, he saw large potted plants by the metal stairs and elevators, a few clean-cut men conversing by the front desk, a child being led upstairs by a stern looking woman, and a mousy female sitting behind the front desk, typing away on a computer. She scratched the top of her head absently, then looked up at the talking men in front of her, telling them to move along. When they did, she caught a glimpse of Naruto and smile cutely.
"A blond male with blue eyes, you must be Uzumaki-san!" she stood quickly and bowed, moving around her desk to shake Naruto's hand. "Uchiha-san told me you'd be coming soon, so I have a special escort for you."
The blond smiled back to her and muttered a "thank you" before looking around again, curious as to how the place could be so clean and shiny...
Hey, I can see my reflection in the floor! he glanced down at himself on the tile flooring and waved, doing a little jig before someone in front of them cleared their throat. He laughed stupidly, but blinked cerulean orbs when he saw the blond and red-head in front of him, wearing cloaks similar to Hidan, Itachi, and Tobi's.
"Name's Deidara, un," the feminine male held out his hand and Naruto almost took it, but jerked back when he saw the strange tattoo of a mouth on the other's palm. Deidara chuckled and gave a cheesy grin. "It's not real, Kinpatsu."
...Why does everyone in those stupid coats call me that?
The red-head was the next to speak, his voice rich like Sasuke's, but lighter, with a hint of malice, despite his blank face. "Let's take him on the tour. We have to hand Kakuzu our bills soon, remember?" he turned and began walking, his black boots clacking against the marble floor. His cloak fluttered around his ankles, and Deidara snickered.
"Don't mind Sasori-danna, he's like a grouchy old woman, un," the long-haired man stated, then tugged Naruto forward by the sleeve, ushering him to the front, behind Sasori. They went up the stairs, and as they reached the second floor, Deidara began pointing to doors, explaining what rooms they were and such. Naruto thought it might've been a bit boring, but he actually found it interesting, thanks to Deidara's vivid imagination.
"What's that room?" Naruto looked at the door at the very end of the hall. Dust was over the name plate, but he didn't move to wipe it away. Sasori gave him a blank look.
"A janitor's closet. Must we tell you about every little thing, Uzumaki-san?"
Blushing a bit in embarrassment, Naruto laughed nervously and scratched the back of his neck. "Oh, no, sorry."
They continued their tour up until the very last floor, where Deidara and Sasori's attention were drawn elsewhere. There was a gorgeous woman standing in the middle of the hall, looking around as if she were lost. Her short dress hugged her frame perfectly and Naruto snickered, understanding why they'd stop and stare. She tucked a lock of her short auburn hair behind a pierced ear and gave them a smile when she noticed them.
Naruto noted Sasori's narrowing eyes.
"E-Excuse me," she ran to them, waving her hand lightly. "Do you know where I could find Itachi-san?" she had such a pretty face, her make-up just right. Naruto couldn't tear his eyes from her, but for some reason, he wasn't as drawn to her as he'd like to be...
"Itachi-san?" Deidara turned to Sasori, then gave the woman a handsome smile. "Please come this way, un. Naruto-kun, I hope you can find your way back downstairs?"
Naruto nodded and stuffed his tan hands in his jacket pockets. He watched them head towards a large door at the very end of the hall and disappear inside. The woman turned to give him a look, then she smirked to herself as the door closed behind them.
xXxXx
Naruto pushed open the door to Hidan and Sasuke's hospital room, his jacket slung over his arm. Tossing the bright orange item onto the floor, he gaped at Hidan's opened eyes. The silver-haired male gave him a weak wave and grinned beneath an oxygen mask. He'd woken up an hour earlier, Itachi absent from the room. He still hadn't returned and Hidan wanted to trick the male when he came back.
"You're ok," Naruto said, relieved. "And it looks like at least one of your arms isn't broken."
Hidan let out a raspy laugh, then coughed loudly, his oxygen mask slipping from his mouth. He took a deep breath and smiled. "Yeah, I feel like shit. I wake up, hoping to be in Weasal-san's arms, but instead..." he pouted. "I'm in a damn hospital bed. I thought the whole car thing was just a stupid dream," he looked up in thought, despite the ache in his neck and shoulders. He winced.
"You have a lot of broken bones, but you'll be ok. That's what the doctor said, anyway," Naruto headed over to Sasuke's bed and pulled something from his back pocket, waving it around. "I brought you something special, Teme! Praise me," he laughed.
Sasuke glared at him. "What is it?"
"Don't look so angry all the time," Naruto complained. "Your face'll get stuck that way and then all of the sexy men will hate you and you'll live a lonely, sexless life. The closest thing you'll get to sex will be when you get a prostate check."
The raven let his frown disappear, then raised a brow. "I've already had sex, Dobe."
"...Oooh, who with?"
"That's none of your business. Now, give me my gift," Sasuke held out his hand expectantly.
"Che, here," the blond sat a box of red candies on the other man's palm, smiling. "I saw these at a little store on the way back. I figured you were probably lonely since you don't have a cute boyfriend checking up on you every minute with gifts and words of adoration," he grinned. "So I'm going to take that role until you're out of this place tomorrow! How about it, Sasu-chan? I'm sure I'd make a wonderful boyfriend!"
Sasuke's heart thumped in his chest and he resisted the urge to burst out into a bright smile. He gripped the little box of candies and let his lips twitch upward. He wasn't going to tell the blond how much he wished he really was his boyfriend, so he settled with a scoff and a muttered "Dobe".
"Hey, I'm trying to be a good friend here! I thought it wouldn't be fair that I pretended to be Sai's boyfriend when he was in the hospital and not yours. Soooo, you'll call me your koibito and I'm gonna call you my Sasu-chan," Naruto beamed.
The younger Uchiha rolled his eyes, but narrowed them when Hidan broke out into fits of girlish giggles. He shut up, though, when footsteps could be heard in the hall. He told Naruto to hide behind the curtain around Sasuke's bed, then yanked the cord from the heart monitor, the green line on the screen straightening and the beeping becoming one long, endless ring. He laid back and closed his eyes, pretending to be dead.
Behind the curtains, Sasuke sighed and Naruto muffled his laughter behind his hands.
The door slammed open a moment later and Itachi came in, eyes wide and full of fear, so Naruto saw when he peeked around the baby blue hospital curtian. Sasuke dragged him back and kept himself from looking, not wanting his brother to think he was involved in the prank whatsoever.
"Hidan...?" the voice was hesitant, scared. Itachi slowly walked to the bed and held a hand, surprised to find that it was warm. Soon, amethyst eyes fluttered open and Hidan smiled, not a grin, but a gorgeous, full-fledged smile.
"Weasal-san, your fear woke me from the dead. Our love is soooo strong," the man then laughed and sat up slowly, his aching spine protesting. He looked into Itachi's eyes, still seeing the fear there. His smile disappeared and he placed his good hand on the older man's arm, stroking the soft fabric of his cloak. "Look, you're wearing the cloak..." he whispered. "You only wear it during business or really important times... I'm guessing I'm someone important?"
Itachi took a step forward and did something so unlike him that it even surprised Hidan. He hugged him. He pulled Hidan's head against his chest and held him, arms wrapping around stiff shoulders, fingers pressing through non-gelled silver hair. His black bangs fell over closed eyes and he spoke.
"I'm going to rip your balls off," he stated fondly.
Hidan burst into fits of laughter, his broken ribs throbbing and shutting him up immediately. Itachi laid him back down and looked at the heart monitor, plugging the cord back in, the little beeps starting back up again. "I'm going to go tell the doctors you're awake," he then pressed a chaste kiss against chapped lips and Hidan tensed, surprised. Itachi left the room and he sighed, looking over at Naruto who was peeking out from behind the curtain.
"I should throw myself in front of Sasuke and get hit by stunt cars more often," he smiled. "If Weasal-san's going to be so sweet and tender like that."
Sasuke glared behind Naruto.
The blond came out from behind the curtain and stepped toward the door, grabbing his coat. "Shit, I forgot to pick up the new mattress for Silo's bed."
Sasuke raised a brow. "Did he wet the bed or something?"
"No, no, I spilled a beer all over it."
Both Hidan and Sasuke remained quiet.
"Well, I'll be back as soon as I take the mattress back to the house. Hidan, don't give Itachi a heart attack, and Sasuke... eat those little candies I gave you and put a smile on," he joked.
The raven glared daggers.
xXxXx
Sasori slammed the woman up against the wall and bent her arms behind her back, keeping her in place. Deidara was leaning against the wall, arms crossed, good eye closed in thought. A few other cloaked men stepped toward them, looking at the female with either looks of disgust or a smirk.
"Another whore sent by Orochimaru?" a man with sickly skin, dyed blue hair and tattoos of gills on his face asked gruffly. "When's he going to approach us himself? I'm sick of calling up those damn brothels."
The woman struggled, but wailed in agony when her arm was twisted painfully. Sasori didn't lighten his grip.
"You'd think he get tired of using the same old trick," a bulky man with green eyes and a white hood grumbled.
"Well, I suppose we'll just have to deal with her the same way we've dealt with all of the others," a man with white and black pace paint and green hair said calmly.
The woman snarled and thrashed, but couldn't escape.
xXxXx
Naruto looked up at all of the items on the cafe menu, drooling. He'd planned on just getting the mattress and taking it back, but his stomach had protested loudly half way back, grumbling and churning for food. So he stopped at a peaceful looking cafe in the city. As he ordered a coffee and turkey sub, he took a seat at a table.
Tilting his head back, he sighed. Blinking when someone approached him, he turned. There, in front of him, was a red-haired male with stunning green eyes surrounded in black. He nodded his head.
"Are you Uzumaki Naruto?"
"Um... yes? Are you a fanboy...? I don't trade autographs in for blowjobs and I don't have sex with anyone under the age of twenty unless they're REALLY hot... and have a vagina."
The other male raised invisible eyebrows. "I'm an actor."
"Oh! Are you signed up with Itachi's company too?"
The unknown man nodded.
"Then sit down! If you wanted to chat about acting, then you should've said so! Sooo, what's your name?" Naruto grinned and thanked the waitress that sat his food and coffee down in front of him. "And why haven't I seen you before?"
The red-head stared ahead, not looking at Naruto at all. "Sabaku Gaara. I've been working on a film in Germany for the past year."
"Germany, hmm? That's cool," Naruto seemed all too happy to talk to Gaara, his smile wide, his eyes shining. He lifted up his turkey sub and took a large bite out of it, munching and swallowing thickly, careful so he wouldn't choke.
"I wanted to talk to you about something," Gaara began steadily. "How did you become an actor? I heard from a fellow actor that Sasuke found you in America?"
Naruto grinned. "Yep, I was lucky enough to land a major role! Now I can give my son the life he deser-- shit, I'm supposed to pick him up from school right now! I lost track of time!" he quickly stood and grabbed his sandwhich and drink. "Um, I'm sorry, Gaara, but--"
"It's alright, I understand. I only wanted to meet you, anyway," Gaara stood and nodded his head in farewell. "We'll see each other on set soon, I hope."
"Yeah, see you around!" then Naruto stumbled out of the shop, cursing at himself for being a bad father.
Gaara watched him leave, then flipped open his cellphone.
xXxXx
In the center of a filthy allyway, the woman from before stood, a bulky, older man beside her. She was allowed one more call before her phone would be taken away. Pressing in a few numbers, she lifted the device to her ear.
"Orochimaru-sama, I wasn't able to find Itachi..." she winced when harsh words were said to her on the other line. "No, sir, I... Well, there was a blond man with them... I'm sure they know him, so... His name? I didn't get his surname, but they called him Naruto..." her boss hung up on her and she growled when the large men took her phone, and was yanked inside of the dirty brothel.
Next chapter: Sasuke has a heart to heart talk with Itachi, Silo's approaching birthday, Hidan's feelings, Haruka and Majik's little squabble over Silo, and a kiss that changes lust to love.