Once upon a time, Fionna the Human and Cake the Cat were fighting Shark and Science Dog in front of their house.
"Shaggy dog!" Cake called her, "Come here!"
The Science Dog threw a potion on her that turned Cake into a butterfly.
"Hey!" she groaned, being chased by her, "help!"
"Don't worry! Her spells never last long," Fionna reassured her, on top of the shark before jumping on the dog.
"Who are these guys? This is a great fight!" Cake admitted.
"Yeah! You never fought them?" she wondered, fighting the shark back, "they come out every day at four o'clock on the dot."
"I guess that's because I meet Lord Monochromicorn every day at four o'clock on the dot," she guessed, reverting to her normal self before realizing, "oh shoot! I'm late!"
"You should stay, honey," she adviced, "at five o'clock every day, I chop both their heads off, and they grow them back for the next day."
"Aw, girl, that sounds awesome!" she said, picking up her bicycle, taking a orange and her viola, "I do want to stay and fight those guys, but I also want to hang out with my boyfriend."
"Boo!" Fionna complained.
"I should probably go," she sighed, "I'll see ya later, sis."
"Bye", the blonde human told her as she rode off, resuming her fight.
Cake rode up to Lord Monochromicorn's house and climbed up onto the roof with Lord Monochromicorn who was waiting for her.
"Sorry! Sorry I'm late," she apologized, her orange and violin with her, "Fionna and I were fighting this shark and science dog, and I lost track of time. Anyway, I'm here now, my lord, and I have brought to you half an orange."
They both ate half the fruit.
"T-H-A-N-K-S," he said in Morse language before a beam from his horn hit a tree, turning it gray.
"Nice! Now make that white!" she pointed at the river as the unicorn was doing as she asked, "ha ha ha! Yeah, that's good."
"I-L-L G-O T-O S-L-E-E-P," he then warned her.
"Sleep!" she wondered, "but we were supposed to play viola together!"
"S-O-R-R-Y" he apologized, kissing her forehead, "Y-O-U W-E-R-E L-A-T-E."
"Yeah," she sighed, "sorry again for coming so late."
"N-I-G-H-T," he told her, walking away.
Then, Cake rode home on a path through a forest on her bike with her viola in the basket.
"Hi Cake," a worm said, popping out of the instrument.
"Oh, hey, Shela," the cat greeted her.
"Why you looking so down in the dumps?" she noticed as Cake made a deflating noise, "No response, huh? Guess you're good."
"I'm fed up, Shela!" she admitted.
"Hmm?" she wondered
"Whenever I hang out with Lord Monochromicorn, I miss out on fun times with Fionna," she explained as she was using hand gestures to add emphasis, so she kept swerving, "and then when I hang out with Fionna, I'm missin' out on Lord Monochromicorn!"
She lifted her hands in the air and he crashed into a tree.
"Hey, Cake, why don't you just hang out with both of them at the same time?" she asked.
"And then I won't miss anything!" she realized, "Shela! My problems are solved."
Cake had then the best idea ever: a picnic with her two favorite people by the flames!
"Ah, isn't this great? This is totally great. Isn't it?" she asked, between them.
They both agreed, the unicorn morsing it.
"What? What did he say?" Fionna asked.
"He said he also thinks it's great," she translated.
"Hmm…" the cat thought to break the akward silence, crawling up in front of them, "hey, did you know that you both have an awesome sense of humor?"
"We do?" Fionna asked.
"Yeah! Anybody have a joke?" she wondered.
"Oh, I have a joke!" Fionna laughed, "Okay: Knock knock."
"W-H-O-S T-H-E-R-E ?" Lord Monochromicorn asked.
"He said, "who's there?""
"Diarrhea!" she exclaimed.
"W-H-A-T I-S T-H-A-T? I-T I-S N-O-T A J-O-K-E," he confessed before drinking.
"Did he say diarrhea who?" she wondered.
"Uh, no. No, he didn't say, 'diarrhea who?' He didn't…," she pondered, "say it. Lord, how 'bout you tell a joke?"
He thought a little before stomping and scratching.
"Y-O-U R-E-M-E-M-B-E-R W-H-E-N W-E G-O-T N-A-K-E-D A-N-D R-U-N-K A-R-O-U-N-D T-H-E F-A-R-M?"
They both giggled at the memory and the farmer,'s face that day.
"What's the joke?" the girl wondered.
"Uhh... well, the joke doesn't translate very well," she lied.
"Honey, I- I might leave. Is it okay if I leave? I kind of want to go fight something," she confessed.
"Noooo! Don't leave," she stopped her, "if there was only some way you two could talk to each other directly… Oh, honey! I just remembered! There's a universal translator device at the bottom of Lake Szelezon!"
"The lake guarded by evil Lake Knights?" Fionna remembered.
"Yeah, I can't remember why I threw it in there," she admitted, "let's all go and get it!"
"Whoa, Cake" she whispered to her, taking her apart, "You're inviting Monochromicorn? No offense, but isn't he a little too unexperimented for deadly adventure?"
"Trust me, Fionna, he's the Rowdy King. He can do anything!"
" Hmmm. Alright!" she agreed, showing her fist "trust pound!"
Fionna rode Cake to make the journey as Lord flew beside them. They got to the lake and Lord turned them white with his horn.
"Underwater camouflage!" Fionna giggled.
Meanwhile a snail was waving, unnoticed.
They swam down into the lake. Fionna pointed towards a group of lake knights rushing towards them. Fionna fended off a few and Cake grabbed a bunch and punched them. Lord attacked a few as Fionna was strangling one knight when she noticed the treasure at the bottom of the lake. She threw aside the dead lake knight and swam towards it. She grabbed the translator and gave a thumbs up to Cake and Lord. Cake was giving a thumbs up back when the lake started rumbling. Fionna was shocked as knights began surrounding her from the crevasse surrounding the treasure. They overcame Fionna as Cake got distracted by a couple while Lord swam down and knocked them away from Fionna by spinning around. Fionna rode Lady past Cake and out of the lake. They shouted in victory as Cake came out along.
"Lord! You are incredible!" Fionna admitted, "you should adventure with us all the time!"
"All according to plan," Cake chuckles to herself.
"T-H-A-N-K-S I-T W-A-S F-U-N."
"Uhhh, what?" she wondered.
"Here's the translator," Cake brought the gadget, putting it on Lord's forehead, going through the options, "The voice options are... Old woman, nerdy alien, ooor nightmare? Try sayin' something toots!"
Turned to nightmare, Lord only made scratchy noises. She changed it to old woman
"-and then I ate all the peaches in the orchard, and that farmer was sooo angry!"
"I like this voice!" Fionna laughed
Trying nerdy alien, Lord made some gurgley, indistinguishable noises.
"-and that's the end of my story." Lord finished, back to old woman.
"Well," she sighed, "at least with old woman option we can understand her, I MEAN HIM! I mean you babe!"
"Hop on my back," he offered, "and I'll give you a ride home!"
"Whatever you say grandma!" Fionna teased, riding him, "Hai-yah!"
"Come on darling," he said to his girlfriend, "wrap your legs around me."
"I remember why I drowned that translator now," she sighed, annoyed.
"Hey grandma, how are you able to fly if you don't have wings?" Fionna asked, high in the sky.
"Well, darkness travels from the universe. Then bounces off of our planet and then back into our eyes so we can perceive shadows," he explained as Cake was being bounced around, "my body can intercept that darkness and dance around on it." Cake is sliding off of her
"Lord! It's a little rocky in the back seat here!" Cake confessed, sliding off of him.
"Shmow!" Fionna laughed before seeing something down below, "that forest wizard is giving away free power rings!"
"Do you wanna try gettin' some Fionna?" Lord asked.
"Yeahs!" she exclaimed as he dove down towards the clearing.
"Loooord," Cake screamed, flying off his tail, before turning into a flat hang-glider-like object, "Fiiiionnnnaaaaa,Loooord! Fionaaaaaaaaaaa! Lord!"
She ended up in the forest, alone.
"Lord! Fionna!" she called,getting bigger and bigger, "y'all around here? Dang it!"
Listening closely, she could hear her best friend and her boyfriend.
Both were cheering from the wizard
"Whoa! Did you see that!? This is like the funnest thing ever!" the human yelled, seeing the magic tricks.
"There you are!" Cake shouted, bursting through the trees, scaring everyone else away, "Where were you guys?"
"Wait a minute, you didn't fly down with us?" Fionna realized as she shrunk back.
"We thought you were behind us the whole time!" Lord confessed.
"Noooo!" she snapped, sobbing, "I fell off your tail end! I was shouting your name!"
"Ooh! Sweetheart, we probably couldn't heard you because of the cloud density," he apologized, seeing his girlfriend both sad and mad.
"Cake!" Fionna called, "check out these power rings!"
The rings each expelled some sort of magical display.
"That's cool!" she said as the blonde human was showing off their powers, "you got ten of them?"
"Yeah! Lord got some too," she explained as the unicorn showed his.
"Uh, You want one of mine?" she asked her best friend, "I've got so many."
"Yeah! Thanks honey!"
"Oh. Wait," she said as she tried in vain to give one to her, "I can't take them off. I guess they're cursed. Still pretty cool though."
"Yeah, they're awesome," she mumbled, depressed as the rings shot blue fire.
Back to that house, night had fallen, Cake was sitting on the couch while Lady and Fionna played a racing game. She was drinking tea, watching them both playing.
"Alright this time I'm gonna destroy you Monochromicorm!" Fionna laughed
"Oh, okay. That sounds nice," he chuckled as Cake was coming behind him.
"Oh I got the sword!" Fionna exclaimed.
"Hey, Lord," Cake called, "you wanna go play music together or somethin'?"
"Oh, oh. Uh," he hesitated, "I would, but I-I'm in the middle of this game."
"Oh," she sighed, turning to the other "hey Fionna. After this next game do you wanna go adventurin' with me?"
"Lord and I are going to a party in the Cloud Kingdom tonight," she confessed, "you should go to that with us.
"Humph! Humph Humph Humph!" she kept sighing very worried.
"Cake stop sighing you're messing up my game!" Fionna complained though she did not stop, "Cake! What's goin' on with you!"
"Mmmm, Nothin'!" she lied.
"Awww dang it!" she cursed as the unicorn won, "man, Lord you're too good at this! Hey, It's time to party with clouds! Cake, you comin'?"
"No!" she said.
"Honey," she walked towards her, "I thought you wanted to spend more time with me and Lord together?"
"I do," she admitted, hurt.
"Then come on."
"No YOU go ahead!" she said in a harsh tone, "And YOU have fun with MY boyfriend!"
"Uhhh…" Fionna wondered, "we're gonna head to the party, but you should meet us there and stop acting weird."
Fionna walked away along with Lord, leaving Cake sighing.
All nostalgic, Cake went through the picture she kept of her, Fionna and Lord. She then look at their timeless clock, it was 11:50.
"They should be back by now!" she thought to herself, dialing the Cloud Kingdom.
"Hello Cloud Kingdom," she heard someone answered.
"Uh, yes, hello. Um, I'm lookin' for Fionna the Human and Lord Monochromicorn," she asked hearing something being thrown, "hello, can you hear me? Hello."
"Yeah, they left a while ago," the voice told her.
"A while ago?!" she asked, bursting a instant later through the front door on her bike, looking around frantically.
She stopped on the hill overlooking Lord's house to find Fionna and him hanging out without her, changing the color of things like she and Lord used to do. Both laughed as a tree lost its colors.
"Now, same for that! And that," Fionna asked, laughing, "wow Lord! Hanging out with you it the best!"
"I like you too Fionna," he confessed.
"Nooo" Cake screamed, falling onto her knees with her arms in the air, oooooo! "My boyfriend... in the arms of my best friend!"
She got mad, picking up her phone.
"Well, TWO can play at that game, sweet cheeks!" she said, scrolling through her contacts, "let's see... "Dory, Tori, Jenna, Denise, Reggie, Petunia, Georgie, Laura, Lucy, Davina, Betsy, Mary R., Mary H., Mary A., Margaret, Jenny, Mrs. International, Mrs. Outrageous, Nurse Majesty, The Flying Lettuce Sisters, Anete the Punk... Tiimothy!"
On the roof, both were still laughing.
"I wish Cake was here having fun with us," Fionna confessed before hearing a viola, "hey, where's that music coming from?"
"Yeah, yeah, louder," Cake was saying, next to a person with pretty short blond hair.
"Cake," Lord gasped, "what are you doing?"
"Oh, hey guys. I'm just sharing a tender moment with my handsome friend Timothy," she explained.
"Stop!" Fionna urged her, "you're making Lord jealous!"
"Well I'm trying to make you both jealous!" she confessed.
"Why would I be jealous of Timothy?" she asked, keepin Lord from interfering.
"Becaaause, Timothy's a girl!" she declared as her new best friend revealed herself as a pretty and tomboy girl.
"Cake's MY best friend now! FOREVER!" she laughed evily.
Fionna snapped, growled and leaped towards Timothy.
"Home wrecker!" she called the short-haired one as she pulled a knife, quickly disarming her. "Cake, what's going on with you?" Lord asked, quite concern.
"I guess I'm just jealous of how much you and Fionna like each other," she sighed.
"I'm hanging out with Fionna because you wanted us to get to know each other better," he pointed out.
"I know," she admitted, lost, "Gaah."
"Get out of my life Timothy!" Fionna said, on top of her, punching her, "and never come back!"
"No! Cake will be mine!" she said, kicking her.
"I'm sorry I'm an idiot sweetheart. Forgive me?" she begged, asking for a hug.
"Oh babe, I love you BECAUSE you're an idiot," he said, hugging her, "you make me feel like a genius!"
"You make me feel like I'm huggin' an old woman," she confessed, laughing, "it's time to get rid of this piece of crud."
She ripped the translator off and threw it onto the ground.
"B-E-T-T-E-R?" he stomped and scratched.
"Yeah! Waaay better!" she confessed with a hug.
Meanwhile, both best friends were ending their fight, Timothy running away.
"Beat it Timothy! Go on! Get!" she yelled.
"You'll never defeat me! I will! Be Cake's best friend! Because I'm Timothyyyy," she shouted, rising her fist before Fionna spit on her head, "Ahhhhhh!"
"I'm sorry I was an idiot," Cake apologized to Fionna, once Timothy was gone, "forgive me?"
"Shut up sis, I don't wanna hear that stuff," she confessed, stepping into the circle made by Lord, "Lemme get in there."
"Let's never be stupid again," she pledged
"Wait! Let's always be stupid! Forever!," Fionna promised as she knew they had decades of stupidity waiting for them.
THE END