An incredibly early update this week, because I'm going away and won't have access to my computer, so I hope you all enjoy this mid-week surprise.

Thanks as always for reading and reviewing. :3


Puppies

The spiralling tiers of True Cross Town cast the city into darkness in the early hours of evening, the setting sun covering what it could reach in soft red light. Rin and Ryuuji walked side by side, each carrying two bags of groceries as they headed home after a long day.

"There's a dragoon teaching position open. I was thinking of applying," Ryuuji said, "it's a lateral move though. Doesn't pay any more, but at least it will get me out from behind my desk more often and the hours should be steady, though I'll probably be bringing more work home. What do you think?"

No answer came. Ryuuji looked up, realizing Rin was no longer beside him, and turned to find Rin a few yards behind, staring into the darkened window of some shop.

"Rin?"

He didn't look up, instead pressing his face closer to the window which turned out to belong to a pet store. The store was closed and the shop was dark. No animals could be seen from outside.

"Can we get a puppy?" He asked.

Ryuuji furrowed his brow and frowned. "Are we moving? Because you know our current place doesn't allow pets." Kuro notwithstanding. Ryuuji didn't normally break the rules, but Kuro wasn't technically a pet, let alone a cat.

Rin snorted and turned away from the window without another word, not bothering to put up a fight. Ryuuji pursed his lips as he watched Rin walk away for a moment, quietly wondering what had brought on that request. Rin hadn't shown much interest in animals before and though Kuro wasn't technically a pet, he seemed to fill the role quite well, showing up for regular meals and affection, though Ryuuji still wasn't sure how he got in and out of their apartment without help, and more importantly, without drawing unwanted attention from their landlord.

Ryuuji shook his head and hurried to catch up.

"Did you hear what I said before? About applying for the teaching position?"

"Yeah… I don't normally like it when you work at home, but it would be nice to get to spend more time together…" Rin opened his mouth as if to say more, but then pursed his lips, looking down at his feet as he walked. "You like kids?" Rin asked.

Ryuuji shrugged. "I can take em' or leave em', but maybe-" he cut himself off, swallowing his words. He'd been about to suggest Rin watch for a teaching position to open up for either tamers or knights, but that… That would be a bad idea. Not Rin teaching—he'd probably be good at it, at dealing with the kids. He liked them—but they both knew he'd never get picked for the job. Better not to even mention it, putting the idea in to his head only to get his hopes up.

Ryuuji coughed, trying to cover his awkward shift in speech. "Kids are okay, but considering what our teachers went through, I imagine it should be easy by comparison. What are the chances of that happening again?"

Rin grunted noncommittally, hesitated, and then deviated away from the path home once more.

"I didn't mean you," Ryuuji said, calling after him, "We all gave them hell. I don't know what it was. It was like the worst possible luck that they ended up with an entire batch of trainees who all had ulterior motives for joining the program."

Rin didn't answer so Ryuuji followed him into what turned out to be a small neighbourhood park; deserted in the twilight hours. Rin put the grocery bags down and then took a seat on one of the swings, his boots crunching hard against the gravel as he kicked off. The creak of the old rusty chains sang loudly as Ryuuji stood by, watching him.

"This…" Ryuuji said, referring to Rin's unnatural silence and the way he sat, head down, eyes forward, "This isn't really about wanting a dog, is it?"

Ryuuji set down the bags he was carrying and took a seat in the swing next to Rin. The old tired rubber conformed to him as he sat, the cold leeching in to his skin through his clothes.

Rin shrugged. "No, but... I thought it might help."

"Help what?"

"Fill the void, you know? You ever think about having kids?"

"I-" Ryuuji blinked and snapped his mouth shut. The conversation had just taken a turn in to unexpectedly serious territory. This was not something they'd ever spoken about before.

"To be honest," he said, scratching the back of his neck as he started off slow, thinking carefully about his words, "I think a small part of me always just assumed it would happen, but I was always so focused on reviving my temple, I never put too much thought in to it."

Rin hummed thoughtfully, pushing himself even higher on the swing.

"I guess I'm kinda' the opposite," Rin said, "When I was really young I thought I'd love to be a dad—like the thought of having another kid just like me to play with, to protect, to teach and help grow. It seemed like a dream come true—but as I got older, and all my teachers hated me, and none of the other parents would let their kids play with me even if they had wanted to, and I dropped out of school... I just... I didn't even think it was an option anymore."

"Rin…"

Damn it. What the hell was he supposed to say? Ryuuji hadn't been exaggerating when he said he'd never thought about it. He honestly had no idea how kids were supposed to fit in to their current lives.

"Lately… I've been thinking-"

"Rin, I don't think it would be a good idea. We're both-"

Rin put his feet out, halting his motion with a loud spray of gravel, and turned to glare at Ryuuji.

"I'm not an idiot. I know we can't make a kid, but that doesn't mean we can't get one."

Ryuuji arched an eyebrow, peering at Rin out of the corner of his eye. "I was going to say we both work dangerous on call jobs with long erratic hours, but the way you said that is a little disconcerting."

Rin sighed, letting his head fall back and gazing up at the darkened sky.

"I don't know what that means, but I'm thinking it's a 'no'."

"It's not a 'no', per se," Ryuuji said, fidgeting, "This just isn't something we can decide in a single conversation, Rin. It's a really important decision. Life changing. We have to both want it."

"Does that mean you don't?" Rin's voice was soft, timid, as if he was afraid of the answer.

Ryuuji sighed and wet his lips, looking anywhere but at Rin as he shrugged helplessly.

"I just… I don't know. Like I said, I haven't thought about it, not seriously, and there's a lot to consider."

"I know," Rin said as he held up his hand and started counting on his fingers, "Both surrogacy and adoption are expensive, we'd need more space, there's paternity leave and our jobs to consider-"

"You'd have to start cleaning up after yourself better," Ryuuji said. Rin turned and stuck his tongue out at him, and Ryuuji cracked a smirk, trying to lighten the mood, but it was obvious that Rin had already put a lot of thought in to this—a lot more than Ryuuji had realized. How long had he been silently thinking about this?

"Come on," Ryuuji said, punching him lightly in the shoulder, "Let's go home, put the groceries away, get dinner started and we can talk about it some more."

"'Kay," Rin said with a sigh, getting up from the swing and trudging over to where he'd left the groceries he'd been carrying. Ryuuji picked up his bags as well and they left the small park together just as the sun moved behind the horizon, giving True Cross Town and its inhabitants over to the soft cool glow of electric lighting.

"But seriously," Ryuuji said, "You're going to have to pick up after yourself more often. I don't need a second child to look after."

Rin's only response was to free up one of his arms by stacking the grocery bags, oblivious to potentially crushing their contents, and then reach over and shove Ryuuji none too gently, sending him dangerously off balance as he tripped off the curb and dropped one of the grocery bags.

Ryuuji caught his balance, sputtering incredulously, and threw his hands up in the universal sign for "what the fuck" as he looked between the groceries as they rolled to a stop in the street and Rin, who was still walking away, his back towards him.

"Real fuckin' mature, Rin!" Ryuuji called after him.

Rin didn't even so much as slow as he turned his head and stuck his tongue out at Ryuuji once more.