CHAPTER NINE – TOBIAS 14, TRIS 12
TOBIAS POV
I walk in the front door from school with Tris and Caleb. Caleb is telling us something funny that happened at school today when we all stop in our tracks. Sitting in the family room with mum and dad is Evelyn. My dead mother.
I can't move I am totally stunned at what I am seeing. How? I went to her funeral. Marcus told me she was dead. Everyone who is in this house right now was at the funeral. Did anyone else know she is alive?
"Tobias," she says.
Her saying my name was the only good thing that I can remember from the life she left me in with Marcus. I just keep staring at her. I open my mouth but there are no words coming out so I close it again. She walks towards me with her arms spread out like she is going to hug me but I take a step backwards and she stops.
"How?" I ask.
"Tobias come and sit down darling. I think this has been a bit of a shock for all of us," mum says. Should I call mum Natalie now? This is all very surreal. All I wanted was for Evelyn to be alive for years. I would pray every night that she would come back and rescue me from that monster. That I could be taken somewhere where I would feel safe and feel the warmth I now feel living with the Priors. I am finding it very hard to take in that she is standing here in front of me.
I sit on the couch and Natalie comes and sits next to me. "It is going to be okay Tobias. Andrew and I are here for you," she whispers in my ear and then puts an arm around my shoulder and pulls me in for a semi hug. I sigh and keep telling myself that no matter what happens here and now that I am safe and I am with people who truly love me.
"Evelyn why don't you tell Tobias what you told us," mum says. I can't think of Evelyn as my mum yet. I don't know if I ever can. Natalie is my mum, she is the one who is here for me, who loves me.
"Tobias I am sorry that you thought I was dead. I didn't know that Marcus was going to tell you that," Evelyn says.
"I thought you would be better off with him than with me, factionless," she says. He started hitting me before she left. How could she have thought I would be better off with a father like that?
"I am trying to see if I can come back to Abnegation, I want to try and make us a family again," she says.
I can't stand to hear another word out of her mouth. She cannot be serious with what she is saying right now. I rise from my position on the couch and I say, "I will never join you. I don't care where you are I will not be with you, ever again. You are not my mother. A real mother would never have left her child with that monster. Evelyn you need to stay away from me."
I walk out of the family room, I then run up the stairs into my bedroom and I see the blue sculpture that she gave me the day before she took off. I pick up the sculpture, I scream at the top of my lungs and throw it across the room and watch it shatter into a million pieces as it hits the wall. I almost laugh at the mess I have made, the sculpture would never be the same again and it now is a good representation of how I feel my relationship with Evelyn is. Broken into too many pieces to ever be fixed.
The noise has both Caleb and Tris running into my room. "I'm okay," I say. "I just need to be alone for awhile."
"Come get me if you need to talk," Tris says and they both leave my room.
I flop down on my bed and there are so many thoughts running through my head. Why would Marcus tell me my mother was dead? How could she just leave me like that? Does Marcus know she wants to come back to Abnegation? Will I have to leave my family? These and so many other things are running through my brain. I can't think straight. I get off the bed and start to pace my room. I know I need to calm down but I just can't.
I hate my parents. That is about the only thing that feels real at the moment. Yep I definitely hate them. Why didn't I get parents like the Priors? I know I have them now but what did I do to have the parents that I have? I lie back down on my bed and I put my pillow over my face and scream again. I hear my door opening but I don't look out from under my pillow to see who it is.
I feel her weight as she sits on my bed and I know it is Tris when she starts to play with my hair. She knows this always calms me when she does that. I lift the pillow off my head and lay my head back down on it. Tris continues to play with my hair.
"I . . .," I try to say something but Tris stops me.
"Don't try to say anything Tobias. Just try and get some rest you have been through enough today," she says.
I just nod my head and close my eyes. I lay here and enjoy the moment because I feel like there are going to be a lot more stressful days coming now that Evelyn has shown her face. I don't know how long I lay here with Tris playing with my hair but I do finally dose off.
I wake and it is dark outside. I don't know what time it is but I do know that I am hungry. I get off my bed and I walk downstairs and I see everyone in the family room. I go and sit on the couch with Tris and Caleb.
"How are you feeling?" mum asks.
"Confused," I say.
"Your dinner is in the oven if you are hungry," she says.
"Thank you," I say as I rise from my seat to go and get my dinner.
I sit at the dining table with my food in front of me and mum comes and sits with me.
"You shouldn't eat alone," she says with the warmest of smiles on her face. So different to the heartless mother I now have trying to get back into my life.
"Tobias I don't know what rights we have. But if you want to stay here with us then we will do everything we can to keep you," she says.
"Thanks," I say. I have so much I want to say to her, to thank her. "I love you," I say as tears start to fall from my face. I feel so weak and childish but I can't help it. I am so scared I am going to be taken away from the people I now call family.
Natalie gets up from her seat and comes and sits next to me. She gives me a hug and says, "I love you too Tobias. We all do."
The dam walls are busted and I am now sobbing onto her shoulder. "Please don't let them take me away," I say.
"We won't darling, we won't," she says.
I wipe my tears and she hands me a tissue to blow my nose. "Eat your dinner, we will talk more about everything tomorrow. But for now I want you to not worry about what is going on outside the walls of this house. Just know that we all love you and we will fight to keep you here with us."
I give her a small smile and return to trying to eat my dinner. While I don't have much appetite my stomach is telling me otherwise as it loudly growls for more food.
I wake up in the morning and I can hear raised voices coming from downstairs. Just then Caleb and Tris come bursting into my room.
"Do you hear that?" Tris asks.
"Bit hard not to," I say.
"Well that is Marcus and Evelyn yelling at each other. Natasha, mum and dad are also there but they can't seem to get a word in. We were downstairs having breakfast when Evelyn arrived. Mum was trying to be nice but I could tell she would have liked to have punched her. Anyway that was all sort of okay when all of a sudden there was loud banging on the front door. Which startled everyone. When dad opened the door a furious looking Marcus was standing there with Natasha behind him. She looked really scared, like she knew Marcus was going to blow up any minute," Caleb says.
"So then Marcus sees that Evelyn really is here and he starts yelling at her. But she tells him to shut it and then starts yelling at him. Yelling about how could he tell you that she was dead and that he was a coward for hitting you. It just went on and on and we were trying to leave the room to come up and see that you were okay but we couldn't get passed all the adults to come up here," Tris says.
"Anyway mum started to calm them down and at least got them to move into the family room and so we made a dash for it. And even before we got our feet on the first step they had started yelling again," Caleb says.
"Do you think we could just sneak out? They could be going at this for hours," I say.
Then the voices start to become loud again. Marcus is telling Evelyn that there is no way that she can come back to Abnegation. That not only will Abnegation not allow it but none of the other factions are going to stand for it either.
Evelyn starts yelling back that she will take me to the factionless sector with her then. That I should be with family. At this stage I have really had enough. So I make the decision to go downstairs and tell them both to leave me alone. But I get to the top of the stairs and I can't move. I am frozen.
"I think everyone needs to calm down here," says dad. "Now Marcus I don't think you can be impartial in this matter so you are going to have to step aside and let the other members of the council deal with this. Evelyn do you really want to put Tobias through any more stress. If you go to the council and ask to be reinstated back into Abnegation then the whole city is going to know what has happened."
"Do you think Tobias would be happy to have your dirty laundry published all over the city? Does he deserve to be put through the ridicule of what has happened here? I don't think he does. He can't live with you Marcus and we all know why that is," dad says.
"I don't understand," Natasha says.
"It isn't your concern Natasha," Marcus says.
"I think she should know," Evelyn says. "Who is she?"
"I'm his wife," Natasha says.
"Well we can't be sure about that," dad says.
A hear a gasp but I'm not sure who it has come from, I would take a guess and think it came from Natasha.
Evelyn starts to laugh and I can also hear someone start to cry. Probably Natasha. I'm not sure, everything is a little chaotic down there and I just sink down and sit on the top step with Tris and Caleb. I don't understand how my life can be so complicated.
"The moment she left she was no longer my wife," Marcus says.
"Well then I will take Tobias and we will live factionless together," Evelyn says.
"Over my dead body," Marcus yells back at Evelyn.
I hear Tris trying to stifle a laugh and I just glare at her. "Tobias you have to think that this is kind of funny. You don't have to worry, mum and dad won't let either one of them take you away. I know you are still in shock that Evelyn is alive but listen to them. They are acting like children. Even if they did try to take you, there is less than two years before you get to choose at your Choosing Ceremony. They will probably still be fighting over you after you have chosen," Tris says.
"That can be arranged," Evelyn says.
And that is when I can't help but laugh along with Tris. They will probably kill each other before a decision is made. Which probably wouldn't be a bad thing for me.
"Alright enough!" mum yells. "I don't care about what you two think is right or wrong here. I don't care that you both want your own way. But if you want to carry on like this then go and do it in someone else's home. I am not going to tolerate this threatening behaviour from either of you. And as for Tobias he is not leaving here. Tobias will be staying here until his choosing day. Then he will make the decision on where he wants to live and with who. Unless he tells me otherwise he is going to be staying here. If he wants to have contact with either of you then I will schedule times. But under no circumstances will I allow him to be alone with either of you," mum says. "Do I make myself clear? I am sure that he will want to be as far from Abnegation as he possibly can be."
I hear mumbled yes's from both Marcus and Evelyn and all I can do is lay back on the floor and think YES! I hear everyone start to say their goodbyes and I am relieved that for now peace has been restored in our home. Hopefully both Evelyn and Marcus will leave me alone.
I am sitting on my bed when mum comes in and sits down next to me.
"I'm sure you heard everything that was said downstairs," she says.
I just nod.
"Tobias I have said it before and I will say it again. I will do everything I can to protect you. But if you ever want to leave that is okay too," she says.
"I don't ever want to leave," I say.
"Well you only have two years until you have to choose. If you want to go to a different faction then that will be your decision and nobody can interfere," she says.
"I don't want to leave my family," I say. "I mean your family not the family I was given but the family who have made me feel welcomed."
"Tobias I don't expect any of my children. Caleb, Beatrice or you to stay. Andrew and I came to Abnegation because it was the right faction for us. And I expect you to all pick the faction that you feel you will be happiest in. You will one day have your own family and no matter where you go we will always and I mean always love you," she says.
"I don't think I will ever have my own family," I say.
"Why would you think that?"
"Look at me. I'm so broken, I even have the scars to prove. Nobody would want to put up with me, I'm not good around other people and I can't even get a good night's sleep because of the nightmares. Who would put up with all of that?"
"Some young woman is going to be very lucky one day that you are in her life. You need to realise that you are a strong young man who is brave, selfless, smart, honest and kind. It won't matter what faction you choose Tobias that faction will be lucky to have you and so will whoever you pick to spend your life with."
"I'm not ready to spend any time with Evelyn. I am still trying to process it all," I say.
"I understand and I think she will too," she says.
"Thank you," I say.
"You are very welcome Tobias," she says as she hugs me. "Now go grab Beatrice and Caleb and we will all go outside for the day. I think we should have a picnic in the meadow today. Brush off all the negativity that has been in this house this morning."
TRIS POV
I am just lying on my bed after dinner. Just thinking about everything that has happened today. I hear a knock on my door and Caleb walks in. He comes over and sits on my bed with me.
"What are you doing Beatrice?" He asks.
"How can one day be so full of such bad things but at the same time have such good things happen?"
"I think we have both so that they can even each other out," Caleb says.
"Do you think he will ever leave?" I ask.
"No. . . well I really hope not," he says.
"Do you think Marcus or Evelyn could take him away? Would they try to do that?" I ask.
"I think they both have too much to lose to try and do that," he says.
"I hope you are right," I say.
"Me too," Caleb says.
We just stay there for a long time not saying anything but I am sure we are both thinking the same thing. Please don't let Tobias be taken away from us.