Author's Note:

*sighs* This world just became a living hell.

First, the bombings in the Boston Marathon.

Russians, I tell you. They still hold the grudge from World War II. Or...whatever war. Never paid much attention for World War II. But my grandpa said he served in the Vietnam War. :l Don't know about that, but he doesn't like talking about it.

I AM WERNER VON BRAUN! I COME FROM GERMANY!

And no, I never burn books. I would rather burn with them. I got at least 90 something books, buddy. Hmmph-Hmmph.

...Or was it some other country? ...I dunno. I'm reading Ray Bradbury Fahrenheit 451 for class. So far, it's pretty good, and I don't know if Guy and Mildred actually did Tier 15 in there. It was a bit hard to read. :/ If you guys read it, would you let me know? :3 Pwease?

Then the Texas plant explosion. One reason why I don't want to be a Chemist. I'm better off being an Astronomer, Secret Agent/Assassin, or a Marine Biologist. I could be a blacksmith... :/ Nah. Won't work out much.

Then, a small little 5-year-old got raped in India. Just...dudes, she was FIVE YEARS OLD! FIVE!

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU DUDES!?

SERIOUSLY!?

IF YOU'RE SO FUCKING HORNY, THAT'S WHAT BARS AND STRIP CLUBS ARE FOR! NOT SWEET, LITTLE FIVE YEAR OLDS THAT JUST SUFFERED A HUGE MASSACRE OF SHOOTINGS, BOMBS OR WHATEVER SHIT THE WORLD DID TO HER LIFE!

And then the Government doesn't do shit but gives the family 37 dollars to drop it.

Hellz nah, I would rather cut the guy's pickle off, then his plums, then his hands, feet, stab him in the heart, stab his eyes and then rip out his heart, burn it, and then walk away.

...

Now, ladies, if any of you are willing to send me a case of knives, I'll be happy. *evil smile*

...Gee, I wonder if I can actually be a secret assassin. *evil smile*

...yes...I'm evil enough.

*evil laughter*

P.S. I can probably tell that we will engage in war soon. And I hate Gangnam Style. How can you listen to that song? I don't like it. :(

P.S.S. ...there was something else I was going to say...I just don't remember. Ah, well.

P.S.S.S. Drake will now be a big character because of his pleading. If I remember. XwX

P.S.S.S.S. If you would like to see a pic of me, go on instagram and look up blazyghosthorror290. :p

Marianne's P.O.V.

Oh. My. Glob. That Henry is so cute.

All mah girlfriends will be so jealous of me.

(I can tell that most of you are reading it in LSP's voice. XD But, no, it's not.)

Soon, John came into the room and looked all around him.

"What the fucking shitheads happened in here?" he asked.

"I dunno, you raper!" I screamed, my face now heating up with anger.

"...what?" he gave a confused look.

"You raped the shit out of PB! Don't you remember!?"

"...first of all, that wasn't me. That was my evil twin, John. I'm Darkstar. See, I have green eyes. John has dark brown eyes that are a shade close to black. Like White's eyes are."

"Don't push it." White stated, and started kissing Rex, who either groaned, moaned, or gave a grunt and melted into it.

Darkstar only stared at her before clearing his throat. "As I was saying...that was my horny, corny evil twin. My mom was a witch back then, so she created an evil twin of me. An evil twin of me that rapes girls and tries to rule any world he can find. I don't know why, but she said that men aren't good forever. ...no wonder she killed at least 12,450,649,697,534,8657 men. She's traveled a lot. That's all I can say."

...

"Uh...o...k?" I said, slightly confused and weirded out.

Darkstar nodded. "Alright. I'm off." he then turned and walked away.

Then Drake walked in with an ice cream cone of vanilla and strawberry ice cream with chocolate syrup.

I pouted and walked over to him. "Where did you get that from?"

"White's brother's wife's sister. She makes good ice cream." he shrugged.

...dunno, don't care.

"...I want some." I pouted.

"Then go get some."

"Bastard."

"Bitchy McGee."

I gasped and slapped the ice cream out of his hand, which splattered to the floor.

"HEY!" he screamed.

I scoffed and smiled.

"That's what you get for calling me a bitch." I grunted and crossed my arms together.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHH!" Jake said. "You got Ice Burned!"

"..."

"..."

Crickets started to chirp.

"AWKWARD!" he said.

I nodded.

"...so...uh...Finn?" I said.

Finn grunted and pulled away from the make-out session to stare at me with a bored look, while Marceline glared at me with red eyes and hissed.

"What?" he said.

"I...I dare you...to...play Card Wars...with Jake and actually win."

Jake gasped and stood up.

"EXCUSE ME?! NO ONE WILL EVER BEAT ME IN CARD WARS!"

"...I highly doubt that."

Jake swiftly turned to Finn and glared at him. "What do you mean?!"

"I mean, I was about to win, until BMO told me to let you win, or you'll never be the same again." Finn shrugged.

"No! I didn't say it like that!" BMO exclaimed.

I rolled my eyes as the three fought over who said what, and I turned to Drake, who was staring at Henry.

"...who's that?" He asked, pointing to Henry, who was leaning on the wall like a badass dude.

I was about to say something, before my girl senses took over: I giggled insanely and began to drool and go into a dream-like state, until Drake slapped me twice.

"SNAP OUT OF THE SEXY DREAMS YOU GIRLS BE HAVING!" he screamed.

I only stood there dazed.

"...wha?"

"..." he then facepalmed.

Drake's P.O.V.

As Finn and Jake walked away, I sighed and walked over to the quiet dude who was just chilling on the wall, leaving Marianne to her daydreams.

"...who are you?" I asked.

"Henry."

"...bad guys are named Henry."

"No. Bad guys are usually named with a B, or has a B, A, or D in their name." He shrugged.

"...ok. I'm Drake."

He nodded.

"REX!" White suddenly shrieked.

"Wha...HOLY FUCKING LANDLORDS OF THE DEVIL!" he screamed.

We both turned around to see Rex screaming and clutching his big belly.

Wait. How did his belly get...? Did he eat a turkey and it grew to a size of a basketball?

"WHAT'S HAPPENING TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEE?!" he screamed.

"...uh...oooooooooooooooooooohhhh..." White bit her lower lip.

"WHAT!?"

"...um...you won't like this..."

"WHAT DO YOU THINK!?"

White only leaned over and slapped him. "STOP SCREAMING!" she screeched.

"...ok..." he then sniffled.

"...now...oh, Glob, Mom and Dad are going to kill me..."

"...why?" Rex asked, sounding very scared.

"...uh...maybe we should wait." she gave a nervous chuckle.

"White...it's kicking...!"

"...yeah, I'm so dead."

"WHY!?"

"...youarepregnantwithmychild." she said in such a speed so fast it sounded like she was talking in a different language, and then turned away.

"...what?!"

Marianne began to squeal in happiness while Marceline began to snicker.

I dropped my mouth open while Henry just stared with wide eyes.

"Wait. That's possible?!" PB screamed.

"Yes. But I'm not telling you how." White shrugged.

"...White...don't you dare ignore me..." Rex stated. "...just tell me what you said..."

"...If I do, you'll kill me."

"White. I royal promise to my inner demon soul that I will not hurt you in any way whatsoever."

I scoffed.

"...Rex...uh...well, it seems that you are pregnant. And I'm the father."

A very scary, awkward moment of silence.

I just wanted to do this. :D

...A few seconds later...

Rex was in blind fury. Like, in serious blind fury.

And to take out that fury, he wanted to suffocate White with his own bare hands.

"OH, GLOB!" White screamed and tried to get away from the beast named Rex.

"I'LL KILL YOU! THEN MURDER YOU!" Rex roared.

"REX, GLOB, I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIEEEEEEE!"

"NOBODY'S NEVER TOO YOUNG OR OLD TO DIE!"

White screamed once again while PB shivered.

We all stood away from the two and just hung by the walls.

"SOMEBODY! HELP ME!" she said.

"Nope." PB scoffed.

Marceline shook her head. "Sorry. Sunlight hurts me, and you're in sunlight."

"I really don't fight, and I don't have a sword with me." Marianne shrugged. "Sorry."

"Too lazy." I said.

"I'll pass." Henry stated.

"FUCK YOU ALL!" White screeched. {=w=''}

"GET. OVER. HERE!" he then grabbed her neck and started throttling her.

"NO! GLOB!"

He then grabbed her arms and pushed them behind her back, pushed her to the floor and really tried his hardest to choke her.

"UGH! AH!"

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU, MURDER YOU, AND THEN FEED YOU TO MY CATS!" he screamed.

"...you have cats?" Marianne whispered.

"You're...choking...me..." White rasped lowly, her eyes slowly closing.

"GOOD! IT LET'S ME KNOW HOW CLOSE YOU ARE TO DEATH!"

"...Gloooooo..." White then fell limp.

"YES! THE BITCH IS DEAD!" he screamed in triumph and ran away.

We were all like: O-0 0-O

"...What the fuck was all about?" I asked.

After a few seconds, Rex came running back with black tears down his face.

"OH, shit! White, I'm so sorry I strangled you! Please forgive me!" he then bawled into tears.

I only facepalmed while the girls snickered.

This is pretty embarrassing watching Rex cry.

"Uh...Rex...do you have mascara on?" Marceline questioned.

"Yes! Yes, I motherfucking do, bitch!"

Marceline only stared at him before backing away into a corner.

"Shiiiiiit...shit...oh, Glob, why did you make my demon murder her?!" he screamed. "Fucking assholes!"

We all slowly backed away.

Jake then came back bawling, while Finn walked back in and just stared at Jake, who was now punching at Rex.

"AH! Get off me, ass!" he then punched Jake in the face.

"JAKE!" Finn screamed, but didn't move. "...you deserved that. You baby."

Marceline snorted.

"You cheated! We're no longer brothers!" Jake cried.

Finn was like: :l

"...ok." he then turned and walked away with BMO.

"NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jake screamed at the top of his lungs, and fell to his knees crying.

I only shook my head.

"Well. This has gotten more pitiful." Henry said.

"Rex. If you don't stop crying over me like a bitch, then I won't have to kick your ass." someone mumbled.

"...W...White? Whitey?"

"Yes. Now get your sexy ass up." she stated lowly.

He then sniffled and stood up.

White jumped up and cracked her knuckles and shook her arms.

"Sorry." Rex mumbled.

"It's ok." White said sweetly, lifted her fist, and punched Rex right in the face, and he landed on the floor unconscious.

"KNOCKOUT!" I screamed with a smile on my face.

"Sure you're sorry. I'll take your apology in Hell!" she screamed and walked away.

"...damn. Wow, Rex..." Henry said, shaking his head.

"...you're hawt." Marianne squealed.

"What?" Henry looked at her.

"Nothing!" she looked away.

"...weird people these days." he shook his head.

"Tell me about it." I said.