There were times when Envy would vanish without notice, although Kimblee was never left wondering for long where the homunculus had gone or what it was doing. During each of Envy's absences, there was usually a notable instance in the news involving Ishbalan terrorists, criminals and insurgents. Usually just one, although there were sometimes accomplices. It got to the point where, upon Envy's disappearance, Kimblee would make a bet with himself as to the number of days before the latest story broke. Stoke the flames of hatred, Envy had said to him. Sooner or later the fire will spread.

It was spreading alright. From what Kimblee overheard, many of his fellow Amestrians seemed to hold the opinion that Ishbalans were violent, treacherous heathens good for nothing but spilling blood. Kimblee could only watch in fascination as Envy spun its web.

"You're becoming quite the national celebrity." He murmured to Envy one night as they lay in bed, listening to the radio recounting a story on an Ishbalan who had held seven hostages in a church for days. In the end he had killed them all, before turning the gun on himself.

"Dunno what you're talking about." The sin purred, curling just a bit closer to him. "Those Ishbalans...what will the Führer do about them?"

.

One night while Envy was away, Kimblee came home to find Greed lying on his couch smoking a cigar.

Dear god, it's like I've married into the mafia.

"Hello…"

"Our bet still on?" Greed said, sitting up and cutting right to the chase.

"I never called it off." Kimblee said, shrugging of his military jacket and hanging it on the rack by door. "Although I can't imagine Envy agreeing to any such thing." He deposited his hat on top of it.

"Let me worry about that. Your agreement is all I need at the moment."

"You have it, on one condition."

"And that is?"

"Be respectful about it. Don't do anything to Envy that I wouldn't."

"Didn't you blow Envy up like five times the night you met?"

"Eight. But that was before we were involved. With individuals as murderous as ourselves, intimacy and violence are a truly complicated mixture."

"It doesn't get more complicated than this, my friend." Greed said, exhaling a long coil of smoke.

"Another good reason not to complicate it further."

"Point taken. I'll placate the Leviathan as best I can."

"You could start by not referring to Envy as such."

"Would you prefer 'Invidia'?"

"Why not ask Envy what it prefers? It would be a good ice-breaker."

"Much obliged for the advice, but leave the ice-breaking to me." Greed stood up and made his way towards the door.

"Leaving so soon?"

"I need to formulate my plan of attack." He grinned as he drew level with Kimblee in the entryway. "Kiss for luck?"

Kimblee kissed his index and middle finger, then reached out and pressed them to Greed's lips.

Greed snorted. "What kind of luck is that?"

"Consider it a down payment."

Greed laughed. As he brushed past Kimblee in the doorway, his hand shot out, quick as a snake, and slapped the alchemist firmly on the ass.

"Now that's the kind of luck I'm talking about." He said as he shut the door behind him.

.

(A/N: Consider this chapter my down payment, as there might not be another one for a while. I moved recently, and haven't managed to get internet in my new place (RAGE! DX). I wrote and posted this from another computer, but that strategy is ill-adapted to longer, more, *ahem* involved sequences. So while I am working on the rest of the story at home, I have no way of getting what I write from my computer to the internet for the time being. Just so y'all know I haven't forgotten you. This story and it's readers still mean the world to me! ^_^

Also, for the people who have read and enjoyed both Many Kinds of Monsters and The Untold Story (I think there is at least one of you...) you may get a kick out of Mergoat's "A Wizard Walks Into a Bar" crossover fic. It was a just-for-fun IM with a very good friend, and he went ahead and posted it for the lullz. It still need some serious editing, but it may amuse you while I get my basted internet problems sorted out. Thanks for reading!)