Getting home took a while. That's really the only bad thing about living out in the outskirts of the city, it's a long walk home. I usually never stray that far into the interior; not only are there far too many humans for my liking, but there are plenty more cats living in the area. I might have mentioned them before, but you should know that in the world of the humans, every cat is on their own. Everything is a competition for food and survival, to some cats life is only a game. You can't trust anyone. I learned that the hard way.
By the time I finally made it to my building, the rain had already set deep within my fur- which is just fantastic, I'll let you know. It takes about five times as long to clean it when it becomes matted and disgusting, not that my pelt wasn't dirty enough to begin with.
The building itself is abandoned. I don't think a human has visited the place for moons; it's quiet and I have it all to myself, just the way it should be.
I enter through the small broken window at its base; it's still the only way to get in and out of the building since I first came across it.
Home.
Thankful to be out from under the swirling gray sky and chilly wind, I was able to shake my fur off in the new, dry environment and chose a comfortable spot on the ground, pulling some old food out from my personal store. But I really didn't feel like eating. I didn't even bother to take care of my damp pelt and the new matts that were likely forming beneath.
For hours I simply laid there, staring into the dark, listening to the sound of rain; I didn't particularly feel like doing anything else. At some point I must have fallen asleep though, because when I woke up, it was suddenly lighter. New light meant a new day, and a new day meant that it was time to go and see what food I could manage to find.
Squeezing through the small window space was easy. That's the nice thing about the building I live in, it has plenty of space and I don't have to crouch down all the time inside, but that's it. The cats living around here are all mangy, flea-bitten rats; and we already have enough of those around here.
I hate rats.
The broken window that I use as an entrance to my home leads to a pretty big alleyway on the side of the building. There's a lot of human trash there for sure, but there aren't any dumpsters or cans around. It's because the humans don't come over here much; the most I see of them is when their transporters zip by on the street. To get to any sort of food, I would have to go a bit deeper into the city. You have to be careful there. Not only because of dogs and humans, but because of the gangs that take up their territories around the interior- their blocks. They're mainly large, competing family groups of cats, and they don't take kindly to outsiders venturing into their territory. Unfortunately, their territories are exactly where all the food is.
How about that?
-And just because I can afford to get killed doesn't make it any more of a pleasant experience, yeah?
The rest of us city cats have to survive by gathering scraps outside of their territories.
Not that it matters much.
Since the deal, I haven't come across many of the cats he was talking about at all. There was one. At first, after the dream. I had trouble believing any of it had actually happened, I had only now begun to realize what I was, and what I was doing.
When I came back to life that day, after eating the poison, I woke in an unfamiliar place with two cats standing over me.
"I think she's awake!" A voice called. My vision was blurry, but the foggy outline of a cat was starting coming through. She was standing over me, peering down with wide, curious, brown eyes. The tabby she-cat blinked twice and turned to what I assumed was her companion. The sound of pawsteps shuffling over wasn't hard to miss as he too came to my side.
The she-cat moved back as the tom arrived, looking me over with great interest. "It's good to see you're awake. Are you feeling okay?"
I said nothing, still attempting to process what had happened.
Had it all been a dream?
"You're on block thirty, beneath the old parking garage. I'm Bo," He paused for a moment. "What's your name?"
"...Roxanne."
"Well, Roxanne, you are the luckiest cat I've ever met," Bo meowed, shaking his head. "That was rat poison. Not so many cats can walk away from that, but we've looked you over and you seem absolutely fine. It's incredible, you have no idea how lucky you are!"
I've always had the worst of luck, actually.
"We?" I muttered dully. I honestly didn't feel like dealing with other cats at the moment. My entire body felt heavy, and memories of the dream were still ripe in my mind.
"Yes, our group found you. One of the other cats should be here to take care of you for a little bit, you should rest."
I was confused more than anything. At that point I'm pretty sure I had almost entirely lost track of reality. The tom escaped my vision and the sound of pawsteps drummed through my head. Sleep was trying to take me, but I was fighting it as best I could. Block thirty. Block thirty... Where was block thirty again?
I was zoning in and out, barely able to keep my eyes open as the world slowly began to fade to black.
What was happening?
The world went black, and it wasn't until later that I would wake up again. The sound of several small noises woke me from my sleep, and as I blinked myself awake, I recognized the she-cat from before. Our eyes connected for a moment, and she merely blinked at me before coming over to where I lay.
"I'm sorry, did I wake you up? I'm just here to check on you for the others. I'm Clara by the way. You probably want to go home. I don't blame you, I hate this place, but where else can I go right? They just want to make sure you're feeling well enough to go home."
A small hunk of meat was placed at my side, likely found in a nearby human building or the garbage. It was at that point that I was reminded of where I was. Block thirty. It was all the way on the other side of the city from my home. How did I get there?
"Well, anyway," Clara meowed amiably, running a paw over one ear. "I know you're probably sick of hearing this, but you're so lucky. It's crazy! You doing what you did, and her walking by and seeing what she saw- That was a lucky chance."
Yeah, just my luck. I didn't respond to the tabby she-cat for a while. I thought she would get the hint, but apparently this wasn't the case.
Clara moved away for a moment and returned with some food of her own she had set aside and settled down beside me. "They make me do all the grunt work here," She muttered moodily, pawing at her food. "I tell ya, one day I'm going to tell them what I really think! I swear I will!"
An awkward silence fell over the two of us as I continued to stare at the concrete ceiling. She took a few bites of her food, but after she made a large swallow she suddenly paused. I think she was starting to get the message. She got back onto her paws and began to pad away, stopping to look back.
"Just wanted to say you're lucky, and... I hope that you've changed your mind about some things. I have to go now, but I'll see you later, okay?"
I had been ignoring her for most of the time, but what she said made me glance her way before she disappeared through a hole in the wall.
What could she possibly know?
The sound of a strange scratching noise woke me from my sleep, but there was no one else in the room, only me. I started to pull myself up, but my legs nearly crumpled beneath me. I never realized how utterly exhausted I was. It was frustrating. Before I could try again, the noise resonated once more all around. My breath hitched in my throat. I didn't want to admit it to myself then, but I was afraid.
The noises grew louder and louder, but I saw nothing in the room. Not from behind, above, ahead, or to the side. Before I knew it, the noises were upon me and darkness fell over the area like a shroud. Unknown figures in the dark struck out against me, tearing away at my body. I was unable to struggle against them as they pulled at my limbs and mutilated my body. Flesh searing with pain, I tried to yell, but no words left my parted jaws. A strong grip came over my limbs and began to pull, stretching my body apart.
My heart nearly stopped in my chest and my body had gone completely cold, it took me a few minutes to realize that I was still in the room and Clara, the she-cat from earlier, was watching me only a few feet away.
"Bad dream?"
I allowed myself the time to breathe for a moment in an effort to calm my body down and placate my fried nerves.
"Yeah, you could say that. A really bad one..." It felt like my paws were shaking, but looking down I noticed they were as still as ever.
"I knew it! I knew you were having a bad dream the moment I walked in. What was it about?"
I could hear the whistle of wind coming from outside of the garage and through the small gaps and holes here and there; it made the area cold. Glancing outside one of the openings above, I could see the sky, gray and cloudy as ever. My skin prickled at the very thought of the nightmare.
"I was getting torn apart..."
Clara hardly seemed affected by the prospect at all, staring at me as if it was a common thing to dream of- That or maybe she was used to listening to the nightmares of other people. She made a small humming noise for a moment and flicked her tail.
"Actually that reminds me of something I heard not too long ago. There was a cat living around here who went to find food in Block Twenty-Two- we told her not to go, but she wouldn't listen! Got ripped apart by dogs, poor thing. That's why you have to be careful in the city, these cats who come in from other places just don't seem to understand that."
"..."
"Sorry, I guess you didn't need to know that, did you?" Clara meowed awkwardly, shooting an apologetic glance my way before shaking her head in frustration. "There I go again, me and my big mouth. I never know when to shut up."
I didn't care much at the moment, I was still just trying to piece everything together. So far no one had told me anything, and I hadn't seen that tom from before- Bo- anytime afterwards.
"What happened to me?"
"What do you remember?" Clara returned, sidling up beside me.
"I remember... eating the poison. I remember the alley blurring around me, and I remember the feeling of the world suddenly starting to slow down, and the sound of the transporters and city fading away. I felt so calm..." Memories of the dream began to return, clear in my mind like the starless sky.
"And then I woke up in a forest... It was dark and foggy, there was no light, and no stars. At first I was happy to explore the forest, I was free, but it soon got worse, and I got lost in the woods. Everywhere I went, I kept finding bodies, my dead body. Floating in the water, hanging off the branch of a tree; I eventually came across a small clearing, and there was a strange cat waiting for me there. I think he was Death... I'm not sure. He never told me his name. He said I should go back, gave me another chance; and so, here I am... Strange dream, huh?"
"Maybe it wasn't a dream," Clara offered seriously.
"It felt real, but it was just a dream." I was less concerned with the dream and more concerned with how I had wound up in Block Thirty of all places. "Can you tell me what happened, and who found me?"
"I don't know. I wasn't there, but when they brought you here it looked like you'd passed out or something, like a coma. You're lucky she came looking for you and found you when she did, otherwise who knows what would've happened."
"Wait. Who found me?"
Clara blinked incredulously. "Your daughter of course! She called for help. If it wasn't for her you'd be dead right now."
"My...daughter?"
The cold feeling from earlier made itself present within me once more.
"Yeah, why?" She asked, waving her striped tail curiously. Her gaze suddenly became more concerned. "Roxanne, why do you look so sick all of a sudden?"
"I don't have a daughter." The words left a dry feeling in my mouth, about a dozen new questions had now surfaced in my mind on top of everything else. "Whoever that she-cat was, she lied."
"But why would she do that?"
"How should I know?" The words left my mouth with added venom. "I was in a coma, apparently!"
"So she lied," Clara returned evenly. "It doesn't change the fact that that she-cat saved your life."
"I was fine! I didn't ask for any help!"
Clara was taken aback by my sharp hiss, choosing to remain silent for a long moment before meeting my eyes.
"Sorry," I meowed. I hadn't meant to lash out at her. "When do you think I'll be able to go home?" My voice was hopeful; I didn't like unfamiliar places, the sooner I could get home the better.
"Probably not today, maybe tomorrow depending on how you're feeling. Prissy took a look at you, and she's good with these kinds of things." Clara paused for a moment to glance behind her at the hole in the concrete wall, rotating her ears to listen for the sound of approaching pawsteps. "Look, I should probably warn you, there's this cat here, they call him X. He's like our leader of sorts, he'll want to make sure you're okay before you go, and you won't be able to until he's talked to you, and he...he's really good at getting into your head. Know what I mean? He'll ask you a lot of questions," Clara's tone sudden shifted from serious to happy in a matter of seconds. "But he's a really great tom!" she purred. "You should trust him."
"X?" That was an odd name for a cat, was it short for something? I couldn't help but wonder.
"Yeah, I think he came up with it himself. I personally really like him, but you hear all sorts of stories floating around. I try not to pay them any mind. All I know is, most cats would turn you away, but X has been nothing but kind and friendly and supportive. He's a great leader! Most cats don't even pay you any attention, but X always stops and asks how I am. He knows that I don't like it here."
"What do cats say about him?"
"Oh, that," Clara rolled her eyes. "They say he's a big flirt, doesn't care as long as they're female. One she-cat, Sugar, someone said they were going to be mates, but she supposedly ran away as soon as she as expecting kits. Couldn't take the rough life. She had previously been a housecat, mind you. Stupid girl." Clara snorted and pushed away a small bit of rubble at her paws. "She left and we never saw her again. I guess he'll be more careful from now on, but I can't really say anything bad about him personally. Although..." Clara trailed off, meeting my eyes for a second.
"Maybe one thing. Don't laugh okay? He's got a weird...smell," she mused.
"What do you mean?"
"He just smells...funny? I don't know, maybe he doesn't like bathing on a regular basis."
"Oh," I responded.
"Thanks for the warning. I'll try not to get too close to him." Clara could sense the sarcasm in my voice, but merely chose to ignore it.
"Now that I think about it...there's something else too. I'll tell you this, Roxanne. Once he starts talking to you, you just sort of open up. It's really weird! I'm not normally one to hide things, but he got some really private stuff out of me."
"So, what about you? Why are you here anyway?" I meowed, trying to keep up some sort of conversation so I wouldn't fall victim to boredom. This she-cat sure liked to talk a lot; she seemed really insecure.
"Me? I'm nobody, just another cat trying to survive in this dump. We all have to find our way somehow, right? I help the group out and they let me stay here. There are two other she-cats here as well. One of them is always sick, her coughing is disgusting! I think its because she's got a hairball stuck in her throat that just won't budge; she's always licking herself, so it wouldn't surprise me. I can never get any sleep at night. And the other," Clara paused to screw up her face in a rude manner. "Well let's just say she isn't exactly a ray of sunshine. I'm pretty sure she has a mate in one of the gangs around here; she's always sneaking these little round human treats off to him. I used to have a mate. I tried to give him some once, but he didn't like it much. He didn't like me much either. He left some time ago, and on my birthday too. Of all days, right? He never told me why- But I don't care anymore. He was always complaining about one thing or another anyway."
"I'm tired."
The bland statement stopped her in the midst of her ramblings and seemed to pull her back into reality.
"Okay, I get the hint. I'll go now, just be careful Roxanne, they'll be watching you," she added, looking back toward the hole to which I could only assume more members of the group resided.
"How do I know you're not one of 'them'?" I muttered inquisitively, challenging Clara with one of many emotionless stares.
"You don't, but come on. Do I look like a bad cat to you?"
"I guess not..."
What do bad cats really look like anyway? They're really no different from any of us, that's the scariest part...
"I'll see you later with some more food, and remember what I said, dreams are just dreams."
Clara turned and padded away toward the hole, before stopping to look back with a supportive smile. "But when they turn into nightmares, it's good to have someone there to wake you up, right?"