Level Pair; Day Nine 2/4
I drag myself out of nightmares each morning and find there's no relief in waking. ~Suzanne Collins
Shouyou idly chatters with Noya, but he's dead-tired.
Kageyama never returned last night. Instead, Daichi had told him he was being held for observation. It had left him restless all night despite the mass of people who'd surrounded him. Momma Yu had finally gone home this morning, Tanaka and Asahi had stepped out not long ago to go find some lunch, and Daichi had been summoned by the Grand King around mid morning.
He sits with his brother and Sugawara, doing his best to keep his bright smile, but mentally willing the hours to lapse faster. He wants to see Kageyama, wants to know he's okay. The black-haired boy had woken with a vicious hiss and a start yesterday when Asahi had reached for him, and Shouyou had instantly recognized the grip of a nightmare… because he'd had them, too.
Since Kageyama hadn't really displayed any reactions like that while they were away from the rookery, Shouyou had wondered if he really hadn't been affected by the attack. But seeing it here where they were safe and sound… Shouyou had been left to conclude that Kageyama'd simply not allowed himself to really consider the situation while they were still in immediate danger. Once he'd let his guard down here, the backlash had finally surfaced.
A yawn escapes around his latest story and Noya fixes him with a look. Of everyone, Shouyou is probably closest to Noya, but the crow has positively hovered over him since he'd gotten back. Honestly, it was worse than their mom. Shouyou finds it slightly amusing, but tiring; Noya is reacting as any sibling would. He apparently even lost his temper with the Grand King while they were gone. Heh. Shouyou would have paid money to see that and is sorry he missed it.
"Are you feeling alright Shou?" He asks. The redhead nods with a small smile.
"Yeah, just getting tired. And I'm hungry." He says and Noya glances to the door. He grumbles something about Asahi and Tanaka getting lost to himself before looking back at him.
"Those two should have been back with lunch by now. I'll go find them." He says and he's out the door before Shouyou can protest. He doesn't mind, though. The redhead leans back and draws in a deep breath before looking over at Suga with a dull gaze.
"Hey Suga?" He asks softly and the thrush's grey eyes fall on him benignly.
"What's up?"
The question is complimented with a friendly smile that reaches into his eyes and it makes Shouyou slouch, his pent muscles relaxing. The thrush is soft spoken and level headed and easily the most laid back of them all.
He was probably one of the last people Shouyou'd have pegged to have a competitive drive when he'd first met him a few years ago, but that desire burned just as surely in him as it did in Tanaka who was probably their loudest individual. It had been slightly unnerving when they'd first played Volley with him, honestly. He'd grown up on the edges of the rookery but still knew how to play, and he'd proved to have a rather disturbingly tenacious side to him while on the field. The fact that he always remained upbeat and chill even so— as if lost points or mistakes didn't matter— was all the more a personality contradiction. Shouyou knew it had frequently set Kageyama's teeth on edge.
But it had been through him that Kageyama had had the opportunity to take a step back from his setter position and actually learn the game more fully, his own attacks finally manifesting with as much precision as everything else he did. Not only that but with the thrush's calm personality balancing out the frequent excess of exuberance on their team, there had been significantly fewer altercations between them. He was a master at diffusing tense situations and probably the easiest to talk to or seek advice from on anything really.
Perhaps it's that or maybe it's because he is a lot like Shouyou and keeps his attitude bright in the face of adversity that the redhead drops his in front of him now. He can't explain it, but he feels safe in letting it fall, revealing his turmoil to the thrush.
"Is it wrong to think that maybe I shouldn't have come back?" He asks, his voice sounding miserable even to himself.
Suga's smile falters slightly with surprise before he leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees with contemplation. When his grey eyes meet Shouyou's again, they are kind yet tinged with sadness.
"No, Hinata. Everyone questions decisions they've made and it's not an evil to wonder if they were the right ones... but if you are concerned about it, know that every one of us wants you here." He says and Shouyou can't help the wry grin that twists his mouth.
"Yeah. I can tell you guys are happy we made it back. And your concern is touching. You're making sure someone familiar is always with me... don't get me wrong— it helps, though I haven't even been able to go to the bathroom without someone trailing after me like a pup." He murmurs with a touch of amusement and Suga leans in just a little more.
"But…?" The thrush prompts. Shouyou glances away.
"I know I'm the one who's grounded, but I wish Kageyama had the same support." He says quietly before looking back up at him. "You weren't here yesterday. Asahi hasn't said anything, but Kageyama almost laid into him before he realized where he was when he woke him up. I've been surrounded by people who care about me since returning, but he's probably been pulled away on his own and cornered by the Grand King any number of times by now and that jerk knows nothing about Kageyama except how to find his weak points and coerce him."
Kageyama's father has ever been a brilliant strategist, using anything and everything at his disposal to achieve a goal. His propensity to accurately gauge a situation and craft a solution had been the largest draw to other crows and avians. He was careful and precise, with every move calculated after every outcome had been considered, something Kageyama came by honestly. During the rookery's rise to notoriety, Tooru hadn't usually entered confrontations or skirmishes he knew they might lose, and had frequently and skillfully negotiated territorial disputes. That wasn't to say that they hadn't run into tensions with other clans, but the promise that their warriors would come home at the end of the day was appealing. His systematic planning and structure combined with his uncanny ability to control interactions offered a security many found reassuring and his followers had quickly swelled in number.
His single greatest strength was his ability to analyze people with terrifying results. He could determine his own sentries' capabilities and had hand placed most of them into units to maximize their strengths while still keeping them perfectly balanced with one another. He could pick out those with the very best latent talent, could coax and train it to the surface, and could adeptly construct specialized units for unique missions. He could read people and deliver motivation for any type to get the most from his minions.
His eyes also missed no weakness either, and this was the true power behind his capability in dealing with an opponent. He could determine what unbalanced an adversary or what they wanted, could play that to his benefit. He could decipher the only chink in an impermeable defense and exploit it. Hell, Shouyou was pretty sure the last time they'd seen it in action, the Grand King had actually turned the opposing clan's own advantage against them. It was his best weapon against curbing internal dissension as well, and the redhead had seen it used— albeit rarely— on his own sentries. More often, it was one of Tooru's favorite games to play with Kageyama anytime they butted heads; he is sure the heir apparent is facing it once again.
Shouyou frowns. Even if Tooru could analyze people to the letter, that didn't mean he understood them… that or he simply didn't care.
"I'm not an idiot and I'm aware that my being here exponentially increases the external pressure on him, and the Grand King will know and use that." He says with a touch of sharpness before finding a corner of the room to focus on.
"I know he probably seems like it's not getting to him, but he went through all this, too, Suga… he's not the same since before the attack, and I can't help but feel like he's going to do something stupid if someone isn't there to help put on the brakes." The redhead says uneasily.
Suga reaches out and grasps his shoulder. The touch is comforting, but it's not the crow's he wants to feel right now.
"I know it's not much, but he hasn't been completely alone. Daichi was supposed to see him again this morning—"
A commotion outside echoes down the hall and into the room and Suga goes silent. Shouyou recognizes both Tanaka's and Noya's voices and knows their time for this sober conversation is about up.
"I hope it's enough." The redhead says quietly before carefully reconstructing his easy facade.
But it cracks slightly when the two loud crows walk in followed by both Asahi and Daichi. Well so much for the unit leader being with Kageyama. Still, he can't keep from jumping at the chance for news of him.
"Did you get to see him Daichi?" He asks immediately. Daichi looks at him like he's just been caught skipping drills and Shouyou's gut sinks.
Something's already happened.
The larger crow glances away from him and Tanaka and Noya go silent as they feel the mood drop.
"He's… doing alright." He says and Shouyou frowns, his first real one in the last two days.
"You're lying."
Daichi watches him for a long moment before meeting Suga's pinched face beside him with a deep look.
"Can you make sure Noya's mom will come tonight? I think the rest of us are going to be held up." He says heavily and takes a seat beside them. He leans forward, supporting himself on his arms with elbows on his knees like Suga had earlier, and runs his hands over his face.
"Daichi." Shouyou says, his voice sounding horribly neutral even to himself, "What's going on?"
The large crow draws in a deep breath before meeting his gaze.
"Kageyama challenged the Grand King and secured an opportunity to fight for you to stay." He says and it seems like it should be cause for relief, but the tightness around Daichi's jaw is doing nothing but sending Shouyou's heart rate skyward.
"What did he do?" He asks woodenly. Daichi glances from one face to another before coming back to him. And then it drops to his hands.
"We have a Volley death match against the Grand King. We play at six on the south center field." He says and everyone misses Shouyou go pale. "If we win, Hinata can stay as he chooses. If we lose…" He continues before trailing away, still focused on the white knuckled grip of his hands in front of him. The breath rushes out of Shouyou's lungs.
"He can't!" The words escape him with a measure of desperation and everyone turns to stare at him. "Kageyama can't play!"
A tense moment of silence pulses in his ears before Tanaka breaks it.
"Eh? He has to. He issued the challenge. Suga can relieve him now and then, but—"
"I'm grounded, you moron!" Shouyou explodes at him, cheerful happy mask utterly forgotten. "Suga will be my relief… permanently. There are only six of you again so he doesn't have a relief for himself anymore! But it doesn't matter because he can't play!"
"Calm down, Hinata. Talk to us." Suga says with an uncommon note of authority and a hand gripping his shoulder. He catches Shouyou's gaze with luminous focus. "Why can't he play?"
Shouyou feels his chest tighten.
"Because he's injured!"
Silence. Five pairs of eyes stare back at him and he can tell he's on the verge of losing what little composure he still has.
"What do you mean by injured, Hinata?" Daichi asks finally.
"His wing is sprained! He didn't leave the ground for five days after we were attacked. He still can't fly very well! It's definitely not Volley game ready!"
And as the seconds tick by, he can see the dawning horror on their faces.
"He didn't say anything about it, though." Noya points out tentatively and Shouyou can't keep from rolling his eyes.
"It's Kageyama. I had to corner him on it before he even admitted that something was legitimately wrong."
There's another pause before Daichi lets out a leaded sigh and everyone glances at where he's still seated with his head bowed. He looks up at them, a pained expression crossing his brow.
"I don't think Kageyama is concerned for himself at all at this point." He murmurs before he looks back to his hands, frustration clouding his gaze. "I wasn't sure if I should tell you guys, but I wouldn't be surprised if the Grand King tries to throw us off with it later so I will. Our unit was facing disbandment. Rather than let us be dispersed to other units, Kageyama bought this match for Hinata along with keeping our unit together by agreeing to leave it. Win or lose, Kageyama will be under the Grand King's direct command after this match is over."
Once more, tense silence settles with suffocating pressure. The redhead can barely breath around the constriction in his chest and he doesn't even notice the others' dismay at this new information. Shouyou feels his world tilt and his eyes drop to the floor.
Kageyama… what are you doing?
The redhead can't keep the angry tears from welling and they finally break.
"Stupid Kageyama… after all this time, you think you're still alone? Why are you making all these decisions on your own?" He asks rhetorically to no one.
"I think… I think he knows. He's drawing on the strength of all of us to fight for you because he knows he'll never succeed if it's just him." It's Asahi who answers in a timid voice.
"And he's the only one who could have negotiated something like that with the Grand King." Noya points out.
"But he won't even be able to compete really. He's just going to end up hurting himself worse and then be stuck at his father's mercy on top of it." Shouyou's voice cracks.
"I don't think there is anything that will stop him from playing, Hinata. He will do better with your support rather than your concern at this point." Suga says softly, reminding him of what they'd just spoken about moments before everyone had returned. Another tear escapes but he doesn't notice as the thrush's words sink in.
His support.
Kageyama had been pulling for all of them from for a while now and no one realized it. He had been supporting Shouyou and the rest of their unit in invisible silence. The implications are terrifying for Shouyou. He'd never realized how strong their ties had grown and how much the other crow was willing to sacrifice for them.
Shouyou wonders briefly if he's been blinded by his own pain and crushing reality to not have noticed. And yet… this has to have begun long before the attack, because this depth of attachment isn't born overnight. It's a harrowing moment when Shouyou realizes it's probably been there for centuries... the events of the last week are simply forcing it to the surface.
How had he missed this?
His heart squeezes painfully when he considers how this must be affecting Kageyama. He is trading everything he cares about, everything he identifies with as part of their unit… to keep them safe. It's a disturbing parallel to his own situation and everything he stands to lose as well. He looks back up at Suga who watches him with an unusually critical focus.
"Okay." He manages finally with a half nod. "But I want to be there."
Daichi looks up with a frown.
"You being there might trip his focus." He says apologetically.
"He can go if he stays out of sight, Daichi." Noya says with a frown.
"Yeah, if he can keep himself quiet, it shouldn't be an issue." Tanaka agrees.
"If there is a crowd, it will be easy to mask him somewhere in it." Asahi says thoughtfully.
Daichi looks around at them, indecision etched around his eyes.
"There were enough people in that room that I'm sure most of the units on site know about it…" Daichi hedges and his hand moves to the back of his neck and he looks at Suga imploringly. The thrush merely smiles.
"Your call, Captain."
Daichi's head drops back down with a heavy sigh and Shouyou knows he's going to get his way. Despite the stress multiplying in his gut, he momentarily grins at his small victory.
A/N: This chap annoyed me; the next one is worse and has been completely uncooperative and I've put it in time-out for the moment. There are a couple chapters I'm still revising and hashing out- this one had like 3 rewrites on it and the next has probably gone through 7 (let's face it, it's still making my eye twitch and I will probably do 2 more on it tonight yet), but I will try to have them all straightened out and post ready for their designated days. Oh... and total chapter count will be more than 25. I think I'm looking at 30, all said and done. Maybe more. If I feel like it.
Eh, have an awesome night, you guys.