Chapter Nine-Collide

I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide

"Collide" by Howie Day

Paul hummed loudly as he prepared the boxed macaroni and cheese. We had dressed after our shower and then Paul's stomach had declared itself. I curled my hands around a mug of tea and watched him through slightly lowered eyes. His shirt hung open, the top button of his pants casually left open; bronze skin and tight muscles glowing in the muted light of the kitchen. He glanced up briefly to give me a smile before returning his attention back to the measuring cup he was holding. The man was definitely beautiful and his reputation as the sex god of La Push was well deserved from what I could tell.

Paul and I had been friends long enough for me to know that he wouldn't spend the night with any of his "girls" as he called them. So why had he stayed the night with me? Because we were friends? And why the hell was he standing calmly in my kitchen making macaroni and cheese when his ass would normally be halfway to Canada by now? I jumped slightly when he placed a small bowl of the finished product on the coffee table in front of me.

"Sorry," he said. "Thought you saw me heading over."

"Why are you here?" I blurted out suddenly. He rolled his eyes.

"You do remember what just happened right?" He asked.

"You never stay the night with anyone you have sex with," I pointed out. He dug his fork into the macaroni.

"Yeah well they aren't you," he pointed out just as bluntly. "I've never slept with anyone I considered a friend before. I wasn't aware I had a certain protocol."

"I just don't want you to think you have to stay," I protested. He put his bowl down.

"Jesus do you want me to leave?" He asked.

"No!" I blurted out without thinking again.

"Then relax, eat your damn macaroni and stop staring at me like a stalker," he said. He went back to his food then and I picked my bowl up. Some ridiculous zombie movie was on TV and Paul's attention, thankfully, focused on that. His lack of concern about the situation unnerved me. I had been 100% sure last night, even as I was making the decision, that I would wake up alone. The domesticity of the picture shook me.

"Are you done with that bowl?" I managed to ask when Paul set his empty bowl on the table. He nodded and I took it to the kitchen. Even though I had a dishwasher I washed it by hand before drying it with soft kitchen towels. My mind was occupied with racing thoughts and I jumped when Paul's arms slid around me from behind.

"You need to stop thinking so hard," he said quietly. I closed my eyes as his warmth seeped into me. As much as I hated to admit it I had grown to care deeply about Paul, despite his hot temper and big mouth.

"I'm trying," I said softly.

"Tell me what's on your mind," he urged. I sighed.

"This is too complicated," I confessed. "We're friends and this is going to fuck everything up. Sex always does." His breath made my hair ruffle.

"We've been circling each other for months Swan," he said softly. "Either this was going to happen or we'd hate one another for the rest of our lives. I, for one, couldn't live with that. Could you?" I shook my head. Paul was the only one squarely in my corner. He'd been the one constant in my life, even before Jake and I broke up. And he was right. We had been circling one another. We had poked and prodded and tested until everything blew up in our faces.

"And what happens now?" I asked fighting the urge to lean into his touch as one of his hands gently traced patterns on my stomach. I could feel him shrug.

"How the hell should I know?" He asked. "I you forget this part is new to me too Swan."

"We can't go back to eating pizza, watching bad TV and being friends," I pointed out. He chuckled, his breath grazing the skin of my neck softly.

"We can do all of those things, pet," he pointed out. "Except now we can touch each other, kiss each other, have sex if we want."

"And when it gets old for you?" I asked trying to keep my head on straight as his teeth caught my earlobe and his hand slipped into the front of my shorts. I caved and leaned my head back into his shoulder.

"We'll figure it out as we go," he whispered. His hand cupped my sex, almost possessively and I closed my eyes. He laughed softly and removed his hand after one aching moment. "I'd love to continue this Swan, but we're supposed to be at the god awful meeting in an hour."

"Sonuvabitch," I swore quietly as he moved away. No wonder the girls at the reservation practically panted and worshipped at his feet. He was sex walking. I shook my head to clear it and headed for my bedroom to get changed for the meeting. We drove down together in my car, knowing but not saying out loud that we would return to my apartment together. We didn't speak. Paul just cranked the stereo and sang along, badly, to Guns n Roses.

Unfortunately we were late and my car skidded to a stop outside of Sam's house. Construction had detoured us around the back entrance to La Push and we had been forced to drive ten miles around, nearly all the way to Forks, in order to avoid it. I was dashing up the front stairs when Paul caught my hand and then pressed me into the side of the house. His lips were hot on mine, feverish and I responded instantly to his hot-blooded kiss.

"There," he said tugging my hand to pull me back around to the front. "Now we can go deal with this shit." We slipped into the meeting, Sam shaking his head as he noticed, quite obviously, that we had finally arrived.

"As I was saying, this fresh trail means double patrols for everyone," Sam said with a scathing look in our direction.

"Dad's mad," Paul quipped and I hastily turned my giggle into a cough. Sam continued to drone on about patrols and my mind drifted. I didn't realize the meeting was over with until Raven poked me sharply. We were the last two left in the kitchen.

"What have you been up to, dirty girl?" She asked. "Don't think I didn't notice Paul's car isn't out there." I shrugged.

"It wouldn't start," I said.

"Liar," she said. "Spill your guts before Emily comes back in or Kim tries to drag us to the mall."

"Nothing happened," I insisted but the color blooming on my cheeks told a different story. She laughed.

"Tell that to your face," she said. "Let's have it."

"Okay so he spent the night," I said.

"In bed with you?" She asked. I nodded. "Naked?" She asked and I nodded again. "I fucking knew it. He's been circling you like you're a bitch in heat for months." I made a face at the description.

"Nice picture Raven," I said. She shrugged.

"The symbolism applies," she said. "Was it good? All my friends say he is phenomenal."

"I really don't want to talk about this," I said. She sighed.

"Fine then, spoil my fun," she said. "I'll get it out of you one day though."

"Thanks for the warning," I said slightly sarcastically and she laughed. Paul staggered through the door, punching and fake wrestling with Jake until they reached the table.

"Are we heading back?" He asked. "Or did Raven talk you into that elusive girl time?" Paul had no clear sense of what girl time was. He thought it was like porn, naked pillow fights and lesbian sex. In reality it was flannel pajamas, margaritas and sappy romance movies.

"We can head back," I said. "Unless you have patrol or something." Paul waved it away.

"Weren't you listening?" He asked. "The trail is up in PA. I guess I'll be surfing your couch this week." A flash of heat and longing hit me like a ton of bricks but I tried to keep my face neutral.

"Fine but you wash your own damn dishes," I said. Jake didn't seem to catch on to the sexual tension in the room. Raven grabbed his arm.

"Come on," she said tugging him slightly. "Bella, I'll see you for dress shopping next week."