Chapter Ten: Secretive Secrets and Uninvited Visitors
Shadows squeeze at closed up veins,
Shouting matches with empty rooms.
Glittering eyes from a forgotten era.
Bilbo wakes to a heart threatening to burst from his chest and a body in agony. The memories of the dream are already fading from his memory but he can still acutely feel the terror of its end, bubbling through his veins like nitrogen in victims of the Bends. His eyes only open for a moment before he squeezes them shut again in the bright morning light. His fingers clench sporadically and his breathing feels heavy and laboured, as if he's just ran a marathon. He fights to calm himself.
It's only when his heart-rate finally comes down that he can come to assess the pain in his body. There is something simultaneously blunt and sharp pointing into his neck, constricting his breathing slightly and probably leaving a lovely bruise. The tendons from shoulder to jaw on his left side feel like someone tightened the strings on a bow too tight. He tries to move his neck but quickly aborts the attempt when it becomes obvious that it's not such a good idea.
He opens his eyes reluctantly. Dust moles float lazily through the air, lit golden by the dappled light of the morning sun streaming through his window. A glance downwards reveals the sharp-blunt thing in his neck to be the corner of the book- he'd fallen asleep halfway through the section on peppermint. He sighs- the cat is nowhere in sight (not that that means much when he's lying at all the wrong angles on his bed) and he feels hot and unrefreshed; the covers too heavy on this warm morning.
Slowly, agonizingly, he stretches out the muscles in his neck. They protest viciously but eventually give in and with some relief he closes the book and tosses it down to the foot of his bed. It makes a satisfying thwump when it lands, fluffing the cover up around it. He rolls himself out of bed and goes through the motions of waking up in the usual post-morning wake-up daze, shuffling through to the bathroom, wrapping himself firmly in his dressing gown as he does so.
It's only after he relieves himself that he hears the voices coming from his kitchen. The deep voices of his (once again) unwelcomed visitors reverberate through the walls; a low, broken hum that sinks down to his bones. He sighs at the bedraggled reflection in his mirror, only half-heartedly trying to fix the bird's nest of sandy hair. He soon gives up on the venture and makes his way to the kitchen.
He can see from the doorway that Fili and Kili have once again helped themselves to his kitchen and his tea supplies. The table and chairs have been moved back to their rightful place he notices, the heavy iron ring of the cellar door still visible from where he stands. The brothers are yet to notice him and he takes a moment to watch them, happily discussing the benefits of something or other (he's not entirely sure what they're actually talking about. Some young person thing he guesses). Wraith is once again sitting on his table, this time contentedly sipping at a saucer of milk.
"You'll make him fat if you keep that up." He finally remarks. Fili, who had been halfway through taking a sip of his tea, swallows too quickly and chokes. Kili slops liquid down the side of his cup. Wraith ignores him.
Kili, ignoring the plight of his spluttering brother, turns in his seat to face Bilbo.
"Good morning Mister Baggins! The cat let us in," he says sweetly, acting for all the world as if they hadn't broken in to his house again; the cat letting them in excuse be damned.
Bilbo sighs in resignation and sits down at the table. They had been kind enough to make him a cup, and Kili slides it over to him, still smiling at him. Fili, only just recovering from his attempt at inhaling his drink, rasps a weary 'good morning' at him.
"So… are you going to do some more gardening?" Bilbo asks nonchalantly, holding the warm mug of milky goodness between his hands. The brothers share a sheepish look between them and Kili shakes his head.
"No. Our mum was pretty peeved-"
"-Bat-shit crazy livid more like-"
"-That we forgot about work, so we've got an impossible amount of chores to do at home now."
Bilbo looks at them suspiciously, "But you still found the time to break into my house again?" he says dubiously.
"Hey now!" Kili defends, "the cat let us in! By all rights that's a very important distinction!" Bilbo stares. The boy squirms under his flat gaze; Fili disguise his grin behind his mug.
"Okay," he accedes, "so technically that's not really a form of explicit invitation- but it should be!"
Bilbo snorts and takes a greedy sip of his tea.
And immediately regrets it.
That poor brew, he thinks despairingly, only just preventing himself from looking dolefully down at his cup of ruined tea. Obviously brewing tea is another thing he'll have to teach the brothers.
He's very proud that he doesn't spit the disgusting liquid out, and forces a smile (albeit strained) of appreciation at the remarkably puppy-like brothers. He sets the mug down gingerly on the wood.
"So then… was there another reason you're here? Or is it purely for the pleasure of my company?" the young men smile, but it doesn't quite reach their eyes. Bilbo watches them with narrowed eyes. He has a feeling he knows what they're dredging up the courage to say. He steeles himself for the inevitable. Eventually, Fili speaks up- even if it is directed at the cup between his hands.
"We were here for another reason actually. See… we kind of wanted to talk to you about the doctor thing." He looks up hopefully at Bilbo, who is currently watching them blank-faced and silent. Taking this as encouragement, the blonde carries on.
"I'm sure you know by now, but Erebor really needs- and when I say really, I mean really, desperately needs a doctor. Traditionally… well in the past, the position was filled by one of own- either by virtue of a university education or mastery of herb lore. But education is expensive now, and herb lore's been lost to us for almost a century. And to be frank, pretty much all of our efforts go into the mines now-
"-And I swear to Mahal we're getting dumber-" interjects Kili. Fili ignores him.
"-With our dwindling population we can't afford to spare anyone- we've needed a doctor for a good five years now. The closest one is in Dale- an hour from here. And… well he'd a bit rubbish."
"Monumentally shit, would be the phrasing I'd use." Offers Kili. Bilbo rolls his eyes.
"If you need a doctor so badly, why don't you just ask for a government placement?" asks Bilbo impatiently. The brother's share another uncomfortable glance.
"Funny you should mention that," says Kili, "See… we've not exactly had the best of relationships with the government in the past-"
"-Not for a long time." Bilbo's never heard of any recent unrest in Rhovanion, so he stores the information away for later, unwilling to disrupt the first proper explanation he's had all week.
"-And… well there's also the whole not-strictly-legal mine thing we've got going on too."
Bilbo, halfway through the process of pretending to take another sip of his tea, accidentally chokes on his drink and sprays it over a very indignant Wraith.
"It's what?!" he manages to splutter. The brothers both look as if they'd been caught taking a cookie from the cookie jar. Kili scratches at the back of his head to give himself something to do.
"It's like I said before- we didn't exactly have the best of relationships with the government. So we… we ah…" Fili looks as if he's struggling to find the right words.
"We've been pretty much off the map for the last sixty years." Kili finishes for his brother.
Bilbo stares at them uncomprehendingly.
"According to the Sovereignty, there's a great Erebor sized hole where our town should be."
"Or, more to the point, they just think we're a dead backwater town with nothing to its name."
"To the government, we don't exist-"
"-For as long as they've been in power, at least."
The full weight of the boys' confession crashes down on him. He sucks in a breath, too shocked to speak. Wraith is watching him with shrewd eyes, tail curled elegantly around his paws. The tip of it twitches.
"But then… what about tax?" he manages to choke out, "And- what about the mine? Who do you sell the minerals to? What's the bloody point?"
"… The black-market?" cringes Kili.
"The black-market?" Bilbo shrieks, barely believing his ears. He pushes himself away from the table to pace the kitchen. He rubs his eyes tiredly, forcing himself calm as he turns back to the brothers, "Sixty years, you said. Sixty years of being a non-existent town.
"I just… why? Why would you even bother?"
"If the Sovereignty found out about the mine, they'd take it away." The conviction and bitterness in Fili's voice almost surprises Bilbo, but he's feeling too surprised already, "Mount Lone's been our heart and soul for hundreds of years; aeon's longer than any Sovereignty. When the Sovereign came into power, we knew exactly what would happen were we to join with them on 'even' footing."
"They'd have robbed us blind. Stolen everything we had and ground it to dust." Kili's voice is uncharacteristically cold.
Bilbo resumes his pacing to settle his temper.
"This is fraud, you realise." He's proud of how even his voice comes out, "How can you possibly think you could get away with this?
"What happens when they find out? " he swings around, voice getting louder despite his efforts, "And they will. One day, they'll find out. What are you going to do then? Fight? Give in? This isn't a fucking game! This is- this is fucking insane! Ludicrous! How have you even managed to last this long?"
The boys shrug helplessly. He let out a frustrated noise. This was ridiculous. Utterly and completely unbelievable; like something out of a fucking fairy-tale. He half expects Gandalf to pop his head through window with his stupid sparkly eyes and laugh that it was all just a stupid jo-
Oh Aulë.
"It's Gandalf isn't it? You've got an insider, erasing any mention of Erebor from the government records."
Fili and Kili watch him with expressionless faces, but Bilbo knows he's right. He had said Gandalf would make an excellent politician.
"It is him! How long has he been doing this for you? From the beginning? No- he's not old enough for that- that would make him at least eighty- probably ninety. The bugger's old but not that old."
Kili bites down on his knuckle to stifle a snicker. Fili is noticeably more serious; he knows that if Bilbo decides not to help them- insists on having no part in this- then they are ruined. If his uncle even allows the man to leave that is.
He cannot let that happen.
"What are you going to do?" he interrupts Bilbo mid-rant. The man freezes in his pacing, "Report us?"
Bilbo says nothing, his face stoically turned towards the fridge. He takes it as encouragement.
"What has the Sovereignty done for us anyway? Unity in the face of evil, sure. But at what cost? Silenced minorities, statute mandated theft and people too scared to talk out."
"That's not true." defends Bilbo.
"Really?" asks Kili, "Then what about Ferumbras Took?"
Bilbo's hand trembles.
"How did you know about him?" he breathes, falling shakily back into his chair.
The brothers share a guilty look.
"We know a lot about you Bilbo. Gandalf had to be sure you were the right person for us."
Bilbo remains silent. Ferumbras had been a close friend at university. A distant cousin on his mother's side, he'd been as wild and as outspoken as so many Took's were wont to be.
Too outspoken, it turned out.
In university, the young man had begun spouting radical theories about the sovereignty, how a greater evil had only been usurped by a lesser evil. Most of his family had shunned the young man, happy in their ignorance and unwilling to venture into unchartered territory. But he'd managed to gain a following amongst his younger, more impressionable relatives. Bilbo was not immune to Ferumbras' charm and seductive arguments.
At university it all seemed so reasonable. They were smart (too smart) and held authority in that critical light so typical of young people. The history of their parent's youth seemed too clear-cut and manufactured, and there were suspiciously few accounts of the war before the sovereignty burst from obscurity, saving them all from the impending doom of Sauron and his fanatical followers.
They hadn't been a rebellion so much as an investigation. Curious about pre-sovereign history, they'd started asking questions, and, ultimately looking for answers. It had been unnervingly difficult to find anything; as though their libraries and archives had been systematically wiped clean.
And then, out of the blue (as many accidents were), Ferumbras was killed in a hit-and-run accident.
The ensuing police investigation revealed that his closest friend had been a Sauron sympathiser all along. His name and everything that he'd achieved (which admittedly was quite little) lost all credibility.
Bilbo quickly convinced himself that his cousin had used him- had bent the true facts to convince him of some great conspiracy. He trained himself to quash critical thoughts of the government as soon as they arose, terrified they would somehow turn him traitor like Ferumbras. It took a depressingly short time to return to the dull normalcy of life. But return it did, and with it went all thoughts of revolution and suspicion (though there'd always been that sneaking suspicion that the accident had been no accident at all).
So why, did Kili find it felicitous to bring him up? It had been over a decade ago, and those minor stirrings of dissent hardly meant he was a revolutionary- then or now.
The realisation hits him hard enough to break bones.
"You're blackmailing me."
The boys have the grace to look affronted at the thought.
"Hardly, Mister Boggins. Kili was just trying to convey the corruption that lies in the government." Bilbo shakes his head at Fili's defensive tone.
"No… No. I know a power-play when I see one. You may not be aware of it, but Gandalf told you that information for a reason." He sighs, running a hand tiredly through his hair. What a morning, "This is your security. Gandalf knew your secret would get out sooner or later… my history- your knowledge of it… it's there to ensnare me; inform me of my position in the town. The moment your secret slipped from your lips, he made sure that there was something to keep me here. If the Sovereignty were to know about my involvement with Ferumbras, they'd be after me like a hound to a wounded hare."
"Don't be ridiculous. We'd never blackmail someone!" Splutters Kili, appalled at the thought of it. Bilbo sends him a look.
"If you have a man capable of erasing an entire town from the government records for over sixty years, imagine how easy it would be to construe a story about me being a Sauron supporter. If I choose to leave Erebor… I'm as good as dead."
The brother's appear almost as horrified at the realisation as Bilbo feels. Fili takes a fortifying drink of his tea, "for what it's worth- Kili and I had no idea that this was Gandalf and Thorin's intentions."
Bilbo offers a half-hearted smile in return, "I'm sure you didn't." they sit in silence, all three wondering how many people like Bilbo Erebor planned to lure in and trap. Were the town elders trying to build a revolution, or even an army? Or was it just as simple as a dire need to replenish their dwindling numbers with professionals? And what about the brochure Anaya had thrust at him all those weeks ago? Was it fake, or had Erebor really put it into circulation? Surely for a town trying to keep itself a secret making a public brochure about its real estate would be the world's stupidest idea, right up there with diet water and the battery powered battery charger.
The moment stretches on. Wraith, who'd long ago finished his breakfast, gives a laconic Mraaw and jumps down onto Kili's lap. In doing so, the cat's paws (in a move that Bilbo suspects was quite deliberate) hit a rather precious place and the boy cries out violently, his face rapidly turning an unhealthy shade of puce.
Fili and Bilbo burst into laughter as he curls over on a somewhat smug-looking cat, cursing and wheezing at the pain. The image is so absurd that they can't help laughing at his expense and Bilbo finds himself looking at the day better already. After all, the brothers could hardly be held at fault for the machinations of their elders.
With the ice now broken, they get on easily, once again discussing the various places Bilbo should visit. The permanency of his residency is skirted around nervously, ignored for the most part in order to preserve the growing friendship between them.
They're giggling like school-boys over a particularly amusing tale about one of Bilbo's numerous cousins when Wraith's ears pick up and the cat jumps to the floor and runs off. Not long after, a distinctly feminine "Honey I'm home!" rings through the house, interrupting their easy laughter.
The boys fall quiet and Bilbo jumps to his feet, surprised by the intrusion. He smiles as the mad woman rushes her may into the room. She sweeps him off his feet and kisses him full on the mouth; which in retrospect, should have shocked him more than it did.
"Oh Bilbo this house!" Anaya gushes in excitement, setting the poor man down as she does, "It's absolutely perfect! I want to live all my life here!"
It is upon stating this quite triumphantly that she notices their company. Kili is sitting there, smiling in that mildly perplexed way of his, not quite sure what to do at the sight of a full grown woman manhandling his host. Fili is just downright staring.
"Hello!" she says enthusiastically, "I'm Anaya!"
"Ah… Fili… at your service." It's not the first time Bilbo's seen the brothers lost for words, but it's certainly the most memorable. Anaya is significantly younger than Bilbo and looks it too. Not to mention the noticeable difference in temperaments. Kili frowns at his brother for leaving him out of the introductions.
"Kili, at your service ma'am." neither seem to remember their full manners and bow at the stranger, which is for the best. Anaya would have laughed, Bilbo suspects, long and hard.
Her grin is just this side of manic.
"And how do you two fine men know my Bilbo?" they look at one another sheepishly.
"We're on a bit of a mission," starts Fili.
"See, Erebor is in need of a doctor-"
"And Bilbo is conveniently-"
"A doctor." The smile Anaya gives them this time is just as warm, but considerably more restrained. Bilbo snorts at the exchange.
"I see. And how much luck have you had so far?"
"None."
"It's like trying to convince a brick wall-"
"Only there's more tea and cake involved." She laughs heartily.
"Oh, I like you two- can we keep them Bilbo?"
"Out of the question. They're eating me out of house and home as it is. I don't need them here permanently; I'd go broke within a month." He looks at the brothers as if sizing them up, "Although, with enough training it would be good to have them work the gardens for us."
They look almost horrified and Bilbo and Anaya laugh at the image.
"I did notice you'd already started on the garden." She remarks, looking out the kitchen window into the slightly less unkempt flora outside, "Making the place yours already, I see." Bilbo grimaces at the smug look on her face, quelling the urge to childishly stick his tongue out at her.
"How could I not? Honestly, have you seen the state of their gardens? A Baggins with a neglected garden is no Baggins at all." She rolls her eyes.
Fili and Kili, feeling somewhat that it's about time for them to leave stand up awkwardly. Bilbo notices the movement and turns to face them.
"Leaving?" he asks innocently. The brothers smile.
"Yeah. We'd better get back to the pub before Ma rips us a new one." Bilbo laughs through his nose. He'd rather like to meet their mother.
"Righto then. I'll see you later?" they nod like eager puppies.
"Yup." They answer, eerily synchronised. They turn and bow to Anaya. Bilbo winces; the manic grin returns to his friend's face.
They hear a pleading "Are you sure we can't keep them?" as they let themselves out.
The brothers walk down the garden path in something of a daze.
"Fili," Kili says as soon as they're out of earshot of the house, "we totally just spoke to a woman!"
"I know. I'd half forgotten what they were like. She was…"
"Amazing? Spectacular? Beautiful?"
"Is that adoration I hear growing in your voice dear brother?"
"I admit nothing!" Fili won't admit, on threat of death, that he feels the slightest hint of threat at his brother's interest. Which is ridiculous because the woman is clearly involved with Bilbo, the lucky bastard.
They're halfway down the street when they hear their names being called.
It's Anaya.
Her smile is still in place when she catches up to them. Her feet are bare. Both men are struck by the sheer… life in her.
"I'm here to warn you." She says, barely out of breath. Her smile is friendly but her eyes are serious. Fili briefly wonders how she manages to do that.
"Warn us?" Kili parrots. Her beam slips away to a mere sliver and her face turns melancholic.
"Bilbo… recently lost a great deal. We came here primarily to escape his past… and being a doctor was a great deal of that. I took him to Erebor because I thought it would give him a renewed purpose." She sends them a pointed look, "But don't push it. He's still raw and there are times when you just need to back off and give him space. Please don't make the mistake of alienating yourselves by pushing too hard. I've seen it happen and it's not pretty, believe me." She turns rueful.
"He will break. Just give him time."
And with that, she turns and skips back up the empty street and through the recently cleared path into Bilbo's home. They stand and watch her go, simultaneously bewildered and awestruck. Women their age are hard to come by in Erebor, and those that are there are fierce, sometimes more manly than then men. Are all Shire women like this? Fili thinks he'd rather like to find out some time.
"I…" starts Kili, before quite forgetting what it was he wanted to say. Fili laughs and turns back around, leading his brother away by the sleeve.
"I know brother, I know."
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