Chapter Twenty-Eight: Decisions and Goodbyes
I really hate to let this moment go
Touching your skin and your hair falling slow
When a goodbye kiss feels like this
Don't you wanna stay here a little while?
Don't you wanna hold each other tight?
Don't you wanna fall asleep with me tonight?
"Don't You Wanna Stay" by Jason Aldean featuring Kelly Clarkson
"Damn Bella got hot!" Was the first words I heard from a Cullen again, Emmett naturally and the corner of my mouth turned up into a smile despite myself. I loud smack told me, without looking, that Rosalie had popped him one. I slipped my hand into Carter's, drawing a shocked inhale from pretty much everyone in the pack, but I needed the steadiness his presence would bring.
They looked the same, I don't know why that still surprised me. Time would leave them frozen as I continued to change and grow. They were beautiful but in an untouchable way; like a china doll on a high shelf when you are a child. Beautiful to look at but never yours to hold. Carter squeezed my hand gently as I finally raised my eyes to Edward's. He was still so beautiful that it hurt to look at him; messy bronze hair and lopsided smile.
"Hello Bella," he said softly. I nodded to him.
"Thank you for coming," I said to the group at large.
"If we had known you were in such danger," Alice began but Carlisle cut her off with a hard glare. She snapped her mouth closed.
"So what do we do?" I asked. "I just want this all to be over." Carlisle glanced at Jasper who looked more relaxed than I remembered.
"It's not going to be easy," Jasper answered. "Sources indicate that Victoria has approached the Volturi for help." I bit the inside of my cheek so hard I tasted blood.
"What does that mean?" I asked when I could find my voice.
"It means that even if they deny her they will become aware of you," Edward answered this time. "Which means what?" I asked patiently. His golden eyes met mine.
"It means that they will come here," he answered. "In thousands. Even with the entire wolf pack we won't be able to stand against them." I could feel my legs wobble slightly and Carter steadied me.
"How do we fix this?" I asked with as much strength as I could muster.
"You could run but there is always the risk that they will follow," Carlisle cut in. "At this point the only option would be to turn you." I sank weakly to my knees in the grass. One glance at Sam told me that he knew this would be the answer. His jaw was set; clenched. I could hear shouting break out but it was dim; in the background. Once I would have begged for this. I would have gladly decided on eternity if it meant more time with Edward. Why did this happen the second I might have something to live for.
"I'm taking her back," Carter's voice cut through my fog. Warm hands lifted me from the grass I let them guide me. I met his eyes and the entire future, what it could have been, rushed through me. My knees buckled slightly with the power these possibilities held. Children I would never have. Warmth I would never feel. "You're not doing this," Carter snapped when my eyes met his again. "You can run. We can run." I nodded in agreement even though I knew this wouldn't happen. I would never leave the pack exposed to the Volturi while I was safe somewhere else.
"Okay," I murmured hoping I sounded convincing. "We'll run." The second the front door closed hot lips covered mine. Hands slid into my hair and I answered the kiss with passion. Tomorrow I would be dead, or at least somewhere near there. Today I was alive. Today would be my last day to experience human emotion; human sensation. I pushed his shirt off impatiently and ran my fingers over his exposed chest. It was taut and smooth; hot under my fingertips.
"Slow down," he mumbled into my lips as he caught my hands between his. I shook my head.
"No," I snapped. "Please don't make me beg Carter. Please. I need this." I lifted my shirt over my head during the pause. His rough hands traced my body; answering my plea without words. My body ignited under his touch.
"Bedroom," he muttered as I tugged his jeans over his hips. He lifted me easily and kicked his jeans away from his feet. Our lips met again and again. We made it to the bedroom and he kicked the door closed. He set me on my feet and I shimmied out of my pants. I wished suddenly that I hadn't taken so long to become normal again. I could have been spending all of this time touching him and tasting him. Instead I had only now; just this once to soak him in. He pressed me to the bed with his weight and my skin thrummed with desire.
"More," I demanded as his thumbs rubbed over my nipples. He bent his dark head and my back arched at the touch of his tongue on my nipple. I wanted to bathe in these sensations; commit them to memory even though I knew I would eventually forget them in my vampire life. I heard a rustling and Carter emerged holding a condom. I didn't want it. I just wanted to him. I shook my head.
"Are you sure?" He whispered. I nodded.
"Birth control," I invented on the spot even though I hadn't been on birth control in years. He moved to hover over me again. I closed my eyes in bliss as he slowly filled me. It had been so long, too long really but my body remembered how to stretch to accommodate him. He filled me slowly; his eyes never leaving mine. I closed my eyes when he started to move, focused on the feelings and sounds even as my body hummed in pleasure. My first orgasm came from nowhere and I cried out in surprise, my eyes flying open in shock. Carter's eyes were amused and he nuzzled my neck affectionately.
"More to come," he promised huskily. He was true to his word, his body coaxing three more orgasms from mine before he finally exploded inside of me. His hoarse exclamation of pleasure make tears prick my eyes. I wished again that we had more time together even as our bodies still shook with pleasure. I pressed a finger to his lips when he opened his mouth to talk.
"We'll figure it out later," I said. His eyes closed and he nodded. When he was deeply asleep I slipped from bed. I showered quickly and braided my hair before slipping on the closest pair of jeans and a shirt. Leah, thankfully, was nowhere to be found. I found my phone and tapped a quick text message to Carlisle. The key to this working was speed. If I got to my car quickly enough no one could stop me. I grabbed the keys from the counter and made my way quietly, barefoot, to my car. It started up easily and I turned the lights on. As I pulled out the lights fell on Carter's shocked face in the doorway.
"Bella no!" He shouted. I slammed the car into gear and gunned it. In the end he was no match for my car and he was forced to stop at the boundary line as I sped for the Cullen house, tears obscuring my vision almost to the point of blindness.