Chapter Eighteen

Astrid's gut twisted. Coward. She was such a coward. Running away like that. Running away from Elsa. But how could this happen? How could she let this happen? Fall for someone so powerful as Elsa? Someone so regal. She's a queen. What would happen if they did get involved. Nothing good. She wouldn't want to leave Berk and Elsa couldn't leave Arendelle.

It just wouldn't work.

Still. Elsa glanced back. Her hair whipped into her eyes and she shoved it away from her forehead. The massive ice castle and the mountain it sat on grew smaller and smaller every heartbeat. And Arendelle grew closer. Ever closer. Astrid kicked Stormfly faster.

Stormfly huffed, raking sideways, causing her to fall off the saddle to the left. "What are you doing, girl? Straighten out, already."

Stormfly dipped, suddenly, then flapped her massive wings and flew up, up, up and around, doing a loop mid-air. This time Astrid did fall off. She yelled. Air buffeted her eyes, cheeks, lips. Her stomach twisted and seemed to lift into her throat. She threw her arms and legs out to slow her decent. Waiting.

Waiting.

Waiting.

Finally Stormfly appeared beneath her, catching her as smoothly as ever, slipping gracefully into position between her arms and legs. They soared upward once more, and Astrid punched her dragon's neck. "Don't ever do that again, Stormfly. Not unless I ask. I'm not some piece of wood you can fetch."

Stormfly eyed her, bright yellow eyes glaring. If looks could maim, Astrid would surely be hurt.

Astrid's anger wilted. "I know. I know, okay. I'm an idiot."

Stormfly dipped again, this time closer to the town, leading them down to Arendelle. Leading her down to someone she really didn't want to see right now, even though Astrid didn't even know it herself. Anna titled her head up to them, waving. Astrid's guilt tripled upon seeing Esla's sister. No, no, no. She couldn't bear to see Anna. Not now. Not yet. Astrid tried to turn her dragon around, but Stormfly was too quick for her. At once, her dragon flipped over, making her fall off for the second time that afternoon. This time, it was only a few feet from the ground and Astrid landed easily in front of Anna.

"Wow!" Anna gushed, closing the distance between them and grabbing onto her arm. "That was amazing! Can you teach me to do that someday? Your dragon is amazing. I wish my dragon could be big enough to carry me."

Astrid nodded, smiling. Wishing Anna would keep talking, keep gushing over dragons, and not notice her sister wasn't with them. A heartbeat later, Astrid knew that wouldn't be the case.

Anna's rambling stilled, her smiling faded. "Where's Elsa?"

Astrid tore her gaze from Anna and scuffed her boot against the pathway. "I—" But she couldn't say it. It was too embarrassing. Too cowardly. Too much to think about. She wished Anna would leave her alone to think.

Anna's hand tightened on her arm. "Astrid. Where's my sister?"

Don't be a coward about this, too. Sucking in a deep breath, Astrid caught Anna's gaze and muttered, "At her ice castle."

"At…at her…" Anna's gaze left hers and drifted to the mountain. "Did you…?" She snapped her attention back to Astrid, color rushing to her cheeks and eyebrows knitting together. "Did you leave her there or something?"

Astrid tightened her lips, not wanting to say the words. Especially not to Elsa's sister. But they had to be said. "Yes."

Anna clapped a hand over her mouth, but her gasp could surely be heard throughout Arendelle. "You what?"

Elsa sighed. Now what? She stared out over Arendelle, so clear in the afternoon light. Now what indeed. Astrid took Stormfly, their ride up here. How was she to get back down to her fair city? She eyed her ice castle, remembering Marshmallow, the giant snowman she had created to protect her castle during that eternal winter. He had wandered off long ago, in search of colder weather, probably. More snow. More creatures like him, too, maybe.

She looked to the horizon once more and remembered Icicle. The dragon. The one she created for Anna. Tiny, useless here probably unless he could call for other, bigger dragons.

Elsa's eyes widened. Bigger dragons? She raised her hands and called up the cold, swirling some snow between them.

Well, why not?

"You left her there?" If everyone in Arendelle could hear Anna's gasp, everyone in the world could hear her shout.

Shocked by the amount of noise, Astrid stepped back. "Ye-yeah."

"Why?" Anna closed the distance between them. "What happened? Why did you leave her?"

Astrid felt a lump forming in her throat. "I—I just couldn't—"

"Couldn't what?" Anna said, nearly growling the words.

Astrid frowned. Would this woman hurt her? Of course not. Though maybe she deserved it. Finally, she just said it, spit the words out so she couldn't swallow them back down again. "She wanted to move the relationship forward, and I just…I just couldn't."

At once, Anna's shoulders slumped, the muscles in her face relaxed, and she looked at the marketplace where they were standing. At the people milling around. Some had stopped to watch the commotion. Anna stepped back. "Come with me," she said.

"Wha—"

Astrid didn't have time to form her question. Anna grabbed her hand and yanked her forward. They passed by the marketplace, the courtyard, into the huge doors of Anna and Elsa's home, Anna all but dragging Astrid in her haste. Up some stares and down a hallway. It was only then that Astrid recognized the place, this was where Elsa's room was located. She had remembered it from her first night here when she accidentally broke into Elsa's room. Threatened her, even. Was shocked by her calmness.

But Anna didn't go into Elsa's room. She dragged Astrid into a different one, a smaller one, but one no less elegantly furnished. A huge burgundy couch sat facing a massive fireplace, already on even though it wasn't cold. A dresser sat on one end of the room with full-length mirror next to it and a closet next to that. On the back wall, a bookcase spanned floor to ceiling, packed with hundreds of books. A pile of gifts sat in the corner. Engagement gifts. In the other corner sat a huge bed. Kristoff currently sat on it, throwing a ball of paper in the air so Icicle could catch it.

Suddenly it hit Astrid. This was Anna's room.

"Hey, ladies, can I help you," Kristoff's jovial attitude slipped away when he noticed the anger now building on Anna's face.

"Kristoff, leave, please." Anna motioned to the door with her head. "I need to have some girl talk with Astrid."

Kristoff got off the bed and started for the door, kissing Anna on the forehead as he passed by and then shutting the door behind him as he left. Icicle trilled and floated over to Anna, landing on her shoulders. Finally, Anna let go of Astrid's hand. She lifted Icicle off her shoulders and set him on the bed, giving him a loving stroke. He purred and curled up, content.

Astrid stood in the center of the room, awkwardly watching this happen and rubbing one hand with the other. It didn't seem like the girl talk Anna mentioned would be very fun…

Suddenly, Astrid's head jerked to the side, pain raiding from her cheek and through her jaw, a slap reverberating through the room.

"Ow!" She stumbled back and grabbed her jaw.

Anna lowered her hand. "That was for leaving my sister behind, you idiot."

"You dragged me all the way to your room so you could slap me?" Astrid said, dumbfounded.

"I couldn't let the people see such behavior, and I didn't want them to hear our upcoming conversation," Anna replied.

Astrid chuckled darkly, her guilt surfacing again after the pain faded away. "Not really girl talk, is it?"

"No," Anna muttered. She moved closer to Astrid, boots almost touching. It could've been construed as romantic had Anna's face not been contorted in rage. "Listen to me, you stupid barbarian. I trusted you to take care of my sister. I warned you if you did anything to hurt her, anything at all, I would—"

"Hurt me, yeah I remember," Astrid interrupted. "It seems like you got that out of the way."

Anna jabbed a finger into her chest. "You don't get to talk right now. Right now, you listen."

And because Anna was so serious, Astrid nodded.

"Good. My sister has been through enough crap these past few years than to deal with someone like you. To even be near someone like you. Someone who drags her along, acting like you like her, have feelings for her, act like you love her even, and then shove her away like some old toy." Anna's voice rose with each word, until she was shouting again

Love her? Astrid paled. Her knees grew weak. At how clearly obvious she had been. Of course she loved Elsa. She did. But, before she could say anything, Anna drowned her thoughts with shouting.

"She likes you, you idiot barbarian," Anna said. "Even though I warned her about falling in love too fast, she fell in love with you. You don't know how she was when you left for those few days, or how happy she was when you came back."

Astrid moved back slightly. "I do, though. I do know."

"How?" Anna shouted.

"Because I felt the same way," Astrid replied, her voice rising. Anger flared within her.

"Well you have a really crappy way of showing it," Anna said, shoving her away. "Breaking up with her like that and leaving her on the side of the mountain!"

Breaking up? "No, I didn't break up with her." Now Astrid was shouting, too. She grabbed Anna's arm. "I didn't break up with her, I swear."

"Then why'd you leave her on the mountain? You left her there!" Anna tried to wrench her arm away but Astrid held fast. "You left her there alone! Of course you broke up with her."

Suddenly, now more than ever, it hit Astrid. She had left Elsa alone. She had said horrible things to her and then left. How could she not think it was a break up? But was that what she really wanted for them? The churning in her stomach and the sharp knife-like pain digging into her chest made her think otherwise. "I just had to get away. I had to leave. I just couldn't be there anymore."

"Why?"

Astrid sucked in a deep breath and loosened her grip. "I realized I can't be with a queen."

Anna stumbled back as if it. "You…you broke up with her…you left her because you can't be with a queen? Why? Because she's got more power than you? Is this some sort of controlling thing?"

"No." Astrid slumped to the floor, falling to her knees in front of Elsa's sister. Her anger vanished with those last words. It sounded so stupid out loud. So terribly stupid. "I can't…I thought I couldn't be with her because of her responsibilities. It was getting so real, too real, and I got scared. I got caught up in the future. I just couldn't fathom how we would work it out. I don't want to leave Berk, and she can't possibly leave here."

Anna knelt beside her, looking at her with a gentle frown. It seemed like the anger had left her as well. "And you didn't think something like that would be good to have a conversation about? As a…" Anna stopped, her gaze shifting away, then continued, "As a couple?"

A couple. In spite of everything, Astrid felt a smile tug at her lips. Even those simple words lightened her soul. A couple!

"I guess," she started, sifting through her thoughts, trying to figure it out. "I guess the barbarian in me had a flight or fight response and I just…"

"Flew away." Anna finished, now she, too, was smiling. If only a small one. "Just like an idiotic barbarian would."

Astrid chuckled again. "Yes, just like an idiot."

"Astrid." Anna pulled Astrid's hand into her lap and clasped it between her own. "How do you really feel about my sister?"

Heart pounding now, Astrid looked up and met Anna's piercing gaze. A lump formed in her throat once more, and she swallowed it down. "I love her."

Nodding, Anna replied, "I know. Are you willing to fight for her? Because if not, if you're just here to toy with her emotions, I'll—"

"Slap me?" Astrid grinned, rubbing her cheek.

"More than that, if you do this again," Anna warned.

"I know. And I do want to fight for her."

Of course she did.

"I believe you," Anna whispered. "Now, how are we going to get her back to Arendelle?"

Complete. Her creation was complete. A massive dragon crouched before her, completely formed in ice and having almost the same markings as Icicle. She did the final touches, blue shards down its tail and around its neck, crystalline eyes, sparkles on its belly. She did an extra flourish, too, one that she meant to be homage to Anna but turned into something else entirely. It was a symbol of her heart, true, but it had taken to another part of her heart.

Astrid's side.

A massive bright-blue double-edged war ax shimmered on its chest.

Still, Elsa smiled.

"Now," she muttered. "How do I wake it up?"

She thought back to Olaf, the tiny snowman, how she desperately wanted a memory of a joyful time in her life in that moment. She thought back to Marshmallow, of how she desperately wanted protection. Of Icicle, how she desperately wanted Anna to be happy.

Moving closer to the dragon, Elsa touched the war ax.

The dragon awoke.

"Good girl," Elsa whispered.

She petted the dragon's shoulder and laughed as it curled around her much like Stormfly did to Astrid. Her tale arched up high over her head and slapped down, clearly wanting to play.

"Do you want to play fetch?" Elsa asked.

The dragon sprung back, opening its white jaws wide and rumbling. She shook her backside and leaned down.

"Good." Elsa went over to her dragon and climbed on her back. "Time to go, then. I have something very specific in mind."

In a heartbeat, her dragon had spread its giant white wings and taken off, the crystals of its skin glinting in the lowering sun.

They followed Astrid's hectic path to Arendelle. Elsa squeezed the dragon, urging her to go faster. "What shall I call you, girl?"

As if in reply, the dragon opened her mouth and hurled a wave of frost into the air in front of them. Laughing, Elsa said, "Frost?"

Her dragon rumbled, deep in her chest, one that Elsa felt throughout her whole body. Purring. She was purring like Icicle. She rubbed her dragon's neck. "Frost it is, then."

Astrid pulled Anna outside. "We need to get Elsa. Can I borrow a horse or two?"

Anna stopped, jerking Astrid to a halt as well. She pointed up. "Ha! I don't think that's necessary."

Astrid's mouth fell open at the sight. A huge white dragon, sparkling in the sun, was drifting closer to the courtyard. It swooped down, landing near the doors to the marketplace. Elsa slipped off and gave the dragon a pat.

Astrid's inside gave a little kick at seeing Elsa. She had been so stupid before. She grabbed Anna and moved her in front of the sight. "What should I say to her?"

Arching an eyebrow, Anna replied, "Well, apologizing for one would be good."

"Yes," Astrid said, breathlessly, not wanting Elsa to hear. She clung to Anna. "What else?"

Anna tilted her head. "Well, that you love her. And you want to talk to her about—"

Astrid's flight or fight mode was snapping in again. "I can't dive right into that just yet."

Scoffing, Anna searched the courtyard. Kristoff was by the flowerbed, gazing opened mouthed at the new dragon. "Then tell her you and I talked, and you'd like to help throw a ball for me and Kristoff. As an apology for upsetting our engagement. Will that give you enough of an opening to actually talk about your feelings?"

Anna's sarcastic tone cut through Astrid's worry. A plan was already forming in her mind's eye. "Yes, actually. Thanks."

She spun on her heel, ignoring Anna's sputtering behind her and intending on going to see Elsa. It shocked her, however, to see Elsa standing before her.

Elsa gave her a long, searching look. After a few minutes of scrutiny, it seemed like Elsa found what she had been looking for.

"Astrid," she said. "We need to talk."

She grabbed Astrid's hand and led her inside the castle and into an all-too-familiar room. Her own.

SQ: It's been FOREVER! Forever, I know. But at least I updated it finally, right? I'm really happy how this chapter turned out, and I hope you like it, too! Thank you to all the new favorites, followers, and comments! I loved the response I got for my last chapter and hope to get the same for this one! Your comments really helped me solidify what I wanted to happen in this one.

Question for the Next Chapter:

1) Who should make the first move into the sexy times?

I look forward to hearing your thoughts! And, don't forget, I'm going to have a book coming out from Desert Palm press called Finding Hekate sometime next month! (I'm stupidly, stupidly excited about this.)
Warm regards,
Serenity Quill