TRIGGER WARNING: SEXUAL SITUATIONS AND MENTIONS OF ABUSE.

October 9. 2009

After Eddy's latest scheme, Mother and Father have decided I'm no longer trustworthy to be left at home alone. While I pleaded with them to forgive me, they insisted it was better for me if I wasn't alone. They desire to have my uncle come and take care of me for a while until I grow into an honest adult. If it is their wish to test me so, then I accept, I will prove I am worth their trust. Unfortunately I don't know who my uncle is… Mother and Father tell me he is my uncle on my Father's side and I haven't seen him since I was a child, five years old in fact. It's odd… for some reason I do not remember him even though I seem to recall most events in my fifth year of life very clearly. I wonder if maybe they got their facts wrong. They told me his name is David and he will be showing up tomorrow, their last letter consisted of an old picture of my uncle. I would have looked at it longer but I started a dreadful headache and went to take something to calm it down.

Eddy and Ed are grounded as well, but not quite as severely as I hear. Kevin managed to bruise them badly enough for them to get off the hook, I sustained a few bruises but Mother and Father hold me in higher standards so it's only right that my punishment fit the crime. I will clean the house and make dinner for him to make a good impression.

October 10. 2009

Uncle David came today, he's such a strange man, he has this weird feel to him, like an aura of menace. I never thought something like that could happen in real life… Perhaps it is just nerves. He liked my cooking enough, said it was delicious. I hate to say it but David makes me uneasy… He's family, I know, I shouldn't say such things but I'm just so… nervous. Something in my head keeps triggering the fight or flight reaction and I find myself wanting to run away from his strange smile and beady eyes… oh that's terribly rude, his eyes aren't that beady. Oh calm yourself Eddward! You're starting to sound crazy… David is a wonderful person, you're just tired. He said he wanted to play a game remember? That couldn't hurt too badly…

October 10. 2009

I do not like this game.

He said it was a game that he played when he was my age but that can't be… strip poker? I'm not comfortable with it, and when I told him so he became angry. He said some… harsh words likening to 'coward' that I refuse to reiterate. I ran and locked myself in my room where I now sit, writing this. Perhaps it really is just a game but his reaction was way off bounds! Mother and Father will hear about this if it continues.

October 12. 2009

I came home from school only to find my computer smashed and my phone missing. The lines were severed and the house was ransacked. David said that we were probably robbed… but I found nothing missing from the house! I fear David staged it so that I cannot write or call Mother and Father… I do not like where this is going. David's presence frightens me, at the same time my friends tell me I'm worrying too much. Eddy continues to put the spotlight on himself and his schemes, leaving my problems to collect dust. If I can't talk to Eddy… I can't talk to anyone.

October 13. 2009

David is dangerous. I can't believe it. I thought he was a shady character but this is just… deplorable! I come home to be greeted by utter silence, when I'm removing my shoes at the door I stop to untie them and there's suddenly hands on me in places they shouldn't be! I can't even begin to describe how horrified I am. I ran once more. I've tried writing to mother and father manually now, but David might still see it… I'm so terrified and no one is listening to me! No one will help! I've even tried talking to people outside of my comfort zone but I'm shot down. I don't know what to do!

October 14. 2009

I'm a used, filthy, disgusting, horrendous, dishonourable, dirty, dirty human…

October 15. 2009

Help me.

October 16. 2009

Someone.

October 17. 2009

Kill me.

November 1. 2009

Mother and Father came home… I was alone… Uncle had fled upon hearing they were coming back. When I told them what happened they apologised. They said that when I was five he might have done the same things then, but they were unsure. They told me David had spent time in prison for child molestation but there was never solid proof that he'd harmed me in any way. It's clear now. I blocked the events from my memory. What kind of parents would risk that?! When I asked them, my mother started crying… she said they had been assured that he was reformed and fit for society… The only reason they'd asked him to watch me was because he was the only one that could while they went on a trip overseas for research. They didn't know what to do. I told them they should have come home. They should have taken me with them, they should have let me stay with a friend but not this! Not this ever! They left me alone with a perverted pedophile! For god's sake… And Eddy! Eddy still wouldn't listen. He heard bits and pieces but the likelihood that he even was listening to what I was saying is very slim! I fear I'm losing my best friends. I know I've spoken of Eddy more than Ed, but Ed pretty much follows whatever Eddy does… I'll lose them both… I just know it.

November 6. 2009

I haven't slept… I keep having nightmares that he's still here… when I woke up this morning my parents were gone again… I can't take this… so today at school I just… I… exploded. Eddy wouldn't listen to me talk, Ed was being a moron! I'm so sick of everyone pushing me around like I don't matter! THIS HAPPENED BECAUSE PEOPLE THINK I DON'T MATTER! My opinion's are stupid, my body is too thin, I can't fight back, I'm good for book power and that's it. That's all they think! FUCK THEM! FUCK THIS! I'm done! I'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI 'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI' mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'm doneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'md oneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdo neI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdon eI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdoneI'mdone I'M DONE! I hate everyone. But more than anything in this world, I hate myself.

The text ended there, the next page of the book contained a badly taken picture of Edd and the other two Ed's sitting with smiles of glee next to pictures of Edd's parents. What he'd just read… the things he knew now… he wouldn't tell anyone… he couldn't tell anyone. He wouldn't either. Kevin would carry this to his grave and back. It hurt worse that Edd had been going through so many problems and now he knew that he'd been one of the people to push him away. By the look of things this assault went on for a good… 18 days of pure torture. With a sniff, Kevin put the book back in his bag and got off his bed. He hadn't seen Edd since last night and felt horrible for prying now that he knew what had happened. It wasn't his business. He should have listened to Edd when he told him to stop… but his curiosity and so called 'worry' got the better of him.

Kevin crossed the street, the air cold, he'd forgotten his jacket and shivered. He planned on giving the book back to the boy he'd now learned everything about. No… no that wasn't true… he didn't know anything about Edd, he just knew why he was so crass. That wasn't a personality trait, it was a defense. If it killed him, Kevin would become close to Edd, treat him as he should have from the beginning.

He knocked on Edd's door, waiting quietly as it creaked open slowly. Edd raised a brow at his presence and waited for Kevin to explain. Wordlessly, Kevin presented the leather book and watched with a wince as Edd's eyes grew wide. The next thing Kevin knew, Edd's fist came flying at his face, everything went black.