This isnt a parody and what do you mean by "salty" is that a way of saying drunk or on drugs or something becuz I not
Cracker 2 10 years later
It was 10 years later Shazam was 15 and he was wearing the same faded jeans but they were more faded then before because he had been whoring them for 15 years and he was wearing the same shirt but it now also had on Miranda Lamberts face because he discovered he liked country music. He was. Homeless. Because he forgot to paid his bills nad stuff so they kicked him out of the house. Anwyays he wash homeless so he was walking around in the street begging for money. He had a guitar which was his only thing in the world and also a money thing for people to put the money in when he was playing which was his only other thing in the world.
"Wish I could be just a little less dramatic
Like a Kennedy when Camelot went down in flames
Leave it to me to be holdin' the matches
When the fire trucks show up and there's nobody else to blame"
he started to sing and played the guitar along with it. Everyone in the street started dancing then they all threw in some money into his money thing because his music was fucking fantastic and if he wasnt homeless he should have been the #1 contrary singer of the year. He had just enough money to buy a food from Mcdonalds so he went, and, while he was there he got a big mac and like 10 things of french fires, then while he was eating he saw some guys. They were kids. And one of them was a guy who was his age, also there were 2m ore guys whore his age, also there was a girl who was like 10 and another girl ho was like 7 and a guy who was also 8. They looked weird so he went over too them and sat down on their table "HOLLA" he said.
They looked at him "Hey"
"Hey" he said then they recognized his voice "Youre that famous cunty singer arent you they said approvingly "We love youre music."
"REALLY?"
"Yeah Im fang" said the oldest guy he had black hair black eyes black cloths and black pants, and his shoes were black converse shoes, "and this is Max" next to him as another guy with blond hair "and thats Iggy" and long blond hair"and thats Nudge" a blake girl with pigtails "and Angle" the little 7 year old girl with blond hair and "Gassy" the guy who was 8. "We fucking love your music want to travel with us. we do music sometimes too. Ok?"
"YEAS" said Shazam happily.
They gut in there car and left Mcdonalds with there leftovers and Shazam shored his fries and the other dudes let him eat ice cream which he couldnt afford because he was homeless. Because.. Ice cream was to expensive.
They got in the car and Max drove. He was a good driver like he could probably drive for Nascar or something.
"WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
They drove around and Max drove the car up a wall which defined gravity, but they didnt care, also they drove at 3000 miles a hour and then went upside down. They went into a roller coster and it was so much fun but then that stupid bitch Gassy got sick and they had to stop. Nudge and Angle had to leave to make Gassy get clean which was stupid. And they had to get a new car because there old one smelled like thrown up.
Then when there were done cleaning and getting new car, they drove to there house. It was in Chicago so it was a really long way away, BUT, Max drove real fast so they got there in only 2 hours. When they got there Shazam was real happy because he had never been in a house before "Guys this is fucking awesome!" He went in the house and he had HIS. OWN. ROOM. (Authors note I have to share a room with my sister Stephenie even though shes 12 and Im 15 and it SUCK.) He went into his own room and did showers and stuff then did some music and sang to miranda lambert music and then went to bed and fell asleep while the miranda lambert music was still playing. It was the best sleep hed ever had because for once he wasnt sleeping in a trash can with stuff smelling like garbage and hobos raping him in his sleep.