Splatoon: The Bate Bros.
We're Just Gonna Ignore That?
The first light of morning shone over the hill, and soon blossomed into the sun. It was now morning, and the Inklings were slowly waking up. We now find our "heroes" groggily starting to awake, still sore from the mishaps the night before. Splin rose, eyes still mostly shut, and walked over to the kitchen counters. Propping himself up, he reached for the faucet handles, hoping to douse himself to wake him up.
"AAUGH!" He yelled, falling down. Eyes now wide open, Splin picks up a nearby towel and wipes his face. Walking back towards the faucet, he turns the knobs, which prompts water to flow out of the faucet into the sink. Splin wipes his eyes, before he turns off the flow, and turns it on again. Just like before, water simply flowed through the faucet. Reaching out at the water, he immediately recoils in pain at the sudden freezing temperature, like daggers running down his arms. Deciding it was enough, he turned off the faucet and headed back to the beds, where Sharq was still dozing off. As soon as he got there, he started to shake Sharq lightly. "Come on, Sharq. We got a big day today." Getting no response, he sighed and walked over to the dresser, pounding his fist on an alarm clock.
BWOOOOOOOOO!
"WHAT THE-"
"YAAAH!"
The noise the alarm clock made was unexpectedly loud, and sounded more akin to the air horn the two were introduced to earlier. Startled, both brothers reached for their weapons. Splin, grabbing an Inkbrush Nouveau, started to swipe at the clock, whereas Sharq picked up his now Strange Krak-On Roller and slammed it on the clock. Despite the punishment dealt, the clock now chimed quietly, and went back to counting the seconds. Freaked out, the brothers both stared at the clock, before slowly backing up. The roll-odometer on Sharq's Roller went up a notch, signifying his small triumph over the evil alarm clock.
"I don't remember it doing that before!" Sharq said.
"And I don't remember the sink being an ice machine!" Splin added.
"What happened to the sink?" Sharq asked.
"The water that came out was freezing cold!" Splin said, "I dunno why, but instead of the safe stuff we normally get to use, we get pain!"
"Wait… The alarm clock acting up, the sink being messed up, this is probably a dream, right?" Sharq asked, looking around the house for any more oddities.
"Maybe… Just to be safe, we both pinch each other, make sure we're not in some weird dreamland." Splin stated, and walked over to Sharq.
"I gotcha covered!" Sharq said, before aiming a Blaster at Splin.
"WAIT-" Was all Splin could say, before he was knocked back by the blast. Launched outside by the shot, he rolled onto the grass before finally coming to a stop.
"Well, I guess that solves that!" Sharq said happily.
"...Uuh. ...Alright, I'm not dreaming. But how do we know, YOU aren't Sharq?"
"Huh?" Sharq scratched his head.
"For all I know," Splin began, "Is that I could just be a sentient part of your dream, who felt the blast. Now we gotta test you." Splin reached back, and grabbed a Splat Bomb. "Catch." He said, throwing it to Sharq.
"Alright! BLARGH!" The bomb exploded in Sharq's face. Blinking, he began to shake off the ink.
"Whew, I'm good." Sharq stated.
"Well that solves that," Splin said, before tilting his head and ears.
"What is it?"
"...Aren't we missing something, or should I say, someone?" Splin asked, looking around with his ears twitching, listening to any possible noise. The only noise he could hear were the morning roosters, crowing at the sky. "No chuckling, criticism of our choices, or anything?"
"...You're right, where's the voice?" Sharq said, scampering around. "Voice? Where are you?" Lifting up a rock, he found a bunch of pill bugs just chilling underneath. "You guys seen him?" The pill bugs quickly rolled up into balls. "Thanks anyways." Sharq said, putting the rock down.
"Great, the one person who could help us with all this, and he's nowhere in sight." Splin said, before putting his chin to his head. "Actually, he wasn't visible to begin with… Well, we're just gonna have to go into town and figure this out. Sharq, get your things, we're Super Jumping again."
Sharq patted his hat, before switching to Squid form. "Cool, but we better get to eat over there, I'm still kinda hungry." Splin adjusted his headphones to fit on his head, and plugged them into his phone, tapping on the music tracks.
"What're you listening to now?" Sharq asked. Splin walked over to him, took his headphones off, and put them nears Sharq's… Ears? Sharq listened for a moment, before nodding. Putting his headphones on and turning into a squid, Splin and Sharq Super-Jumped towards Inkopolis, whistling through the sky.
Inkopolis Plaza was a wreck. The pavement was cracked, the Booyah Base's windows were shattered, and overall the entire area looked like an earthquake hit. Despite the damage, multiple Inklings were amongst the wreckage, walking and talking about the cause of this destruction. Splin and Sharq landed in an alleyway this time, still landing with a thud. Dazed, the two shake their heads and stand up. Sharq whistled, looking at the cracks and bruises in the earth.
"Yeesh. That news story we saw the other day wasn't kidding. What happened here?" Sharq wondered aloud. Spotting an Inkling girl walking, he shouted and waved, "Hey! Do YOU know what happened happened here?" Getting her attention, she turned in his direction. What Sharq saw next had him scream. The Inkling girl had no face, it was blank. Multiple flashes of eyes and a mouth kept appearing, but disappeared almost as soon as they had been shown. Expecting her to screech at him in a demonic language, he ducked behind Splin in squid form. Confused, Splin turned in the girl's direction, and backed up, eyes wide.
"Whoa." He said, staring at the girl.
The girl tilted her head, before asking in a normal, calm voice, "Are you guys okay?"
Looking at each other, the brothers looked back and nodded at the same time. The Inkling girl then said, "Well, to answer your question, there was some sort of fight here. A lot of people got hurt, but multiple heroes came and saved us." She smiled, or at least the flashing mouth did, before saying, "I wish I could've been there! Um, and not get hurt of course. I could've taken picture or even meet the famous heroes themselves! Oh well, see you later!" She said, before walking away, and disappearing from sight. Rubbing their eyes, the brothers ran in the direction she walked, but sure enough, there was no one there.
"I don't think we did a good job of checking if we were awake." Sharq pinched Splin for good measure.
"Ow." Splin pinched Sharq in response.
"Yow!" Sharq exclaimed. Shaking his head wildly, he began to panic. "S-Splin, I'm freaking out, man."
Splin pinched his nose and closed his eyes in thought. "We really should have cleaned those apples. This could all just be some weird illusion."
Snapping his fingers, Sharq said, "So THAT'S why we couldn't hear the voice! This must all be some apple-based illusion!"
Splin nodded, "That's just a hypothesis really. We can't be too sure."
"Well, maybe if we get a snack and maybe some water, we can sort this out." Sharq suggested.
Splin and Sharq walked away, before immediately tripping on something.
"Agh! Nngh… What did we trip on…?" Inspecting the ground, they spotted a jittering and flashing chunk of concrete. "Uh… Splin…?" The concrete began shaking extremely quickly. "...SHARQ, HIT THE DECK!"
Splin pulled his brother behind a bench, before the concrete exploded, sending tiny bits of glowing and shaking particles everywhere.
"Okay, we really need to get to the bottom of this! I'm not standing around, waiting to get blown up!" Sharq yelled, before the bench they had gotten behind started shaking. They ditched the bench, and it too exploded into bits and pieces. Running away from the plaza, the brothers, looking behind them, could see the Inkopolis Tower itself begin to collapse.
Spl… Sh...r!
"Did you hear that?" Sharq said, beaming. "It's the voice!" He exclaimed, narrowly dodging a stop sign falling down like an axe.
...ou t… Ge… ...tta there!
"What?!" Splin yelled, more and more objects dematerializing in their wake.
Get outta there!
"Why, what's happening?! Is this some sort of huge dream or something?!" Sharq cried out, running past a group of Inklings, who began to fade away.
There's no time to explain! You guys need to leave this place, now!
Frantically looking around, all they could see were paths and buildings flashing out of sight. Inklings began to panic, before they were erased from existence or disassembled into tiny pixels. At the center of it all was a swirling vortex, blue with spirals, seemingly unaffected by the crumbling world.
"...We have to jump through that?" Splin asked.
I'm afraid so. The world's quick deconstruction is a result of you being here, illegally!
"...Huh?" Sharq tilted his head in confusion. "Why? What'd we do?"
It's more of a story reference issue.
The earth began to break away at the two Inkling's feet, threatening to swallow the two whole. They nodded, before starting for the portal. However, because everyone wasted time talking about Splatoon Shared Universe references, the floor began to give away, leaving three solitary raised platforms, Splin and Sharq at the one farthest from the portal.
"Dude, you still got your Strange Krak-On Roller with you?" Splin asked.
"WHO KEEPS SAYING THAT?! If you're a ghost, come out so I can plant a bullet through your face, you figjam!" A voice rang out.
Don't worry about that, Stealth Sniper is just salty. Get over those platforms and jump towards the portal, its pull will do the rest!
Nodding, slightly uncertain, Splin continues. "If you do, douse the platforms with ink, we can jump from rock to rock until we reach the portal!"
Sharq took out his Strange Krak-On Roller…
"GAAAAAHH!"
...And began to fling ink at the rock platforms. The second platform was covered, the range of the Roller weapon not enough to reach the farthest platform. Both of them jumped in squid form at the platform, leaving the previous one they were on to crumble behind them. The world starting to immediately disappear, the buildings and surroundings fading. Covering the next step in ink, they jumped to that one next, the previous platform going the way of its concrete brethren. The last thing between the portal and the two was a large gap, nothing beneath but gray darkness. However, the brothers noticed that beneath them, pebbles and pixels were falling off.
"Let's get outta here!" Sharq yelled, the noise of the vortex increasing to a loud whooshing.
The two jumped, crumbled bits of the platform falling into the void, before they were sucked into the portal… The world behind them, despite what happened, immediately flashed back to normal. All people in the dying Inkopolis previously freaking out, now returned with little to no trauma, albeit the plaza was still wrecked. An Inkling girl, with a normal face, ran around, looking around. "...I hope those guys are okay!" She said, before running towards the plaza.
Splin rose out of his bed, breathing heavily. He turned to Sharq, who was face down on his bed, and shook him. "Sharq?! Are you alright?!" He asked, shaking him more. Groaning, Sharq rolled over to face Splin. "Yeah… What about you?" He asked. Splin hugged his brother quickly, before holding him by the shoulders. "I'm glad we're safe, but what the heck happened over there?! Was it just some sort of dream?! Are we even real?!" Splin snapped in the direction of the kitchen, running to the sink.
"Splin, calm down!" Sharq yelled after him.
"Not until I test something first!" Jumping over the counter, Splin landed by the sink. He reached for the faucet knobs and turned them, water pouring out. Without hesitation, he shoved his hands underneath, breathing a sigh of relief when the water trickled down his skin, stinging slightly but overall not something that would feel like knives running down his arm. Walking back towards the beds and drawer, he looked at the alarm clock. Splin glanced over at his brother, who in turn gave him a thumbs-up and a nervous smile, before Splin triggered the alarm.
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
Collapsing on his bed, Splin stared at the ceiling for a while, Sharq slamming the alarm clock with his Krak-On roller, getting another point for his roll-odometer.
"What happened just now?" Splin asked. He reached for the T.V. remote, sat up, and clicked on the T.V.
A reporter came on screen immediately, the same Inkling man who reported from yesterday. Clearing his throat, he addressed his viewers, before quickly going into the news. "In other news, Callie and Marie are the hot topic of the town, as always."
Staring at the screen, Splin and Sharq waited for him to mention some sort of huge fight, death occurrence, or anything else news breaking. Instead, the reporter merely smiled, saying, "Our two superstars, despite one getting severely burnt by the other on Saturday, are back in business, putting their fight behind them. As a reporter, it warms my heart to see two great celebrities still going strong and getting along despite their disputes. I'm Rus Heba, thank you all for watching Testudinata Today." He said, finishing his report.
"Okay, we're definitely back. Wonder what happened?" Splin closed his eyes and pondered.
Well, you know when I said something about a "dimensional bridge"?
"Yeah…?" Splin asked.
You two actually got stuck in a different dimension. Your presence in that particular universe was unwarranted, and therefore, to get rid of you, the world began to collapse.
"Uh." Splin looked down.
Little hard to comprehend?
"Not really."
"Kinda."
Sharq stared at Splin, who answered, "If we have fish that can generate volts of electricity and guns that shoot ink that we can swim in and kill with…" Splin stood up. "It's not too farfetched that a different series of worlds are out there."
Sharq, confused, asked, "Well how did we end up there in the first place? Did we roll over something while we slept or…?"
Splin just deadpanned at Sharq. "Pretty sure we would notice that happen before."
Actually, that's not too far off. Splin, look under the sheets of your bed.
Curious, Splin lifted the bed covers, and a flashing cube floated out. Not willing to get blown up, the two hid underneath their beds in squid form. Nothing happened for a while. The two peeked out, before Splin became a kid now and investigated the cube. Hovering gently, the cube didn't seem to do anything besides switch colors slowly and add a few flat squares to itself like a screen display. Splin laid back on his bed, hands by his side, and simply said:
"Interesting."
Sharq came out of his tiny shelter, hopping on top of his bed, staring at the cube. "What is that?" He asked, walking around and below it, "oohing" and "aahing" at the tiny pixels that appeared on its exterior.
It's kinda like a teleporter you can fold up into a tiny box, a touch screen.
"What the…? Y'all hear that voice?" Someone said with a confused tone.
"That's what I've been sayin'!" The voice that rang out from before said. "I thought I was going insane from too many hours sittin' at my post!"
Ahem, one second. (Hey guys go to sleep, you're not gonna figure it out yelling. After all, what happens if Heavy wakes up?)
A heavy silence followed.
(Thanks guys.)
"Aw, never mind the bloody voices, I'll just get to the van. G'night, Engie."
"Alrighty, just gotta clean up this here wrench for tomorrow, 'night Sniper."
"Um." Sharq spoke up, "What just happened there?"
Nothing to worry about, just me spouting more references. You two should also get some sleep.
Splin looked outside the window. It was still dark, crickets were chirping. Certainly a difference from the daylight experienced in the other universe. Splin looked back at Sharq, who had already fallen asleep, snoring lightly. He sat in bed, before taking note of the floating "Tele-Cube", as we'll call it.
Might wanna put that somewhere safe.
Taking the cube, he merely put it in his short's pockets, going underneath the covers, and closing his eyes. The cube's brightness lowered, seemingly to accommodate for its new owners' sleep. The two fell back asleep, waiting for the day to break through the night, at least in their world.
AN: Before we begin, thanks again to NSPFan for reviewing my story! Sorry if my narrator voice gets confusing. Mostly characters in this story and future ones can only hear it, so don't worry about having me talk to a whole group of different Inklings later in the story. Hopefully. I'll work on making it less blended in with the regular text, and more direct. Other than that, again, another shout-out… Or, you know, text-on-a-screen-out, to the authors behind the "Shared Universe" Splatoon project. This chapter couldn't have been possible without their awesome stories, even if it was just a handful of references. I felt guilty just referencing their stories, so I thought it would be interesting if Splin and Sharq's presence in their world would shatter reality. Again, I'll edit out the chapters if they don't like the references, this is pretty much the last huge reference I'll make unless I get an "okay" from the other authors. That's all, this is ThePizzaLovingTurtle, off to finish that Medic contract in TF2 I keep sleeping on, (If I have enough time) see you all later!