Hey! I'm back! Trying to be a little more regular with updates now (though we will see how long that lasts, "Set your watches... go!") I enjoy writing this one at the minute as it's more light hearted and I so enjoy writing my teasing (and OOC) Shadow XD

Please drop me a line to let me know if you enjoyed it and or have any pointers, I would be very appreciative :)

I shan't hold ya'll up much longer so without further ado:

Disclaimer: You know the drill :/

A moist click punctuated the release of a canine in the blue boys mouth. Tongue, having detached itself from its favourite tooth, preparing to say something snarky in response to the haughty hedgehog before him. He took a deep gulp of air, wanting to go down in style, he needn't have bothered.

All thoughts jarred as an obnoxious din filled the living room. 'Trust the Ultimate Dullhog to have the most tuneless ringtone ever. I can totally change that to something garish when he's not looking…' Sonic was all pointed ears and smug grin at the thought. So caught up in his plotting was he that Shadows departure went under the radar.

"Ye-...Yes. Yes, of course. I understand. No. That will not be necessary. I-" The ebony mammal froze, suave slimline wireless telephone still held to his head, as a blue oompa loompa came stumbling into the passage. Sonic had scarpered into the hallway as soon as he realised that 1- the awful noise had stopped, 2-Shadow was no longer in the room with him and 3-Shadow in stopping the noise had answered the telephone. He'd sped through, limbs clumsily trying to work together, so he could earwig. The thought had crossed his mind that Tails had changed his mind. Fleeting. But he had hoped. O'course, he wasn't gonna admit that to Shadow any time soon.

Ruby irises eyed the small form, alert, listening and subconsciously raising onto his tippy toes. "-I need to make a call. Transfer me to …"

'What? Transfer him to what? He mumbled so I wouldn't hear didn't he? Who is he calling!?'

Shadow looked at Sonic over one of his stripped shoulders. He was favoured with a frown for his trouble. The Ultimate Life Form remained unaffected.

"Shadow. Yes Sir. No it is in regards to Subject 91711. No Sir. 'P.C' Sir. I wish to request authorised leave in order to complete objectives."

He was doing this on purpose. Sonic knew he was making it sound all the more cryptic because Shadow was secretly a sucker for mystery. That and he loved keeping his rival out of the know. And this little hedgie liked to be in the know. The fact that Shadow's gaze never faltered meant that what Sonic did know, was that he was the topic of conversation. Unable to follow as the conversation progressed, the tot settled for trying to wish hard enough for Shadow to spontaneously combust.

"... see you then Sir." As the flashy phone was returned to the dock, the mystery hog spun around to address his smaller unwilling companion. A slight upwards curvature of the lips caught said small person off guard. 'Is Shadow smiling? At me? Why do I get the impression that it's supposed to be a comforting smile?' The kid stepped back as Shadow began to slightly crouch, arms supported by thighs, so as to get closer to the others eye-level. 'Yeah, I don't know about comforting, but creepy? Most definitely!'

"Shadow wha-"

"You hungry?"

"Huh?" Sonic's face twisted into a spiral of confusion.

"I bet you are. I can't recall you eating at all today."

"Errr. I guess…?"

Quick as a flash Shadow was behind the younger mobian, hand between his shoulder blades, propelling him towards a glossed wooden door. Sonic wound his head around to look the bigger of the two in the face whilst Shadow used his free hand to open the door. Without missing a beat, Sonic was shoved past the threshold.

It was beautiful. Everything. The glossy midnight granite worktops with shiny flecks that made it look like you dropped your food into the black abyss of a starry night sky. The units themselves were a white that usually would have turned grey and tacky after a few uses. But Shadows didn't. No, The Ultimate Neat Freaks units were like mirrors. Whatever cleaning product used must have killed germs and terrified dust. The white was so pristine it was blinding. Vast electric hob that stretched for miles blended seamlessly into the space - esque worktop. The double oven towered above the boy. 'Well, at least I'll be well fed...' A strange urge to peek into the oven, to see just how thorough (or superficial) his rivals scrubbing was, fuelled him for a moment. But then the thought of getting a 'grubby' paw print on his new chefs crystal clear tinted glass oven door and the retribution he would receive put that plan to a premature end.

Moving swiftly on. Standing guard on top the base units was a stainless steel rotating display, jars prepped and at the ready. The many glass containers filled with powers, leaves, seeds and other mediums that Sonic did not recognise. From the few he did recognise (rosemary, parsley, mint and ' Huzzah! ' chilli flakes) he knew that they were were seasonings and spices.

The fridge, again of ginormous proportions, claimed it's own territory. The shiny front framing a distorted picture of the kitchen. A picture broken by an ice dispenser. 'An ice dispenser!?' At that moment, as though by some omnipotent force the fridge door slowly peeled itself from the rubber seal to reveal the glowing delights preserved within. Tender meats. Succulent fruits. Crispy veg. A tray of 32 eggs, 32! Thick blocks of butter. An array of classical cheeses. A wide bowled trifle, the cream unblemished but for the chocolate curls. A cake, chocolate by the looks of things, with candy floss pink strawberry icing lovingly smoothed on the topmost layer, middle mousse filling oozing out and teasing the lower layer of moist sponge. That was only what someone of a reduced height could see. It held more, hidden delights. Who knew what was chilling in the freezer. 'Uhn, I think I'm in heaven!'

A resounding thud pulled the hoglet from his gawking. 'Ugh, I thought was going to start drooling on the marble floor-' Shadow grimaced at the very notion. 'Still. My kitchen is rather impressive...'

A tad begrudgingly, Shadow had shut the fridge door to turn the little hedgie attention to himself. "Now. What do little hoglets have for a belated lunch, hmm?" The level of respect Shadow had in Sonic's book had risen due to the 'cooler than cucumber' kitchen complete with the many culinary possibilities that came with. However his peachy little face began to drop into an expression of irritation and suspicion, dragging the new found respect for Shadow down with it.

Cue over exaggerated gasp from the sarcastic mobian. "I know just the thing!" As Sonic's brow knitted together the ultimate lifeform carries on unperturbed. "Now you just just wait right there on ones of those chairs while I slave over a hot chopping board to make something good for you okay?" The question was clearly rhetorical, Sonic had no say in the matter as he was shooed in the direction of a minimalistic, alien looking dining table and chairs. 'How'd I miss this monstrosity?'

Shadow was gone the second his guest made his own progress towards the furniture. Leaving him to the task of mounting the chair that, again with the pompous proportions, forced him to climb into the seat. After taking a breather the child turned to see what his host was up to.

It came as a surprise to find The Ultimate Lifeform had donned an apron (minus the chef's hat-that was lying on the counter beside the spoons) to begin pottering around concocting something. He'd obviously decided to wait till the boys attention was occupied with scaling the chair before tying the whiter than white apron snugly against his form so as to help avoid the potential harassment such an accessory may attract.

Shadows sporadic movements coupled with the quick succession with which he completed each step of whatever recipe he was following prevented his audience from getting a decent look at his lunch.

After much neck strain the hedgie decided to give up and just take it as a surprise. Watching his feet, gauging the distance to the floor, the youngster wiggled his toes. The white cotton of the socks bending so as to keep the wriggly piggies contained. He was wearing a pair of Tails socks. His own now being a fair few sizes too big for a 4 year old. Tails had said something once about him having big feet, fairly common in hedgehogs and probably of some benefit to a sprinter like himself, the memory was cast aside abruptly as sustenance cascaded from above.

Shadow placed the plate down with purpose. Observing the blue figure seated inform of him looking up at the food held above his head, writhing with impatience as it was steadily lowered closer to the place mat.

Sonic took a big, deep breath. 'Sweet potato fries!?' He dug in.

Or would have.

If it wasn't for the hand on his chest. It pushed him further back into the seat, preventing his arms from being able to reach his lunch. Most put out, Sonic turned to look up at Shadow. Who for his part favoured his customer with a chastising frown.

"Wait." He commanded, left hand appearing from behind his side. Wielding a knife.

Silently he brought the blade down. In quick succession slicing the crusts clean of the sandwich. Finishing by cutting the food item into four small triangles.

Sonic scoffed. "What am I, four yea-?"

"Yes." Shadow raised his brow. "Your point being?" The hoglet resigned himself to grumbling.

"Gloves off. Eat your lunch." With that he was gone. Leaving Sonic to prise open the clasp that kept the gloves from slipping off. Task complete 'Finally!' He was free to indulge in the, 'Oh boy...' grilled sweet chilli chicken, grilled halloumi, crispy lettuce, grated carrot and beetroot, cucumber semicircles, spring onion, radish disks,sour cream, (not to mention a load of other ingredients he had yet to identify) sandwich. The bread toasted and of a variety Sonic didn't recall having being acquainted with before. '...stomach I hope you're ready for this!'

Tah-dah! I was drooling myself writing this (how many of you are thinking "EW! No, none of those ingredients go together!?" clearly I have no clue when it comes to cooking despite my obvious love of food)

I always imagine Shadow having a grand, plush, modern, pristine but slightly Gothic and 'antique' home. I have a plan for the next chapter and everything, I am so excited!

Hope I haven't lost you guys along the way with my lack of updates :C I promise to try to be better this time round ;)

Take care pallywags!

Till next time :)

Bletherskite