NOTE: This was going to be a one-shot but turned into a monster so here is Part 1 of 2!
There were many things in life that annoyed Mycroft Holmes. In fact, there were far too many things to even organize into a list. There were, however, a few that seemed to stand out among the multitude of annoyances found in this world; in particular, people and their assumptions drove Mycroft utterly insane. The most frequent, and perhaps most annoying assumption that people made, was that he was Rose's father rather than her brother.
One could potentially understand the confusion as one did not often find siblings with a twenty-two-year gap between the oldest and youngest outside of hideously large families of twelve or more children. People in the States somehow found those families amusing, interesting, and entertaining, giving them shows on the telly. Mycroft found even the mere thought of a family that large horrifying, though that might be in large part due to the fact that he had no real experience with children outside of his own siblings and the world wouldn't survive an entire 24 hours if there were twelve children like Sherlock and Rose in it. Clearly those families whose shows he'd seen advertisements for did not have children like his siblings; otherwise they would never have continued to procreate. Even now he'd still trade Sherlock for a dog; Rose he'd invested too much time in to trade for even the very best of dogs, not even one that came with a hunting lodge.
Even though there was a significant gap in their ages, as far as Mycroft was concerned, that was no reason to assume he was Rose's father then look at him with general alarm when he did not lay claim to the parentage of his rambunctious sister and then gape at him or ask awkward questions. This was, unfortunately, a process that had occurred on a fairly regular basis since the very beginning. Multiple examples of it were easily called to mind, such as time he'd taken Rose to the park in her pram for the umpteenth time…
Mycroft was utterly exhausted, and if he was exhausted, he could only imagine how run down his poor mother actually was. Oh, Maud Holmes put on a brave face and tutted at him when he suggested she go to bed and allow him to look after Rose, or turned down his offer to deal with Sherlock's latest misbehavior, and soldiered on because that is what a mother does. At least, that had been the case until Mother had come down with the flu, leaving her two sons to care for six-month-old Rose in order to keep the baby from getting sick.
It had only been three days and he could not for the life of him understand why people had children. Well, maybe he could; like when Rose smiled at him or cuddled against him and he felt like his heart- one he hadn't realized he'd actually had- melted. Right now, however, Mycroft couldn't imagine why anyone ever had children. At that moment he was taking Rose for the fourth walk that day, his sister tucked securely into her pram, apparently unable to sleep properly today without a walk first.
"Come on baby, you need to sleep," Mycroft pleaded. It was 6pm and he was trying so very, very desperately to get her to fall asleep so that he could get some work done and maybe even sleep himself tonight. Rose was not in a cooperative mood just then. In fact, she was wailing and flailing her little fists, her face all red and scrunched up with displeasure.
Suddenly he heard a feminine voice from behind them that seemed to be moving closer. "Aww, poor little thing," the woman cooed at Rose as she fell into step beside Mycroft. "Your daddy looks so tired little one, you should sleep so Daddy can too." Rose stopped crying, looking up at the new face and voice before letting out a little coo.
"How old? Lillian, by the way," the woman introduced herself. She'd never been able to resist a man with a baby.
"Six months," Mycroft responded. "And I'm not her father. I'm twenty-two, which is a ridiculous age to begin reproducing."
"Not her father?" Lillian repeated. "But… she belongs to you, somehow, right?" He didn't look like a kidnapper, but who knew these days.
"No, she doesn't." Mycroft's eyes widened as he realized the mistake he'd just made. "She's my sister."
Lillian didn't look convinced but was undecided about whether to call the police now or back off a bit first. In the end she chose not to call them at all as Mycroft was recognized by one of the neighborhood women who called a greeting, inquired about his mother, and promised to bring soup the following day.
Then there was that time at the surgery….
Two-year-old Rose was clinging to Mycroft like a vine to the side of an unkempt house, her face flush with fever, her hand tugging once more at her left ear.
"Rose, I know your ear hurts, but pulling on it won't make it better," he murmured, gently moving her hand away from her ear. "We'll be in to see the doctor soon and get something so you feel better. My poor little poppet." Mycroft kissed the top of her head and gently rubbed circles on her back as they approached the check-in. "Rosenwyn Holmes, we have an appointment with Dr. Hathaway," he said to the receptionist.
"Aw, Daddy cuddles are the best cuddles when you don't feel good, aren't they lovey?" the receptionist asked, smiling at the sick toddler.
Mycroft sighed heavily and rolled his eyes; here they went again! "She's not my child, she's…"
"Then what are you doing with her if she's not your child?" The receptionist interrupted, looking well and truly puzzled. Not alarmed, not yet anyway, just puzzled.
"Is there some sort of unspoken rule I don't know about, that only allows fathers and mothers to bring sick children in? I'm her eldest brother and, if you bothered to check your paperwork, also her legal guardian, invested with all the legal authority one could ever need to authorize any sort of care she should ever require while on this earth," Mycroft ground out. "Authority granted by our mother, who just happens to be at a conference in Macedonia at this very moment, though I fail to see how that is really any of your concern. Now are we going to continue to play twenty questions or are you going to get us in to a see the doctor sometime this century?" Had he not been holding a sensitive and ill little girl, his words would have been accompanied by considerable shouting.
Though he was only twenty-four, Mycroft had the uncanny ability to unsettle and intimidate anyone and everyone, with or without bellowing. Well, not the Queen, but she was the Queen after all! Anyone else, even people twice his age, snapped to attention and followed his instructions to the letter; just like the receptionist that was now hurrying back to speak with other personnel.
"That's the brother. Mr. Holmes is the brother and he's going to be very, very angry if you mistake him for Mr. Holmes the dad," she warned the nurse. "Be sure to tell the doctor, alright? No, stop laughing at me!"
The nurse snickered at her colleague. "He's the same age as you, holding a sick toddler, how upsetting can he really be? Pull yourself together Jill!"
"Well he was. Just… like the most intense vibes ever coming off that guy," the receptionist hissed. "You do what you like, but I warned you, Sue, I warned you!"
"Right this way with your charge Brother Holmes!" Nurse Sue called cheerfully, waving Mycroft over. "I'll take you back to the doctor now." Exactly three minutes later, Sue left for the loo in tears, while Jill just shook her head.
There were literally dozens, even hundreds, of times over the years that Mycroft had found it necessary to correct people or, more often than not, answer tersely that Rose did not belong to him. Generally that statement was followed by a look of confusion on the face of the other party. Rose would then respond by stretching out his name in a whine of "Myyyyyyyyyyy!" as if he was doing something wrong when most often it was Rose being returned to him after committing some sort of mischief.
Yet never in his infinite wisdom did he think that one day his reflex answer to the question of "Does this child belong to you?" would result in the events of today. As he recalled prior issues of claiming or not claiming Rose, he wondered how precisely he had missed this as within the realm of possibilities. 'This' being that he was, at that very moment, handcuffed and waiting with growing impatience for his turn at a battered old phone, pondering which of the possible methods of murdering someone he'd enjoy most.
Finally it was Mycroft's turn and he took the phone, struggling a bit with the awkwardness of being handcuffed and dialing said phone. He waited, becoming angrier by the second, as the line rang and rang until finally someone answered at the other end.
"Mother, your child had me arrested," Mycroft ground out, sounding ready to snap.
Three Hours Before the Call
If he hadn't seen it for himself, Mycroft would never believe it. Rosenwyn Holmes, the girl who jumped off balconies, watched in fascination as her blood was drawn at surgery, and tried to drive the bloody car when she was six and a half, was absolutely terrified…
…Of the dentist.
And also was currently in the middle of gigantic strop about having to go see the dreaded dentist. Generally Mycroft was quick to deal with tantrums, but this one was clearly caused by genuine fear; not to mention the fact that she'd crawled under her bed and would not come out no matter what he threatened to do to her if she didn't.
"Rose, this is getting to be a bit ridiculous. You've been to the dentist many, many times and never have you been this upset about it," Mycroft pointed out. This was probably the most awkward conversation he'd ever had, lying on his stomach looking under the bed at a very upset eight-year-old.
"But he went away! My dentist went away and this one might make it hurt very, very much!" Rose wailed. Every time Mycroft reached out to try and grab her, she'd kick at him and continue to cry. "He's going to use the old tools like we saw at the museum and you can't tell me he won't because you don't know him either, he's new and he could be the most horrible dentist ever in all the whole world!"
"That's not even grammatically correct," Mycroft ground out. "Will you please just come out from there? I am very tired of having this conversation on the floor and getting kicked at. And if you weren't so frightened, for no good reason I might add, you'd have a very sore bottom coming your way for all this nonsense. Will you please come out? Please."
"NO!"
"If you come out and stop your crying, I promise I'll get you a treat after we go to the dentist. I'll stay in the room with you, you can bring Teddy to hold, and I'll make certain you're alright. Afterwards, if you're a good girl, I'll take you to the store for a treat," Mycroft promised. The fact that he was offering a bribe indicated that he was very, very desperate indeed.
"You promise? Promise everything will be okay? You'll protect me?" Rose asked, her shouting dying down to sniffles and trailing tears.
"Of course," Mycroft answered immediately. "I also don't think that your dentist that retired would let someone who wasn't good take his place. But I'll be there either way. Come on out." He moved away from the bed, giving her space to crawl out from under it. Once she did, he hugged her tightly, still baffled by her fear, history museum visit aside. Those instruments had been over one hundred years old, after all! Who exactly did she think this new dentist might be?
"I want something new for my baby," Rose murmured. "When we go to the store."
"So not ice cream then?"
Rose shook her head. "We have ice cream here. Constanza would like something nice for herself and she's been a very good baby."
Mycroft sighed heavily. He knew he should have specified the store and/or treat. There would be no going back on it now, even if Rose practically had her own toy store in the playroom. "Well then you'll just have to be the very best little girl you can be for me, hm? Be good and brave, like I know you can be."
Ninety Minutes Before the Call
They'd been here forever, Mycroft thought to himself. How long did it take one to pick out paraphernalia for a doll, for god sakes? He let Rose wander and examine and mostly wandered the aisles himself, not particularly interested in looking at doll dresses or yet more dress up clothes. He didn't miss the odd looks from various store workers, as even Mycroft would admit he must look incredibly out of place in this store, particularly since Rose was not at his side.
It had been foolish for Mycroft to leave Rose unattended. She was eight, the store was practically empty, and he could keep an eye on her well enough while staying far away from the offensively pink aisles.
Or so he'd thought.
"Rose, have you picked something out yet? We've been here thirty minutes already and I have better things to do today," Mycroft grumbled as he entered the row where he'd left her. Rose, however, was not there. In fact, she was across the store, playing in the display bouncy house, much to the chagrin of store employees.
"Can I help you with something, sir?" A young female store employee asked. "Trying to buy a present for a little girl? It can be very daunting." She smiled. "Did you have anything particular in mind, sir?"
Unwilling to admit he couldn't at the precise moment in time find Rose, Mycroft merely gave the girl a tight smile. "While I appreciate your kind offer, I'm merely browsing with no actual intention of purchasing anything in particular."
"Um… Well, alright then," she said. "My name is Jane, if you decide you'd like some help." Giving the man one last smile, she scurried away to another part of the store.
"Guys, there's this super weird dude over in the girl toys, doll aisles," Jane told her fellow employees. "He's in this freaking expensive suit and alone and it's weird. He didn't want any help when I offered."
As the employees discussed the strange well dressed man seemingly prowling the doll items, Rose was being ushered out of the bouncy house by a male employee. "Come along now, you've had enough play time," the teenage boy named Jason decided. "Come out. We need to find your parents and we don't really let anyone play in these. It's just display and there's legal things if you get hurt."
"I won't get hurt," Rose promised, but exited the bouncy house just the same. Before Jason could escort her to the front to page her parents, the little girl scurried away, returning to the doll aisle. This time, her eyes fell on the exact thing she wanted for her doll. Way up on a high shelf, it was a horse drawn carriage big enough for a doll Constanza's size. How had she possibly missed that before?! Without stopping to think about finding help from an adult, Rose began scaling the shelves. Luckily for her, the shelves were sturdy enough not to be thrown off by the weight of a small eight-year-old climbing them; unluckily for her, the toys were not secured to the shelves. By the time she reached the horse drawn carriage, there was a considerable number of toys that had fallen to the floor.
By this time, Mycroft had wandered over to the DVD and book section of the store, thinking that Rose may have changed her mind about what she wanted as a reward for being well behaved at the dentist. Thus he missed her return to the doll aisle and her subsequent climb of the shelves, until the sound of objects falling caught his attention.
No.
It couldn't be.
Then again, it was Rose.
So, yes, it not only could be but it was also very likely to be his sister wreaking havoc once again. And then it came, the question he so very much dreaded, from a young male employee who appeared to be named Jason.
"Sir? We've uh… well… there's a little girl creating a mess over in the doll area. She wouldn't happen to belong to you, would she?" Jason asked, hopeful he'd found the girl's parent.
"No," Mycroft responded. No, he most certainly was not responsible for bringing that utter hoyden into this world, nor was he going to take the credit for doing so. "No, she is most certainly not mine." Yet despite laying no claim to the child in question, he hastily made his way towards the sounds of chaos, imagining the costs of the possible damage Rose could have inflicted. Clearly, Rose got her destructive tendencies from Sherlock because he had certainly never been a destructive child!
"I think that's your dad looking for you," the employee named Jane told Rose as Mycroft could be seen heading in their direction.
Rose looked where Jane was pointing and saw a very angry Mycroft was in fact heading her way, clearly not amused that she was sitting on the floor among a pile of thirty or so toys that had come off the shelves during her climb up and down them.
"That's not my daddy," Rose murmured. The words that followed her true statement, however, had not been considered for more than three seconds time before she blurted them out, intending nothing more than to delay the inevitable bottom warming she had coming. "He's not my daddy, he kidnapped me."
Jane gasped, immediately taking the child at her word. One always heard about those things on the news and she had just known there was something off about this fancy guy wandering around the store. The little girl must have climbed the shelves to get her attention and find help! "Come with me," she said firmly, whisking Rose away before the little girl could say anything. Jane waved over the security guard, who had seen everything from his little office in the back of the store. She whispered something in his ear.
"What's going on?" Rose asked, suddenly feeling rather alarmed.
"Don't worry sweetheart, we're going to get you home to your loved ones and that man won't ever bother you again," Jane responded, pulling her mobile out of her pocket to dial 999.
Mycroft entered the aisle and watched with confusion as Rose was taken away by a store employee. "Where are they going?" he asked Jason, who had accompanied him back to the aisle.
"I'm not sure," Jason admitted.
"Sir, I'm going to ask you to come with me," the security guard said in a stern, authoritative tone.
"Excuse me?' Mycroft asked, arching an eyebrow.
The guard didn't ask a second time and, trying to be the hero of the day, promptly tackled Mycroft. A tussle ensued as Mycroft fought to get an upper hand over the security officer and had he not been so caught off guard, Mycroft would easily have won the struggle. Unfortunately for him, the element of surprise- because who in their wildest dreams envisioned being tackled by a security guard while at the toy store with their sibling?- worked in the guard's favor and Mycroft was dragged to the officer's office.
Eight minutes later, Mycroft Holmes was in handcuffs and under arrest.
"I'm telling you, I did not kidnap her! She's my little sister and we're still allowed to take sisters shopping in this country!" Mycroft shouted as he was shoved into the police vehicle. "Whatever she told the employee was a complete lie. Take a good look at us man, we even look alike!"
"Save it for your trial," the police officer responded.
Present
She simply could not have heard her eldest son correctly, Maud thought to herself. Mycroft? Arrested? "Mikey, this is not funny at all and you're far too old to be playing these sorts of tricks on your mother."
"Mother," Mycroft ground out. "Your child had me arrested for kidnapping. This is very, very far from being a joke."
Maud sighed heavily "Well, Mikey, if you'd just stop answering the question "Does this child belong to you?" with "No" then this might not have happened," she pointed out.
"Well she didn't have to tell them I kidnapped her! That's quite the leap from eldest brother to random stranger abducting her off the bloody street," Mycroft replied tersely. "She told them I kidnapped her and then didn't bother to tell them 'never mind, I was merely kidding' when I was handcuffed and shoved into a police vehicle. Please, please come down here and sort this out. They won't listen to me and I have no idea where Rose is, but you'll likely be getting a call from them asking you to claim her at any moment. Please Mother."
Maud could hear the strain in her oldest son's voice and it tugged at her heartstrings. Her baby! Handcuffed! Because of another of her babies! "I'll be right there Myc," she promised. "I'll get to the bottom of this and sort it out as quickly as I can."
From the second that police officers had shown up at the toy store, the enormity of what her words had caused slammed into Rose. Immediately she tried to tell not only the store employees but the officers that she hadn't meant it and My was her My, her brother, not a kidnapper. No one believed her and she couldn't understand why. Instead, all they kept telling her was not to worry, she was safe and would be home with her family soon.
When she arrived at Scotland Yard with an officer, she was passed off to a different one, who promised to reunite her with her family and again ignored her words. Mycroft was in very real trouble and Rose had put him in it and when he got out of it, Rose knew he was going to kill her. Kill her dead and she knew she'd deserve it. Already the guilt of having caused such a fuss and put her brother into such a serious situation was settled heavy and uncomfortable in her belly.
Then, she saw the one person in the world that could make all of this right. "Mummy!" she shouted, running across the room and threw her arms around her mother, clinging to her.
Maud returned her little one's hugs with a sigh. "Oh my darling Rose, what have you done?" she asked, sounding disappointed.
"I didn't know this would happen and I tried to tell them I didn't mean it and they wouldn't believe me," Rose hurriedly explained. "They took Mycroft away and I don't know where he is and he's never ever gonna forgive me Mummy. He won't ever, ever for my whole life." The little girl burst into distraught tears.
"Of course he will baby, he loves you," Maud promised, kissing Rose's face. "I'm sure it goes without saying that you're in trouble?"
Rose nodded miserably. "I'm sorry Mummy, I'm very sorry!"
"I know baby. We'll worry about all that later. Be a good girl for Mummy now and wait quietly while I take care of things so we can all go home."
In Maud's view, convincing the police that Rose's claim was false took far longer than it should have. Eventually, however, the police came to understand that the littlest Holmes was quite silly and mischievous and never expected such a silly comment to be taken seriously, let alone get her brother arrested. Once they'd realized this was not a true case of kidnapping, Rose got quite the blistering telling off from the officer who had been assigned to watch her; one that left the little girl in tears and prompted heartfelt promises that she would never do something like this ever again.
This scolding was nothing compared to the wrath of her big brother. Mycroft, upon being released, glared at the little girl, his eyes practically boring holes into her. Despite being pleased that he was alright, Rose hesitated briefly before approaching her big brother while he collected his belongings from an officer. Looking rather skittish, she moved towards him cautiously before saying, "My?" in a teeny tiny voice.
Mycroft gave her a final glare before signing the last of the paperwork and stalking out of the building, leaving a stunned Rose in his wake.
"He's just angry, Rose, and with good reason. Give him some time to cool down," Maud soothed. She held Rose's hand and gave it a squeeze, only to feel the little girl slip away and hurry after her brother.
"My! Mycroft! My, wait!" Mycroft hadn't gone very far, but it was a much longer distance for Rose to cover with her shorter legs than it was for Mycroft. She caught up to him fairly quickly and reached out to tug on his coat to get his attention.
Before she could do so, however, Mycroft whirled around to face her, his face red with anger. "What? What could you possibly have to say to me to make this better?! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?!" His voice had started off tight and clipped but quickly became louder until he was outright bellowing. Mycroft ignored Rose's wide eyes and the step she took away from him. Still towering over her, Mycroft leaned down enough to take a firm hold of her shoulders and gave her one good shake before continuing to shout, his hands still on her shoulders. "HOW COULD YOU?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!"
Rose whimpered when Mycroft gave her a firm shake, the color draining from her face. She cringed as he continued to shout at her, tears beginning to streak down her cheeks. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry My, I'm sorry!" she finally shouted to be heard over his bellowing.
"Oh no, you're not," Mycroft growled. "Not yet, but you will be; I can promise you that. The second we get home I'm taking a belt to your backside until you aren't able to sit for an entire week. Do you hear me? You are going to be the sorriest little girl in the entire United Kingdom! STOP CRYING AT ONCE!" he ordered, giving her another shake.
At just that moment Maud exited the building, having finally finished signing her own set of forms, and saw Mycroft scream at Rose and give her a shake. "MYCROFT!" She shouted, running in their direction. "MYCROFT HOLMES!"
Hearing his mother's voice sliced through the veil of red hot anger and Mycroft immediately released his little sister. The little girl was then scooped up by their mother, who was glaring daggers at him. "Get in the car Mycroft," she ordered tersely before turning all her attention to her littlest.
Rose clung to her mother, sobbing hysterically. Maud could feel her little body trembling and held on to her baby that much tighter. "Shhh, shhhh," she soothed as Rose tried to apologize through her tears. "It's alright baby, it's alright. Mummy's here, and I love you and Mycroft loves you. He's angry right now, but there's no reason to be scared; you know he would never hurt you Rose, ever." Her heart broke for both her babies just then, knowing Mycroft would be devastated when he realized how much he'd frightened Rose.
"We're going to go home now baby, alright? Mummy is going to take you and Mycroft home and then you and I are going to talk very calmly about today in your room," Maud told her daughter. That the talk would include a spanking was a detail that they could worry about later.
Rose shook her head. "Mummy, My said-"
"I don't care what Mycroft said about it," Maud interrupted. "Don't worry about anything Mycroft said. Just you and Mummy will talk. Mycroft loves you darling and he didn't mean to be so harsh with you. He was very scared by what happened today, just like you were. But we'll sort it out, I promise baby. Let's go home now, hmm?" She dabbed at Rose's tears with a handkerchief before carrying her over to the car.
The ride back to the Holmes residence was quiet and tense, with not a word spoken until the vehicle pulled into the driveway. "Rose, go upstairs to your room please, I'll be up shortly," Maud said quietly. The little girl hurried into the house, leaving the two adults in the car.
"Mycroft, I know you're angry," Maud began. "And you have every right to be, but you're too angry. You're a good man and a loving brother, but I can see in your eyes that you're still too angry to deal with her. And that's alright, you can be angry as long as you wish, but you'll never forgive yourself if you're too hard on her. Later on you and Rose can make amends with one another, but for now, I'll handle Rose."
Yes, he was angry, yes, he'd made Rose cry, but Mycroft couldn't help thinking Mother must be exaggerating a bit. Still, he wasn't going to fight with his mother over who got to spank Rose for her latest misdemeanor. "Of course Mother," he agreed.
Mycroft followed her inside the house and disappeared into his study, surprised to find his mother right behind him. "Mother?" he asked.
"I believe you've got my spanking spoon in that drawer of yours, and I'll need that," Maud explained.
"Yes, it has come to find its way in here," Mycroft admitted, moving to retrieve it from the drawer. It had been quite some time since Mother had spanked anyone in the house, a good five years at least. As he handed it over, a thought occurred to him. "Have you ever spanked her?"
Maud frowned in thought. "You know, I don't think I have," she admitted with a chuckle.
"She's very wiggly," Mycroft warned her. Seconds later he frowned. "Why am I telling you that? You've had plenty of practice on Sherlock after all. Enough practice for a lifetime of naughty children."
"Well you weren't exactly an angel yourself, Mycroft, though you were considerably better behaved than Sherlock," she admitted. Maud was pleased that he seemed much calmer now, as if his own anger had exhausted him.
"Did you really get arrested?" Sherlock asked, barging into the room. "Did Rose really get you arrested? Handcuffs and everything?" The scowl on his older brother's face answered the question and the middle Holmes laughed. "She's a genius! I've never thought of that! I wonder how she did? That's brilliant! Are there mug shots I can see?"
This was going downhill quickly as Maud could practically feel Mycroft tensing. "Sherlock, please don't encourage your sister's misbehavior by calling it brilliant. And especially don't tell her that you approve of it. In fact, I forbid you to congratulate her on this because it is not congratulation worthy."
Sherlock sighed heavily. "Mug shots?" he asked hopefully. When Mycroft's face went red, he started laughing again.
"William Sherlock Scott Holmes! Do not laugh at your brother's misfortune," Maud ordered, giving him a stern look. "I am holding the spanking spoon after all." She was immensely pleased when Sherlock instantly stopped smirking.
"My misfortune?" Mycroft sputtered. "My misfortune?!"
Rolling her eyes Maud pulled Sherlock out of the study by his ear. "Leave your brother be, Sherlock. Nineteen or no nineteen, you live in this house and I will spank you if you rile him up any further. Is that understood?"
Sherlock's face flushed a scarlet color. Embarrassment. How very, very dull and ordinary. Would she really do that though? And was he willing to chance that she would? "Understood," he replied.
"Thank you." Maud kissed his cheek before heading upstairs to deal with her littlest.
TO BE CONTINUED!