"Hey there cutie" Gahk! Where'd she come from? "you lost?" No. No I am not lost! "Don't worry kiddo I'll help you find your way back." Didn't you hear me!? I said…. Actually… my lips feel glued shut… did I say any of that out loud? "Not to worry, come on!"
To be honest it was a little cruel. Even Shadow had to admit to that one. Worth it though. The look on his face? Priceless! Resisting the urge to prance, which would make him look so un-Shadow it'd be unreal, the hedgehog made his way out of the shopping centre. He barely noticing the awkward glances passersby gave him. One look at that evil mischievous grin had people scootching out of his way. Wow, no Sonic and personal space. Now if only the commander would leave me alone -everything would be perfect!
Obvcourse everything was not perfect. His phone had not stopped it's incessant ringing until he set it to silent. Then it started it's incessant rumbling. If it wasn't for the fact that he'd left his charge in the nursery and policy stated they must have the contact details of all parents in case of emergencies (Shadow suspected the girl completing their paperwork prejudged him as 'liable to conveniently forget to pick up his kid', clearly she was a rather good judge of character) he'd have thrown the phone into the irritatingly hypnotic water fountain.
Since it seemed to be far more bother than it was worth to ignore the commander (lest he find some of his 'colleagues' had let themselves into his apartment) Shadow was going to visit the wretched man. I'll take the scenic route. Naturally. Though how he'd explain this little ditty (ie being dumped with a miniature version of his iconic world saving rival) he didn't know. Thankfully he had a lovely lengthy walk to think about it.
One little hedgehog had a rather short walk out of confusion and into… well… he hasn't figured that out yet...
He could only watch Shadows retreating back spines, leaving through the 'shoulder height for the average adult' button controlled sliding doors, as a young woman with a sugary lilt to her voice pulled him by the arm through a new set of doors. Going further into the belly of the beast, Sonic was too busy trying to get a decent footing to listen to the female attempting to allay his potential fears.
Suddenly he was pushed to the front and ushered into a bright room with irritatingly happy cartoon characters at every turn. He stumbled forwards, and by the time he'd regained his balance a new woman had grabbed his arm. Pulled into the middle of the room and announced to every munchkin in the vicinity that he was the new boy and was to be included in all games and everyone was to be nice to him. After which Sonic was once again pushed forwards by a slender hand on the small of his back and told to "go play" for no better reason than "it's play time".
Apparently the nursery nurse was magic as she vanished into thin air before the little hedgehog could turn around and voice his protests. Fantastic.
Donning his best 'Frowny Face' the azure mammal surveyed the room in greater detail. He could only roll his eyes at the smiley faces. They were everywhere… on the walls, the carpet underfoot, books, toys, the curtains, the ceiling fan, the white board, chairs, tables and "Gahk!"
"Hello!" The children to… apparently… "My name is Princess Unicorn-" You gotta be kidding me…"-what's your name new blue kid?" Sigh….
"Er… Hi. My name's Ss-" Wait! You can't say Sonic you idiot! "-sss… Erm… My er… My name?" Come on 'Fastest Thing Alive'! What's the matter? Your brain can't keep up? Come on you idiot, think! "My name. Well, it's…" … Maybe Shadow put a different name on my form? Yeah.. but that means I'll have to use that and I have no idea what it might be…"I-I… Don't know…" Nice.
"Dat's okay. I'll name you!" Congratulations you are officially an idiot hedgehog! " You're blue right?"
"Uh-huh."
"I'll name you Blueticus!" Whaticus!? "But you can be Blue for short!" Huh… that's actually not that bad…
So the newly dubbed Blueticus was dragged away by the small grinning girl and forced to play all manner of games. From lego, to house. Though everyone's favourite had to be 'In and Out the Dusty Bluebells'. I think I'm going to explode if I am forced to sing that song one more time… Yes I am blue. Crazy childrens, why won't the joke just get old already!? "Okay children Lunch Time!"
Shadows detour had, perhaps, taken him though a rather well-to-do coffee shop for an extortionately priced afternoon tea. Hey, Ultimate Life Forms need food to…. Because he's worth it! He decided it was time to head out to the base and see what his 'boss' has to say. Patting the corners of his mouth with the cloth napkin the agent stood with an air of dignity and serenity.
Heading to the 'Lunch Room' in a higgledy-piggledy line one little hedgehog was rather easily giving into temptation. There were so many open doors, so many opportunities to make a break for freedom! All he had to do was zip left or right when heads were turned and he was home free! "OW!" all eyes turned to the direction of the noise. Apparently a little crocodile boy had fallen over and hurt his knee. The cries attracted the attention of the children but most importantly the caretakers. Bingo! Slipping into a neighbouring room under the radar posed little to know challenge. The room was merely a supply cupboard, boxes of sealed crayons, flat pack tables and chairs were a few things identified using the slither of light seeping through the open gap the ajar door provided. All he had to do was wait for the drama to end, the line to move along and the corridor to clear. Ah sweet success!
The building shook with the force of the door slamming. "Grrrrr!" His outburst was undignified and he was to say the very least not so calm anymore…. How dare he! The ebony hedgehog stormed down the grey rabbit warren corridors, lights flickering into life as he barged past their sensors. How dare he demand anything from me! Turning abruptly on his heel he swung to the left, coming face to face with a door and a palm recognition security system. I could leave this place a smoking crater in the ground! His left hand clawed at the clasp of his right glove until the catch began to loosen. But I spare them that fate all because I made a promise- With a resounding SLAM his now gloveless palm made contact with the panel. - to be nice to the people on earth. The door admitted him entrance though it was a moot point, he'd of forced his way in anyway. Here I am, acting like a complete mug, being 'nice'- Yes, Shadows sparing them the crater thing is, in his own mind at least, his being 'nice'. - and what do I get for it? Dragging the white cloth up his bare arm, the right glove was pulled into place with a snap. 'Shadow I want you to report in regularly', 'Shadow I want you to train the child', 'Shadow we'll send someone to assess your apartment', 'Shadow I'm sending you a mound of paperwork to fill in', 'Shadow don't just go adopting random children because you feel sorry for them or I'll think you've gone soft' In the time Shadow had taken to have this inner rant in his head he had blazed a trail out of the facility and was standing in the 'vehicle storage area' panting in rage. 'Oh and Shadow?...Shadow it might be good for you' Taking an almighty big breath in, Shadow released it with a Chaos Spear thrown in the direction of a nearby spy drone. And…. relax…
"Hey there cutie" Gahk! Where'd she come from? "you lost?" No. No I am not lost! "Don't worry kiddo I'll help you find your way back." Didn't you hear me!? I said…. Actually… my lips feel glued shut… did I say any of that out loud? "Not to worry, come on!"
Other than make frustrated noises, Sonic found himself unable to do anything to stop himself being dragged back the way he came (he thinks, to be honest he was a little lost…) and soon found himself sat down at a table with 7 or so other children. A plate of turkey dinosaurs, baby carrots, an icecream scoop of mashed potato, a blob of mushy broccoli, a dribble of gravy and a drink of orange juice was put down before him. Clearly this was a no cutlery kind of place. Okay…. Not what I, yeah…
Chancing a glance at the other munchkins in his vacinity left him with a reduced appetite. Turns out the recently acquainted 'Princess Unicorn' did not have the manners of royalty, instead she had somehow got a tomato based sauce all over her face and dress. 'Weird…. I don't see any tomato-ee sauce on any plates….?' A pig kid across from him was shoving the carrots up his nose. The rabbit boy opposite him created a lovely artistic screen with the medium available- the mashed potato a hill, the dinosaur stood upright in it as though taking a stroll, a broccoli bush with orange carroty flowers and a gravy river. The large badger girl taking up his seat and elbow room to the right chewed with her mouth open for a while before sticking her face into the plate and seeing what she could catch. 'Okay, I thought I was a sloppy eater but I will try harder in future so that I never make anyone ever again feel the way I do now!'
As a matter of fact it took the sickened Sonic so long to force his food down his throat that when all of the children were called back for playtime he still had a sizeable amount preserved on his plastic plate. The budding designer to had much still on his plate perhaps not wanting to disturb the delicate balance of the masterpiece before him Sonic mused. The staff had come to inspect their poor efforts at eating and in an effort to 'encourage' them had mixed everything on both boys plates up. Sonics desire was not renewed with the rearrangement of food stuffs and although the heathens responsible for the bile in his throat had left, the urge to reach had not. The rabbit was much worse off. Appalled at the complete and utter disregard for beauty and the ruination of the accumulation of his life's work, the child merely stared down at the massacre in front of him with a barren empty expression. The despair was predominantly inward, seems this sort of indecent act was common in the boy's experience of eating.
His blue contemporary felt sorry for the kid but also…. "Shame that… that dino looked like he was having fun…." awkward…
Wide amber eyes looked up at him.
... Really awkward.
I am so sorry this has taken me so long! I hope you have enjoyed this installment. I have been writing this in bits so I'm not sure whether the style consistency is off but constructive criticism is most welcome!
I have been reading more than writing (A LOT of sonamy it seems…) and have been busy and I am sorry! I'm not promising any improvements on update regularity but I am continuing all of my fics (including HP its just the thought of all the angst! No Lou, power through!)
Thinking of trying to do a few one-shots to try to get me back into the swing of things so please let me know if you have any ideas (Sonic related please ;) ) I'd love to give 'em a go, apologies if I don't fulfill your request but I shall try :)
Thanks for reading pallywags
Take care!
E-198Lou