Splat X: The Bate Bros.
"What's a Metal Gear?"
Splin and Sharq rested in their beds, staring at the still broken ceiling of their house, the Skell encounter a distant memory. Well, about as distant as your eyes are to these words typed on this screen. ...That means it was still recently fresh in their minds!
The other three Inklings of unfathomable power sat in the room, Ix lying down on a couch, resting nearby, discussing something with his sibling and mother. Splin and Sharq just kinda laid there, listening while resting.
"I don't find much of a point in fixing the roof anymore." Splin said, staring up at the hole in the ceiling. "If it just keeps getting broken, I'm not spending all this money on it."
"What money?" Sharq asked.
Splin blinked. "...Right."
Suddenly, Maria perked up. "Tenta…? She's going to attack Inkopolis? How? From what Rem told me, the Metal Gear she used is more suitable for water-based transport. Inkopolis is-" Maria paused, her eyes growing wide. "Oh, no."
"What would she even want to attack for? I get she's insane and all, but there's no value in it…" Ix questioned, sitting back down into the couch, Splin and Sharq going to lean on said furniture to hear the conversation.
Splin was now fully interested in the conversation. He chimed in, raising a finger. "Um, what's a Metal Gear exactly?"
Maria turned to the brothers. "Ok, you know the Skell?" The two nodded. "Now imagine that, but covered in machine guns, rail cannons, and is able to launch Nuclear Bombs."
Splin and Sharq blinked confusedly, not entirely well versed in what all of the weapons were exactly.
They got lots of firepower, guys.
The two brothers "aahed" in understanding, looking back to Maria.
"Of course, they come in all shapes and sizes." She finished.
"Back to the value of attacking Inkopolis…" A mysterious voice joined in. "She would probably want to cause wide-spread panic, weakening the forces and allowing her to launch a full-scale attack."
The owner of the voice revealed herself, appearing in the house. Tek herself, the Octo-Inkling hybrid entered with a puff of smoke, cyan ashes falling to the floor.
"WAH!"
The brothers jumped off the couch, startled, hiding behind the furniture, shifting into squid form as if it would help them. Sounds of ink weapons being drawn prompted them to flatten themselves across the floor beneath the couch. The two shivered slightly, watching the feet of the characters in the house shuffle ever so slightly. They stayed under the couch for a while, until the sound of sobbing attracted the brothers. Sharq slid out first, Splin grasping for him with a weary tentacle, ultimately sliding out with him.
Sharq reverted to humanoid form, walking over to the three as well as the new house intruder. "What's wrong?"
All of a sudden, Ix's voice echoed in his head. "She had abusive parents. Even her twin sister abused her. Sis and I have met them. Long story short, Callie and Marie had to take legal action to stop them from 'taking us back'."
"Wait, so we can talk through our minds?" Sharq wondered, a slightly gleeful thought going through his mind, tapping the side of his head with an idea in his head. "Splin, can you hear me?"
"It requires training, Sharq." Ix frowned disappointedly, walking back to Maria.
"Aw…" Sharq sighed.
Hey, if it helps, I can just relay your thoughts to Splin.
"Voice?" Sharq asked.
Uh huh, wait a minute. Hey Splin, Sharq wants you to come out of the couch.
A slight banging noise from under the couch could be heard, as a disgruntled Splin crawled out of the couch, rubbing his now humanoid head underneath his headphones.
"Shouldn't have been so quick to leave." Splin grumbled.
"That's amazing!" Sharq grinned, then glanced at the others, coughing nervously. "Sorry, meant to whisper there."
"Splin, Sharq?" Ix said, grabbing the brothers attention.
"Yeah?" Splin asked.
"The instant you hear screaming…" Ix began, adopting a serious face, glaring at the two brothers cautiously. "...you need to evacuate wherever KRAKEN is and where it will go. Got it?"
The two nodded, Maria and Rem smiling nearby. Maria cleared her throat. "So, you lot want some food, I presume?" Maria asked, her offspring nodding, Tek remaining rather indifferent however.
Splin sighed. "I think I'll just get some fresh air."
Sharq nodded. "I'll come with you."
Maria waved to the two brothers, who left their house, sitting outside almost as soon as they got the chance.
Splin stared at the sky, a bright blue illuminated by the yellow sun. "Hmm…"
"What, debating the logics of the universe again?" Sharq asked with a smirk.
"Somewhat. Things haven't been as… Simple lately, to say the least. I mean, sounds like a broken record, I know, but come on." Splin gestured inside, where a reluctant Tek was offered a seat by the counter.
"Well, what is simple?" Sharq asked. "You keep going on about, 'wishing things will go back to normal'. What exactly is normal?"
Splin turned to Sharq with an eyebrow raised. "When were you a philosophist?"
"I'm just saying man, you can't complain about things not being normal when they haven't really BEEN normal, get what I mean?" Sharq said.
"...Yeah, I suppose."
The two sat in silence, breathing in the fresh air of the hills, looking down at the grass and sky, birds nearby flapping gentle wings above.
"Hmm." Splin looked up.
"What's up?" Sharq asked.
"I think I'll take a walk, just to clear my head, you know?" Splin said.
"Alright. Be home soon, I can't prepare against the Metal Gear alone!" Sharq said.
Splin nodded, turning into a squid. He leapt off towards Inkopolis, Sharq waving on the hills, going back inside the house.
"Hey, so Splin left for the plaza-" Sharq halted.
Three cephalopod teenagers were currently devouring food at the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight. Maria stood by, taking a glance at Sharq, and shrugged, smiling. The three eating paused for a moment, glanced over at Sharq, took a napkin, and all wiped their faces. They proceeded to go back to their lunch, Sharq blinking, ignoring the oddities of the three, moving towards his bed. Taking his Splatendo 3DS nearby, buy it now for all your holiday needs, he sat down on his bed, and began playing, sounds of feasting in the background.
Splin landed in the plaza, stumbling to land straight on his feet. Barely keeping himself from tripping, he straightened himself up, looking around. The plaza was busy as always, Inklings walking in and out of shops in the Booyah Base with new purchases. Splin began walking away from the plaza, leaving the barriers, walking out into the sidewalks of the city, looking around at all the sights and sounds. Despite the multiple recent robotic attack reports courtesy of Callie and Marie, it seemed like none of the citizens were too concerned with anything, blissfully walking along through shops and restaurants like normal.
Splin eventually tired of walking, sitting by a bench, slumping downwards, staring at the sky. "...Hi." He spoke, seemingly no one around to hear. "You're seeing how strange the circumstances have gotten, haven't you? Were things this odd when you were here?"
Splin was answered with the sounds of cars driving past, pigeons and gulls above cawing occasionally.
"...Guess that's a 'no', huh?" Splin said, staring at the clouds. "...I don't blame you for not answering, you're probably busy somewhere."
The young brother sat on the bench for a while, standing up after a few moments, finally deciding to leave, adjusting his headphones.
"...Thanks anyways, mom, dad." Splin sighed. "Wherever you are."
He took a step forward, when suddenly the ground shook. Splin blinked, looking back up to the sky curiously. About to say something, he rose his finger, but ultimately decided not to say anything. More tremors shook the ground, this time visibly shaking buildings slightly, jellyfish passing by jiggling like gelatin.
"What the…?" Splin looked over, outside Inkopolis, where the beach he transcended dimensions at was. A small black dot was advancing towards Inkopolis, though slowly, it was clear that it was coming closer to the city.
Splin gulped, and began a brisk run towards Inkopolis Plaza, others nearby staring at him in confusion. They took a glance towards the shores, squinting their eyes, then began murmuring, all smartly walking away from the beach area as if they were used to giant machines of death rampages by now. Splin arrived at the plaza, looking around frantically, noticing a sleeping Spyke, still sitting calmly on his mat. Starting a jog towards the sea urchin, he momentarily paused, debating whether or not he should actually bother the urchin, but decided that to lessen the chance of an innocent(?) life being taken, ran over to the napping urchin.
"Spyke!" Splin said, tapping on the urchin's shoulder.
A slender hand shot out, grabbing Splin by the collar, Spyke's green eyes glaring at Splin, lowering in intensity upon realizing who he was grabbing.
"Sorry mate, not usually appreciative of those disturbing my naps." Spyke said calmly.
Splin swallowed nervously. "I-It's fine, look, there's a…"
"Another colossal behemoth about to lay waste to this city?" Spyke asked, Splin giving a slow nod. "Yep, figured as much. Don't worry, we already have an evacuation planned out."
Spyke pointed to the Squid Sisters' studio, the pop stars standing in front of cameras and a screen, Callie fidgeting with her fingers worryingly, while Marie appeared indisposed at the moment, carelessly looking elsewhere.
"Huh." Splin muttered.
"After that Skell incident, we decided to plan in cases of emergencies like this, just in case you blokes accidentally unleashed another threat to society by accident." Spyke explained.
"Wait, you know about that?" Splin asked.
"Love, talk gets around fast in this tiny city quicker than you think. It's just that these kids don't really care much for rampaging robots when they're watching Monday night Ranked Battles." Spyke said, lowering him onto the ground. "What are you waiting for, get outta here now, they're already evacuating everyone!"
Splin nodded, hopping out of Spyke's grasp, waving to him as he ran, Spyke giving a small nod of acknowledgement. Splin flattened himself across the ground as a squid, Super Jumping away.
Splin hit the side of the hill, climbing up quickly, reaching his house. Splin burst through the front doors, panting, and shouted, "SHE'S HERE!"
"What!?" Ix questioned, Splin dashing towards the television, turning it on.
The screen fizzled, a nervous pair of Squid Sisters onscreen.
"Breaking news! The robot that was causing trouble near Saltspray Rig is headed right for Inkopolis! And it's armed! Everyone RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Callie screamed, making a break for the studio exit, but was yanked back onstage by Marie, still calm compared to her cousin.
"It's got a while to get here, though, so just grab what you can and get to a safe location. We'll keep you updated on this as it unfolds." Marie said calmly, Callie calming down as well in the background.
"Damnit, Tek!" Rem snarled suddenly, stamping her foot on the floor.
Tek reappeared in the household, a puff of smoke following her. "A miscalculation on my part. Just do what you were going to do. Go!" She instructs them, vanishing with another puff of smoke.
"What are you waiting for!? Run!" Maria yelled, taking her Splat Charger, running out the door, Rem and Ix following her.
"L-Let me get some weapons, first!" Sharq said, running upstairs. Sharq stopped for a moment, looking around on the flat rooftop, the only thing on top a ruined Squid Beakon. "...Uh…"
A Sploosh-O-Matic and Mini Splatling popped into existence, two ink tanks falling next to them.
Got your back.
"Thanks voice!" Sharq said, grabbing the weapons and ink tanks, running back inside. "Come on, Splin!" Sharq said, tossing the Sploosh-O-Matic over to Splin as well as the ink tank, which Splin caught, sliding back a little from the catch. The two of them dashed out the door, leaving the hills, the others running towards Inkopolis.
Meanwhile, across the city of Inkopolis, various citizens were already prepared, packing away valuables and equipping ink weapons just in case things got a little too personal for their taste, locking their doors and taking shelter.
"Ha! Another machine of destruction? That's nothing compared to I, the great Ari!"
"Uh huh, and that's why you decided to take shelter here, huh?" Pela scoffed, shaking her head.
A group of Inklings, jellyfish, and other various sea creatures huddled inside of the Oahu restaurant, tables and chairs stacked up against the windows. Everyone present inside the restaurant backed away from the glass panes for fear that something could crash inside at any moment.
"It's for defense purposes." Ari stated condescendingly. "I will protect all of you if the robot breaches the walls!"
"So cool…" Sari, Rit, and Bas all swooned nearby, echoing.
"Th-Thank you, Ari. That's nice of you…" Aqua said nearby, though she was currently ducking behind a small table turned over, her tentacles wrapped over her head cautiously.
"Hey, maybe you could reward me for my efforts right now if you know what I mean." Ari said, puckering his lips somewhat. The only thing he managed to kiss was the flat surface of a frying pan, courtesy of Pela. "Ow, what's with you?!"
Pela smiled, taking her frying pan and stowing it in her chef's apron. "Kissing is not on the menu here, sweetheart."
Ari grumbled, rubbing his face, Aqua shuffling back a bit.
"Just to be clear, we're kicking him out if he tries that again, right?" Zip asked, aiming a Splat Charger at the door for defense reasons.
"I'm all for that plan!" Willie said, popping up with a Dynamo Roller in his hands, clenching the handle.
A few of the people sitting inside noticed something run past, everyone tensing up in response. Footsteps sounded off outside, when suddenly the door began to creak open, tables pushed ever so slightly, before the door couldn't budge anymore without knocking over a table. A glimpse of someone or something entered the thin space between the restaurant and the outside.
At this point, everyone went nuts, Zip firing bursts of ink, Willie flinging ink as well, Pela standing by with a kitchen knife, brandishing it dangerously, and surprisingly, Ari ran towards the door, fists raised.
Ari grabbed the "thing" and pulled it inside. "Ha ha! Gotcha now!"
"Oh, hey Ari!" Sharq waved, Ari yanking him by his head tentacles.
A huge sigh of relief surrounded the entire diner, Ari putting Sharq down in embarrassment.
"Rival? What are you doing here, get inside!" Ari said.
"Actually, I was just checking to see if people in here are okay, well equipped, you know?" Sharq looked over at the cash register counter, waving to the rest of the people there. The employees of the restaurant stowed away their weapons, waving nervously, Aqua waving just as nervously.
"Welp, time to go! See you guys later!" Sharq smiled, taking his cap off, and waving it as he left.
Sharq closed the door behind them, letting the restaurant patrons and employees alike sit and think over the absurdity of the situation.
"...If it helps, that was a pretty heroic act." Sari spoke up. "Rushing towards the door, I mean."
"Yeeeeeaaaaaah!" Ari exclaimed, heroically posing on top of a table, his squadron of females cheering him on.
A spoon flung from the kitchen knocked him down. "No standing on the tables!"
AN: Okay, I'm sorry OctoInkling75, I just had to include Aqua in one more chapter, had to get it out of my system. Hope you can understand, but I can cut out the part out if you wish.
Um, besides that, time to respond to reviews! Thank you Dread Angel for reviewing! All mechs could do with a little more personality if I do say so myself, though considering the quantity of murder drones with such personality… Uh… Maybe humor is the most I should write for these drones. Thank you everyone, again, for reading this story, this is ThePizzaLovingTurtle, hopefully I can outlive this hoard of zombies in L4D2 to write another day!