Cassandra found her rhythm in the steady rise and fall of the hammer as she struck at the cherry red rod of iron that lay against the anvil. This was her new way of unwinding. The training field would forever be tinged with the regret of her behavior towards the Herald on the night of that duel. She had lay on the floor afterwards, tossing and turning as her mind swam with unwanted lust and worry over what the dawn would bring. She would not have blamed the Inquisitor for dismissing her outright nor would she have been surprised to have been excluded from attending any more missions with the feisty rogue. Instead, Cassandra had been surprised to find her discarded breastplate and sword carefully placed in the corner of the forge she slept above. She had not heard the door open once in the night and it did not escape her notice that both pieces had been freshly polished; her sword had even been sharpened. The note left had been short, concise and to the point:
Seeker Pentaghast, I hope you will forgive me my actions this evening. I will not apologize for them, but know that your anger was not their intended goal and they will not be repeated. I hope that we can remain friends despite it.
Trevelyan
She had read the note too many times to count and the words "I will not apologize for them" stuck in her mind. In truth, she was the one who should apologize. She had been the one to strike first, without warning, both with her sword and with her kiss. She flushed in remembrance of the act. Even now her lips felt branded from their brief encounter. She lifted the hammer again to strike her irritation at the cooling rod below her when the light from an opening door drew her attention. She turned to see the shapely figure of the former Left hand slipping into the shadows of the forge. Cassandra scowled; Leliana rarely left her rookery. She lowered the hammer and turned to face the spymaster.
Leliana leaned against an opposite wall and stared at the tall warrior. She let her lips twitch upward in a small smirk and gestured to the scene before her.
"This is new Cassandra. I've never known you to smith your own weapons."
The seeker lifted an elegant eyebrow at the redhead and returned her jested in an irritated tone.
"Then I suppose there are still secrets kept hidden from you and your network of spies."
Leliana laughed softly, "Some are better kept hidden than others." She paused, shooting a piercing look at her former counterpart before continuing," and some chose to come to light beyond closed doors."
Cassandra glared back sharply, her brow furrowing as she turned back around with a huff and continued to strike the rod.
"I have told you before that I will not play this game of riddles with you; if you have something to say to me Leliana than speak it plainly."
The spymaster smiled and watched as Cassandra hammered her point home against the anvil. She stood and walked over to the Navarrean's side.
"I find it curious that you no longer frequent the training area here in Skyhold. The training dummies are looking especially whole now that you have ceased your aggression towards them."
Leliana circled around to face the dark-haired woman, wondering if her expression would give away more than her grunted words. She was not disappointed. The anger that flared in the seeker's eyes gave weight to the report her spy had given her. Curiosity drove her to continue the probe.
"I also find it curious that you no longer attend the war council meetings; having been such an essential part of forming the Inquisition. Has your passion for change been diverted?"
Cassandra remained silent. She was not surprised Leliana knew about what had happened in the training yard. Her spies were everywhere. Cassandra knew better than to deny it but she would not give the spymaster the satisfaction of admitting what had transpired. She watched as the spymaster circled closer and fought the flinch of her body at the soft touch of the spymaster's glove against her arm. She stiffened as the lithe rogue leaned against her back, her melodic voice dropping an octave to whisper in her ear.
"Or is it that your passions have simply changed?"
Cassandra ducked away, flushing as she turned to face the smiling face of Leliana. She rubbed the ear the voice had tickled and frowned.
"Drop it Leliana. I won't explain myself to you."
The spymaster shrugged and respectfully gave the seeker her space. In all the years she had known Cassandra she never would have predicted what had transpired between her and the Herald. In fact she had thought her spy had been exaggerating when he first brought her the report that Seeker Pentaghast had attached the Herald and then kissed her in plain view of anyone walking the keep. When the Divine had first introduced them, Leliana had attempted to charm the stoic and intimidating woman, but to no avail. There was something about the seeker that made her seem unattainable; and had they not been required to work closely together for the good of the Divine and the Chantry, Leliana might have pursued the beautiful warrior. Sadly, there had never been a right time and, though Cassandra accepted the subtle flirtatious suggestions Leliana had teasingly thrown her way; the Hero of Orlais had not once reciprocated.
It was only after some time in the service of Divine Justinia, that Leliana had learned that the seeker had only ever taken one lover; a mage named Regalyan, who had assisted in the battle to save the previous Divine's life. One lover in a lifetime; Leliana could not imagine such a thing; but to each her own.
She looked towards the seeker and smiled, "I am not judging you Cassandra, nor would I ever ask you to explain your actions to me, I was simply worried about you my friend and thought perhaps you would wish to talk of the matter."
Cassandra sighed and shook her head, "There is nothing to talk about. I was angry and I reacted childishly. The herald and I have agreed that what happened was foolish and will not be repeated again."
Cassandra watched as the spymaster tilted her head in a faint nod, silently moving towards the door. She caught the mischievous gaze once more as the nightingale left; her melodic words ringing in the emptiness of the forge.
"Then why shut yourself away from the world?"
The tall seeker huffed and scowled as she picked up her hammer to resume the loud banding that helped still the unwanted thoughts in her mind. She sighed and threw the hammer against the wall and into the corner with the rest of the tools. She sat down on a bench and rested her head in her hands, wishing that she had an answer to that question.
Evelyn smirked at the cute blonde in the bar. They had been flirting all night and despite the encouragement of her comrades, Evelyn found herself rooted in place. The young woman was beautiful and clearly receptive to her charms, but she just felt wrong. Her face was too round, her frame too short, her hair too long and her skin too pale. When the Inquisitor looked into her eyes, she found herself disappointed in their rich blue hues. Her heart wanted to gaze into something darker, her eyes wanted to roam someone more exotic and listen to a laugh tinged with the accent from a land so close and yet so far from her own.
The young rogue sighed, these feelings were getting old fast. It had been weeks since the incident in the training yard and, though they had been on several missions together, Evelyn had yet to see the seeker outside of battle or travel. When on the road, Cassandra was silent except for the traded barbs of conversation between herself and Varric. In battle she was all righteous anger and adrenaline channeled into being a protective shield for the Inquisitor. The few times Evelyn had attempted a light hearted conversation she had been left with a stony silence. The seeker was making it clear that they would be no more than battle companions and it stung.
Evelyn watched the pretty barmaid for a time. The maid incited nothing in her, but she had only to allow her mind to conjure up the tall imposing figure of Cassandra for her body to hum to life. It was maddening. She had sought relief over and over again as she tried to excise that stolen moment from the training yard from her mind, but to no avail.
Amazingly, she was hopelessly enamored with a woman who wanted nothing to do with her; a first for her. She tossed back the dregs of her drink, declining Varric's offer of another. She pulled up the hood of her cloak and left the warmth of the tavern for the privacy of her quarters. She kept her head down against the howl of the wind and took the long way back to her rooms. She had just cleared the first set of stairs when her body collided with another, sending her sprawling back. She was startled to look up into the concerned face of the woman who had been invading her thoughts for a fortnight.
Cassandra bent over the prone figure of the woman she had accidently knocked to the floor. She reached down, offering her hand and helped to bring the Inquisitor to her feet, ignoring the warmth that blossomed in her stomach at the innocent touch. She immediately dropped the rogue's hand and stepped away. She flushed slightly at the young woman's questioning look and cleared her throat.
"My apologies your worship, I came to talk to you but it is late, I should let you get your rest."
Evelyn reached out before she could stop herself and halted the warrior's retreat. She felt a shock go through her body and hoped that her eyes would not betray the warmth that coursed through her at such light contact.
"I have been wanting to talk to you as well Seeker Pentaghast, but you are right it is late and I for one am freezing. Lets talk in front of the fire."
She could see the taller woman calculating her response, weighing the propriety of it and assessing the risks of being behind closed doors with her. Evelyn found herself drowning in that dark calculating gaze for a moment before snapping out of it and taking the first step towards her rooms. She turned and saw the corners of the warriors lips turn downward. Seeking to distract the refusal of her offer, she stepped back and extended her arm, taking a small bow towards the unsmiling woman.
"You have my word as the Herald of Andraste that I will be mindful of your maidenly virtue and keep my hands to myself my dear seeker."
Cassandra felt raised an eyebrow at the jest, but accepted the offer of a warm fire – the sweat of her earlier actions had long since cooled on her skin and the temperature of Skyhold was typically freezing. Words were not her strong suit but somehow she found the perfect answer to the rogue's easy wit as she moved past the bowing woman to the 2nd set of stairs.
"I'm far from a maiden and you don't believe yourself to be the Herald so I am not sure what comfort that phrase is supposed to offer me. However, I too am chilled and this is a conversation that needs to be had."
She caught the crooked grin before ascending the stairs towards the Inquisitor's rooms and found it odd that she should fight to return one. Despite their brief history, the rogue had a unique way of disarming her that Cassandra found simultaneously fascinating and annoying. In a way she reminded her of Leliana, but without the sex-laced voice and all-knowing smiles. That particular rogue had always succeeded in putting her on edge when they had first been introduced. Cassandra had grown used to the subtle double-entendres and flirtatious hints the former Left hand was fond of throwing her way, but Leliana had never caused the storm of emotion in her that the Inquisitor had – and that made the latter far more dangerous.
Evelyn followed a few steps behind, enjoying the view of the seeker's swaying hips. Her mind was stuck in fantasizing how those hips would feel in her hands, pulled against her own. She closed her eyes, breaking the contact and took a deep breath. The sooner this conversation was over the sooner she could work to relieve the aching tension between her legs that seemed to only happen in the seeker's presence. She wondered what it was that the seeker was so keen to say to her, especially since the woman had refused to speak to her until now.
She moved up the last of the steps quickly, beating the warrior to the door and opening it for her. Evelyn smiled as the seeker frowned but accepted the gesture with a stiff nod, continuing her way up the last set of stairs. The noblewoman followed, letting herself enjoy the unobstructed view once more before having to bottle her desire back up.
Cassandra had not been to this wing of the keep and found herself curious as to what she would find. She did not know the rogue well enough to guess her tastes but found herself pleasantly surprised by the simple, yet elegant, décor that greeted her sweeping gaze. As if reading her mind the Inquisitor's voice broke the silence.
"I have Josephine to thank for this; such elegant taste has always been beyond my skill set. If I had it my way I would probably set up a tent out on the balcony and sleep beneath the stars."
The seeker turned to look at the Herald of Andraste, surprised by the admission. She tilted her head slightly and studied the smaller woman who, like her, seemed discomforted by her noble heritage. It was rare to find someone else that felt that way. It suddenly occurred to her that she knew almost nothing about the woman she had pledged to follow. She wanted to know more but was unsure of what or how to ask so she stood in silence as she watched the Herald kneel before the hearth, coaxing it from its current state of glowing embers into a roaring flame.
Evelyn felt the seeker's dark eyes follow her and she ignored the warm flush such knowledge created. She was already warm from kneeling in front of the fire and from watching the seeker's shapely climb to her quarters. She had promised the beautiful woman a safe sanctuary under the guise of friendship and she was loath to so quickly go back on her word. Maker help her though, she wanted nothing more than to bury her hands in the soft fragrant black locks and feel the hot brand of the Navarrean's kiss on her lips. Seeking to distract herself from the constant plague of unwelcome thoughts by taking on the role of a good hostess, Evelyn rose to her feet and motioned to the nearest chair.
"Sit by the fire and warm yourself Cassandra. You don't need to stand always be at attention on my presence."
She felt a faint grin lift the corners of her mouth as the seeker frowned down at the chair, seating herself reluctantly on the edge. The Trevelyan noble spotted a single bottle of Antivan wine resting in the corner and moved to retrieve it. She was thirsty and the vintage had been too lovely to drink alone. She deftly uncorked the bottle and poured a glass for herself and the seeker. She walked to where the woman sat and offered her one of the glasses, unsurprised by the seeker's rebuff.
"No thank you. It is late and I am not thirsty."
Cassandra scowled at the tinkling laughter that rang from the rogue's lips; she did not see the humor or appreciate being laughed at. She started to stand, her voice a huff.
"Clearly this was a mistake Inquisitor. I thought you were serious when you said that you wanted to speak with me."
Evelyn risked the seeker's wrath a 2nd time and reached out to still her movement, frowning slightly as the warrior shrugged off her light touch.
"Wait Cassandra, I do want to talk with you. I simple found myself thirsty and this is too good a vintage to take alone but if sharing a glass of wine with me makes you uneasy then, by all means, refrain; but unless you have tried a good Antivan wine you don't know what you are missing."
To drive the point home she tipped the glass up and took a long swallow, closing her eyes as the flavors of the spiced wine played across her taste buds. She licked her lips slowly and gave a sigh of appreciation. She was surprised when the seeker leaned forward and took the untouched glass, giving the wine a sniff before tasting it tentatively. Evelyn watched, mesmerized, as the seeker's mouth relaxed into a small smile and she leaned back in the chair crossing her legs. Taking the hint, the rogue pulled up the only other chair in the room and settled in by the fire.
They sipped the wine in silence as the fire roared. It was almost too intimate for Cassandra to feel truly at ease but the Herald had been right, the wine was good. She chanced a glance over at the Herald of Andraste, appreciating the way the glow from the fire highlighted her features. She thought back to her earlier realization and broke the silence between them.
"So, it occurred to me that I do not know much about you Trevelyan."
Evelyn looked over at the seeker, surprised by the statement. She shrugged as she leaned back against the chair, taking a small sip before responding, "Is that what brought you to wait by my door so late in the night?"
Cassandra flushed but persisted, "No, I will get to that. I simply realized that I know nothing about the very person I am trusting to lead this Inquisition and I find myself unsettled in that knowledge."
The Inquisitor nodded. The seeker's logic made perfect sense but she was unsure how much of herself to reveal to the dark haired warrior. She had not made it a habit in life of sharing her past with many people; afraid of what reaction they would have when faced with the knowledge of her past sins. She wanted to trust the seeker, but wasn't sure where to start. She took another small sip before continuing.
"What is it you wish to know?"
She waited, hoping the seeker would keep the questions away from her deeper secrets and was not disappointed when Cassandra opened the conversation by asking why she was estranged from her family. Evelyn smiled at the warrior and shrugged.
"Simple, I was unwilling to play my part and use my body and freedom to secure a powerful alliance. This angered my father and I was persuaded to leave and pursue other avenues of interest."
Cassandra took another drink of the wine before asking what other avenues of interest. She found herself relaxing as the Inquisitor affably described her life on the road and the many people she had encountered. Cassandra could not help but add her own tales to the conversation and she found herself smiling easily and even laughing at some of the Inquisitor's more elaborate tales. She was unsure whether it was the excellent wine, the warmth of the fire or the smooth voice of the woman opposite of her, but the seeker felt content and very warm all of a sudden.
She tugged at the laces of her tunic, opening the shirt slightly and pushing up her sleeves. She found herself studying the rogue across from her. Though she did not claim to find women attractive there was something about the way the firelight enhanced the rogue's visage, making her appear – for lack of a better term – breathtaking. The seeker frowned at the disturbing line of where her thoughts were going. She swallowed, her throat feeling dry suddenly as though parched from heat and she tipped her glass up again, disappointed to find it empty.
Evelyn saw the small frown and hid her smile; she had not anticipated the seeker wanting more than one glass. Determined to be a gracious host, she stood and grabbed the bottle of wine and poured the warrior another glass despite her insistence that she was done. Wine seemed to relax the normally harsh features of the battle-hardened woman and Evelyn was enjoying seeing her without the trademark scowl she often wore.
She filled her glass as well before sitting back down. The wine was beginning to accentuate the pleasant hum of her body that being so close to Cassandra had started and watching her relax was not helping matters; especially since she could see the twin swells of flesh peeking through the opening in the seeker's tunic. Evelyn swallowed and tried not to stare at the sight; instead she returned back to their conversation and began to ask the Navarran questions about her own travels and history. Hours soon passed and the wine bottle was empty before she figured she should steer the conversation towards its original intent before she did or said something she would later regret.
"So, what is it you wanted to see me about?"
Cassandra was startled by the directness of the Inquisitor's tone. She had almost forgotten why she came here in the first place. It was an odd feeling to get so lost in conversation. She was unsure how to begin and hesitant to broach the subject, she cursed the foolish honor that had compelled her to seek the Inquisitor out in the first place. Cassandra took a long drink, finishing what was left of her wine before setting the glass down. She stared into the bright green eyes across the room and sighed.
"It seems I owe you an apology your worship."
She paused and looked down, words were not her forte and apologizing for her actions was foreign to her, but something compelled her to continue.
" You stated in your note that you would not apologize for what happened during our duel and those words reminded me that it was I, who needed to beg your forgiveness. I reacted to your taunts in anger. I never should have swung at you without warning and I should not have used your reward to punish you. It was a mistake that should not be repeated and, if not friends, I hope that we can at least remain companions."
She chanced a look at the Herald's face and found she could not read her. She ran her fingers through her short locks and stood, feeling the awkwardness of the situation.
"I should go Inquisitor. Thank you for your time and the wine and the fire and…."
She stopped as the rogue stood, blocking her escape route and looked down at the hand that lay flattened against her collarbone. The rogue was no mage, but it felt as though she was pouring electricity into the seeker's body. Cassandra let out an uneven breath as she was gently pushed back, the back of her calves hitting the seat of the chair before she, ungracefully, sat back down. The rogue loomed over her and then to Cassandra's surprise she knelt down in front of her, her hands resting squarely on the seeker's knees; her tone clearly stating no argument.
"Sit. Listen."
Evelyn stared into the seeker's dark eyes and felt the muscles beneath her hands flex as though to rise, but the woman remained sitting.
"You owe me nothing Cassandra. You might have made the first move but I wanted that kiss… I want it still but we make a great team in the battlefield and I won't ruin that simply because I desire you."
Cassandra felt her cheeks flush as the Inquisitor's words registered in her ears. Her skin burned where the smaller woman's hands rested. She had forgotten what it was like to be wanted and for a moment the years melted away and it was Regalyan in front of her telling her that he wanted her. She remembered her disbelief and the way she had immediately rejected the idea, but over time his gentle protectiveness of her had worn down her resistance.
After being named the Right Hand of the Divine she had celebrated by gifting him her virginity and for a while she had known happiness with another; but duty called and their responsibilities pulled them in opposite directions; effectively ending their brief romance. She had thought that part of her life to be long over but now, staring into the darkening green eyes of the Herald of Andraste, Cassandra could admit that she missed being close to another – though she was unprepared for that to be another woman.
The Inquisitor watched the emotions playing on the seeker's face but, try as she might, she could not read the other woman's thoughts. She watched as the tall warrior unconsciously licked her lips and the rogue swallowed hard as she remembered the heady taste of the Navarrean's lips. She closed her eyes and squeezed the tight muscles beneath her hands, her voice shaking slightly as she fought the urge to lean forward.
"You should go Cassandra. The hour is late and my willpower is quickly fading."
The husky tone of the other woman's voice seemed to stop time and Cassandra felt her body become hyper aware of how close they were. Dark eyes searched pale features, curious and in wonder that she could be the cause of the rogue's loss of willpower. The very thought was arousing and the seeker felt her body respond. Her eyes widened in surprise as she watched the younger woman lean forward, lips parted.
Evelyn stopped as her shoulder met with resistance and looked up into a familiar gaze as she registered the warmth of the seeker's calloused palm on her shoulder. She exhaled slowly as she tried to ignore the throbbing pressure between her thighs and the electric feel of being touched by the object of her desire. She felt equal parts of relief and frustration by the fact that the seeker had halted her movements. She started to joke that she should get off her knees before someone saw them and mistook who was the Herald and who was the seeker but her words died in her throat as that hot calloused palm slowly slid up the length of her neck to cup her cheek. She felt the brush of a single digit as it swept across her lower lip and her breath caught as accented words broke the silent tension.
"I do not know what to do about you... about this feeling when I am with you…"
Evelyn felt her heart quicken as she dared to slide her hands higher up the seeker's hard thighs. They were inches apart and the rogue wanted nothing more than to close the gap but the next move would have to be the seekers. She felt Cassandra's thumb brush across her lip and the whisper of the seeker's words as her lips brushed against her own.
"I do not like this constant confusion… I am never like this and yet… with you nothing is as it should be."
Evelyn gasped as the seeker's soft lips captured her own and she felt herself pulled forward between the woman's open thighs. Unlike their previous kiss, which had been all force and fire, this one was slow, letting the heat built between them. The warrior tasted of spiced wine and something that was uniquely her own, more intoxicating than Evelyn remembered.
Cassandra's mind was reeling. A part of her screamed to stop, while other parts of her begged for more. Her hedonistic side won and she let herself be drawn further into the web of need the talented rogue was weaving. Every stroke of the Inquisitor's tongue against hers flamed the fire inside her. She felt the press of the rogue's chest against her own as the hands on her thighs slid higher to cup her hips. Strong lithe fingers tugged gently at her hair as the kiss deepened; the rogue's clever tongue dancing in and out of her mouth, mimicking the rhythm of the other activities her body was beginning to crave. Cassandra tipped her head back as the talented woman's mouth descended lower, her teeth nipping at the sensitive skin of the seeker's neck, before soothing the bite with her tongue. The seeker gasped as the rogue's hand drifted up her side and covered one of her breasts; her nimble fingers teasing its sensitive peak through the thin fabric of the tunic.
Evelyn felt the seekers hips rocking against her waist. It took every ounce of her control to stop herself from ripping the clothes from that muscular body and burying herself in the slick heat she knew was waiting for her between the muscled thighs. She could see the outline of the warrior's hardened peak through the cloth of the tunic and bent her head to tease the bud with her tongue. The warrior seemed to bend to her will as her back arched, pushing herself decisively against Evelyn's lips as a strangled moan escaped parted lips.
Oddly enough it was that moan that brought the reality of the situation crashing down on the seeker and immediately she pushed the rogue away. This was not supposed to happen. Cassandra wanted to blame the Inquisitor or the wine, or the fact that her body was starved for the touch of another but the honorable part of her would not let her cast her own blame aside. She had let it happen. She had heard the warning bells going off in her own mind when the rogue told her to leave and yet she had stayed. She had wanted to know if the rush of heat between the two of them would happen again; she had given into her curiosity and Maker she wished she had not. Some knowledge was dangerous. She knew this and knowing that the beautiful noble desired her enough to shake her control, had inflated the Seeker's ego and reminded her that she wasn't made of stone.
She wanted to run away from the scene, but she had already run from this woman once. She was no coward and she would not run again. Steeling herself she gazed into the piercing green eyes that stared back at her and shook her head, her accent thickened by the need the rogue had awakened in her.
"This cannot be between us. You are the Inquisitor, the Herald of Andraste, my sworn leader and… you are a woman. We cannot be lovers, we can only be friends."
Evelyn looked back at the seeker and tilted her head to the side slightly. Of all the reasons the beautiful seeker had listed the last was the most laughable. Her gender seemed to have been the least of the seeker's concern when she had been moaning beneath her lips. Tact stopped the rogue from saying such so she tried a different tactic.
"Would you still feel the same if I were a man?"
Cassandra frowned at the questions, her brow furrowed in thought, "But you are not a man."
Trevelyan nodded slowly, her lips twitching slightly as she pushed the seeker for an answer.
"No. I think that has been well established. I mean, would you fight what we feel for each other as hard as you are, if I were a man? Would you give me these same excuses? Would you push me away even though your body calls for more?
The Herald delivered the last line of questioning as she tucked an errant strand of black hair behind the seeker's ear, staring into her deep eyes; curious to hear the denial she was certain would be on the lips she had so recently devoured.
Cassandra paused as she thought over what the Inquisitor had said. She made several sound points. Would she fight so hard against this if the rogue in front of her were a man instead of a woman? She had not fought Regalyan this hard and he had been a mage; a wielder of magic like the ones who had struck down Anthony. She was distracted from her thoughts as the redhead stood up and stepped away. The seeker followed suit as she continued to puzzle over the questions the Herald had posed.
Evelyn walked to the door of her quarters and opened it, watching as the taller woman walked through it, her face still clouded by doubt. She impulsively reached out and grabbed the seeker by the hand, ignoring the puzzled look on the Navarrean's face; Evelyn lifted the hand to her mouth and kissed the back of it lightly. She stared into the dark honeyed eyes, her voice barely a whisper in the dark shadows of the walkway.
"When you have your answer, come and find me. Until then I will see you on the battlefield."
She let the seeker's hand fall to her side before slowly closing the door; she leaned her back against it before she could undo her actions; she wondered how long she would have to wait for an answer.